"Bill Nye Saves the World" writer Flora Lichtman teaches us how to fish, how to get paid to live in an Italian paradise, how to whale-watch for a living, how to work in public radio, how to have a hateable voice, how to kill a whale with pop music, how to know the difference between lure and bait, how to eat poison fish from the East River, and how to deal with a sleepy podcast host.

"Bill Nye" writer and radio host Sanden Totten teaches us how to be a JNCO-wearing punk, how to have Drucker as a boss, how to do a killer Ira Glass impression, how to be a "Game of Thrones" character, how to break into the sexy world of public radio, how to draw someone just from the sound of their voice, how to have fun in Bakersfield, California, how to rock out to a break-up song, and most importantly, how to deal with a dog that likes ska music. Then we play a game of "Punk Rock Grandma." What is that, you ask? We don't know! We just made it up!

Featuring us! And discussions about FaceTiming, group email anxiety, healthy water for dogs, saying goodbye to your old life, the country of Molliday, preparing for a massive earthquake, browser tab maintenance, and the true lesson of "Jiro Dreams of Sushi"-- just give up.

"Deadpool" and "Chewbacca" writer Gerry Duggan teaches us how to break into the world of comics, how to write for Deadpool, how to meet people at a comic book shop, how to write for an awards show hosted by Patton Oswalt, how to move to Los Angeles with nothing, how to embarrass yourself in front of Clint Eastwood, how to socialize at Comic-Con, and how to kill yourself in a Volkswagen Jetta. Then we play "Ultimate Crossover Battle," where Gerry tells us who would win the greatest crossovers of all time. Could Spider-Man take on an elderly man named Ben? Excelsior!

"Love" and "American Dad" writer Ali Waller teaches us how to build an empire of inspirational quotes, how to enjoy jam bands on molly, how to get a screenplay on the Black List, how to work with Judd Apatow, how to sneak into a Justin Bieber movie, how to write jokes for a living, how to let an Italian man climax on your face, how to get called mean by David Spade, how to flirt with your cat's cardiologist, and how to succeed by doing the opposite of good advice. Then we play "Mad Quotes," where Ali ruins our game by actually knowing every inspirational quote ever said. "Not cool, bro!" -Gandhi

Comedian and writer Joselyn Hughes teaches us how to fully appreciate the Backstreet Boys, how to say "crotch mouth" in Spanish, how to be a "graffiti consultant," how to suffer through an open mic, how to meet J.J. Abrams, how to perform at a casino, how to blog for Tosh.0, how to get fired from a restaurant, and how to make the most out of condoms and coffee filters. Then we challenge Joselyn to create art out of boring household items.

"The Good Place" star D'Arcy Carden teaches us how to not hate annoying people, how to handle horrible YouTube comments, how to become a famous photographer on Instagram, how to star in an NBC sitcom, how to be the class clown, how to survive drama school, how to impress cool musicians with improv comedy, how to be friends with Ted Danson, and how to imagine someone as a baby to stop hating them. Then we play a game where we find the redeeming qualities of Hitler and cyclists. 

"Brooklyn 99" and "Late Night" writer Alison Agosti teaches us how to find the best songs about conspiracy theories, how to be polite to people who get your name wrong, how to love dogs, how to not laugh at the name Rancho Cucamonga, how to write for a UCB sketch team, how to get a TV job from Twitter, how to fall in love in New York City, and how to find the worst music on YouTube. This entire episode was an inside job.

Comedian Jak Knight teaches us how to make Jolly Rancher sizzurp, how to deal with hecklers, how to succeed in comedy after only three years. how to have the worst Uber ride of all time, how to make your own nut milk, how to shut down a drunk racist, how to accidentally make cops fight each other, and how to make everyone jealous of your youth. Then we play "Yeezy Does It," where we find out how Kanye West would justify kicking a baby. Also, we are legally obligated to say that we do not condone or recommend trying anything we learned in this episode. (Especially making nut milk.)