Human Being Project

If I were to ask you what you dream about, like who you want to be or what you want to accomplish, what would your answer be?

Are you working toward that dream, or have you let it go because it's not "realistic?"

Maybe you don't even have a dream because surviving is more pressing right now.

If we asked younger you what you imagined for yourself, what would that innocent, hopeful, trusting version of you say? What dream enticed you back then?

Did you chase it?

What if I told you that your dream is your destiny, and pursuing it will set you free?

In today's episode, we talk about where dreams come from, why they pull at us, and what to do with them.

Get ready for some heart talk - because you need it today. ♥️

Show Notes & Transcript

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We're following up this week with Mathias, an overworked and burnt-out small business owner looking for greater fulfillment in his work and personal life. Just four weeks after our first conversation, we reconnected to discover his biggest takeaways and how they've affected his life since we spoke.

One thing I've noticed about Mathias is he's a doer. He takes all of his responsibilities seriously, including the little experiments we asked him to try in last week's episode.

The purpose of little experiments is to dabble in change - to try a different way of doing or thinking about something without making a full-fledged commitment to change it permanently.

There is no "should" or "shouldn't" in the experimentation process, only curiosity. The experiments are not intended to bind you to something long-term but to help you explore alternatives for short periods.

The most important part of the experimentation process is collecting the data. How did you feel before, during, and after the experiment? Were the results what you expected, or did you surprise yourself? Did the process spark new ideas for further experimentation?

I see the experimentation process as an important "doing" exercise, while the data collection process is more "being" focused, requiring introspection and self-reflection.

Let's see how it went for Mathias...

Show Notes & Transcript

⏭️  Listen to E10 | Running On Empty Trying To Keep Everyone Happy with Mathias Woronchak: Part 1 

The Maximize Your Time & Energy Workbook

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In this week's episode, we talk with Mathias, who feels restless within the confines of a life he admits he freely chose - thirty years ago. Although he owns and operates a thriving small business, he wonders if his time and energy would be more impactful elsewhere.

The pervading theme of this episode seems to be Mathias's sense of duty and a perceived lack of freedom to do what nurtures and renews him.

He's a dutiful son, active in his community, and devoted to his clientele. He loves and appreciates his partner of five years but is so overwhelmed by his obligations and time commitments that they don't get to spend enough quality time together. 

Mathias is a giver, but as he explains throughout the episode, it's difficult to pour from an empty cup.

His story is not uncommon. In fact, as you listen, you'll likely relate on some level.

But the answer is simple, really. The restlessness he feels is his heart telling him to slow down, do less, and prioritize his dreams - if he can remember what they are.

Show Notes & Transcript 

⏭️  Listen to E11 | Running On Empty Trying To Keep Everyone Happy with Mathias Woronchak: Part 2

The Maximize Your Time & Energy Workbook

What did you think of this shorter episode? Let us know on Spotify by clicking reply in the Q&A section for this episode, or visit The Change Evolutionist on Facebook, Instagram, or LinkedIn to share your thoughts!

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How much of yourself do you close off, edit, or reframe to make other people feel more comfortable? How important is the approval, validation, and acceptance of others?

Do you even know who you are deep down?

If you don't truly know yourself enough to know when you're being authentic and when you're not, or you don't feel safe or comfortable fully expressing yourself, you probably have some inner work to do with self-acceptance.

Being authentically you means you're the same person regardless of who you're with or where you are, and your values, priorities, and dreams remain constant.

It means you don't edit yourself to be a version of yourself that others find tolerable.

So, HOW do you accept yourself for who you really are? How do you show up in your life authentically without apology, especially when it feels very unsafe to do so?

In this week's episode, we're talking about external identifiers and how they can lead to judgment and serious pressure to conform or fit in. We discuss how these external identifiers have created a culture that is unsafe for personal expression, UNLESS...

You're willing to be brave and be yourself, no matter what.

PS: We have a group coaching session on this topic coming soon. If knowing who you are and/or being authentic is something you struggle with, this is for you! Stay tuned for more details.

Show Notes & Transcript

[00:54] How self-acceptance is affected by external influences, like the societal standards portrayed in social media.

[02:38] Societal standards sabotage your joy if you buy into them.

[03:10] We filter and edit ourselves to be "okay" in Western society.

[04:20] Janelle talks about how she doesn't fit into societal standards and how it would affect her ability to be authentic if she fell prey to the pressure to conform.

[05:25] Even when you do all the things to conform or fit in, some people still won't like you, making the abandonment of your authentic self pointless.

[07:00] Ron talks about the concept of gender identity as a search for who you are.

[09:00] Gender, race, cultural affiliations, and religion are all external identifiers, but they do not define who you are on the inside. Only you can do that.

[10:45] What if you are oppressed, harassed, or bullied for being your authentic self? What if your freedoms are affected and prevent you from openly being who you are?

[12:50] Janelle and Ron discuss boundaries: how they work for you and against you.

[13:40] Janelle shares her journey toward self-acceptance during Covid.

[15:25] Without being defensive or antagonistic, you determine how you feel most yourself -and honor it, because no one else will before you do.

[16:00] Ron acknowledges the impact of a mother who believed in, supported, and encouraged him for who he was.

[16:40] If you show up as yourself, other people will adjust.

[17:15] As you embrace your authentic self, you'll realize that nobody cares.

What You Think of Me is None of My Business by Terry Cole-Whittaker

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Are you just itching to weigh in on the topic we're discussing? Maybe we've said something that has triggered you, or you feel there's a perspective we're missing. Maybe you agree a thousand percent, and you have your own story. Don't sit silent on the sidelines! Let your voice be heard! You can now record your question through PodInbox. Set up an account and record! Your question, your comment, your feedback, and our response to it will be featured in a future episode. It's that easy! 

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This week, we welcome back Elena for part two of Connecting to Your Spirit Through Big Life Transitions. In this episode, Elena shares five powerful ways to recalibrate when you feel rocked by a new experience happening in your life.

For Elena, the catalyst for her deep spiritual growth journey was the process of retirement. For you, it might be the ending of a relationship or the start of a new one. It might be the birth of a child, the loss of a pet, or adjusting to your new body after weight loss. 

Throughout the episode, Elena shares with us the practices she uses to nurture her spiritual connection - things like a daily review, journaling, and silent retreats (which you can do at home).

Any external transition, big or small, can lead to internal questions about who you are and where you belong. But by connecting to your spirit, you'll discover that everything you need and want is within you. 

In this quick 20-minute episode, you'll learn tangible ways to step into your divine spiritual energy and open your heart to the possibility that whatever is happening right now is happening for you.

Are you ready? Let's dive in!

Show Notes & Transcript

⏭️ Listen to E7 | Connecting To Your Spirit Through Big Life Transitions with Elena Borrega: Part 1

[2:00] Elena talks about silent retreats as a way to develop your spirituality.

[3:20] Don't have the time or resources to go to a silent retreat? Create your own at home!

[4:40] Ak yourself, "How am I going to show up for people? How will I respond to difficult people and circumstances?"

[5:20] Responding with the light in you. Use a lovingkindness meditation, which involves mentally sending goodwill, kindness, and warmth towards yourself and others by silently repeating a series of mantras.

[6:50] It's okay to have moments where you're not your best. The practice is to become increasingly aware of the way you show up in the world and make adjustments as you grow. It's never too late to shift.

[8:40] Elena talks about reviewing your day, where you look for the ways you showed up and the things you might need to work on.

[10:15] Ron stresses the importance of asking yourself when reviewing your day why you didn't show up the way you wanted to. Why did that trigger you? Why was that your reaction to that situation? It's dealing with the root of the problem instead of just the fruit of the problem.

[11:40] Elena talks about her resistance relationship with journaling and the importance of meditation, prayer, or contemplation before journaling.

[14:15] Ron suggests using key words or phrases when journaling and taking inventory of where you've been.

[15:49] Janelle talks about how documenting the details of the day has been her go-to journaling process but it feels tedious and disconnected now and doesn't serve her anymore.

[16:45] Elena shares an easy first step to take on the path to deeper spiritual connection.

What did you think of this shorter episode? Let us know on Spotify by clicking reply in the Q&A section for this episode, or visit The Change Evolutionist on Facebook, Instagram, or LinkedIn to share your thoughts!

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Today's episode is part one of a two-part discussion with Elena, a former daycare director who has recently retired from a career she loved for over forty years.

During our discussion, we examine something we don't talk openly about in society - the emotional toll of big life transitions like retirement. The truth is, it's not unusual to experience grief, deep sadness, loss of identity, and depression.

A big life transition can be any major event that challenges who you believe yourself to be, like:

Throughout this episode, Elena shares how the process of retiring was an emotional roller coaster with unexpected twists and turns.

But she has an incredible message of hope to share with those who are going through a similar shift.

Elena says that if you approach the process with openness, self-compassion, and surrender, it offers a beautiful and profound opportunity for deep personal and spiritual growth.

Don't miss this episode! Download and listen on the go. It's so worth it.

Full Show Notes & Transcript

⏭️ Listen to E8 | Connecting To Your Spirit Through Big Life Transitions with Elena Borrega: Part 2

[1:30] Elena talks about the struggle to find meaning and purpose after leaving her 40-year career. She knew grasping at any opportunity to busy herself wouldn't serve her and instead trusted that life would bring what it needed to bring.

[3:00] Elena shares how her faith and the support of her community helped her to come to a place where she felt okay inside, but it didn't happen quickly, and she didn't rush the process.

[5:00] Elena talks about the importance of a daily routine to prepare your heart and mind for the period of growth and renewal that lies ahead.

[5:50] Elena shares that a significant part of her process was making space for the opportunities that she knew were coming to pour meaning back into her life. And sure enough, opportunities came, one by one.

[6:50] Stephen Covey's wall reference in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, "If the ladder is not leaning against the right wall, every step we take just gets us to the wrong place faster."

[8:15] Elena talks about the term "discernment" and what it means to her.

[10:05] Ron asks Elena to share her perception of the difference between "grasping" and "discerning."

[11:20] How do we prove our worth and do we have to? Elena talks about frequently being asked, "So, what did you do today?"

[12:40] Elena talks about how social media and technology make it difficult to be in our "being" state.

[13:15] Janelle asks Elena to share what a good first step might be for someone feeling lost and misunderstood during a major life transition like divorce, illness, or retirement.

[16:00] Elena talks about facing her own mortality.

[16:30] Ron talks about the inevitability of death, quoting Wayne Dyer, "Experience life on the active side of infinity, knowing yourself first and foremost as a spiritual being having a temporary human experience, rather than the other way around."

[17:10] Ron talks about facing his mortality and the importance of making a conscious decision every day to be grateful for life and live it to the fullest, with more presence and less pressure to be productive.

[18:54] Janelle reminds us that although we need to show up in the world, we have to start by showing up for ourselves first.

[19:35] Janelle asks Elena to describe what a spiritual director is and how to get one.

Elena recommends the Ignatian Spirituality Center of Montreal for spiritual retreats and spiritual direction. 

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer

Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life by Wayne Dyer

What did you think of this shorter episode? Let us know on Spotify by clicking reply in the Q&A section for this episode, or visit The Change Evolutionist on Facebook, Instagram, or LinkedIn to share your thoughts!

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Do you ever feel like the day gets away from you? Like you're scrambling to keep up with the demands on your time and energy?

When your head hits the pillow, do you feel discouraged because you didn't accomplish what you'd hoped to?

In today's episode, we talk about a daily ritual, which is one of the most impactful things you can do to start (or end) your day aligned and connected to your purpose and intuition.

So, what's a daily ritual?

A daily ritual is internally motivated, meaning its purpose is to help you connect with the essence of who you are and what you're called to do. It may include things like a gratitude practice, time in nature, self-reflection, reading, meditating, journaling, reciting mantras or affirmations, setting an intention for the day, or anything you choose that synchronizes heart and mind through present-moment awareness and reflection.

A daily ritual supports personal growth, mental clarity and focus, attitude, and spiritual connection. By prioritizing time each day to nurture your inner space and connect to your innate spiritual energy, you can expect to feel less anxious and more peaceful, clear and focused rather than scattered and distracted, confident and self-assured rather than indecisive and intimidated, and most importantly, deeply connected - on a soul level - to your sense of being.  

If you're feeling disconnected, scattered, overwhelmed, or exhausted throughout the day, this episode is for you!

Full Show Notes & Transcript

[00:16] The difference between a daily ritual and a daily routine.

[02:00] Ron and Janelle talk about what their morning rituals entail.

[07:47] A daily ritual doesn't have to take a lot of time.

[08:45] Martin Luther understood that the busier he was, the more important the daily ritual.

[9:50] How is your day affected when you don't have a daily ritual?

[10:56] The act of establishing a daily ritual is like an intention that you set for the day.

[11:56] No time for a daily ritual? Ron offers a way to implement one without feeling like it's a major time commitment. 

[15:05] You can do anything mindfully or mindlessly. It takes the same amount of time, so why not do it mindfully?

[18:05] You can do a daily ritual at any point in the day - when you wake up, as you settle into bed, or on your lunch break! 

[19:10] Your daily ritual is a renewing practice that leaves you feeling fulfilled rather than depleted.

The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson

The Bible

The Power of Intention by Wayne Dyer (Illustrated version)

What did you think of this shorter episode? Let us know on Spotify by clicking reply in the Q&A section for this episode, or visit The Change Evolutionist on Facebook, Instagram, or LinkedIn to share your thoughts!

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In this latest episode of the podcast, our guest (and my friend), Cristy, is becoming more aware of her communication patterns, specifically with her husband. For the last few years, she's been working hard in her professional relationships and with friends to become a better listener and collaborator, making space for the perspective and opinions of others.

But, like many of us (me included), she still struggles to communicate effectively with her husband and kids. Which makes sense because these are the relationships with the highest expectations. They're also the relationships with the most deeply ingrained communication patterns.

Throughout the episode, Ron offers unique insights into why we struggle most with the ones we love. He shares a quick and easy way to defuse an argument before it becomes an all-out war and walks us through a simple communication method that allows everyone (including you) to feel heard and fully understood.

This episode was a huge reminder for me that communication is a language, and to become fluent in it, you have to be present and patient.

And practice, practice, practice.

Are you ready for some aha moments?

Full Show Notes

⏭️ Listen to E17 | How Do I Communicate With The People I Love? with Cristy Slozka: The Follow up

[01:10] Cristy talks about her struggle to implement the communication skills she's learned and used successfully at work in her personal relationships.

[02:16] Cristy talks about going into conversations with good intentions, but lapsing into old habits when triggered, usually because she doesn't feel heard even though she feels she is listening to and validating the other person.

[03:57] Janelle asks Cristy if she's testing the communication techniques she's learned to see if they work. Cristy is concerned that if people know she's implementing these techniques, the methods may not be as effective.

[04:38] Communication techniques are only effective when coupled with the heartfelt intention to deepen the relationship through openness and vulnerability.

[05:31] Cristy talks about how the communication between her and her spouse breaks down.

[06:05] Communication skills can be improved over time and with practice, but we often only work on them when there's an imminent threat to the relationship.

[07:15] Not everyone sees a need to work on their communication skills, and you can't force them to, even if your relationship is suffering.

[07:23] Each of us hears messages through our filters.

"The message you're sending is almost never the message being received."

[9:15] The whole point of good communication is to lower the resistance to the message.

[9:45] Recognizing established patterns of communication in your relationships. Want to change the way you communicate? Break the pattern, together or alone.

[12:55] Cristy talks about the frustration of arguments that never resolve. Do both parties have to agree for a conflict to be resolved? 

[14:00] Ron shares a clever way to keep a fight from escalating.

[16:00] A relationship without disagreements is dysfunctional because somebody's not saying what they think.

"You cannot have two people in such agreement that they never fight."

[17:00] Conflict in a relationship is inevitable. Use it to build instead of destroy. 

[17:15] Ron offers a tried and true communication method that allows both parties to feel heard and fully understand each other.

You don't have to agree, but try with all your might to understand.

[20:30] In conversations, we have something we want to say, and in an effort not to forget it, we stop listening. This is how communication breaks down. Get the whole story first, then respond.

[22:14] Cristy talks about feeling frustrated that she's putting in the work to be a good listener and make space for someone else but isn't feeling heard in return.

[23:07] Cristy shares how in her work conversations, she's been able to talk less and listen to other perspectives and solutions, which has built trust between her and her team.

[25:30] Ron asks if Cristy can do the same at home - if a family member has an alternative solution or perspective, is she open to it, or is she set on her plan from the get-go?

[28:00] How do you get people to reciprocate your time and energy in communicating with them? Sometimes you have to ask for what you need!

[29:18] Cristy shares that, in her family, talking excessively is a way of coping with awkward silences or uncomfortable situations.

[31:25] It's important to tell the people you want to build better communication habits with that this is something you're working on and that you would appreciate their help and feedback.

Asking for help defuses defensiveness.

[32:40] Start with small experiments. Choose one small action that aligns with your goal on a micro-level.

[34:45] No experiment is complete without collecting the data. Is this something you want to implement long-term? You don't know until you collect the data. How do you do it? Ron explains.

[36:40] Cristy talks about overthinking conversations before they happen, sometimes leading to avoiding them altogether.

[37:30] Ron suggests facing uncomfortable conversations by starting with a question (ideally one that doesn't put the other person on the defensive.)

[38:10] Make conversations safe. If you are known by your family or loved ones to push your agenda, the work is on you to change that dynamic over time. 

[39:20] The fastest way to defuse an argument is to Own. Your. Stuff. Admit your shortcomings and ask for constructive feedback to improve.

[42:00] It's important to make people feel safe to communicate freely with you. Otherwise, they won't say what they really think. How do you do that? Keep your opinions and reactions to yourself.

[43:20] When it feels like you're dealing with the same issue over and over again, give yourself grace. We deal with problems at different levels, so sometimes it feels like they're repeating. But, in reality, you are dealing with the issue at a deeper level, with more maturity and insight each time.

If you love the podcast, please consider rating and reviewing the show! This helps us support more people like you to bring presence into their doing. Click here, scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let us know what you loved most about the episode!

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Have you ever gone through a transition that forced you out of your comfort zone, clawing at the walls, kicking and screaming? 

What about right now? Are you experiencing something you'd really rather not be going through and wondering, "Why me??"

Sometimes, situations come up that hit us like a two-by-four to the face making us question what on earth we did to deserve them.

So, to prevent experiencing uncomfortable or painful things, we might avoid making any moves at all. If everything stays the same, big bad change can't come in and wreck everything, right?

Well, my friend, that is called resistance. And it doesn't serve you. In fact, it often creates the very experiences you're desperately hoping to avoid.

I'll give you an analogy to really drive the point home.

You know when you feel nauseous and you have the horrible sensation that you're going to throw up? Everything in you wants to avoid that because it sucks while it's happening. I mean, it's the worst, right?

BUT, once it's over, you feel instant relief. Somehow the room is brighter, your steps are lighter, you can smile, maybe even drink something. 

That's what change is like! It sucks while you're anticipating it, sometimes it sucks while it's happening, but when you make it through, everything is different in the best way.

Accepting what you can't control and embracing unexpected detours can hugely influence what you fear and reveal that you have waaay more power than you think. If you can get through a tough time, there's sweet relief on the other side, and as an added perk, you're more resilient, courageous, and wise too!

This week, in episode four of the podcast, we explore the possibility that uncomfortable change is not only happening for you but is compounding deep personal growth in a short period of time.

Full Show Notes

Episode #4: Change Is Happening FOR You

[00:45] Ron talks about where the term "Change Evolutionist" comes from and defines the process of change.

[02:30] Change that comes from the head ("I should") versus change that comes from the heart ("I want").

[04:30] Making changes in moments of motivation. Why do these changes fizzle out over time?

[05:35] Reversing the process - making incremental changes over time that eventually lead you toward your end goal.

[6:35] Using experiments to find areas of resistance.

[7:10] You may think you need a certain change, but it might not always be the one you need.

[8:20] Resisting the changes that you know you should make but don't necessarily want to do.

"Discipline is choosing between what you want NOW and what you want MOST." Abraham Lincoln.

[12:23] The brain says "You should" and meets the most resistance, but the heart says "I want," which is immediately met with less resistance.

[13:30] What happens if you take away the guilt from all the things you "should" be doing that you aren't?

[15:40] Change that's motivated by societal shame meets with great resistance.

[17:10]  Allow the heart to ask, "Why does this need to change?" and make space for being, accepting, and appreciating.

[17:50] The ego's role in making changes for the wrong reasons.

"Just who you are, as you show up, is enough."

[20:33] Don't feel pressured to make big changes right away. Create little experiments to test what changes are necessary and how you feel about making them. Then, collect the data.

[22:50] Change is like fear - when you confront it, it's less scary than you imagined it to be.

[23:35] Ron talks about how a divorce several years ago helped him understand that devastating and life-altering changes can be beneficial and serve as catalysts for deep personal growth, creating a rich and more meaningful life.

[26:40] Ron talks about how he helps people go from real despair to finding hope again by recognizing the role of the ego in their suffering and facing an irrational fear of change.

[30:15] Janelle talks about facing the fear of not being capable of navigating change successfully.

[31:30] Life experiences sometimes dish you up what you need - Janelle talks about a forced career change in her late forties that she was able to embrace fully.

[34:00] Are unexpected changes your purpose nudging you? Are you more willing to try new things when you're pushed out of your comfort zone?

[34:38] Why is this happening for you?

"He delivers the afflicted by their affliction and opens their ear by adversity." Job 36:15 

[36:30] Trust that something great is in store. Accept that you are safe and things you cannot see are working on your behalf.

[37:25] Ron gives a hallway/door analogy you don't want to miss! 

If you love the podcast, please consider rating and reviewing the show! This helps us support more people like you to bring presence into their doing. Click here, scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select "Write a Review." Then be sure to let us know what you loved most about the episode!

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In this week's episode of the podcast, Ron and I talk about letting go - what it means to let go, when to do it, and how to know when you need to give yourself a little more time to "process."

"Letting go" is a broad term for shedding whatever isn't serving you, like:

🔷 Expectations

🔷 Personal preferences

🔷 Hurt feelings

🔷 Fear

🔷 Grudges

🔷 Guilt

🔷 Shame

🔷 Toxic relationships

🔷 Limiting beliefs about yourself

🔷 Time-sucking habits 

I'm not an expert at letting go by any means. Just ask my husband. He'll tell you (with a very dramatic eye roll) that I'm VERY particular about a LOT of things. He claims my life motto is "If some is good, more must be better." So, yeah. I guess you could say I'm not the poster child for "letting go".

But, within the last year or so, I've experimented with letting some stuff go. I try not to take things personally and I don't beat myself up mercilessly when I screw up. Not everything has to be done my way and to my standards. I'm gradually making room for things outside of my preferences.

It's a process.

What about you? What are some things you'd like to let go of?

I probably don't have to tell you that holding on to stuff that doesn't serve you (like negative feelings, possessions, a job you hate, or a toxic relationship) negatively impacts your well-being and really hinders your personal growth. 

By letting go, you detach from the clutter in your brain and let your heart lead the way.

Through greater self-awareness, you can care a little less about the outcomes you can't change and help yourself move past your pain. In time, you'll feel more comfortable listening to your heart and start to feel profound peace.

Full Show Notes

[1:00] Why letting go is so important (when you're ready).

[2:18] Michael Singer: You're either clinging or resisting.

[2:30] Letting go is accepting that whatever is happening is happening.

[3:15] Ron uses the analogy of a trapeze artist learning to trust.

[4:30] Letting go and surrender - are they the same thing?

[6:05] Ron talks about being a control freak (passive-aggressively)

[8:28] Using fear to control the outcome and preparing for a worst-case scenario.

[9:20] Sometimes what we imagine will happen never does, and we waste energy worrying over nothing.

"What you pay attention to you get more of."

[10;35] Ron shares a client story about an older couple paralyzed by fear for over three years by the pandemic.

[11:40] Why people are comfortable with their fear.

[12:05] How fear can make you crazy if you don't learn to let go.

[13:20] Adapting to fear, even though it's miserable.

[14:35] "What's the worst that will happen if I let this go?"

[16:10] Low-risk experiments that require minimal discomfort.

[17:00] Controlling people bear all the responsibility.

"If you hold on or you let go, in some circumstances, the outcome is the same, but the tension and the pressure you carry by holding on destroys your health." 

[18:00] Breaking relationship patterns by doing something different and experiencing different outcomes.

[19:45] Needing to control can be crazy-making. Janelle talks about wanting a clean house, but her family isn't on board.

[22:50] Taking things personally makes it hard to let things go.

[24:30] It's not always the right time to let go.

[25:19] Letting go when you're not ready will produce more traumatic responses.

[26:45] Anger is a sign that something is wrong and you need to pay attention to it. Learn how to harness it and use it to build a better life.

[29:20] How does it feel when you're repressing your feelings versus letting them go?

[30:47] Janelle talks about a relationship that she thought she had dealt with already, but feelings keep resurfacing.

[32:20] Forgiveness is a way to let go, but it has many layers. Sometimes you need to forgive them at different levels as you grow.

[37:17] Some experiences and relationships create trauma that is only overcome in stages.

[38:40] Even though it feels personal, you don't have to take it personally. Someone is projecting their problems onto you.

[40:13] When you feel you've grown past the dysfunction of the relationship but the other person has not, there are numerous opportunities to let go.

[40:50] Using low-risk experiments can change the predictable responses within a relationship.

[41:40] Letting go slowly and in stages helps the process not feel so overwhelming.

"Your process of letting go can be long or short, it doesn't matter. The fact that you're in the process of letting go is the win."

[44:00] You don't have to let things go in a way that makes you feel unsafe. Don't be afraid to ask for support.

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