IDK about Rules

Topics: 

• A Few types of Rules
• A bit on Laws of Man and Nature
• “Shoulds” Cognitive distortion

Meat & Potatoes: 

• Rules: start at home, in the family, then friends, work/school, any groups large/small, city, county, state, nation, international, and one day interstellar. People break rules based on their own internal moral compass. Guilt/Regret useless IMO, doesn’t keep people from doing bad things. 
• Laws of Nature are more like mathematical observations fairly consistent over time. Check out folks like Gauss, Couloumb, Franklin, or my favorite: Neil deGrasse Tyson (https://www.haydenplanetarium.org/tyson/). 
• Laws of Man: These are the laws on the books that governments and/or religions both small and large fall back on to keep law and order in terms of living in a “civilized” society. 
• Cognitive Distortion: Shoulds or Oughts can be rules in our own minds that can be helpful, harmful, or neutral...just like all the aforementioned rules. The reason questioning the shoulds that pop into our mind can be helpful is because to my knowledge, humans cannot control the FIRST thought/feeling/sensations that we sense. We can most certainly control the second once we learn how, easier said than done or I wouldn’t have a job. My tip of the day is to ask oneself “Right now, what needs to be done about this?” If the answer is nothing, then the mind can chill. Typically low self-esteem and increased anxiety can occur if we shoulda/coulda/woulda in the past or attempt to rule the future with predictions ad nauseum. 

Told Ya: 

• Where we get rules: HUMANS
• Measurable laws of nature and arbitrary rules of man.
• How our own internal experience can be distressing if we’re unaware of the rules we live by in terms of the stories we tell ourselves. 

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References:

https://brenebrown.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/03/87Emotions_Social-1.jpg

Brown, B. (Host). (2020, March 27). Brené on Comparative Suffering, the 50/50 Myth, and Settling the Ball. [Audio podcast episode]. In Unlocking Us with Brené Brown. Cadence13. https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-on-comparative-suffering-the-50-50-myth-and-settling-the-ball/

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/hubris

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Reference: 

Chapman, G. D. (2010). The five love languages.

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Reference:

https://e360.yale.edu/features/ecopsychology-how-immersion-in-nature-benefits-your-health#:~:text=These%20studies%20have%20shown%20that,reduce%20anxiety%2C%20and%20improve%20mood

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Reference:

by Marsha M. Linehan 

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References: 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-modern-brain/202207/if-serotonin-doesnt-cause-depression-then-what-does#:~:text=Inflammation,-The%20planet%20had&text=In%20the%20world%20of%20neuroscience,linked%20to%20worse%20brain%20function

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References:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/science-choice/202104/6-ways-music-can-alter-our-state-mind

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References: 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/201005/how-deal-attention-seeking-behaviors

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-art-and-science-aging-well/201612/understanding-attention-seeking-and-confrontation

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Reference:
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders Fifth Edition (DSM-5)


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References: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/lab-real-world/202106/6-tips-increasing-social-support

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