Igbo, Queer, and Unfiltered

Coming out in mainstream LGBTQIA+ spaces is often talked about as a hopeful, even celebratory moment. But for gay Africans the reality is far more complex. The fear is different. The stakes are different. The community pressure, the family expectations, the financial dependency, the risk of losing everything. None of that gets talked about enough.

In this episode, I get into the internal journey that happens long before the conversation, how to do a genuine risk assessment before you come out, what to think about when you are ready to have the conversation. What to do when it goes wrong. Why waiting is not the same as hiding.

If you are a gay African person who has been through this or is still trying to figure out when and how, this episode is for you. You are not alone and your truth is yours.

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Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

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I'm discussing Kito this week. The practice of luring, trapping and extorting gay men in Africa using fake dating profiles. It is one of the most urgent crises facing gay men in Africa, and it does not get nearly enough attention.

I cover what kito is, who is behind it, why the law makes it almost impossible for victims to speak up and practical steps you can take to protect yourself.

If you are a gay man this episode could save your life. Share it with someone who needs to hear it.

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Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

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https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

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www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

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As we celebrate Episode 80, I'm saying things out loud that gay African men have never been allowed to say in our families, churches, queer spaces, or even to each other. I'm not going to sugarcoat the damage the church caused; I'm naming it. Eighty episodes of refusing silence.

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Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

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www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

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This episode discusses the real numbers on homosexuality in Africa, the research that has been done, what it has found, and the big difference between what African governments say and what the numbers show.

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Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

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Listen to my podcast:

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The same church that calls gay love sinful has covered up abuse, ignored domestic violence and blessed corrupt politicians. This episode is the conversation they do not want you to have. Charles grew up in the church, and he knows the difference between an institution that is morally serious and one that is just morally selective.

Follow Charles on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and YouTube at myownkindofrunway. Igbo Queer and Unfiltered is available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and everywhere you listen.

Stay Connected

Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

Visit my website:

www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

Instagram:

https://instagram.com/myownkindofrunway?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==

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African leaders call homosexuality a Western import. Same-sex relationships existed across Africa long before colonization. The criminalization came on the ships. The laws, the church, the rhetoric, all of it has a colonial fingerprint.

Follow Charles on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and YouTube at myownkindofrunway. Igbo Queer and Unfiltered is available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and everywhere you listen.

Stay Connected

Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

Visit my website:

www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

Instagram:

https://instagram.com/myownkindofrunway?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==

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Shop My Looks:

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This episode covers what most gay African men bring into dating before the first date even happens. Why secrecy does something very specific and very damaging to a relationship, how to navigate the family question honestly, what it looks like to date across cultures and what that requires from a partner. What a healthy relationship actually looks like for a gay African man who has spent years being told he does not deserve one.

Follow Charles on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and YouTube at myownkindofrunway and The African Gay Igbo Vlog Channel on YouTube. Igbo Queer and Unfiltered is available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and everywhere you listen.

Stay Connected

Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

Visit my website:

www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

Instagram:

https://instagram.com/myownkindofrunway?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==

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What it costs to grow up with conditional love, how to survive and rebuild even when families do not support you, and the particular grief that a queer African child experiences when their family turns to religion instead of them.

Follow Charles on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and YouTube at myownkindofrunway and the African Gay Igbo Vlog Channel. Igbo Queer and Unfiltered is available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and everywhere you listen.

Stay Connected

Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

Visit my website:

www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

Instagram:

https://instagram.com/myownkindofrunway?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==

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For the most part, Nigerian men are not as straight as they act. This is not about outing anyone. This is about culture, behaviour, performance, and the very specific way that heterosexuality works in the Nigerian society as a costume that many men wear because they can't imagine being anything else. Igbo Queer and Unfiltered is a podcast by Charles, a gay Igbo man from Nigeria, talking about queerness, identity, culture, faith, family, and everything in between with honesty and no apology. Subscribe and leave a review if this episode landed with you.

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Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

Visit my website:

www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

Instagram:

https://instagram.com/myownkindofrunway?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==

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There is an unspoken rule in the queer community that by a certain age, you should know who you are. Come out young. Date young. Build your identity young. And if you didn't, if you lived your twenties and thirties avoiding shame, fear, religion, or family pressure, then you somehow missed your window.This episode pushes back against that lie.Charles talks about the myth of the gay timeline, why late bloomers are not failures, the ageism that exists in queer culture, and why reinvention is available at any age. This is for every queer person who has ever looked at their life and felt like they were running behind schedule.You are not behind. You were surviving. There is a difference.

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Welcome to myownkindofrunway, a place for unapologetic conversations, fashion, and queer joy.

Watch more videos:

https://youtube.com/channel/UC9jWWJwF_KzrY14FR9DXO4A

https://youtube.com/@igboqueerandunfilteredpod?si=0GZV68iNaWT5BumS

Visit my website:

www.myownkindofrunway.com

Listen to my podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/5EjOLr2ilFBqhaXkoTK72a

Instagram:

https://instagram.com/myownkindofrunway?igshid=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA==

TikTok:

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Shop My Looks:

https://www.shopLTK.com/explore/myownkindofrunway

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Let’s Talk