Christian joined me this week to discuss his emotional myth. He chose myth number two - letting others know I am feeling bad is a weakness. He comes at this from a therapist's perspective and talks about how this shows up in his office in his clients.

He identifies chronic distress, i.e., resentment, fear, and anxiety centered around our need to be good vs. the acute pain of acknowledging, admitting, and leaning into making the changes necessary to live an authentic life.

The felt sense is the experience of embodying all parts of us, including the "bad" feelings often considered a sign of weakness. This means we must feel, experience, and bring them consciousness. Christian gives us insight into why this is important and necessary.

You will learn a lot from this one.

I've finally reached Radical Acceptance. This is the practice of fully accepting the reality of a situation, no matter how painful or difficult it may be. It involves acknowledging and embracing the present moment without judgment or resistance. By accepting things as they are and creating space for change and healing, we can reduce emotional suffering.

Within Radical Acceptance, there are empowering practices. The first is WILLINGNESS. This is about fostering an open and adaptable mindset, where we engage with our emotions and experiences without judgment. In DBT, willingness empowers us to take action and pursue our goals, even in discomfort. It builds resilience and the ability to navigate challenges with flexibility, making us feel more in control and resilient.

The other one is EVERYDAY ACCEPTANCE. This concept emphasizes the importance of accepting day-to-day experiences and emotions as they arise. It involves recognizing that not everything needs to be fixed or changed immediately. Everyday acceptance encourages individuals to find peace with their current circumstances, allowing for a more balanced emotional state and reducing anxiety about the future.

These concepts in DBT help us develop a healthier relationship with our emotions and experiences, ultimately leading to greater emotional regulation and well-being.

Join me this week for an informative podcast about distress tolerance skills. This week, I talk about how the skills IMPROVE, self-soothing, and using pros and cons to make decisions from Wisemind are essential tools for managing overwhelming emotions effectively.

IMPROVE stands for imagery, meaning, prayer, relaxation, one thing or step at a time, vacation, and encouragement. Utilizing these skills can enhance the ability to cope with distress and prevent impulsive or harmful behavior. The pros of developing these skills include improved emotional resilience, reduced stress, and increased self-control.

However, the potential con might be our initial challenges and discomfort in confronting distress. The benefits of mastering distress tolerance skills outweigh the possible drawbacks, making it a valuable tool for improving mental wellness and emotional stability.

Kylee joined me this week to discuss her emotional myths. She chose two that she identifies as problematic, but she does not struggle with them herself. Kylee talked about how parenting has given her a new perspective on how vital emotional validation is. She talks about the scripts she uses when she no longer has the capacity for genuine connection with her kiddos. She also told us what she tells herself when she's in a state of fight or flight as a result of parental or relationship overwhelm. It's a good one.

Emotional Myths Worksheet

I've returned to DBT, and in this episode, I discuss the ACCEPT skills for coping with crisis emotions and creating safety for extreme situations. Whether you struggle with regulating your emotions or want to improve your overall mental health, this episode will provide valuable insights and tools to help you live a more balanced and fulfilling life.

Annie joins me this week to discuss her emotional myth(s). She chose two and then we discussed them and how they impact her. Using the framework of non-violent communication she discussed how painful emotions are an expression of unmet needs, which tied nicely into her chosen myths.

Give it a listen. You will not be disappointed.

It's been a busy week, and I've not been able to interview or invest enough time in reviewing distress tolerance, so ... I'm recommending a couple of books.

Nonviolent Communication: Create Your Life, Your Relationships, and Your World in Harmony with Your Values

(Audible)

The Anatomy of Peace, Fourth Edition: Resolving the Heart of Conflict

Join Carson and me as we discuss another emotional myth. Carson chose number 19. She was thoughtful and brought attention to the idea of embodiment, which is the way

In this episode, I discuss crisis skills and distress tolerance in dialectical behavior therapy. If you have a manual look at the handouts. They are good guides for many of these exercises. I talk about effective rethinking and paired relaxation techniques, as well as the STOP skill for managing overwhelming emotions. Also take note of the TIP skill, which involves changing body chemistry through cold water, intense exercise, paced breathing, and paired muscle relaxation.

Paired Muscle Relaxation Script

Effective Rethinking & Paired Relaxation: Step By Step

Sometimes, our emotions get the best of us. It might be that we are struggling to keep things together - depression, anxiety, and other symptomologies overwhelm us, and we don't handle the distress very well. We use maladaptive coping strategies that work in the short term but will not over the long term. Additionally, there are some periods of our lives where keeping our emotions in check is much harder than at other times. Distress tolerance is a set of skills that can help support us during these times.