Inside Job

We cover three things we think of truths when it comes to workplace relationships in pain:

• Some workplace conflict is inevitable
• Sometimes we work with people who act like jerks
• Sometimes we act like jerks

The workplace is full of decisions, tradeoffs, pressures and high stakes, and many of these are associated with strong emotions, and sometimes, conflict. When conflict happens, many of us feel hurt, disappointed, even targeted, which rubs up against our human desire to have harmony and get along at work. Is that always the goal? We ask our clients (and ourselves) about the continuum between being respected and liked (or feared and loved – thank you, Michael Scott). We argue that conflict can be healthy and productive, as long as it stays respectful, safe and there's a pathway forward.

Second, we offer that when we face bad behavior from others at work, it's not enough to follow the guidance to give courageous feedback…That may be a best practice, but it doesn't adequately offer us a way to make sense of being on the receiving end of someone else's outburst. Nayla offers a story that illustrates a few ideas for sense-making of a workplace relationship gone wrong. We explore the idea of taking ourselves out of the leading actor role in someone else's movie, and how to explore the limits of our responsibility for someone's else actions.

Finally, we admit that each of us has been the jerk at work. These are times when we believe we bear 100% responsibility for our actions (even though that's difficult at times!) and that the inside job is about getting better at anticipating, understanding and managing our own behaviors. We explore ideas of body awareness and reflection, and the role of a honest apology when it's necessary.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

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We can agree that having friends at work helps us stay engaged, productive and satisfied with what we do all day. It's so important that the most commonly used employee engagement survey asks respondents to weigh in on having a best friend at work. We discover new opportunities, get valuable – often unfiltered feedback – and grow because of our true connections on the job. Friendships at work build culture, lead to great collaboration and innovation, and fun!

And yet… friendship at work can be complicated. We explore this in greater detail in our latest episode.

Eric leads the exploration of how shared accountability can be fuel for friendship at work, and also a source of potential tension. Whether we have a manager/employee relationship or are both accountable for a piece of work we've all been in situations where conscious creation of ground rules and conversation about 'how we're going to do this' can help protect the relationships with the people we care about in the office.

Nayla wonders how information and shared experience can be the building blocks of friendship, but also risky terrain when the impulse to share news with a friend can be costly down the road. We talk about how self-awareness and self-regulation can help us make decisions that are in line with the friend we want to be at work – taking care, anticipating the impact of our actions, and doing right by those we call our friends.

In line with our philosophy, we think friendship at work is a great way to explore the inside job. Acknowledging that we've all made missteps we encourage our listeners to really define the kind of workplace friend they want to be, the kind of friendship they want to have, and to take deliberate action in that direction.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

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In this episode we talk about the concept of a Personal Board of Directors (or a personal committee) – the group of influential teachers, managers, friends and colleagues (even heroes) who offer us a new way of exploring, managing and shaping the decisions we make as leaders and humans. We also offer the ideas that our Boards are comprised of people we know, and also people we've never met, as well as teammates, kids and other people in our lives.

Eric talks about a former manager, John Hickson, to whom one of our favorite lines: "A lack of clarity will cost us dearly" is attributed. John's voice continues to shape Eric's view of creating clarity in crisis and chaos.

Nayla also talks about a former manager, Amir Ziv, an accounting professor turned dean, who taught her the value of letting other people operate in their zone of genius without jealousy or threat, while honoring your own area to shine.

We also talk about the heroes and influencers we have yet to meet:

• Eric talks about Dave Grohl's wisdom and exemplary humanity.
• Nayla shares her gratitude for Anne Lamott's lessons on taking chances with "shitty first drafts" and deciding – rather than succumbing – to worry or not worry about certain things.

We also celebrate the good fortune that has both of us appreciating the insights and counsel of our respective 12-year old daughters – it turns out they are two of the best mentors we could ever ask for.

Finally, we leave our listeners with the guidance to look for those who challenge and support you, who help you see problems and opportunities in a new light, and who can serve as your personal committee of advisors when you need one. We acknowledge that our personal committee or board may need updating as our career grows and our lives change, so we avoid the echo chamber or the trap of a fan base. Eric even recommends printing out an org chart of advisors as a visual reminder.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

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In this episode – the second of two parts on the topic of lies humans tell ourselves – both Eric and Nayla share a lie/story that frequently show up in our clients.

Eric talks about the lessons from a client who believes he is being unfairly passed over for promotion. We explore the myth that great work will be rewarded simply because it's so good (as we define it) and the roles that both performance and potential play in the reward system. We also contrast the difference between what one accomplishes from how they accomplish it, and how the reward systems at our jobs may differ from early in our career to later in our career.

Nayla frequently hears from clients that the job they are in is the "only" place where they can make their career work, and the corresponding belief that going somewhere else means starting over. This leads to a discussion of the difference between technical competencies and transferable skills and the importance of continuing to reflect on the question, "what is the work that you really do?"

We also briefly remind our listeners that you are not the only one who doesn't have it all figured out. We have no problems admitting we don't have much of this so-called life figured out either.

Finally, we leverage the wisdom of both Marshall Goldsmith and Twenty-one Pilots. Don't believe the hype, people.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

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Some of the hardest obstacles we have to overcome as leaders of ourselves are the lies that we tell ourselves. These lies are deeply woven into our belief systems, serve as both detractors and motivators, and are often the cause of many of our blind spots.

The lies we tell ourselves are typically born when we are young, and feature prominently in our origin stories. To understand these lies requires that we examine our beliefs, both past and present, and review where our experiences conflict with our expectations.

In this episode – the first of two parts on the topic – both Eric and Nayla share a lie they tell themselves, discuss where it has roots in their history, and investigate how it has both served and hindered them in their careers.

Eric talks about the belief that he is only as valuable as his accomplishments and how the desire to achieve has always come at a substantial cost.

Nayla talks about her struggle between standing out and being "too much or too big" and how that has led her to say yes when she wants to say no, and to support ideas she doesn't always believe in.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

Let's connect!

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An old Stoic philosophy says, "The only thing you have control over is how you respond to your circumstances."

While that is absolutely true, it's also a deeply unsatisfying response to give someone when they say, "I feel helpless" or "I feel out of control." In this episode of the Inside Job Podcast we discuss the topic of control, and the fact that our clients and colleagues are often struggling with something deeper when they express these feelings.

We contrast the desire for control with the need for clarity, and how having the courage to make a decision – even a small one for oneself – can help provide relief from the pain and agony of helplessness. We also talk about how we all have more influence than we realize, and why it's important to stop waiting and to take action to alter our circumstances.

Lastly, we discuss the concept of discernment and how important it is for us to consciously choose what we put our energy towards. Nayla reminds us that discernment is a muscle, which only gets stronger with practice.

Finally, true to form we talk about the merits of neck tattoos and why we need more Janet Jackson in our lives.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

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In this episode, we address the popular concept of work-life balance, and why it is often misunderstood and is an unintentional source of stress. (Plus you get to hear Eric react to the phrase itself – priceless.)

The bottom line is that for most of us escaping work isn't possible anymore. We discuss why the idea of "balance" is misleading or unattainable, and how it can sometimes even set us up for failure.

We pivot and instead discuss the question, "how do I create the right amount of time and space in my life for all of the things that are meaningful and bring me joy?" We talk about the importance of specificity and boundaries, and why it's important for us to evaluate the choices we are making which compromise the goals we have for ourselves. We also discuss how to design flexibility and options into our lives so we can manage the shifts that occur in our lives across seasons.

Finally, we celebrate the fact that we are now a top 150 Apple podcast in South Africa. Thank you to all of our fans in Cape Town, Pretoria, Johannesburg, and the surrounding areas. We'll come visit – and maybe even broadcast a live show – when we can travel once again.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

Let's connect!

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We'd love to hear from you.

There are at least two truths when it comes to careers: progression is rarely linear, and reality often fails to meet our expectations.

When faced with these truths we can experience frustration, anxiety, and disappointment; we can also feel like our options are limited and are forcing us to compromise or settle.

In this week's episode, we discuss how to make sense of career choices when what we expect and what we get are two different things. We talk about needs vs. values, how to balance short term and long term gains, and the importance of changing the way we process these situations so we can expand the way we make meaning of our opportunities.

We also talk about why it's so important to believe your own story, and why we have to deeply explore the question about what we really want out of our life and our professional hours.

Nayla drives home the point that only you can give yourself the gift of options.

Also, we discuss the horror Eric experiences when finding out Nayla has not yet seen The Big Lebowski. "This aggression will not stand, man."

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

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Actual quote from episode 22: "I think some of the best episodes we have are when we take the leash off of Eric's ego and just let it lead us into the forest of wonderment." He's kind of a big deal (in his own mind). We did that, and yes wonderment ensued -- all the way into the effin' sunset.

In a previous episode we talked about knowing when it's time to leave, and this week we build on that idea by exploring how to exit with a clean break. Spoiler alert: it's so much easier said than done.

How many of us have been guilty of slowing our transition into a new role because we are trying to complete all of our unfinished business in our old role? Worse . . . how many of us have avoided leaving a job because we are trying to make sure our legacy is intact by checking everything off the to-do list and getting the "house" in order before the next person takes over?

In this episode we discuss how to balance our responsibilities to our old jobs (which will be different if we are staying in the same organization or leaving completely) while also coming to grips with the fact that every chapter must eventually end. We talk about the illusion of control when it comes to our reputation, and how much of that is totally out of control once we leave a situation/job/organization.

We also explore our own egos, and highlight the emotional arm-wrestling that happens when we are simultaneously a high performer and totally replaceable.

And, true to form, we quote both Ron Burgundy and Jerry Maguire.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

Let's connect!

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We'd love to hear from you.

At some point, we all think our manager should *know* what we need, what we want, and what it takes to bring out the best in us. But how can they know if we never share that information, or even know ourselves well enough to know what drives us? Our managers may be our coaches, mentors and people we truly value, but they are not mind readers or sorcerers. We make the case that it is OUR role as employees to know what we need, and to talk to our bosses about it so they have a better chance at supporting us the way that is best for everyone.

Inside Job is brought to you by Nayla Bahri and Eric Johnson.

To learn more about us and our work, visit www.insidejobthepodcast.com or email us at [email protected].

To learn more about the ideas and resources discussed in this episode, check out our show notes.

Let's connect!

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We'd love to hear from you.