Intelligent Intoxication

So much of our lives happen by default.

We inherit beliefs.

Eventually we wake up one day and realize:

"I'm managing a life I didn't intentionally create."

Rather than endlessly tweaking what's no longer working, sometimes the healthiest thing to do is pause.

Empty everything out.

Then consciously decide what deserves to come back in.

"I think one of the biggest mistakes we make is assuming that because something came into our life naturally, it should stay forever."

Examples:

None of these are sacred simply because they've existed a long time.

Instead of asking:

"How do I make this work?"

Ask:

"If I were starting from scratch today... would I build this?"

Pause

Don't redesign while you're emotionally flooded.

Create space.

Empty the “Room”

Choose Intentionally

Ask:

Rebuild on Purpose

Don't simply recreate what you've always had.

The second season of life isn't just about discovering who you are. It's about becoming the intentional creator of your life instead of the caretaker of a life that accumulated by default. 

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use support to discern what no longer fits in your life, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

If you've found yourself feeling unexpectedly emotional while watching younger people live their lives, I want to offer you this thought:

Maybe you're not jealous.

Maybe you're grieving

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you grieve what you didn’t get to experience while you were young, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

No one prepares us for the complicated emotions that come with parenting adult children. 

In this episode, I'm talking honestly about the sting of unmet expectations, broken promises, and the stories we tell ourselves when our kids' choices don't align with what we hoped for.

We'll explore the "manuals" we carry about how our adult children should behave, how to separate disappointment from the meaning we assign to it, and why boundaries aren't about controlling our kids—they're about deciding how we want to show up regardless of what they choose.

You can love your adult children deeply, celebrate their independence, and still feel hurt when they disappoint you. 

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you navigate disappointment in the relationship with your adult children, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

When we unintentionally measure our worth by the wrong things, we struggle to feel confident. 

For years, I measured my worth by who chose me—and who didn't. No amount of achievement could outweigh the fact that I didn't have a boyfriend until my third year of college.

Attending my recent 40th high school reunion led me to a question I think every woman should ask:

What are you measuring yourself by?

Whether it's your relationships, your children's need for you, other people's approval, or your accomplishments, the "ruler" you use will shape how you see yourself.

In this episode, I explore why confidence isn't about what others see—it's about the standard we use to evaluate our own worth, and how choosing a better measuring stick can change the way we experience our second season of life.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you intentionally find better ways to measure your progress, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Why Midlife Moms Struggle to Stay Present

Do you find yourself replaying the past or worrying about the future instead of fully experiencing your life right now?

In this episode, we're exploring why so many midlife moms get stuck in regret, rumination, and worry—and why staying present can feel surprisingly difficult during this season of life.

After spending years caring for others, planning ahead, and anticipating everyone's needs, many women discover that uncertainty feels uncomfortable and the present moment feels unfamiliar.

We'll talk about why uncertainty often pulls us out of the present moment and simple questions you can use to help you return to what's happening right now.

If you've been feeling distracted by what was or preoccupied with what might be, this episode will help you understand why—and how to reconnect with the life that's unfolding in front of you today.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you navigate uncertainty with your adult children in the second half of life, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Navigating Difficult Conversations

Difficult conversations don't have to turn into battles. A simple framework can help you communicate clearly while staying connected.

"I've noticed that when we have differing opinions, you tend to raise your voice or yell."

"When you yell, I feel uncomfortable and notice myself starting to shut down."

"Does that make sense to you? Can you help me understand what's going on for you in those moments?"

"Going forward, if you're not able to discuss something calmly, please let me know. If things become heated, we'll take a break and circle back when we can both discuss it calmly."

Most Important: Before initiating any difficult conversation, check in with your own nervous system. If you still feel an urgent need to address it immediately, there's a good chance you haven't fully processed your emotions yet. Regulate first. Then communicate.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you navigate difficult conversations with your adult children, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

No one prepares us for the complicated emotions that come with parenting adult children. 

In this episode, I'm talking honestly about the sting of unmet expectations, broken promises, and the stories we tell ourselves when our kids' choices don't align with what we hoped for.

We'll explore the "manuals" we carry about how our adult children should behave, how to separate disappointment from the meaning we assign to it, and why boundaries aren't about controlling our kids—they're about deciding how we want to show up regardless of what they choose.

You can love your adult children deeply, celebrate their independence, and still feel hurt when they disappoint you. 

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you navigate disappointment in the relationship with your adult children, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

In this episode, we’ll explore how to support our adult children as they move from the familiarity and freedom of college life into first jobs, new routines, and greater responsibility. We'll focus on supporting them with empathy rather than urgency while normalizing the mix of excitement, grief, uncertainty, and hope that often accompanies major life changes.

As our children step into new seasons, we navigate our own transitions as mothers as we release roles we've cherished, honor what has been, and learn to trust what we’re creating now.

In this episode, we'll explore:

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you navigate both your kids’ transitions and your own, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Many women arrive in midlife carrying a quiet longing they can't quite name.

Maybe you've done the therapy, built a beautiful life, raised children, and accomplished so much—and yet something still feels unfinished.

In her book Mother Hunger, therapist Kelly McDaniel identifies three essential needs every daughter requires from her mother:

To be seen, soothed, comforted, and cherished.

When nurturance is missing, we may spend years searching for comfort through achievement, food, busyness, relationships, or approval.

Re-mothering question:

To feel safe, defended, and worthy of boundaries.

When protection is missing, we may struggle with people-pleasing, over-functioning, or allowing others to cross our boundaries.

Re-mothering question:

To be helped in developing trust in ourselves and our own inner wisdom.

When guidance is missing, we may second-guess ourselves or constantly look outside ourselves for answers.

Re-mothering question:

For many women, the empty nest years bring old longings to the surface.

As we spend less time actively mothering others, we may become more aware of the ways we still long to be nurtured, protected, and guided ourselves.

The invitation isn't to blame our mothers or wait for them to change, but to become increasingly capable of providing these things for ourselves.

As our children grow, our role evolves.

We continue to offer:

A beautiful question to consider:

How can I love my adult children deeply while trusting their journey completely?

Healing comes from learning to provide yourself with the nurturance, protection, and guidance you've needed all along.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you re-mother yourself, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Many women live with a quiet belief running in the background:

I'm not doing enough. I'm not accomplishing enough. I haven't had enough. I am not enough.

What's interesting is that getting “more” rarely solves the problem. The goal is reached, the project is finished, the glass is refilled, and the feeling simply moves to the next thing.

The truth is that "not enough" is often not a quantity problem—it's an experience problem.

We spend so much time chasing the next thing that we lose the ability to recognize sufficiency in the present moment.

In this episode, we explore:

Essentialism teaches us that if everything matters, nothing is ever enough. When we identify what is truly essential, we create boundaries around our time, energy, and attention—and we allow that to be enough.

Questions to consider:

Because perhaps enough isn't found by adding more to our lives.

Perhaps enough is found by removing everything that distracts us from what matters most.

Essentialism is not the pursuit of less. It's the disciplined pursuit of enough.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who can use some support and encouragement as you navigate this new season, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

For midlife moms of adult children, our role shifts dramatically. While we still love them deeply, we can no longer protect, guide, or guarantee outcomes the way we could when they were adolescents. 

In this episode, we explore the difference between loving our children and trying to emotionally future-proof them.

If you’ve been carrying sadness, fear, or helplessness as your children find their footing in adulthood, this episode is a reminder that uncertainty is not failure — it is often part of them becoming fully functioning adults. Nor is discomfort proof that they are doomed. 

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who wants to learn how to support your grown kids without worrying about their futures, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory