Intelligent Intoxication

Many women—especially mothers of adult children—have been taught that love means emotional availability at all times.

But there’s a difference between being compassionate and becoming emotionally permeable or enmeshed.

In this episode, we explore:

We also discuss:

I invite you to consider this question:

“Am I supporting my adult child… or am I becoming responsible for their emotional life?”

I encourage you to remember that:

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who wants to learn how to support your grown kids in an emotionally healthy way, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

When our children were growing up, we were meant to be their emotional charging station.

They came to us for:

That was healthy.

But in the empty nest season, many parents unconsciously reverse that relationship and begin expecting their adult children to emotionally sustain them.

Our adult children are not meant to carry our emotional well-being:

When kids are young, dependency is normal.

But adulthood changes the assignment.

Adult children are supposed to separate, build lives, and become independent.

If we need them to emotionally stabilize us, we place a burden on them they were never meant to carry.

This often sounds like:

Underneath is often:

“I need you to help me feel secure.”

That creates guilt instead of closeness and obligation instead of intimacy.

Sometimes what we call concern is actually emotional dependence.

Ask yourself:

If so, we may be emotionally plugging into them instead of standing on our own emotional ground.

Gretchen Rubin shared this idea:

“What if our adult children are only as happy as their least happy parent?”

Your peace gives them permission to live.

Your groundedness frees them from managing you emotionally.

A fulfilled parent says:

“You are free to build your life.

This doesn’t mean becoming distant.

It means healthy emotional responsibility.

“I will always support you,

That is mature love.

One of the greatest gifts we can give our adult children is a parent who knows how to stay fully charged on her own.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who wants to learn how to recharge your own emotional battery, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Key Insight:

Reframe:

The first round wasn’t about perfection—it was about clarity.

It revealed:

Are you trying to create a plan for your next chapter…

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs clarity in regard to your next chapter, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

There’s a quote many mothers have heard:

“You’re only as happy as your least happy child.”

And if we’re honest, many of us have lived like that’s true.

If one child is struggling—emotionally, relationally, financially, spiritually, or professionally—we feel it deeply.

Especially in the empty nest season, it can feel like our emotional well-being is still tied to our children’s lives.

But what if there’s another way to look at it?

Gretchen Rubin shared this thought:

What if our adult children are only as happy as their least happy parent?

That shifts everything.

Maybe our role now is not to keep managing their happiness.

Maybe our work is to become the kind of parent whose peace gives them permission to live.

Your happiness is not selfis - it’s leadership. A peaceful, grounded, emotionally healthy parent creates freedom for adult children.

Adult children need parents who trust, believe, and model emotional adulthood - they do not need a parent who is constantly worried, hovering, or emotionally dependent.

Maybe the goal of motherhood in this season is to become the kind of parent whose life says:

“You are free to go build yours.

Because perhaps our children are only as happy as their least happy parent.

And maybe the work now…

is learning how to become a happy one.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs some support to create happiness in your next chapter, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Do you ever wonder WHY you do what you do?

According to author and speaker, Tony Robbins, there are six human needs that drive all of us — and understanding them can bring so much clarity and self-awareness.

On today’s episode I’ll apply my understanding of Robbins’ 6 needs to the empty nest stage of life during which midlife women are reimagining “what’s next” while mothering adult children. 

The first four needs help us feel emotionally safe.

Sometimes what feels like dissatisfaction is simply an unmet need.

Understanding your needs helps you move from self-judgment to self-awareness.

Sometimes the discomfort you feel is simply information.

It may be showing you what your life is asking for next.

Here’s the link to Robbins’ article:

Tony Robbins: 6 Human Needs

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs some support as you craft a next chapter that addresses your 6 needs, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Arthur Brooks, author of The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose In An Age of Emptiness, is a Harvard professor and social scientist who studies happiness and meaning. 

His formula is:

Happiness = Enjoyment + Satisfaction + Meaning

This gives us a practical framework to ask:

Especially in the empty nest season, this can become a beautiful guide for rediscovering identity and purpose.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs some support as you craft a next chapter filled with happiness, satisfaction, enjoyment, and meaning, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My new book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

Second Season vs. Next Season: Releasing the Pressure to Get It Right

In today’s episode, we’re exploring the subtle difference between calling this chapter your “second season” versus your “next season.”

At first glance, second season can sound intentional and beautiful — but it can also carry an unspoken pressure:

For many midlife women, especially moms navigating the empty nest and redefining identity, that language can feel heavy.

On the other hand, next season feels more spacious.

It reminds us that life unfolds in many seasons, not just two.

This episode explores:

The heart of this conversation:

What would I choose for this next season if I knew I could evolve again?

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs some support as you intentionally plan your next chapter, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My new book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

In this episode, we’re exploring the difference between the life changes we choose as midlife women and the ones that seem to happen to us.

Some changes arrive because we intentionally decide something needs to shift — our routines, our relationships, our homes, our health, or the way we want to live this next season.

Other changes come without invitation: children leaving home, changing family dynamics, body changes, loss, or unexpected transitions that can leave us feeling untethered.

The truth is, midlife often asks us to navigate both.

We may not always choose what happens, but we do get to choose how we respond, what meaning we make of it, and who we become through it.

This episode is an invitation to notice where life is changing around you, where you are being called to choose, and how to move through this season with more intention and self-trust.

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs some support as you navigate the life changes you can both control and not control, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My new book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

So many women feel the weight of the question: “What is my purpose?”

But what if the question itself is the problem?

This episode offers a gentler, more grounded approach.

Instead of asking:

Try asking:

Feeling purposeful isn’t something you find once—

It often shows up when you are:

Purpose isn’t something you chase—

Small moments of aliveness create a life that feels meaningful.

Instead of waiting for clarity about your purpose:

You don’t need to figure out your entire purpose to create a life that feels deeply meaningful.

Start with what brings you to life—

If you’re the midlife mom of adult children who needs some support as you fill your life with meaning and aliveness, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

Thank you for investing your valuable time and energy into listening to the podcast. I’m so very grateful for you. 

If you enjoyed this episode, you can “tip the bartender” by rating and reviewing the podcast. Your review makes it easier for others to find the podcast. 

Don’t forget to hit the SUBSCRIBE button to be notified any time I pour out a new episode. 

My new book Intentional Intoxication: How To Deliberately Distill The Different Life You Desire, is available on Amazon. You can imbibe on the entire book in one, short, intentionally happier hour:

Intentional Intoxication Book

If you’re interested to know about how I can support you in overcoming the habit of escaping or chasing, I invite you to reach out to me by using the email below and we find a time to chat:

[email protected]

For a quick shot of your life’s current level of intoxication, I invite you to complete the 10 Questions on my Intoxication Inventory:

Intoxication Inventory

In this episode, we talk about the three emotional stages many women move through when their children leave home: Grief, Relief, and Joy.

These stages don’t always happen in a straight line. You may feel two of them at the same time, or circle back to one when holidays, visits, or life transitions happen. But recognizing where you are can bring a lot of clarity.

The first stage many women experience is grief. This isn’t just missing your children—it’s the quiet realization that a whole era of your life has ended.

You might notice:

What you might be feeling

What you might be doing

What you might not be doing

This stage is about honoring what mattered. That chapter of life was real, meaningful, and beautiful.

Relief is the stage that many women feel guilty admitting. But it’s incredibly common.

After years of caregiving, logistics, and responsibility, there is suddenly… space.

What you might be feeling

What you might be doing

What you might not be doing

Relief isn’t selfish. It’s the nervous system finally exhaling after years of responsibility.

Joy comes when the empty nest starts to feel less like a loss and more like an opening.

This is where women begin reconnecting with parts of themselves that were set aside for years.

What you might be feeling

What you might be doing

What you might not be doing

Joy in the empty nest isn’t about replacing your children. It’s about reclaiming yourself.

Most women move through all three stages at different times.

You might feel grief when your child leaves after a visit.

None of these feelings are wrong.

They’re simply part of the emotional landscape of the empty nest.

If you’re the mother of adult children who needs some help navigating these emotional stages, I can help.  I invite you to schedule a complimentary coaching call with me. Here’s the link:

Coaching Call with Terri

I’m thrilled to announce my new in-person class:

“Design Your Second Season – Your Kids Are Grown. Now it’s time to rediscover YOU.”

Design Your Second Season is a 5-week small-group class where moms of adult children come together to reflect, reconnect with who they are now, and begin shaping a meaningful and fulfilling next chapter.

In this class, you’ll gain:

The class is designed to be both thoughtful and practical—giving you space to reflect while also helping you take meaningful steps forward.

Details:

Class size is limited to keep the experience personal and engaging.