It's About DAMN Time

Yeah. We’re talking about that.

This episode gets real about what it means to be “good” at sex but still feel disconnected from your own pleasure. If you’ve ever found yourself overthinking, performing, or focusing more on your partner than yourself…you’re not alone.

I’m joined by somatic sexologist Janelle Toussaint, and I put myself in the hot seat. We unpack why so many of us struggle to relax during sex, how being stuck in your head shows up in your body, and what it actually takes to experience real pleasure.

This isn’t just about sex.

This is about presence, control, and finally learning how to receive.

• Why you might be performing instead of actually feeling
• The connection between people-pleasing and sexual pleasure
• What it means to be “in your body” vs stuck in your head
• How mindfulness and everyday habits impact your sex life
• Why asking for what you want feels so hard
• The role of safety, communication, and self-awareness in intimacy
• Practical ways to start reconnecting with your body today

It’s about damn time you admit the kind of sex you actually want.

Not what you think you should want.

Not what you’ve been doing out of habit.

What you really want.

Because you can’t experience it…if you won’t even say it.

This week, slow down.

Pick one moment in your day and be fully present in your body.

It could be in the shower.

Putting on lotion.

Taking a breath.

No rushing. No distractions.

Just you…being there.

Janelle Toussaint is a somatic sexologist and technical product strategist exploring the intersection of intimacy, technology, and human connection. Her work focuses on helping people reconnect with their bodies, understand their desires, and build more intentional relationships.

Follow Janelle:

Instagram & TikTok: @thesextechnologist

Website: https://www.thesextechnologist.com

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Have you ever been so stressed that your body made the decision for you?

That's where I've been.

After weeks of traveling, family responsibilities, unexpected car problems, and trying to make sure my daughter was ready for her next chapter at Xavier University, I hit a wall. My shoulders were tight. My brain was foggy. I couldn't relax. I didn't even realize how run down I was until my body finally said, "Enough."

In this honest, unfiltered episode, I'm not showing up at my best. I'm showing up as I am. We talk about what happens when stress stops being something you think about and starts becoming something you physically carry.

I also share some of the simple things that helped me begin calming my nervous system, from Epsom salt baths and cold showers to magnesium, music frequencies, and something we don't give ourselves enough of... permission to slow down.

This isn't about having all the answers.

It's about learning to listen before your body forces you to.

• What it feels like when chronic stress takes over your body
• Why your nervous system deserves as much attention as your mindset
• The difference between surviving stress and recovering from it
• Simple practices that helped me finally relax
• Why baby steps still count when you're running on empty
• Learning to recognize your body's warning signs before they become a crisis

Try one thing this week that's outside of your normal routine to help regulate your nervous system.

Maybe it's a walk outside.

Maybe it's an Epsom salt bath.

Maybe it's deep breathing, stretching, meditation, or simply putting your phone down for twenty minutes.

Whatever it is, give yourself permission to pause.

Your body has been talking to you.

It's about DAMN time you listened.

If this episode encouraged you, send it to someone who's been carrying more than they're letting on.

Be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and follow the show so you never miss an episode.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

🎧 Follow It’s About DAMN Time: @ItsAboutDamnTimePod

💥 Cop the DAMN University merch right here → Shop now

Getting back on track sounds easy…until it’s actually time to do it.

This week, Jarratt DAMN is joined by returning guest and functional nutritional therapy practitioner Medina “Nia” Henry for a real conversation about starting over on your wellness journey, rebuilding consistency, and why “life be life-in” might be the excuse keeping us stuck.

From stress eating and gym anxiety to meal prep, burnout, accountability, and rebuilding self-trust one decision at a time, this episode is less about perfection and more about finally being honest with yourself about what needs to change.

Because sometimes the hardest part isn’t the workout.

It’s showing up for yourself again.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why consistency feels harder the second time around
• The connection between stress, food, and emotional exhaustion
• “Life be life-in” vs radical honesty
• Meal prep and reducing decision fatigue
• Gym intimidation and comparing yourself to others
• The importance of honoring the baby steps
• Why the first 30 days is about rebuilding trust with yourself

And yes…Jarratt gets called out several times in this episode. Respectfully. 😂

Connect with Medina “Nia” Henry

Instagram: @QueeniesNutrition

🌐 QueeniesNutrition.com

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May kicked my natural Black ass.

After a month away from the podcast, I'm finally back behind the microphone. Not because everything is fixed. Not because life magically got easier. Simply because the storm let up enough for me to start moving forward again.

In this solo episode, I'm sharing what happened during one of the toughest months I've had in a while. Between injuries, financial stress, family responsibilities, and watching my routines completely fall apart, I found myself slipping back into old habits and old coping mechanisms.

The frustrating part?

I knew better.

I've spent years in therapy. I've had hundreds of conversations about healing, mental health, and self-improvement. Yet when life got heavy, I still found myself returning to the same default settings.

Comfort TV.

Sugar.

Isolation.

Survival mode.

If you've ever felt like all your progress disappeared the moment life got hard, this episode is for you.

We're talking about why healing isn't linear, why setbacks don't erase growth, and why sometimes the bravest thing you can do is sit under the underpass, let the worst of the storm pass, and then keep driving.

In this episode:

• Why stress often sends us back to old habits

• The relationship between routine and emotional stability

• What happens when survival mode takes over

• Why setbacks don't cancel your progress

• Learning to give yourself grace during difficult seasons

• Continuing to fight for happiness even when life gets heavy

It's About DAMN Time we stop treating setbacks like failures and start seeing them for what they really are.

Part of the journey.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

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This wasn’t the episode I planned to record.

It’s late. I’m tired. Life is life right now. Then I got a message from my cousin about his daughter graduating… and it got me thinking.

What do we actually say to this next generation?

Not the usual advice. Not the clichés. Not the “follow your dreams” speech.

Because if we’re being honest… we’ve never seen a world like this before.

In this episode, I wrestle with that question in real time.

What can we teach them?

What do we even know for sure?

And why does letting them figure it out feel so damn hard?

This is for the parents.

The aunties. The uncles. The older cousins.

Anybody trying to guide someone… while still figuring it out themselves.

And to the Class of 2026…

We love you. We got you. Even when we don’t have the answers.

In this episode:

• Why advice doesn’t hit the same anymore
• The fear we don’t say out loud about the future
• Letting go of control as a parent and as family
• What support really looks like now
• Why your actions matter more than your words

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

🎧 Follow It’s About DAMN Time: @ItsAboutDamnTimePod

💥 Cop the DAMN University merch right here → Shop now

Sometimes the most productive thing you can do… is nothing.

This wasn’t planned. No outline. No script. Just me being honest about something I don’t always get right… rest.

I went into this week thinking I needed to travel, be outside, create content, stay consistent, and “make the most” of my time off.

My body said nah.

So I listened.

In this episode, I’m talking about what it really looks like to slow down when everything in you is telling you to keep going. The guilt. The fear. The voice in your head saying you’re about to fall off if you stop.

And the realization that maybe… you’re not unmotivated.

You’re just tired.

• The difference between being tired and being depressed
• Why rest feels uncomfortable when you’re used to being in survival mode
• How “time off” can still lead to burnout if you don’t actually slow down
• The fear of losing momentum when you stop
• Why your body will force you to sit down if you don’t choose to

It’s about damn time you stop negotiating your rest.

Not two hours. Not “after I finish this one thing.” Not when everything is perfect.

If you’re tired… sit down somewhere.

Pay attention to your body this week.

If you know you’re tired, don’t push through it just to prove something.

Don’t dress up exhaustion as discipline.

Rest until you actually feel recharged… then get back to it.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

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This week started with TikTok ads about male kegels, beet root, and supplements promising better performance.

I thought I was about to record a “grown” episode.

But the more I sat with it, the more I realized… this isn’t about sex.

It’s about the fact that I don’t know how to relax. I don’t know how to let go. I’ve been “on” for so long, my body forgot how to turn off.

And it’s showing up everywhere.

In my sleep.

In my stress.

In my body.

And yeah… in my sex life too.

This episode is for the people who carry the weight for everyone else and forgot how to carry anything for themselves.

If you’ve ever been the strong one, the dependable one, the one everybody leans on… this one is for you.

• Why this isn’t really about sex or performance
• How being “always on” shows up in your body
• The difference between resting and just pausing
• Why pleasure feels like pressure when you can’t let go
• How stress quietly runs your life if you don’t check it

It’s about damn time I stop treating rest like a reward… and start treating it like a requirement.

This week, don’t try to fix anything.

Just notice where you’re holding tension.

Your shoulders.

Your chest.

Your stomach.

Your breath.

Then do one small thing to relax.

Not perfect. Not deep. Not life-changing.

Just one win.

Take the bath.

Go to bed early.

Sit still for a minute.

We’re not chasing home runs.

We’re stacking small wins.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

🎧 Follow It’s About DAMN Time: @ItsAboutDamnTimePod

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What happens when the job looks good on paper… but feels wrong in your body?

This week, I’m sitting down with Arylle Young to unpack a post that stopped me mid-scroll: “I quit the job everybody wanted.”

At first, it sounded bold. Brave. Maybe even reckless.

But this conversation turned into something deeper.

We talked about:

• The quiet tension of staying somewhere that drains you
• The lie we tell ourselves about “security”
• Why quitting without proof of concept is dangerous
• The difference between choosing your passion and choosing yourself
• Scarcity mindset vs. intentional transition
• Why you can’t analyze your way into entrepreneurship

This isn’t a “burn it all down” episode.

It’s about the internal math.

The emotional cost.

The identity split of holding on to two worlds at once.

If you’ve ever thought:

“I know this isn’t where I’m supposed to be… so why am I still here?”

This one’s for you.

• When “stable” starts feeling like a trap
• Why one of your identities eventually has to die
• The danger of romanticizing entrepreneurship
• How to build revenue before you make the leap
• Why service — not ego — drives income
• What I’m still wrestling with in my own career

It’s about damn time we stop glorifying quitting…

and start asking what staying is costing us.

Find her on all platforms: @ArylleYoung

She helps podcasters turn their voice into revenue with strategy, not vibes.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

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Mentioned in this episode:

Ready to Make Your Podcast Actually Pay You?

If you’ve been thinking about starting a podcast… or you already have one and it’s not making money yet… this is for you.

Podcast System Audit

I grew up in church.

God was always the right answer.

Mess up? God.

Feel guilty? God.

Need forgiveness? Quote a verse and reset.

But depression changed everything.

When my mental health started slipping, my faith didn’t disappear. My trust did. I didn’t feel guided. I didn’t feel covered. I didn’t feel held.

And when I was struggling the most, I kept hearing the same thing:

“You’re not praying hard enough.”

In this episode, I talk openly about my fractured relationship with God.

Not from a place of rebellion.

From a place of honesty.

I still believe in a Creator.

I just don’t know what our relationship is anymore.

This isn’t anti-God.

It’s anti-performing faith.

If you’ve ever felt abandoned in your darkest season…

If your depression made you question what you were taught…

If you believe but don’t feel connected…

This conversation is for you.

• Growing up in a Black Southern household where God was the solution to everything
• How faith sometimes felt like a spiritual reset button
• When depression made trust disappear
• The “pray harder” narrative and how it damaged more than it healed
• Why suffering in the Bible is accepted, but mental health struggles aren’t
• Comparing my relationship with God to my relationship with my father
• Wanting peace more than answers
• The difference between believing in God and feeling held by Him
• Why you shouldn’t force a version of faith that doesn’t match where you are emotionally

It’s about DAMN time we stop forcing a relationship with God that doesn’t reflect where we actually are.

Be honest about your faith.

Be honest about your doubt.

Be honest about your pain.

Truth is not rebellion.

It’s alignment.

You are not broken.

You are not faithless.

You are human.

Share this episode with someone who doesn’t have the words yet.

Let them know they’re not alone.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

🎧 Follow It’s About DAMN Time: @ItsAboutDamnTimePod

💥 Cop the DAMN University merch right here → Shop now

This week I’m joined by content creator, podcaster, and entrepreneur friend Kat P.

We talked about what it really means to be “unfiltered” without being emotionally reckless. How overthinking shows up even when you look fearless online. Why content creation can turn into therapy before you ever step foot in therapy. And how being honest can free you… or burn the whole bridge down.

It’s funny. It’s a little wild. It’s real. And somehow we still landed the plane.

If you’ve ever held your tongue, edited yourself for comfort, or talked yourself out of living your life… this one’s for you.

1. Why both of us avoid going live and overthink everything
2. The difference between being unfiltered and being emotionally reckless
3. When honesty inspires people vs. when it hurts people
4. Content creation as a diary, an outlet, and a form of survival
5. Therapy, avoiding therapy, and what finally pushes you to go
6. Work life vs. real life and hiding your personality to keep a paycheck
7. Internet trolls, clapbacks, and when it’s worth responding
8. The consequences of “saying it with your chest”
9. Doing it for the plot… and knowing when to chill

Kat’s take: stop thinking so much and do the thing. Get rejected. Get uncomfortable. Start over. Live anyway.

Because life is already hard. You might as well enjoy it on purpose.

TikTok: @art_n_shyt

Instagram: @art_n_shyt

YouTube: @thoughtsnshyt3306

Podcast: Thoughts N Shyt

If this episode hit you, send it to your “I overthink everything” friend.

And if you’ve been filtering yourself to make other people comfortable… let this be your sign.

🔗 Follow me on all platforms: @DaWholeDamnShow

🎧 Follow It’s About DAMN Time: @ItsAboutDamnTimePod

💥 Cop the DAMN University merch right here → Shop now