So It seems like there are two kinds of people. Those that are all about the #grind, hustle life and those that are all about the soft life, the let’s chill out and journal, meditate for a while, let’s self care.
]We are pumped with motivational videos like “no pain no gain.” and “no excuses, no sleep till its done” and “if you’re going through hell, keep going. Don’t be a quitter.”
BUT then there's this wave of this newer idea of “nah. Ima chill. Take it easy. Love yourself. Relax.” It’s what’s being called living “a soft life.” It seems to be the other side of that -- I’m going to get my 8 hours of sleep, I’m going to do things that make me happy, the people who don’t want to struggle, they want to enjoy every day and prioritize self care. People also call it living in your feminine energy.
SO Who do we listen to? Our mental health versus or self discipline.
Today I’ll tell my story, share the pros and cons of living in both worlds and how I balance both.
I have always struggled with this.. like I wanna be laser focused but also have my mental health and happiness, you know? I want to have an chill life, & focus on feeling good but getting things done, having big goals, creating your dream life, your dream body, requires discipline, motivation, years of dedication, doing things that aren’t fun a lot of times. They do not get handed to you.
For all my life, until a couple years ago, I was 100% about the grind life. In college, I worked two jobs on top of an internship. And I was a student. I would take night time classes and work on my weekends. I stopped partying and going out with friends. I did all this so that I set my future self up. I didn’t want to graduate and not have a full time job lined up. And I wanted to save enough money to live on my own. I was exhausted everyday, but I knew that I wasn’t putting in those hours for nothing. I was sacrificing immediate gratification for long term success. And it worked. I did save enough money to have my own apartment after graduation And having that mindset for most of my life honestly got me really far. I owe, yeah, pretty much all my career, financial, education success to that.
With my weight, for years I’ve been going up and down and eating whatever I felt like but and going to the gym most days, but taking it easy too. That average gym lifestyle got me, surprise surprise, on average results. Nothing spectacular happened with mediocre work put in.
BUT I lost 20 pounds in 2 months last year, I made a video on that, its because I woke up one day and said that’s it, I’m not giving myself another option. I was VERY hard on myself. But it got me what I wanted. I’m talking about eating a very strict diet, counted every calorie, no cheat meals every week, nothing.
BUT there is a flip side to it. when then pandemic happened and everyone was forced to slow down, everyone was stuck at home and had a lot of free time, I panicked. I realized that I didn’t know who I was outside of working. And the last issue with going HAM and being hard-core grind life was that it was pretty lonely. When you dedicate all your time and energy into your goals, whether it be starting a business, becoming a gym rat, getting a PhD, committing to Youtube channel, being a full time youtuber, extreme saving money, it takes so much out of you, that there’s really barely any energy left to give to others. It almost became toxic productivity. I was wearing my burnout like a badge of honor because I was getting so much done. I was peeking in my career, I had my dream body, I was hitting my savings goals, I was so proud of myself BUT without even realizing it, I was severely behind in other important facets of my life that I really didn’t consider important until recently.
I started going to therapy to get to know myself. I started painting, going horseback riding, and watching more Netflix. I finally opened the door and small- stepped my way into the beginning of my soft life girl era.
