Shake some ass you sexy juicy faggots! The Thot Topics WETland safari is about to embark on the expedition of a lifetime. Cats and cannibals and chemtrails: oh me, oh my!

First, the girls give their take on the "events" that "unfolded" at the Capitol. Spoiler alert: it's literally the most salient analysis you will ever hear on the situation. More importantly, we decide once and for all whether or not it was okay to think that guy in the viking costume was hot.

We also take off our turquoise AND all of our jewels to review the new Lana single-- and make our predictions for the remainder of the COCC era.

Then, AT LONG LAST, it's finally Hammer time: we discuss Armie's alleged cannibalism/blood fetish-- and in related territory, whether Azealia's cat stew was the purrfect fancy feast. Let's go bananas!!

Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Watch this ass clap on Patreon.