Joy@Work Podcast

So the UK is getting divorced from Europe. Rather surprising with the way different age groups voted. Or rather, not surprising. Baby boomers and older and the older Gen X voting to leave, with the youngsters voting to remain. Not only has the vote divided the country in two about Europe, it's divided along generational lines too. Not another idiotic pundit spouting nonsense about maybe this or maybe that, but lets' bring this back to leadership and what it means for you in business? Back in 1975, even I was too young to vote. But, to me, it was pretty clear that the UK never really committed to the relationship with Europe because it kept sovereignty over its banking and currency. When one party is picking and choosing which parts of the full agreement it wants to keep, then there's going to be trouble ahead. The idea of a united Europe is bold. The intentions behind it are laudable and expectations were high that not only would this mean peace throughout Europe, it would be greater prosperity for all. Expectations rise in the negotiation between talent and their prospective employer too The same is true in business. When we hire people, we establish their expectations for the future and both the candidate and employer are "selling" themselves to the other party. Candidates promise sincerely that they have those incredible skills as shown on their CV. Employers might wonder how someone so young had such incredible experience and might question why someone with so much responsibility would want to leave their current position. Employers too, promise great things. The benefits and hours and career progression, training, mentoring and oh such a bright future. There's a little dance as the two playfully seriously negotiate the agreement and eventually the promise to be diligent in making the relationship work, happily ever after. And then reality comes back in to play. One day, the candidate, now staff, seems to have forgotten a particular skillset. Their vast experience of similar problems appears to have been forgotten. Their tremendous leadership capability and excellent people skills have apparently abandoned them and performance takes a swan dive. Their manager did mentor them for a few minutes, and there was a discussion about promotion but the truth was that they wasn't a suitable position and recent cutbacks meant that it would be a while before any new training would be held. What causes talent to leave? Talent expects to be paid a fair amount and equitable with what they can get outside. Well it's not the money. But it is the money! Wait a moment, so is it the money. So many respondents in surveys by the likes of HBR, Forbes and so on would make you believe that talent does not put money in their top five reasons for leaving. And that's true when I've done survey's too. But then you ask some headhunters and you find that the single most powerful thing they do to sway talent away from one company to another is the money involved. Money shows respect like nothing else. But it certainly isn’t the only thing, unless you are seriously under-paying your talent. More importantly for many, there needs to be evidence of equity and fairness in compensation and opportunities. Nothing riles us more than seeing someone else getting preferential treatment. Or someone getting something that they've done nothing deserving. Talent expects you to coach and mentor them as you promised When interviewed on exit, talent mention coaching, mentoring and training as their top reason for wanting to move on to greener pastures. Everyone is promised a personalised and structured career development plan when they join a company with a mentoring and or coaching culture to support it and plenty of training opportunities. The reality is a lot different. So they get sold the same promise down the road and quit, only of course, to find out in a while that they too don’t follow through on that promised plan and support. Talent wants to be working with th

In this week's episode, I'm asking you a tough question: Are you using your talent? If before that I asked you what you want from your life? It's possible that you would be just like the majority of my clients and tell me that you want to be happy and fulfilled. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. And if you are using your talent, everyday, then that it going to be true. You will be happy and fulfilled. By the end of this podcast and article, you can honestly answer the questions I have at the end and decide if you want to leverage your talent in your current role. Let me start with a slightly different question: "Who's bag are you unpacking? A strange question you may think. What I'm really asking is, are you using your strengths and talents at work or are you doing something that is not your calling? Many of my individual coaching clients are going through a transition in their life. More than 70% are going through what we lovingly call a "mid-life crisis". And the saddest part about this is that it's happening earlier and earlier. Gone are the days when the mid-life crisis happened around 50, and meant that a man traded his SUV for a sleek sports car, and the wife for a younger model. Whilst those men may well have been going through a crisis, today it can be at the tender age of 27 and you find yourself in accounting (because daddy was an accountant and it's a solid career.) having studied accounting and now hating every minute of work because really you'd much rather be doing something else. Almost anything else… if only it paid as well. You see, people get trapped. They hate their job because they are not doing what they were called to do and they are not using their gifts. But the money is good enough and the benefits OK enough. And we would really like to do something meaningful, but the pay for meaningful jobs is pretty crap. You’re waiting by the baggage carousel after a long flight. You’re tired from a week of meetings, and your body aches from the airline seat. Your bag appears, and you gratefully grab it and head through the green channel to the taxi queue and head straight to the hotel. Tomorrow is a big day for you. Months of work on that project are coming to a conclusion. It’s taken more than a year to get these people in a room together. Tomorrow is your day The traffic is horrendous, and it’s two hours before you finally collapse onto the bed in the hotel room. The porter delivers your bag to the room, and you open it to unpack your suit, ready for the big meeting. Only your suit isn’t there and your prototype isn’t there. Instead, you find a roll of cash. Some fine clothes and what appears to be the keys for a rather nice car. You call the porters desk and tell them they’ve brought the wrong bag up. Could they please bring yours immediately. The porter assures you that this is the bag that you brought in the taxi from the airport You must have collected the wrong bag from the carousel Someone, somewhere has your bag. You check with the front desk just in case another guest has also checked in having arrived from the airport, and perchance is unaware as yet, of the mix up… No. Other hotels… No-one reporting anything sir… Now in panic you phone the airport. And there’s no-one answering Not that surprising really, yours was the last flight in, and it is now 2am. You berate yourself for being so stupid. For, not checking your bag. For rushing... You have a choice: You could choose to use the fine clothing that is in the bag and wing it through your presentation without a prototype to show them. You’re not certain if the clothes would fit, but with a little squeeze here and there and sure the hotel has a razor you can use. Those shoes aren’t really your thing, but better than the flip-flops you have on now. Of course, you could go out and get some more fitting clothing, somewhere, surely something is open at 2 in the morning. You could get over to the airport and check with lost and found as soon as

Welcome to this edition of the Leadership AdvantEdge Podcast and my purpose this week is to help you confidently make your next meeting or presentation perfect, and not be anxious about it. To do that, today, I'm going to share with you how to do a premortem on your meeting or presentation by asking yourself six questions. On the show notes, I'll share a PDF and a word template that you can download and use to plan your next presentation or meeting premortem and make it perfect. I have a secret to share with you. I have a fear of public speaking. Not because I don't like to be the centre of attention, I love that. No, it's because I'm a bit of a perfectionist. I want everything to be just so, well, perfect. And because of that, every time I have to speak in public, whether in a small group or a large auditorium, I get anxious. Sometimes a little, sometimes a lot anxious. And I'm not alone. Glossophobia is the official term for a fear of public speaking. Most statistics I've seen show between 21% (Psychological Medicine 2003) and 40% (Gallup 2001) of people have a fear of public speaking or performance. Only snakes appear to be feared by more people (in America). What makes giving a presentation so nerve-wracking? It's not just those who give presentations on occasion. Professional speakers and trainers too can get anxious before a presentation. We all have our tricks and tools to get around the issue and I've shared four great hacks you can use in another podcast. But there's another tool that anyone can use to help them overcome any concern, and that's a premortem. You've heard of a post-mortem, where a corpse is examined to determine the cause of death. A pre-mortem takes the same idea but examines the corpse of your presentation before you present to help you prevent its demise. Its purpose is to take your well planned presentation and shake out your own optimistic bias. We need to shake out your optimistic bias? It is estimated that less than 35% of presentation achieve their desired outcome. We have an inbuilt optimistic bias that causes us to ignore baseline data even when it is contrary. We believe in our own skills, abilities or experience and that we will be different and succeed. We believe that they (the audience) will know what they need to do once we present the facts. Gary Klien suggested the idea of a pre-mortem to help organisations improve the success rate of projects. The procedure is simple and I have adapted this to help you improve the success of your presentations. What is a successful presentation? Better still, what makes a perfect presentation? To answer this we have to start with the purpose of a presentation and that is to influence others to change and act. You might be, for example, sharing a new idea with your audience. The change is that the new (without a k) becomes knew (with a k). Now, what do you want the audience to DO with that idea? Surely you desire that they DO something with the new idea? If not, why are you presenting it? A successful presentation then, is one where the audience acts on the information or opportunity. Indeed, that would be perfect. And if they are to act, then we need to be very clear to ask the right questions. Six questions to make sure we successfully get the audience to act. I'll bet that you, like me have sat in way too many meetings that had no actions. You're probably heading out to one today. So if you’re the host, take just five minutes and ask yourself these six questions. Imagine that it is the end of your presentation. You planned it very well but it seems that the audience simply didn’t do what you wanted them to do. It was, in terms of presentation success, a flop. The right questions come from knowing what might derail us. To know that, we have six: What, specifically, did I want the audience to DO at the end of my presentation? Why, specifically, did I want to achieve that? What happened that prevented me from getting it? What would have happened if I d

Why is it so difficult to make yourself heard? When you're in IT, the chances are pretty high that you are quieter than your non-IT colleagues. You are probably more introverted than they are and you might even be regarded as being a little bit quiet. Nothing wrong with being quiet. It has worked for you pretty well. But there comes a time when you need to be sure that your voice is heard There are three things that you can do to make yourself heard Turn up the volume Slow Down Borrow my Confidence Have you ever noticed how a Brit makes themselves understood in a foreign country? That's right, they speak louder and enunciate more clearly. I said that they EEE NUN SEA ATE MORE CLEAR LEE. Do you recall the last time that you were in a busy restaurant and there was one person whose voice could be heard across the room? One of those loud, penetrating voices that cut through all the chatter You couldn’t help but listen in and then you simply could not tune them out. You tried to focus on the person you were dining with, but that voice just took over. Most people speak quietly. Softly. Almost inaudible. Even more so when they are feeling a little intimidated. Say, in a meeting with those more domineering Western style managers, all of whom seem to be vying for the attention seeking prize. It's as if they all have neon signs flashing "look at me! Pat attention to me!" over their heads. Then you get up to present your project update and suddenly everyone finds their phone so much more interesting. When they get up to speak they're brimming with confidence, and speak, up. You get up and speak normally, after all, there's no need to SHOUT is there? So tip number 1 is turn up the volume. Volume in speaking comes entirely from the air in your lungs More air means more volume. So you want to take deep great big lungfuls of the stuff. In through the nose and out through the mouth as you speak. Big deep breaths. Now, you will notice that as you need to breathe in more deeply, that there is a pause in your speaking. It is impossible to speak as you breathe in. (Ok, some people can do circular breathing but you’re not one of them.) As you breathe in you are pausing, not speaking I want you to slow that down just a little more. Pause just slightly longer than you feel is comfortable. Now a little bit longer. And now, as you speak, I'd like you to slow down some more. This is going to feel awkward for you. You think that it is too long and too slow. Not so. Very very few people pause too long and speak too slowly. Those that you know who do, don’t their words just drip with wisdom? Yes, they do. It's considered thought. The chosen words are powerful and most importantly, you heard every single one of them. So as you breathe in through your nose, breathe it deep into your belly and then let plenty of air cross your vocal chords as you speak from your diaphragm (right from that spot just under your ribs in the middle of your torso. Think of speaking from that spot and sending your words to the back of the room and beyond. Tip 2, I've already mentioned and that's to slow down. So as you speak with more volume from your diaphragm, halve the number of words per minute. You'll be aching to speed up. Desperately thinking that this is way too slow. It's not. It's just right. But I'm not used to this. I have a quiet voice. Always have. Nonsense! You yelled as loud as any baby demanding attention from your mum. But when I get excited, I speed up and run out of breath So do we all, if we don’t pay attention to our breathing and pace. Catch yourself and simply repeat what you said at half speed. Don’t worry, they probably didn’t hear what you said the first time anyway, so you won't be repeating something they already heard. Slow down some more. Now stand with your head held high, your feet firmly planted on the floor Your hands dropped straight down by the sides, breathe deep into your belly and out through your mouth. Speak deeply from your diaphragm send

This is a story of two leaders. We worked with the organisation on team leadership because one of their sales teams was "highly successful" and another was "doing poorly, with a very low morale". The organisation wanted us to "find out what's working in [the high-performing  team], fix the [low-performing team] and run a training programme for all the other sales teams to  be as good as [the high-performing team]." Ann, the leader of the high-performing team had joined the company 5 years previously as a  sales representative. She was good at her job and always exceeded her targets. She was  promoted to team leader after 3 years and had infused her own enthusiasm, determination and  will to her team. Her team members were happy, hard-working and also successful, most  exceeding targets. Joe, the leader of the low-performing team had similarly joined the company 5 years previously,  though as sales team leader. Joe's team were, by contrast, unhappy and unsuccessful in  achieving targets. This had been the case for all 5 years. The team members had changed  frequently over, this time, only one member remained from the original team that Joe took over. Ann was enthusiastic when we spoke with her about her success. Saying "It's great to have  such a wonderful team. I enjoy working with them and we're doing well." She went on, "My  boss is great, really believes in me and lets me run things the way I want. I like that, and I try  to treat everyone in the team the same way. When they are down about something, maybe  their kid is in trouble or sick, I let them take time out if they need to, so long as the work gets  done sometime, it doesn't 'have to be 9 to 5. I trust them to make up the time, and they do,  and more!" Joe was belligerent when we spoke, "I have tried everything possible to make these people  work harder and make target. They're always moaning that their kid's sick or they have to visit  the doctor. Always skiving off, taking toilet breaks, going for coffee. If I turn my back for one  instant, they're gone." When prompted, Joe continues, "My boss is pretty useless. Only ever  comes round at the end of the month to [tell me off] for not making target. To be honest, I'm fed  up, I don't 'think I'll ever get this team to perform and the stress is making me sick." There are, of course, several things here we could expand on, but what was clearly apparent  was that Ann's boss believed in her and she, in turn, believed in her team and their abilities, that  she could trust them and that they would deliver. Joe's Ann's boss believed in her and she, in turn, believed in her team and their abilities, that  she could trust them and that they would deliver. Joe's boss, didn't appear to be that  concerned for Joe and didn't help. Joe, in turn, trusted staff to 'skive' and believed that she  would never get the team to perform. When someone else, particularly someone in authority over you (a leader, parent, boss,  teacher) believes in you and your abilities it helps you to believe in yourself and your team.  What you believe on the inside, becomes manifest on the outside. This is usually the attitude  that you portray and the way you communicate. It saddens me that quite a number of clients I meet who have had someone steal their self-esteem at some point in their life. Be it a parent, a lousy teacher or a bullying superior. The good news for many is that it has helped them to turn victimhood into victory. Making sure that they never do that to someone else. But not everyone has someone who will help build them up. And, unsurprisingly, those who, like Joe, tend to believe the worst of everyone, were themselves robbed of their self-esteem earlier in their life and career. The great news is that you can turn it around, by appreciating your own value, your own core strengths and choose to edify yourself. The quickest and most effective way to build yourself up is remarkably simple. Believe in someone else today If, by some chance you

Do you believe that to succeed you just have to be lucky, Or perhaps you believe it's all about your own hard work? No, then perhaps you think it's down to having the right connections. After all, the saying goes, it’s now what you know, it’s who you know.
"Luck" hints to us that all good things are the result of chance. Some people are lucky, some aren't.  Or so the conventional thinking goes.
But the truth is, fortune isn't found in a four leaf clover or at the end of a rainbow. Good luck follows hard work. It may seem that the people who get “all the breaks” do so effortlessly, but when you look deeper, you will find effort, persistence, and determination.
In other words, “lucky” people reap opportunities because they've worked hard to get where they are, not because circumstances have magically lined up to give them a smooth ride.
So often, “lucky breaks” in life have actually come about because you have worked diligently, and often unglamorously, to achieve your goals. In other words, good luck doesn't come to you… you must go to it. And that’s why the key to being lucky isn't chance. It’s good, old-fashioned, roll-up-your-sleeves-and-make-it-happen work.
M. Scott Peck in ‘the Road Less Traveled’ starts: “Life is difficult”. What is most surprising, is that, for many people, this is a revelation! Go to any business networking event, or meet a potential client – especially during the current economic situation and they will be moaning incessantly about the enormity of their problems, burdens or difficulties as if life should be easy.
Perhaps you are struggling on your journey to achieving your ‘success’ and you may be suffering the consequences of one or more of the nine common delusions about achieving success. Depending on how much you believe your ‘success’ is down to what you do (cause) and how much is down to external forces over which you have little or no control (effect) determines where you might be:
It’s impossible!
Particularly for those just embarking on their journey, ‘success’ is a place far away. We may have wonderful dreams about it and a delightfully crafted goal. But as the days, weeks and months go by and ‘success’ doesn't appear to be any closer, many people throw in the towel. More budding entrepreneurs than I can recall have given up – life without a salary is just too tough.
When we've given up because ‘success’ is impossible, we’ll then criticize it. Anyone who achieves success whom we deem less worthy is the subject of our scorn and contempt – “they don’t deserve it!”.
It’s a mystery to me…
If we survive the ‘impossible’ stage, seeing others achieving yet success continues to elude us we search for the secret.
We need to find the magic formula, the silver bullet or the golden key.
Returning to that bookshop to find ‘the’ book that will change our lives. So many promise that you can achieve success in business, life, management, health, diet and they are snapped up.
Business people are constantly looking for quick fixes to problems:
To sell more, we need the sales messages and techniques that instantly convert a cold call into a lifelong customer.
To produce more, we need the unique leadership skills that magically and massively increase performance.
To maintain shareholder value we need to increase profitability by increasing sales and reducing costs simultaneously. Either that or we cook the books to make it look as though we did.
Lady luck?
OK, so there’s no absolute secret to success. Sure we can learn from others, but they didn't really do it instantly, it took time. But essentially, they were in the right place at the right time. No more than luck.So if success is down to luck – all I can do is hope for it. One day my ship will come in. Next year, when the current economic crisis is over. The dice will fall my way.
May as well buy lottery tickets.If you've waited for ‘lady luck’ long enough and still on the journey, by now you may believe that luck only comes to those who create it for themsel

“True heroism is remarkably sober,  very undramatic.  It is not the urge to surpass all others at whatever the cost, but the urge to serve others whatever the cost.”Arthur Ashe

I've been working with a client this past week who's something of a maverick. A rebel. A person who has a different opinion and ideas about the way forward. It's a joy for me to work with someone so intent on making a real difference and not content to follow the way things have been done in that particular organisation for years. Because the organisation is in a bit of a rut. They're not growing, they're stagnating. And before long, they could easily simply die out.
This leader has passion and believes that, with a few changes, things could be different. That there is life in the old dog yet.
But no-one wants to change. Whispering and worry abound in the company, everyone knows that there's problems. That margins have been squeezed, that the market is drying up and they could easily become obsolete. They know this. They understand this. Yet, this leader, my client, is struggling to be heard. Anytime he rises to offer a possible solution, it is rejected out of hand as being too new, too risky, too dangerous. After all, that is not the way we do things around here.
He faces tension from all directions, the company leadership, his peers and the staff: but in different ways that I refer to as Tall Poppy Syndrome and the Madras Crabs.
The old guard resent his new fangled ideas. They see this upstart as a tall poppy in the management team. The younger staff keep their heads down and seem fearful of supporting any proposal that wins such disfavour.
There's a tall poppy in every workplace . They're the people who seem to have it all. Whether it's looks, talent, success or simply they got what you deserve.
Resentment can soon build and, left unchecked, turn into abject misery.
What would you do in the same position? You are certain that you know how to turn things around. Do you push back or do you back off?
When should you push back?
Are you telling them what they NEED to know rather than what they WANT to hear? Then you should push back.
If you know that time is running out, you should push back (heck, if you’re right, then maybe the business won’t exist so you’d lose your job anyway!) I love this phrase about time running out: The broken glass on the ground is from the window of opportunity that was slammed shut.

The broken glass on the ground is from the window of opportunity that was slammed shut.

If you have been entrusted with a responsibility and are having difficulty, it is better that your boss knows about it and has the opportunity to help you rather than fail miserably alone. Push back
Or should you back off
If you’re promoting your own agenda. Doing your own thing. If you’ve said it a couple of times and they don’t seem to catch on… they probably don’t want to catch on…. Back off.
Have I already made my point?

“You do not lead people by hitting them over the head – that’s assault not leadership.” – Dwight Eisenhower

Does my request exceed my relationship?
I was working with a Malaysian company and the Chairman’s son and daughter were in the ‘high-potential’ group I was coaching. And as is quite common when such situations occur, they had an air of superiority because of their relationship with the big boss. Quite often they would both step beyond normal boundaries in their relationship with their direct bosses, which was inappropriate. Not only is it inappropriate in that they were trying to abuse a family relationship, but by stepping beyond the relationship level with their direct boss, they were actually antagonizing their own direct bosses who would often respond by deliberately undermining their power whenever they could. They were not making friends and influencing people, rather they were building a culture of nepotistic favour and would become reliant on positional power in the future.
Now I pushed the matter with them both and the cha

Are you at Cause or Effect?
One of the most common issues faced by people in their lives and leadership is: life happening. John Lennon's famously said

"Life happens whilst you're making other plans."

Some of you are going to like this, others won't like this one little bit. Essentially, you have a choice. A very simple choice. You can choose to create their future, or you can accept the one that you get.
Moving from effect to cause
"But..." I hear you about to interrupt... there are no 'buts'. Sorry about that. Yes, it is true that other people, the world, the circumstances around them may well prevent them from achieving their goal. So what are you going to do about it?
Can you cause the world do something different? There are many things that you cannot change... the weather for example. So the answer is…. overcome the problem.
Can you make another person do whatever is necessary? Neither you nor anyone else can directly cause them to do something, though you can influence them.
"But..." I continue to hear... There are no buts. You choose to act to overcome the obstacle.
In any given situation, we start with a choice. We can act to make something happen, or, we react to the external situation. Both appear to start the same way. Yet, they start a cycle that is either virtuous or destructive in the long term.
Most people who are motivated towards achievement are likely to be in the creative cycle. Those of you who are more motivated away-from things that you do not want, will be in the survival cycle.
When you are at effect, you react to something external to you (or something that you believe is outside your control). Your primary purpose is to protect yourself (or your people).
Your personal values and beliefs will determine what you see as obstacles, both conscious and unconscious and these influence your choice to address or avoid the obstacles.
In the survival cycle, you will try to avoid the obstacles in your path to reacting to the external 'threat'. And, as you try to avoid them, you will adapt or assimilate your reaction to do so. As a result of obstacle avoidance, your result is likely to be less than optimal. Most often the result achieved is not really the desired result. This leads to disappointment and your survival vision... "I have to"..."I must..." in order to survive.
On the other side, you can choose to take action. The desired end result could be considered to be exactly the same thing, and the external environmental pressures could also be exactly the same as for the person who 'reacts'. It's a mindset choice that makes the greatest difference here. In the creative cycle, your purpose is to discover potential and possibilities.
You take action and come across the self-same obstacles. But instead of trying to avoid the obstacles, you address them. Experimenting and testing to find the best way to overcome the obstacles. When you find the optimal way to address the obstacle, you gain your desired result and CELEBRATE!. You have a creative vision... "I like to..."..."I want to..."
Survival cycle strategies that we employ (and we all employ them at some point) are often developed early in life and were originally a creative response to a situation. It worked then and achieved the desired results then. Later in life, we continue to use the same response yet circumstances have changed.
A common example of taking an early life response and applying it in later life that I come across frequently is when a child's parents use punishment as their primary means of maintaining discipline at home and as their primary means of getting the child to do certain tasks or chores. This often means that you may be choosing to be at cause, and using the creative cycle, yet those obstacles, well they turn out to be insurmountable... so you avoid them instead, adapting and assimilating, true, not getting the optimal result but, life really does happen whilst you are making other plans.
Do you want to be at cause for your life,

When we ask this question in our workshops, we are usually met with blank  stares at first. I call them ‘blank stares’ because to be looked at as if you  are completely off your trolley isn’t something I choose to reinforce.
The first response from that first brave soul suggests that there is no need to  influence oneself. Basically, it runs like this: I decide to do something, I  tell myself to do it, and I do it. No influence is required. I don’t have to ask  myself nicely, or threaten myself with unpleasant consequences, or  persuade myself that it will be worthwhile. Really? If we could slow down  the thought processes going on, you might think differently.
Let’s take a slightly different approach. I suspect that you have, inside  you, at least two ‘voices’ - the pro voice and the con voice. The optimist  and the pessimist. The good and the bad. You may have more, you may  not consider them as ‘voices’ - that’s OK, I hope that you can work with  me on the concept for a little while.
 
Let’s say that this is two radio stations, 55.5 and 66.6. The first station on  55.5 is supportive - bolstering your ego, always proud of you and your  achievements. The second, on 66.6 is the doubter, always casting doubts  in your mind, running you down, always suggesting that others are trying  to get you, that you should not listen to 55.5, it always lets you down -  you never realise the dreams that 55.5 suggests. 66.6 reminds you of the  difficulties you had the last time you tried to do this or that. How nothing  ever works for you, that it’s all about luck and fate and chance and that  you just are not a lucky person. If you buy a lottery ticket, you will always  miss by one number at best. That nobody else deserves to win anything  either. Basically, this is a bad voice.
I can see some of you nodding your heads as you read this. Don’t worry,  you’re not schizophrenic - this is normal, everyone has this going on.  Some days it’s like a continuous debate, others, one or both are quiet with  little to say. You know you have a problem when you cannot distinguish  between the voices and which of you is real.
So, which station do you tune into?
Here’s the two stations output for a few common golfing scenarios…
66.6
Approaching the first Tee on competition day:
‘Well, it’s a lovely morning  with plenty of gusty breezes to knock your ball off centre, and a touch of  rain in the air, but very unpredictable whether it’ll rain now or later. You did  some good practice yesterday but you know it’ll all go to pieces today  don’t you? You know that you always screw up on the first drive and  there’s no mulligans today. See your competition today, wow, that first  group were good weren’t they. No chance you’ll keep up with them is  there. Still, perhaps you can just enjoy the game for a change and not  worry about winning or losing - after all you know you’ll lose, so why get  your hopes up? Ridiculous game, I don’t know why you bother, should  have stayed home and cut the grass. be more useful than out here, being  mocked by your friends… oh no, talking of which, there they are, why do  they have to come and watch my first drive. They’ll cough or chatter  just  as I’m lining up, I know they will. Oh well, my turn now, what a disaster,  prepare for the worst and don’t get angry…
First Tee shot: So nicely lined up, but then anyone can put a ball on a tee  can’t they. Now settle down, breath, how’s the grip - that instructor why  did he have to change my grip, it won’t work. Right align my feet, look up,  look down, those people down there, are in my line, why do they have to  stand there, don’t they know they could be hit… calm yourself, that’s  right, may as well get calm now, because once you hit it there won’t be  any calm left, And if you screw up this drive, it’ll all be downhill for the  whole day. never recover, so get this right. Wiggle the bum, yes nice,  settle, legs bent just right, what if my weight shifts before I strike then hit  those

Size Doesn’t Matter; Impact Does When you think about thought leaders such as Martin Luther King Jr., Gandhi, or even Oprah, it’s tempting to conclude that YOU couldn’t make very much of an impact in the world like they have. After all, they are special. They are “big”. I couldn't possibly do what they have done! And while you may not be Mother Theresa or the Dali Lama, you are NEVER too “small” to make a real difference in the world. Because the truth is, you don’t need to be famous or lead an historic movement to have an impact. You just need to do what needs doing in your corner of the world. Too often, we talk ourselves out of taking a stand or making a contribution because we tell ourselves it won’t matter, or that no one will notice. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, ordinary people around the world make the GREATEST impact in the lives of others. You can’t put a price on teaching a child to be kind and empathetic. Or spending time with an elderly person who has no family. Or feeding a single mom and her children who have fallen on hard times. Think of someone you know who makes a real difference in your life. Are they famous? Probably not. When you think of ways you can make an impact, you don’t need to be big, world-famous, or change the course of history. You just have to believe in the value, significance and influence you have on others. And then go out and share it. Do you want to impress or impact people? Making an impact on people takes time and effort to build and maintain a closer relationship. Impressing followers can be done with little or no relationship. All we need is the will to be involved and to leave a memorable impression on followers. It can be done at a distance – a concert, a convention, a conference, heck you can impress on YouTube or Facebook, even a tweet. Influencing followers can be done with some relationship. Influence requires the will of the follower to be involved. The follower must want to be influenced by the leader and this usually involves a connection between leader and follower. Impacting followers can only be done through an intimate relationship. Both the wills of the leader and follower need to be involved. They agree to accountability and growth usually “up-close and personal”. It is time to shift paradigms. Especially for our younger future leaders. They don’t want a “sage on the stage”, they want a “guide on the side”. As leaders who desire to impact others we need to follow Dawson Trotman’s axiom, “More time with less people equals greater impact for everyone.” To truly impact people, leaders need to coach and mentor others effectively for organisational and individual results. My challenge to you is to become a true leader to the people you serve.