Okay, so it turns out I'm sh*t at DIY. Join me for a recap of the last couple of months where I flooded my basement, turned simple DIY into wonky nonsense and hid from the world in my cosy den of indulgent solitude. This podcast is a little catch-up, with a few tales from recent life.

I recently took an Autumnal walk, that reminded me of how the carpet smelled inside a Blockbusters in 2003, and thus discovered that Uber Eats and Netflix have killed takeaway and movie night.

Tune in for that, as well as insights into my new life as a man with a BIMMER, a breakdown of the "softest 75" exercise challenge, and a reading of a bizarre dream that involved helping a 90 year old SteveO shoot a rather cunning stunt.

Helping with a job at Leeds Fest meant revisiting my teenage stomping grounds, only to discover new teenagers rule the wasteland. With increasingly generic (sh*t) lineups, poor music, over-priced drinks, average food choices, high ticket prices and about 90,000 chavs, there's absolutely no reason to go to Leeds Fest, but thankfully for me, a little VIP treatment went a long way and saved an otherwise un-salvageable weekend.

Has Gen-Z lost the interpersonal social connection of being at a music festival? Or am I just an old c*nt with too many opinions? Discover that it's actually BOTH on this week's episode of JMT.

5-star resorts, tourism traps and Mexican shysters; strap in for a long old rant about my experience in the corniest all-inclusive resort in Cancun. Guest starring Russel Brand, Johnny Depp and Michael Jackson.

Having spent 4 weeks in Mexico in 2018, I'd hoped to relive my past experience as a poor traveller, but this time, able to enjoy even more tacos and quesadillas. The bitter reality was being milked of my hard-earned dollars like a dirty, dirty cash cow.

Being used and abused wasn't my only gripe South of the wall, but all-in-all, fun was had and this week's pod is a ride-along for a weird, whacky and outrageous trip to Mexico.

Hands down the weirdest episode I've ever made. Listen at your own peril. It's a short, snotty, horrendous ride through the last couple of weeks.

I'm talking sweaty balls, sick dogs, Eminem, and Mexico. All of these things connected by me having a cold and being a bit delirious.

Honestly, don't even listen to it.

This week I tell the unfortunate tale of Pablo's early morning, indoor assplosion, and all the fun that came along with it.

On this episode I talk mental health, feeling like sh*t (theme of the week is turd), and get right into the incredible tale of "The Father of Film", Louis Le Prince's mysterious disappearance, after capturing the first ever video footage in Roundhay (1888 - The Roundhay Garden Scene).

I'm also starting a new segment for the first time this week where I read out weird, and vivid dreams from my dream journal!

It has been a hot minute. Our camper van was stolen last week, which is why there was no episode.

This ep is just a bit of a catch-up with a few little stories sewn in like:

- getting caught impersonating my sister on the phone to o2 customer service.

- my first altercation with the police when I was 8, after outing a convicted nonce

- an amazonian tribe that got the internet and instantly became addicted to porn and social media

Plus a bunch of other stuff - you know, the usual business.

Let me know if you have any ideas, topics, questions or guests you wanna hear on the pod! Peace x

Joined by long time friend and horse-beatboxer Joe Oakley, from a scenic apartment in Zürich, Switzerland. In this episode we dig into a recent trip to Malta, where we met the real fake John Wick, I became Wendall from The Simpsons and we found the ultimate swimming spot on the island of Gozo.

Tune in for Swiss snacks, digestive woes, and my family's random connection to the Knights Templar.

***This one was recorded on the move with less access to my usual recording set up, so there may be a dip in audio/production quality.

This week I'm joined by Jake Wrigglesworth, Jake Ribton and Louis Sadler, otherwise known as Van Houten, a staple of the Leeds music scene and very good friends of mine.

In this one we talk about life on their recent album launch tour; dealing with polite, but indulgent rats; the origin of Van Houten and loooooads more. We even threw in a nice little surprise at the end too ;)

Had an absolute blast doing this one, so I hope y'all enjoy xx

It's been three weeks since the last episode - jheez! How did that happen? The week's ramblings are a real ensemble of random bullsh*t: my recent psychadelic experience at a stag party; the dog's b*llacks (or lack thereof); how uncool Vespas are; the time I went to a party with Maisie Williams and took a magical p*ss (and saw Tony Hawk from a distance); and a whole heap of other nonsense.

If that sounds like your cup of tea, you're in for a treat.