David Waldman delivers a lovely Friday the 13th KITM Valentine. May everyone you know receive exactly what they deserve.

Speaking of romance, Kristi Noem fired a Coast Guard pilot for coming between her (and probably Corey Lewandowski's) favorite blanket. Corey's security blanket would be a badge and a gun, if he had them. The heated rivalry between Kristi and her non-botoxed twin, Tom Homan continues to rage behind the scenes.

Who would think that Jared Kushner would be implicated in a national security scandal with Tulsi Gabbard and foreign nationals? Yeah, well, everybody.

When John A. Sarcone III was caught unlawfully impersonating a US Attorney, the Northern District of New York appointed the most qualified attorney for the position, Donald Kinsella. That is just about the opposite of what the Trump administration wanted, and they fired Kinsella in under 4 hours, preferring to have no one at any wheel.

ICE says that they are leaving Minneapolis, to places where they are wanted, who will soon learn to not want them. Meanwhile, most U.S. Attorneys and their staffs are bugging out of Minnesota, shutting down the vindictive prosecutions on their way out. The healing will take years, however, as the sickness continues to spread.

The SAVE tool creates confusion and chaos, as it was designed.

Pam Bondi, She-Wolf of the DOJ, will soon present Donald K. Trump with 10 billion dollars, but for now spends her time freeing accused drug dealers.

Budget director Russell Vought found some money nobody needed anymore and put it into an entourage. Jeanine Pirro will be suing someone for $250,000 after a large wooden block leapt into the path of her staggering.