Distinguished Ian Reifowitz, Professor of History and accomplished author, takes an hour off from touring on behalf of his latest tome, "Riling Up the Base: Examining Trump's Use of Stereotypes through an Interdisciplinary Lens" (available at the finest bookshops and atheneums) to talk with David Waldman about George Washington, the Electoral College, Somali slurs, royal decrees by idiot kings, and of course, Trump's use of stereotypes to rile up his base so that he will be envied by all on earth.

Lead by diminutive warlord Greg "Banty" Bovino, thousands of Somali militia… no, sorry, thousands of Anti-Somali militia roam the streets in search of new victims. To meet quota, ICE must commit a number of atrocities each day. This is made difficult by people with morals and empathy, but also when people refuse to play with them.

Don Lemon so far has not been arrested for reporting the news as it happens.