David Waldman drops us off on Friday, usually the calm center of Trump's chaos typhoon...

It's Trump's "grand conspiracy", all right, although it depends on how you define "grand". Nevada's top court revives the state's fake electors case, anyone looking into anything Bill "Slimebag" Pulte does are sacked, while Eric Swalwell gets Pulte-ed and FBI Mis-Informant Alexander Smirnov slips out the back door. Ghislaine Maxwell gets the Perv-a-Lago 6 Star Diamond Deluxe Grande treatment, plus a puppy. Donald K. Trump vows to prosecute and imprison every single person connected to Jeffrey Epstein... give or take.

MAGA accepts only two genders, yet sees pedophilia as an infinite spectrum, with Jeffrey and Matt Gaetz way over on the nicest possible end.

AI-Generated ICE porn might actually be the worst porn one could make with Sora.

Kai Trump proves that she's every bit the golfer grandpa is at the LPGA Tour's Annika tournament. She just doesn't have his caddy, though.

Kristi Noem stars in an ad campaign with an "Avengers" budget… Or... is she just playing hide the salami with taxpayer money?