Remember when we went gaga over Mary Lou? Or maybe a little tyke named Mikey? Well, get ready for us to become the internet’s biggest fans of the most incomprehensible horror anthology ever - 1985’s NIGHT TRAIN TO TERROR - and “The Case of Claire Hansen!!” Strap in as we try to make sense out of the truly senseless!! Witness breakdancing train angels!! An extended riff on Paula Abdul and MC Skat Kat’s undeniable sexual attraction!!Marvel at Richard Moll’s unearthly hairpiece!! Loose what’s left of your mind when you see a stop-motion Spider-man pile drive a mad monk into hell!! Does this sound bonkers?! You don’t know the half of it!! All this, plus a maddening Choose Your Own Deathventure, and we meet a whole new Son of Satan who’s evil enough to hang with the Third Reich but willing to scare a woman to death by nearly taking off his sock!! No, I’m not lying about that last part. You have to see this “motion picture” to believe it!!

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