We Hate Movies

On this week’s special We ❤️ Movies episode, we’re chatting about Royal Rid’s 2000-era action epic, Gladiator! How great of a run did this film set off for Russell Crowe? How easily eerie is Joaquin here? Did Jesse Ventura try to snag an audition along with Sven-Ole? How intense is that tiger sequence? Is the CGI’d Oliver Reed the first cinematic instance of Hollywood going to Tarkin Town and should we be calling it Oliver Reed-ville instead? And how funny is that “They Say No” decapitation? PLUS: How is this movie only one of THREE times Royal Rid was nominated for Best Director? 

Gladiator stars Russell Crowe, Joaquin Phoenix, Connie Nielsen, Richard Harris, Derek Jacobi, Djimon Hounsou, David Schofield, John Shrapnel, Ralf Moeller, Spencer Treat Clark, David Hemmings, Tommy Flanagan, Sven-Ole Thorsen, and Oliver Reed as Proximo; directed by Ridley Scott.

Be sure to catch us in Boston for our final show of the year! We’ll be talking about the film Pretty Woman at Laugh Boston on December 4! It’s our last stop on the road before we hibernate until next year, so we wanna see you out there! Click through here to get your tickets! 

 Make the WHM Merch Store your one-stop shop for all your We Hate Movies merch-related needs! Including new Bus Movie, Night Vision & Too Old For This Shit designs!  

Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

On this very special patrons-only episode of We Hate Movies, we’re chatting about the soggy, unnecessary continuation of The Fugitive, which is a flawless movie, it’s the very flawed sequel, U.S. Marshals! Why couldn’t Wesley be allowed to do some martial arts in these fight scenes? Why is it just another hunt for a wrongfully accused fella? Is this film one of the first ever instances of—hold it right there! This episode is for subscribers only! To access the full episode, along with hours and hours of exclusive shows you can't get anywhere else, sign up for our Patreon today!

Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

“Granny shagger!” - Steve, on Aragorn and Arwen’s vast age gap

On this week’s We ❤️ Movies, we’re chatting about the absolutely magnificent conclusion to the journey, The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King! First of all, yes, we are discussing the four-hour and twenty-three-minute extended edition! How magnificent is John Noble’s demise in this movie? Of all the stuff they could’ve cut from the theatrical, why on Earth did they ditch Sarumon’s big fall? How horny is Eowyn for Aragorn? Was there a funnier way to include Sean Bean in that one scene? And should The Hobbit trilogy be re-evaluated? (Andrew thinks so!) PLUS: Samwise is framed for leaving nothing but Krackel in the Halloween variety pack! 

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King stars Elijah Wood, Sean Astin, Orlando Bloom, Billy Boyd, Bernard Hill, Dominic Monaghan, Viggo Mortensen, John Noble, Miranda Otto, John Rhys-Davies, Andy Serkis, Liv Tyler, Karl Urban, Hugo Weaving, David Wenham, and Ian McKellen as Gandalf; directed by Peter Jackson.

Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

Ever watched the Oscars and thought, “What were they thinking?” Why do some films sweep Best Picture while better ones are overlooked? Why do great actors miss out on Oscars for their best roles? And why do beloved box office hits get snubbed while little-seen films rake in awards? If these questions resonate, check out this new podcast. Search OSCARS… What Were They Thinking?! wherever you’re listening, or click here.

“His Joker has haunted me more than Heath Ledger or Jack Nicholson or Mark Hamill!” - Andrew on Cesar Romero

On this week’s episode, we’re kicking off We ❤️ Movies month with a fun-AF conversation about the super-silly, action-packed, superhero camp classic, Batman: The Movie! How incredible are all of these performances? Between this movie and filming the TV show, was the studio working these actors like dogs or what? Why is Batman stashing all his vehicles (land, sea and air) right out in broad daylight? Why are so many marine animals being obliterated throughout the film? And who were they kidding with that anti-alcohol line, everyone on this set was drinking before noon every day! PLUS: Does Bruce Wayne have the Memento memory disease and that’s why he has to label so many things in the Batcave?

Batman: The Movie stars Adam West, Burt Ward, Lee Meriwether, Cesar Romero, Burgess Meredith, Frank Gorshin, Alan Napier, Neil Hamilton, Stafford Repp, Madge Blake, and Reginald Denny as Commodore Schmidlapp; directed by Leslie H. Martinson.

And it's your last chance to snag your 🎟️ for the replay of our SCRE4M show! Window closes after November 6!

Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

On this week's On-Screen Live, we're reviewing Edward Berger's Conclave, as well as the film we're told will be his last before retirement, Clint Eastwood's Juror #2! We're also going to take a look at the trailer for the new one from Bong Joon-ho, Mickey 17. And like always, we'll be going over the weekend box office to see what's grossing what, and this week in particular, we go off on Warner Bros. and their pathetic handling of this Eastwood release! We also review the 4K release of Alex Cox's Repo Man from Criterion.

Be sure to check our website for all ticketing information on our final shows of the year in Seattle, Portland (Oregon) & Boston!

And don’t miss your chance to catch the replay of our SCRE4M show that happened last month! You've got now through November 6 to snag that show!

Cover art by the incomparable Felipe Sobreiro.

On this week's OSL return, we're going over the weekend box office, reviewing some in-theater genre flicks like Smile 2 and Venom: The Last Dance, and giving a bunch of recommendations for your Halloween horror movie viewing this week! PLUS: The first round of this season's VHS Trailer Game goes down with Chris Cabin hosting his first three rounds as the newly-minted Game King!

Be sure to check our website for all ticketing information on our final shows of the year in Seattle, Portland (Oregon) & Boston!

And don’t miss your chance to catch the replay of our SCRE4M show that happened last Wednesday! You've got now through November 6 to snag that show!

Cover art by the incomparable Felipe Sobreiro.

On this episode, our FOUR-OR MOVIE-themed Halloween Spooktacular comes to a close with a wild discussion about the pseudo-return-to-form sequel, Wishmaster: The Prophecy Fulfilled! How hilarious are all these additional djinn characters? How thinly written is this lead couple? Is their lawyer doing this pro-bono because he’s pro-boner? Was this djinn actually buddies with Caligula? And do the Highlander folks have a case here? PLUS: How hilarious is that fashion boutique decapitation? 

Wishmaster: The Prophecy Fulfilled stars Tara Spencer-Nairn, Michael Trucco, Jason Thompson, Kimberly Huie, Mariam Bernstein, John Benjamin Martin, and John Novak as the Djinn; directed by Chris Angel.

Be sure to catch the replay of last week’s Scream 4 digital show! Both the show and the After Party Q&A are available to stream now through the November 6! 

Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.

On our latest breakdown of The Penguin on Too Old For This Shit, we're chatting about episode five, "Homecoming." Airing back on October 20, this episode's got some wild stuff in it including some prison shivving, an all-new mafia family being—hey now! Too Old For This Shit is a Patrons-only show!

To access the full episode, head over to our Patreon and sign up today! Instantly access all of TOFTS, along with countless hours of exclusive shows you can't get anywhere else! 

Be sure to check our website for all ticketing information on our final shows of the year in Seattle, Portland (Oregon) & Boston!

And don’t miss your chance to catch the replay of our SCRE4M show that happened last Wednesday! You've got now through November 6 to snag that show!

Cover art by the incomparable Felipe Sobreiro.

On the latest edition of WHM Mail Bag, the guys are plugging their upcoming end of year shows while reading letters about things like a guy taking and reusing a popcorn bucket he found in the garbage, seeing a heroic Toronto International Film Festival volunteer absolutely school a rude French Canadian industry representative, a couple of pool guys accidentally pulling into Christopher Walken's driveway, and a father who used the terrifying film, Pumpkinhead, as a babysitter for his own children!

Original cover art by Felipe Sobreiro.