Opening Day – The start to the latest iteration of The over promising and underwhelming Red Sox disappointment tour other wise known as baseball season

Red Sox opening day

Line up                                                                                                 Bench

Roman Anthony                DH                                                          Connor Wong                    C

Trevor Story                        SS                                                           Isiah Kiner Falefa               INF

Jarren Duran                      LF                                                            Andruw Monasterio        INF

Wilson Contreras              1B                                                           Masataka Yoshida            OF/DH

Wilyer Abreu                      RF

Caleb Durbin                      3B

Marcelo Mayer                  2B

Ceddanne Rafaela            CF

Carlos Narvaez                  C

THE ATHLETIC - Anthony and Duran are expected to share left field and DH duties, with Masataka Yoshida perhaps getting some starts whenever Duran is in center field.

Mayer is going to platoon at second base, starting against righties and sitting against lefties (either Monasterio or Isiah Kiner-Falefa will play second against left-handers). Abreu, who’s been primarily a platoon bat to this point in his career, looks to be more of a true everyday option in right field, in part because the Red Sox no longer have Rob Refsnyder to platoon in the outfield corners against lefties.

Rafaela is the only right-handed outfielder on the roster, but Kiner-Falefa played more than 500 innings in the outfield in 2023 — left field and center field — and could go out there as needed. 

Monasterio had an .837 OPS against lefties last season, and Yoshida has a .795 career OPS against righties, and given those options off his bench, Cora said he plans to aggressively pinch hit this season, especially for his catchers. It’s a key reason Wong made the team despite his .129 average this spring.

Pitching Rotation

Garrett Crochet                 RHP

Sonny Gray                         RHP       

Jhan Oviedo (TBD)           RHP

Ranger Suarez                    LHP       

Bryan Bello                          RHP

The Red Sox have announced every rotation spot except Game 3 (Suarez and Bello are really the Nos. 3 and 4 starters, but they’re being pushed to Games 4 and 5 because their workloads were limited in the World Baseball Classic).

There’s a chance the Red Sox could shift Oviedo to the bullpen and use 23-year-old lefty Connelly Early as a starting pitcher. The team optioned prospect Payton Tolle on Monday but kept Early, suggesting he’s made the team as either a starter or long reliever. Early had a 1.59 ERA in 17 innings this spring.

Patrick Sandoval and Kutter Crawford loom as other rotation options down the road, though both are almost certainly going to open the season on the Injured List. 

Bullpen

Aroldis Chapman              LHP

Garrett Whitlock               RHP

Justin Slaten                       RHP

Greg Weissert                    RHP

Danny Coulombe              LHP

Jovani Moran                     LHP

Ryan Watson                      RHP

Connelly Early                    LHP

Tommy Kahnle was reassigned to minor league camp. 

Kahnle signed late in spring training and expressed a willingness to go to Triple A — at least briefly — to start the season, but the Red Sox have coveted him for a while, and it might be a matter of time before he’s added to the roster. He impressed with a hitless inning on Saturday and is scheduled to pitch again on Tuesday.

“I saw a good pitcher the other day, throwing 94-95 (mph) and a good changeup,” Cora said.

36 years old plus 4.43 ERA last year in 63 innings. Career 3.61 ERA. 2023 – 2024 NYY 2.66 and 2.11 ERAs 40-50 games.

Noticeable players optioned to AAA

Payton Tolle

Kristian Campbell - .220 - .340 onbase % 1 HR 4 RBI in 18 games spring training

HEADLINES WITH THE OBVIOUS ONE

 Thank you there Richard 

•we are heading to Cincinnati and it’s not for that terrible skyline chili, it’s for opening day as the Red Sox take on the reds. First pitch is 4:10 

•the Celtics lost at home to the timber wolves for the first time since 2005, simpler times, happier times, ahhhhhhhhh

Next up a home date with defending champs OKC 

•12 games left in the nhl season and the bruins hold the 1st wildcard spot. They take on the maple leafs at home while we record (score update)

•and finally fuck the Florida gators for being the first 1 seed to lose and the team I picked to win the whole god damn thing and the shit I’ve been getting because of it, fuck you too Iowa 

This has been headlines with the obvious one 

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SIMPLEST MINDS

Oldest Trick

New year New Tricks

Whoopty Doo

This ones for Ray

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THIS OR THAT WITH CHIEF BOBBY

Get plugged into the matrix and live a life of ignorant bliss or live with the shitty truth ? 

Build a sandcastle or a snowman ? 

Have to pull the fire alarm one a week at work or call in a bomb threat once a week ? 

Find a real Bigfoot or a real ghost ? 

Have to wear shorts in the winter or snow pants in the summer ? 

Sauna or cold plunge ? 

Do ten years for a crime you didn’t commit or get sued once a year by a litigious cunt 

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10 questions with a guy named the obvious one

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Patriots off season update

Additions and subtractions since we last spoke

IN _ S - Kevin Byard – 1st team all pro. Elite, premier ball hawk, communicator and play maker, lead NFL in INTs last year.  164 games career games. Ex Titan 32 years old. $8million 1 year

OUT – Jaylin Hawkins to the Ravens. Bye bye.

IN – Julian Hill 3 year up $18 million. 45 games – 25 starts for Miami. Blocking TE.  33 Rec 288 yards 0 TDs in career.

OUT – Hooper and Westover. Bye bye.

Lesser depth pieces – IN S – Mike Brown ex Titan. 

IN -  KJ Britt LB. Maybe more than depth. Ex 5th round pick of Bucs.

OUT – LBs, Tavia, Jennings, Jack Gibbens.

Running through the up to date Patriots Roster

AJ Brown reportedly wont be traded until June 1st to avoid a cap hit.  Seems like Pats are willing to wait.

Eagles signed Hollywood Brown reportedly. 1 year $6.5 million

Denver wasn’t - Jaylen Waddle traded to Broncos for 1st, 3rd, and 4th. YUCK.  Another team off the board for Eagles.

“…The whole idea of the No. 1 receiver, how many of them are there in the NFL?” Wolf said. “Maybe half the teams have one. So I don’t know if that’s a prerequisite for being a good football team. In my experience, it hasn’t been. I think as long as you have a lot of good players and diverse skill sets, like we have, then that stuff kind of takes care of itself.”

NFL Network's Cameron Wolfe shared his thoughts on the moves on The Insiders.

"They may not be done at either position, in regards to safety or wide receiver," Wolfe said. "This is a team that's still looking to upgrade in the next few days ahead, and a team that feels like last year was just the beginning of what could be a great run under Mike Vrabel in New England."

Any news on Diggs? Some rumblings he may be an option to come back. For it?

According to Wolf, there was a combination of factors that came into play when making the decision. Diggs was a key factor for the Patriots' offense in 2025, recording 85 receptions for 1,013 yards and four touchdowns.

However, he was set to cost $26.5 million against the salary cap in 2026 at 32 years old. It was a tough spot for the Patriots, unless both sides could agree on a restructured deal.

“Just a variety of factors, looking at financials, ability… Nothing but respect for Stefon," Wolf told reporters.

"I wouldn’t say the door’s closed,” Wolf said, via Patriots Wire's Sophie Weller. “I mean, again, we’re gonna look through every way we possibly can to help improve the team.”

Keys adds and losses

https://www.nbcsportsboston.com/nfl/new-england-patriots/roster-needs-nfl-draft-free-agency-trades-aj-brown/776106/

Biggest needs:

Offensive Line Depth – Tackle. Lowe replacement/ Moses successor

Another high-end WR

Doubs, Hollins, Boutte, Douglas, Williams

Edge Rusher They ranked 26th in sacks, 20th in sack percentage and 23rd in opponent's time to throw last season, per Next Gen Stats.

Per NBC sports – 3rd down passing catching back.  Shouldn’t that be Henderson?

I want another pass catching TE.

Up to date Patriots roster - https://www.patspulpit.com/new-england-patriots-depth-chart/122534/updated-roster-practice-squad-2026-nfl-season

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Jaylen Brown

-          Putting stamps on MVP candidacy that he will never get

o   39 min 41 pts 10 – 20 FG 2- 5 3pt, 10-21 FT – 7 Reb, 6 asst, 1 stl, 1 blcok

-          Has his campaign against the officials worked?

o   Is he good for the league? Does the league think so

MVP odds

-          SGA - -1000

-          Jokic - -1000

-          Wembanyama - +1900

-          Cunningham - +8000

-          Doncic - +8000

-          Brown - +20,000

Jaylen Brown on hearing MVP chants from the home crowd: "It's pretty cool, I'm not gonna lie. It's pretty awesome to be at this point in my career and get that love from the fans...I got some MVP chants in Southie. I think that might've been a little cooler."

Jaylen Brown by the numbers

Points 6th 28.4 – behind Doncic, SGA, Jokic.

FG ATT – 3rd most 21.6. Only Doncic shoots more 22.4

FG % - 47.7% Behind – Wemby, SGA, Jokic,

FT attempted – 10th 7.3 – behind Doncic 1st – 10.1, SGA 9.1, Jokic 7.8, Wembanya 11th – 7.0

Reb – 30th – 7.1, Behind Jokic #1 12.7 and Wembanyama 5th 11.2. Doncic 22nd – 7.9

Asst – 32nd – 5.1, (3rd on his own team) – behind Jokic #1 10.5, Cunningham #2 10.1, Doncic #3 – 8.5, SGA 6.7,

Steals – Brown not top 50.  Behind SGA, Doncic, Cunningham, Jokic,

Blocks – Brown not top 50. Behind Wemby, Cunningham, SGA

Advanced stats

Offensive rating

Brown 43rd – behind Pritchard and white and hauser, and walsh. Top 10 -  #1 Jokic, SGA, Wemby

Def rating

Brown 339. 113.7– Top 10 -  Wemby, SGA (#1 Chet Holmgren 103.1) Meemias Queta 105.6, Hugo Gonzalez 105.5

Net Rating –

Brown 108 – top 10  #1 SGA, Wemby, Jokic

Usage percentage

#1 Doncic, #2 Brown, SGA, Wemby, Cunningham

Jaylen Brown is producing via volume and beating up a bad East.

Celtics strength of Schedule – 24th - .495 winning %

Teams behind them. Charlotte, Dallas, Washington, Minnesota, Memphis.

Teams ahead – Houston, Indiana, Detroit, Chicago, Atlanta, Utah New Orlean, Philly, Milwaukee #16th

Per ESPN – expected Winning % .747 – 3rd best record in the NBA behind Detroit and OKC.

Currently Celtics are 45-23 .662 winning %.  Sitting behind Detroit and OKC and Spurs.  Slight underachieving but no Tatum for ¾ of the year.

Team ranks –

ORTG – 2nd

DFTG – 5th

NETRTG – 2nd

3pt% - 10th

Exactly where they should be.

Re-setting the “Talent they lost”

Porzingus – Has only played in 23 games.  

$30.7 million

Horford – 25/26 – 21 minutes – coming off the bench – 8 pts, 5reb, 2.6 asst

Replaced by Queta - inside presence 25 min 10 pts, 8 reb, 1.5 ass. 64 FG %. Top 10 def rating

Vucevic – outside presence, 21 min, ` 10 pts, 7 reb, 1.8 asst

$5.6 million – Horford fucked up

Jrue Holiday – 29 min – 16pts, 4.6 reb, 6.2 asst, 46% FG% 38% 3pt

You can second guess this. Trade got you Simons which got Vucevic. This was a money move.

With Celtics - 24/25 – 30 min – 11 pts, 4 reb, 4 asst, 44% FG, 35% 3pt

$32.4 million

Exactly where they should be. Credit to Mazzula for getting young kids and scrubs to play hard. Lets see the playoffs.

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SIMPLEST MINDS OF THE WEEK

Whats up craig

Athletes

Bike boy

Tasmanian devil 

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THIS OR THAT WITH CHIEF BOBBY

Hide and seek or tag ? 

Be one of the first astronauts to colonize another planet or be the last to pulverize the rear of a dirty whore ?

Walk with crutches all the time or have a serious speech impediment ? 

Live as a pirate during pirate times or a ninja during ninja times ? 

Make everyone  give you the secret password if they want anything from you or you have get people to do the secret handshake with you if you want anything 

Have to take sleeping pills in the morning Or caffeine pills at night ? 

Live in a culture with arranged marriages or arranged careers ? 

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NFL Free Agency

DE Jaelan Phillips – Panthers – 4 years $120 million (80 guaranteed)

CB Trent McDuffie – Rams – 4 years $124 million (100 guaranteed)

WR Alec Pierce -  Colts – 4 years $114 million  (Patriots willing to go to $27million per – he got $29 mill)

C Tyler Linderbaum – Raiders – 3 years $81 million (60 guaranteed)

RB – Travis Etienne – saints – 4 years $52 million

Qb Malik Willis – Dolphins – 3 years $67 million

Ken Walker – Chiefs – 4 years $45 million

Notable departing free agents: WR Stefon Diggs (released); TE Austin Hooper (UFA); DE K’Lavon Chaisson (UFA); S Jaylinn Hawkins (UFA); DT Khyiris Tonga; OT Vederian Lowe (UFA)

Signings: DE Dre’Mont Jones (3 years, $39.5 million); FB Reggie Gilliam (3 years, $12M); OG Alijah Vera-Tucker (3 years, $42 million)

Trades: Traded C Garrett Bradbury to the Bears in exchange for a 2027 fifth-round pick

Available Players of note

DE - Trey Henderickson

WR – George Pickens

WR – Tyreek Hill

OT – Rasheed Walker – Packers – 3 year starter 26 years old. Good not great. RT?

WR – Jauan Jennings

WR – Romeo Doubs

TE – Moe Alie Cox

S – Kevin Byard – 33 – Bears – Ex Titan with Vrabel

Trade Rumors – AJ Brown.  Eagles denied 1st and 3rd?

Brian Thomas – Jags – “Wont be cheap”

Chris Olave has come up in conversations – Josina Anderson

The New England Patriots roster philosophy is not about Talent. It is about contracts.

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Has the biggest question about Mazzulla’s Celtics been answered? Can they win when challenged and pushed?

Tatum’s Return

Thoughts on the drama surrounding the return?

First game back vs Mavericks – 27 minutes – 15 pts – 6-16 – 3-8 from 3. 12 Reb – 7 asst – 1 stl

-          20 point win

-          Super embarrassing missed dunk

Jaylen Brown in that game – 33 minutes – 24 pts  - 9-17 – 2-5 from 3.  7 reb 7 asst 2 stl

Game 2 vs Cavs – 27 minutes – 20 pts – 6-16 – 2-9 from 3. 6-7 FT – 3 reb – 2 asst

Brown – 38 min – 23 pts – 7-17 – 1 – 3 from 3. 8-9 FT – 9 reb – 8 asst

How long until Tatum’s fully taken over the offense? Any chance he folds into the Jaylen Brown offense?

Current Roster

White – Brown – Hauser – Tatum – Queta

Pritchard,

Scheierman, Gonzalez, Walsh

Garza, (Vucevic broken finger. Out a month)

How big of a leap will they or can they take with Tatums return?

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