One of those things people warn you about home ownership is the cost of maintenance, both in time and in money. So much effort goes into our homes. Sometimes it can be daunting, as if we are serving them instead of they serving us.
When something spills or breaks or gets damaged in our home Tina and I are fond of looking at each other and saying, “And that’s why we can’t have nice things.” We blame the dogs, or ourselves or just that we have too many people over too often. But the real reason we can’t have nice things is really just … Life.
Life is messy. Life will always be messy. It’s actually written in the rules. The fundamental laws of physics tell us that order will always eventually end up in disorder. And so, although we all spend a great deal of time trying to tidy it all up, at some point you have to allow life to be messy. Otherwise you run the risk of not living it. Our struggle to keep things perfect doesn’t free us of life’s imperfections. It only imprisons us in them. It may seem counter intuitive for a home designer to tell you to let it go but for me, your home has always been about you. And unfortunately I’ve seen first hand how easy it is to waste an entire life straightening photos on the wall instead of living a life worthy of being in those photos.
I want you to have a beautiful home. I want your home to work. I want you to take care of your home so it will be there to help whenever you need it. I want your home to tell your story or at very least fit with your story so it frees you to live your story all the more.
But I also don’t want your home to consume you. I don’t want its imperfections to plague you. The truth is, you and I and everything else in this universe is aging. Even right at this moment if everything seems fine, very soon something will break or begin to rub or squeak or crack or leak or burn out.
That’s not a tragedy, that’s just life. The messiness and endless imperfections and brevity of this life is the real reason we can’t have nice things. So does that mean it’s futile to design your home? Of course not. Not if it’s an expression of who you are and not if it frees you to be even more. But remember that what you are is precious and wondrous and imperfect. So perhaps it’s ok for your home to be the same.
The great songwriter Leonard Cohen put it this way, “There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.”
So if there’s something that really needs fixing, go fix it. But if it’s just a little worn, a little old, a little faded, then maybe put it on a list for later. And today, instead of trying to make everything perfect, go out there and build yourself a beautifully imperfect life.