Knowing Her Sexually

It's been a minute! Chris and J are finally back to explain their absence and the future of Knowing Her Sexually going forward. We plan to keep providing quality content intended to help husbands better understand their wives and pursue healthy, mutually satisfying sexual intimacy. 

Resources

• Knowing Her Sexually Webinars
• KHS Ministry | Facebook
• KHSMinistry (@KhsMinistry) / Twitter
• Honeycomb & Spice (honeycombspice.com)
• Hot, Holy & Humorous (hotholyhumorous.com)

Support Us

Click HERE to support our podcast and other resources through Patreon.

Christmastime can create wonderful memories, but also a lot of to-dos and stress that keep couples from being sexually intimate. J and guest host Julie Sibert discuss how to have less stress and more sex in your marriage this holiday season.

Sponsor

Looking for a safe place to shop for marital aids? Check out Married Dance, a Christian-friendly sex toy store. Experience a nudity-free, marriage-centered environment, along with discreet shipping and billing. 

Resources

• Episode 31: Why Do Women Overextend Themselves?
• Episode 19: Having an Intimate Holiday Season
• Why She’s Too Busy to Have Sex
• Helping Your Wife Want to Have Sex – Webinar Replay

This Week's Takeaway

Ask your wife, "How can I help our Christmas season go well?" Discuss plans, expectations, division of labor, and more, so that you're working as a team through the holidays—a team that also scores in the bedroom now and then. ~wink~

Visit our website: khsministry.com

How can you give your wife a gift that speaks to her heart? A great gift can create feelings of being seen and valued that encourage the trust and vulnerability she needs for sexual intimacy.

Visit Our Sponsor

Did you know that Hot, Holy & Humorous has a site store?

Private Christmas gift tags, sexy Christmas coupons & more!

Resources

• The Ultimate Gift List for Married Couples, 2020 Edition – Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Hot, Holy, and Humorous: Sex in Marriage by God’s Design by J. Parker (“Cultivating Romance” chapter has specifics on writing a love letter)
• 'Twas the Intimate Night Before Christmas: A Marriage Poem – Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Lingerie – The Forgiven Wife
• 2020 Gift Shopping Links – The Forgiven Wife
• Use Scent to Enhance Your Sex Life – The Forgiven Wife
• More Than Bacon – The Forgiven Wife
• Best (Sexy) Christmas Gifts for Your Spouse - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Shop - Hot, Holy & Humorous

Note from Chris: In the episode I mentioned writing a sexy version of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. Unfortunately, it was not on my blog but on a discussion forum that no longer exists and I no longer have a copy. However, you can get the original book at Amazon, as well as a fun Cookie Sutra book.

This Week's Takeaway

Give at least one gift that shows your wife you really see her and honor her for who she uniquely is.

Visit our website: khsministry.com

What role can quickies play in your marriage's sexual intimacy? We discuss what's good about quickies, why some wives don't like them, and how husbands can make the experience more enjoyable for her.

Resources

• 5 Reasons to Love a Quickie - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Showering and Bathing Together: Why You Should Try It - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 5 Tips for Shower Sex - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• What a Quickie Taught Us About Sexual Intimacy - The Forgiven Wife

This Week's Takeaway

Find a time to suggest a quickie to your wife. If she gives you the go-ahead, go for it! But if she’s reluctant, launch a conversation about why she doesn’t enjoy quickies and/or how you could make them better for her.

Visit our website for more great content: khsministry.com. Be sure to check out our value-priced webinars. And if this podcast has helped you, would you leave us a positive rating and/or review? That will help others find us and keep us podcasting well into the future. Thanks for your support! "And Adam knew his wife Eve..." Genesis 4:1a

Instead of "show up naked," how about using clothing to increase arousal and pleasure? Chris and J discuss why and how clothing can be sexy for a wife.

Resources

• Why I Still Wear Lingerie (though My Hubby Doesn't Care) - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Why Won’t Your Wife Wear Lingerie?
• 7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Lingerie - The Forgiven Wife
• Should You Buy Her Lingerie for Christmas?
• What Should Your Husband Wear to Turn You On? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Husbands Only Need One of These to Turn Her On - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• "Touch the Bits" by Amanda Gore - YouTube
• Episode 60: Use the 5 Senses to Help Her Engage with Sex

Also check out our Increasing Your Wife’s Sexual Pleasure – Webinar Replay!

This Week's Takeaway

Engage in affection and foreplay with you and your wife clothed, even incorporating your clothing into the sensual experience.

Visit our website for more great content: khsministry.com. Be sure to check out our value-priced webinars.

And if this podcast has helped you, would you leave us a positive rating and/or review? That will help others find us and keep us podcasting well into the future. Thanks for your support!

"And Adam knew his wife Eve..." Genesis 4:1a

How can you help your wife engage more in the sexual experience? Chris and J share how a husband can use the five senses to increase his wife's focus and enjoyment.

Resources

• J"s #SexTipTuesday Facebook post: What do you do with your eyes during sex?
• 70+ Intimate Face to Face Sex Positions | Christian-friendly Sex Positions)
• Experience Deeper Intimacy During Sex | The Forgiven Wife
• Bedroom Soundtrack Posts | Bonny's Oysterbed7
• A Marital Intimacy Playlist - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• "Let me hear your voice..." - Song of Songs 2:14
• Talking Flirty vs. Talking Dirty - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 101 Words for Your Private Parts (But No Curse Words) - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Use Scent to Enhance Your Sex Life | The Forgiven Wife
• Food and Sex | The Forgiven Wife
• Why She Needs Him to Shower - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• What About His Grooming and Hygiene? | The Forgiven Wife
• 5 Kisses You Need to Master - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• How Do You Like to Be Touched? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 6 Kinds of Touch Every Marriage Needs - Hot, Holy & Humorous

Also check out our Increasing Your Wife’s Sexual Pleasure – Webinar Replay!

This Week's Takeaway

Be intentional in thinking about one of your wife's physical senses and add some way of appealing to that next time you are having sex or planning to have sex.

Visit our website for more great content: khsministry.com. Be sure to check out our value-priced webinars.

And if this podcast has helped you, would you leave us a positive rating and/or review? That will help others find us and keep us podcasting well into the future. Thanks for your support! "And Adam knew his wife Eve..." Genesis 4:1a

We're back after an unannounced and unexpected hiatus! Looking at the searches that bring husbands to our site, Chris and J ask and try to answer the question "Why doesn't / can't / won't my wife do ____?" in the bedroom. 

Resources

• Why Your Wife May Not Want to Receive Oral Sex
• Why Doesn’t She Want to Give You Oral Sex? 8 Reasons That Are Not About You
• Why Doesn’t She Want to Give You Oral Sex? 5 Reasons That Are About You (and What You Can Do About Them)
• How Can She Not Care About Sex?
• Episode 37: Why Sex Can Feel Risky to Your Wife
• Helping Your Wife Want to Have Sex – Webinar Replay
• Increasing Your Wife’s Sexual Pleasure – Webinar Replay
• Spicing Up Your Bedroom – Webinar Replay
• "Stop Pressuring Me!" - The Forgiven Wife
• And J promised a video of the Texel sheep from the farm where she stayed in England: https://youtu.be/5p9AsMyWE3c

This Week's Takeaway

Write down your "Why won't / can't / doesn't she...?" question, then first ask yourself why you want that and then approach your wife and ask what she hears or thinks you mean when you ask why she won't / can't / doesn't do or want what you do. (And listen. Like really listen.)

Visit our website: khsministry.com

Every marriage goes through a big life transition at some point, and likely several. Chris and J talk about how transitions affect sex in marriage and how to keep intimacy going even through the big changes.

Resources

• Are Stress & Fatigue Killing Your Sex Life? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Making a Habit | The Forgiven Wife
• Lost Her Way In Target (original song) - The Holderness Family - YouTube
• How Wives Feel During the Pandemic - Knowing Her Sexually (with some insight that applies to other big changes)

This Week's Takeaway

Think about the last transition you and your wife went through. Consider what you learned from it and then break that down with your wife, asking her how she thought things went and what could improve next time. 

"Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it." — George Santayana

Visit our website: khsministry.com

A listener shared that "[husbands] are told...to be sensitive to our wives' physical discomfort such as menstrual cramps but are also told that we cannot share when lack of physical intimacy causes physical discomfort in us as that won't be well received." Is there a double standard? How can a husband effectively express his sexual discomfort to his wife?

Sponsor

Visit Married Dance HERE (affiliate link)

Resources

• Q&A with J: Sexual Wants Vs. Needs - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• A Husband’s Emotional Need | The Forgiven Wife
• How the Sexually Rejected Spouse Feels - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Interview with Big Guy | The Forgiven Wife
• Remembering the Dry Years: An Interview with J’s Husband
• Episode 2: How to Ask for Sex
• Helping Your Wife Want to Have Sex – Webinar Replay

This Week's Takeaway

Jot down a few ideas of how to express your sexual discomfort to your wife with words she'd understand. Take time to think them through for a while, then try one out. If it doesn't work, go back and try another!

Visit our website: khsministry.com

Chris and J usually talk about women's sexuality with the hope of helping men understand their wives. But today, we discuss what women don't understand about men's sexuality.

Resources

• Episode 12: Guy Talk - The Importance of Sex - Sex Chat for Christian Wives
• Episode 14: Guy Talk - A Wife's Beauty - Sex Chat for Christian Wives
• Episode 16: Guy Talk - Men's Sexuality - Sex Chat for Christian Wives
• Ten Lies Wives Believe about Sex (And Ten Truths Husbands Want You To Know) - Hot, Holy & Humorous - guest post by Scott Means
• You Would If You Loved Me! - Hot, Holy & Humorous - guest post by Paul Byerly
• Love Your Man: Should Your Husband's Sexuality Be Like Yours? - The Forgiven Wife

This Week's Takeaway

Don't assume your wife understands your sexuality. Rather, when she seems confused or asks questions about why you do what you do or feel what you feel, take time to explain how your sexuality works.

Visit our website: khsministry.com