Knowing Her Sexually

Have you asked your wife what she likes in bed, only to hear her say that she doesn't really know? As unbelievable as this may sound to you, it's pretty common. J and Chris share some ideas to help you help your wife figure out what she wants.

Resources

• Webinar: Increasing Your Wife's Sexual Pleasure
• Episode 43: Rebuilding Her Trust, with Jessica McCleese
• Episode 6: Does Choreplay Work?
• Creating an Inviting Bedroom
• 4 Ways to Be Present During Sex | The Forgiven Wife
• How Do You Like to Be Touched? - Hot, Holy & Humorous

This Week's Takeaway

Have a conversation with your wife about what strategies from this episode she would like to try.

Have a conversation with your wife about what strategies from this episode she would like to try.

Have a conversation with your wife about what strategies from this episode she would like to try.

Visit the website: khsministry.com

A husband in our KHS Community recently asked about staying hopeful through the sexual ups and downs in marriage. J and Chris share some ideas that can help you maintain hope.

• Are You Bitter in Your Marriage? So Was I.
• How Having Friends Is Good for Your Sex Life
• Work on Yourself (Even if Your Husband Is the Problem) | Honeycomb & Spice
• He Doesn't Care About Progress. He Just Wants Results. | The Forgiven Wife
• Slow Progress: A Good Thing | The Forgiven Wife
• How Growth Looks | The Forgiven Wife
• Healthy Marriages Start with Healthy People - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Give Him the Gift of Happiness - Hot, Holy & Humorous (or give her)
• Dealing with Discouragement | The Forgiven Wife
• Get Rid of All Bitterness | The Forgiven Wife
• The Magic Relationship Ratio, According to Science (gottman.com)
• When My Marriage Seemed Hopeless, What Made Me Stay? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• "Treat people the same way you want them to treat you." Luke 6:31 (NASB)

Keep a gratitude journal. Every day make note of a few things you're thankful for with your wife.

With Chris out today, Dr. Jessica McCleese joins J to discuss how a husband who may have mishandled sexual intimacy in the marriage before can rebuild his wife's trust in the bedroom and beyond.

Resources

• Dr. Jessica McCleese's website
• FREE webinars with Jessica and J. Parker: Let's Talk About Talking Dirty and Negative Teaching About Sex: How It's Hurt Your Marriage and What to Do About It
• Two Words That Could Change the Course of Sex in Your Marriage - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Are You Listening to What Your Spouse Says about Sex? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 3 Barriers to Communicating with Your Spouse about Sex - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Pillow Talk: 40 Conversations about Sex for Married Couples by J. Parker
• Rebuilding His Trust - The Forgiven Wife
• He Doesn't Care About Progress. He Just Wants Results. - The Forgiven Wife

This Week's Takeaway

Ask your wife the three questions posed by Dr. Jessica McCleese, even weekly until your wife feels your trustworthiness.

Visit our website: khsministry.com

We welcome special guest Dave Barringer, senior pastor of Kalamazoo First Assembly of God and author of Mosaic Marriage, to talk with us about foreplay in and out of the bedroom.

Resources

• Dave Barringer's website
• Launch Point book site
• Mosaic Marriage by Dave Barringer
• Episode 6: Does Choreplay Work? - KHS Ministry
• Freshen Up Your Foreplay - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Newsflash, Hubbies! She Loves Foreplay. - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• What Wives Long to Hear from Their Husbands (In Their Own Words) - Hot, Holy & Humorous

This Week's Takeaway

Give your wife 8–10 positive words (affirmation, compliment, encouragement) each day without expectation to deepen intimacy.

Visit our website: khsministry.com

Chris and J tackle four truths about sex that husbands should know, especially those who long for better physical intimacy in their marriage.

• Why Doesn't She Initiate?
• Work on Yourself (Even If Your Husband Is the Problem) | Honeycomb & Spice
• The Power of "And" | The Forgiven Wife
• I Worked on Sex, and Then He Got Angry | The Forgiven Wife
• He Doesn't Care About Progress. He Just Wants Results | The Forgiven Wife
• Silence the Lies | The Forgiven Wife
• Why Doesn't She Initiate?
• Work on Yourself (Even If Your Husband Is the Problem) | Honeycomb & Spice
• The Power of "And" | The Forgiven Wife
• I Worked on Sex, and Then He Got Angry | The Forgiven Wife
• He Doesn't Care About Progress. He Just Wants Results | The Forgiven Wife
• Silence the Lies | The Forgiven Wife
• Praying for Grace in Your Marriage - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• As You Work on Sexual Intimacy, Be Sure to Do This! - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• How to Turn Your Marriage Around - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Are You Bitter in Your Marriage? So Was I. | KHS Ministry
• 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV) – "Love is patient, love is kind..."
• Faithful Counseling online therapy (Sex Chat for Christian Wives affiliate link)
•  

When your mind goes to negative thoughts about your wife, replace them with a positive thought, scripture, or a prayer for your wife.

Being touched in nonsexual areas can be a real turn-on for your wife. J and Chris talk about where some of these areas are and give you suggestions for learning your wife's body.

Resources

• How Do You Like to Be Touched? - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 6 Kinds of Touch Every Marriage Needs - Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Why woman are different from men and vice versa by Amanda Gore
• Sexual Timing Matters - Knowing Her Sexually
• How Much Foreplay Does She Need? - Knowing Her Sexually

This Week's Takeaway

Explore your wife's body!

The Increasing Your Wife's Sexual Pleasure webinar says a lot more about learning about her body and includes the Mapping Her Body printable. Or, you can purchase the printable without the webinar. (Members of the KHS community have free access to these products.)

Purchase the webinar

Purchase the printable

Visit our website: khsministry.com

Your grooming and hygiene can have an impact on your wife's interest in sex. J and Chris explain why in today's episode.

Resources

• What About His Grooming and Hygiene? | The Forgiven Wife
• Q&A with J: What about “Manscaping”? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Why She Needs Him to Shower | Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Mentioned in the episode: NPR's Delicious Dish: Schweddy Balls - SNL - YouTube
• And a recommendation: Fresh Balls Hygiene for Groin Area (Amazon affiliate link)

This Week's Takeaway

Next time you and your wife have sex, bring your cleanest and best-groomed self to bed.

Visit the website: khsministry.com

Today we take on the question Chris's husband and many other husbands have: "Why didn't your wife come with a manual?" That would be so much easier, right?

• What Does Her Orgasm Mean?
• The Romantic Vineyard, by Tom & Debi Walter

Ask your wife this question: "If marriage to you came with an instructional manual, what would the most important instruction be?"

How could sex be "risky" when it happens in marriage with the one you love? Chris and J discuss three ways sex can feel risky for some wives.

• What Are Your Sexual Fears? | Hot, Holy & Humorous
• 7 Reasons You Don't Want Sex | Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Which Words Do You Use? | The Forgiven Wife
• What Were You Taught About Sex? | The Forgiven Wife

Ask yourself what about sex feels risky to you and then try to address that issue.

In this episode, J and Chris tackle that age-old question, "What do women want?" It might be more simple than you thought!

Resources

• What Is Emotional Safety? (and What Does It Have to Do with Sex?)
• Security in the Bedroom | Hot, Holy & Humorous
• What Do Women Really Want? - The Gottman Institute
• Emotional Safety is Necessary for Emotional Connection - The Gottman Institute
• Praying Together for Your Marriage | Hot, Holy & Humorous
• Work on Yourself (Even if Your Husband Is the Problem) - Honeycomb & Spice

This Week's Takeaway

Does your wife feel emotionally safe? Click HERE to take a quiz and find out!

Visit the website: khsministry.com