Our brains are always at work making sense of people through ascribing motives.  But this ancient hack can fall short of serving it’s purpose in some major ways.  Here, I give 7 (or 8) principles… More

Our brains are always at work making sense of people through ascribing motives.  But this ancient hack can fall short of serving it's purpose in some major ways.  Here, I give 7 (or 8) principles that can help navigate the tricky terrain of making sense of peoples' words and actions.

Whole relationships are based on trust and truth.  But what is truth?  The truth is, objective truth can't be separated from our personal relationships, attachment, and our very humanity.  If we want to have functional relationships, we have to stop killing truth with the games that we play, and create margin for truth to grow.

Whole relationships are based on trust and truth.  But what is truth?  The truth is, objective truth can't be separated from our personal relationships, attachment, and our very humanity.  If we want to have functional relationships,

Whole relationships are based on trust and truth.  But what is truth?  The truth is, objective truth can’t be separated from our personal relationships, attachment, and our very humanity.  If we want to have functional… More

Whole relationships are based on trust and truth.  But what is truth?  The truth is, objective truth can't be separated from our personal relationships, attachment, and our very humanity.  If we want to have functional relationships, we have to stop killing truth with the games that we play, and create margin for truth to grow.

All relationships are power seeking power.   We often don’t realize it, since power comes in so many hidden forms, but everything we do and every interaction we have is based on this singular quest.  It is a universally human appetite that underlies every squabble and conflict under the sun.   Relationships will die if our power quest is left unchecked. There is a another more powerful force that feeds relationship: grace.

All relationships are power seeking power.   We often don’t realize it, since power comes in so many hidden forms, but everything we do and every interaction we have is based on this singular quest.  It is a universally human appetite that underli...

All relationships are power seeking power.   We often don’t realize it, since power comes in so many hidden forms, but everything we do and every interaction we have is based on this singular quest.  It… More

Relationships don't just happen.  They grow.  We aren't machines.  Ancient cultures likened us to trees and fruit -- this is us.  Every relationship with a spouse, a child, a friend, a parent, or a boss -- grows from something into something.   The best relationships start with nothing on but our identity.  And from that they give and give - and become something the world desperately needs.