Life Over Coffee

God did not create all friends equally. You have some friends you want in your inner circle because they are biblically mature and reciprocating. Perhaps there are others that you must keep at arm's length because they are tedious and require more work to maintain. This second group is unidirectional friends—acquaintances who cannot speak into your life, making it a one-way street: you always serve them. If you have a challenging friend, here are seven considerations.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/seven-considerations-for-challenging-friends/

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Shows Main Idea – I had the sex talk with our son when he was 12. I took him to the beach for a few days to discuss the most intimate relational dynamic between a man and a woman. One of our Mastermind students asked if I would share a few details about how I went about it, similar to Lucia’s talk with our daughters. What we did is only one way to have this vital talk, and I trust these ideas and perspectives will serve you, particularly if you’re planning to speak with your children.

Show Notes: https://lifeovercoffee.com/podcast/recently-sex-talk-son/

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Job’s wild ride through the crucible of suffering was coming to an end. The devil was nearing defeat, the Lord was receiving glory, and Job was changing. I knew the first two things would happen: Satan would lose, and God would win. What I did not expect was all the Lord wanted to do with my friend, Job. I did not even know he had a problem. He seemed to be a good man, going about doing good (Job 1:1, 5). After Satan turned his world upside down, he refused to sin or charge the Lord with any wrong (Job 1:22). I suppose I did not understand how to discern a person’s faith.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/you-know-your-faith-is-really-real-when-you-can-do-this/

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Shows Main Idea – A friend approached me, asking how to help his church because they have a weak view of biblical counseling. He is a lone voice with an effective biblical model for sanctification through discipleship. He wants to motivate his leaders but knows they prefer an integrated worldview and practice. It’s not that they have thought about it but have been affected by a psychologized zeitgeist. He asked me how I would address the issues if it were my church. What about you? Perhaps you love a purer form of discipleship, but you have friends who are unfamiliar with what that means or they are against biblical counseling. I trust these thoughts will encourage and help you, too.

Show Notes: https://lifeovercoffee.com/podcast/ep-30-shouldnt-make-big-deal-biblical-counseling/

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When things do not go according to our plans, and the losses keep mounting, it’s only a short step from walking away from God and the caring friends who are willing to persevere with us and our suffering. It is possible to get to that place of giving up, a perspective that buys into the belief that things won’t change to a more favorable outcome. It’s a tension between humans and the Divine when God does not act as we think He should. Though we know how this tug-o-war will end, it does not alter the tension, or the temptation to quit.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/how-can-i-trust-god-when-he-does-not-act-the-way-i-think-he-should/

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Does anyone love God because of who He is, or do we love Him for what we can receive from Him? I’m not implying it’s wrong to want things from the Lord because we should desire things from Him, like His salvation. However, there is a priority with all relationships. Do we enter friendships for what we can get out of them, or are we primarily interested in being with and serving that friend? Pertaining to God, it’s vital to examine the quality of our faith, always making our relationship with Him transcendent over self-interest while enjoying the beauty of knowing God for who He is.

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/three-keys-to-help-you-look-beyond-your-suffering/

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Shows Main Idea – A friend asked on our private forums whether you can tell if someone has changed. Of course, you cannot know in the ultimate sense—not at the heart level. I told my friend it would be unwise to focus on whether a person has changed since you cannot know for sure. Biblical counselors make this mistake too often, even at times releasing a person from counseling when they can never honestly know if they have changed. Alternately, it would be better to focus on better things while laying out better expectations and plans for those you're discipling.

Show Notes: https://lifeovercoffee.com/podcast/ep-454-the-risky-business-of-looking-for-change-in-someone/

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We have two possible responses to our problems. We can be problem-centered or God-centered. That’s it. The first reaction leads to anxious complaining and fear-motivated comments. Been there, done that. The second response is the path to peace, even while we are suffering. It’s hard to tell how mature we are until the suffering comes, so it’s wise to pay close attention to our thoughts and words when difficult times arrive. Perhaps the suffering will necessitate the Lord to take action, like whittling us down to proper size so that He can build us back up into vessels for His use.

https://lifeovercoffee.com/the-blessing-of-being-whittled-down-to-size-2/

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Sometimes, God can seem distant and possibly disinterested in what is happening in our lives. The silence of God is deafening as we seek answers when life takes a turn for the worse. We feel all alone on the ground level, a painful loneliness that turns our hearts upward. We are muttering and sputtering through life while God is off fighting battles that seem more important to Him than tending to our business. We want an audience with the King. We need to hear what He has to say about our problems. Or do we? Are we really prepared for what He has to say?

Read Here: https://lifeovercoffee.com/do-you-really-want-to-know-what-god-is-thinking-2/

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Shows Main Idea – Since Adam and Eve fell in the Garden of Eden, there have been injustices. It’s vital to recognize we live in a fallen world, not a utopian one. It is similar to getting married, thinking it will be happily ever after without defeats, setbacks, or injustices. Setting up an unreachable standard is a setup for disappointment, leading to responses that can never hit that high mark, only making things worse. Some folks can have a misguided idealism. But rather than focusing primarily on them, it would be more appropriate for us to ponder how to respond to a culture caught in the injustice trap.

Show Notes: https://lifeovercoffee.com/podcast/ep-38-speaking-injustices-culture/

Will you help us to continue providing free content for everyone? You can become a supporting member here https://lifeovercoffee.com/join/, or you can make a one-time or recurring donation here https://lifeovercoffee.com/donate/.