Like a Mother

Two years ago, Jenn Scalia, 34, was a recently divorced New Jersey mom, unemployed and living with her parents -- and miserable. This year she will bill $500,000  ($400,000 profit) from her coaching and business consulting business for female online entrepreneurs. One month she did $100,000 in sales.

What struck me about Jenn's story is not just that she made so much money, so quickly, but that she chose to make a 180-degree turn on her money mentality. I know a lot of people, including a lot of very rich people. There is not a big intelligence gap between the middle-class and the affluent. But there is a difference in money mentality. How did Jenn jump from one club to the next? After all, before losing her job, she felt she was doing really well with a $48,000 per year social marketing position for an Atlantic City casino. Then, she realized she deserved a whole lot more -- and got it.

In this episode Jenn and I discuss the steps she took to get through the money hangups that were holding her back [raise your hand if you, too, have daddy issues (me raising hand)], how it feels to be so financially abundant, and what she does to enjoy her newfound wealth.

Loving this podcast? Follow on RSS or  iTunes. 

I was so inspired by Jenn's single-mom success story that I also featured her in my new video course: How Not To Be A Broke Single Mom. She is one of 6 moms that I profile who found amazing professional and financial success after becoming single moms. 

Growing up, one of my fondest memories is waking up on school mornings in the winter, lured from my cozy bed to the still-chilly house by the smells of breakfast cooking. Every single morning of my childhood, my own single mom would rise before my two brothers and me, and cook a proper hot breakfast: Pancakes and sausage with applesauce on the side, french toast and bacon, any version of eggs and omelets, oatmeal or muffins. This was the midwest, and my mom grew up on a farm. Meals were square, big, and served with cold milk.

Now as a mom, I do more or less the same -- though I do find some short-cuts, like baking healthy muffins in bulk, freezing them, and microwave de-thawing them before dragging the kids out of bed. For dinner, I cook from scratch most evenings and we always sit down together for the meal -- something that makes me a bit of an anomaly these days. 

This shared passion for family dinners is just one thing that draws me to Leanne Ely.

Over the past few years I've looked to Leanne as a mentor. After all, this momma launched a 7-figure digital marketing enterprise long before "digital marketing" was even a term. 

Back in 2001, this mom was a breadwinning wife homeschooling her two kids in rural North Carolina when she launched SavingDinner.com, one of if not the first meal planning subscription businesses. The business kept her focused through a divorce and single motherhood, and blossomed into a 7-figure enterprise that employs 10 food writers, a CIO, COO, customer service team and a sister white-label business whose clients include nationally famous physicians and celebrity chefs. "I can do almost all of my work with my slippers on and no pantyhose involved, and I’ve always been there for all my kids’ events," she says.

Aside from business brilliance, Ely is an advocate -- building her enterprise on her mission to bring families back to the evening dinner table. In this episode we dish about our distain for picky eaters of all ages, our shared fond memories of home-cooked meals around the family dinner. 

In being so open about my romantic life and divorce, people -- strangers, even -- often confess to me the very personal, dirty details about their own personal lives. One big theme I hear again and again: Women frustrated with their husbands, whom they feel do not pull their weight around the house or with the kids. Then, in an angry whisper, she will lean in and snarl: "And I make all the money!"

That is what is happening, people: Women -- yay us! -- are getting ahead, winning professional success and the money that comes with it. As we close that wage gap, more and more women are earning more than their man. And cheating, conflict and divorce ensue. In fact, marriages are 50 percent more likely to end in the even that the woman earns more than her husband. Fact.

Today's guest, my friend personal finance journalist Farnoosh Torabi, geniusly wrote a whole book addressing this phenomenon head-on: the bestseller When She Makes More: 10 Rules for Breadwinning Women. Torabi, host of the So Money with Farnoosh Torabi podcast, is in her own marriage a breadwinning wife. Today she joins me as we dish about:

"It's not politically correct for a man to say: 'I'm emasculated by this.' If we don't address it head-on, marriages end up in divorce," Farnoosh says. "Even though I make more, does not mean I make all the decisions. I don't want all that responsibility!"

Loving this podcast? Follow on RSS or  iTunes:

I've known Samantha Ettus for three or four years now -- long before people had a reason to take my calls or do me favors. And she always took my calls, and supported me with advice and social media shout-outs and brainstorming when I needed it. So, of course, I always loved her.

But, that is all very authentic and honest, and has built a wildly successful speaking and writing career, which includes regular network TV appearances, a New York Times bestseller and The Pie Life: The Recipe for Professional and Personal Success, out September.

In this episode of Like a Mother with Emma Johnson, Samantha shares her formula for reaching your potential, squashing the negative self-talk that keeps you up at night, and expecting the very most out of life while embracing the fact that life is inherently hard and very, very messy. She laughs at my assessment of her Instagram feed, which a lesser person may dismiss her as too-perfect. After all, Samantha is a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with three adorable pumpkin kids, a handsome successful entrepreneur husband and fabulousness in every images of their Los Angeles life. But like the rest of us, she's gone through, it too, and Samantha generously shares the details of her own trials, which include a divorce, a broken engagement and a childhood coach who turned out to be a pedophile.

Sign up for Samantha Ettus's weekly newsletter here. A 5-minute read packed with useful advice, you can't afford to skip it.

Would you pay $3,000 to have lasers shot into your vagina to tighten it up?

What about $1,900 to have stem cells shot into your clitorious to improve sexual pleasure?

Hundreds of women each year get these services at Smooth Synergy Spa in New York City, says Nicole Contons who together with her physician husband runs the spa. These outpatient procedures can be had on the same day you get your facial peel and your mustache lasered. Incontience, lack of sexual sensation and a desire for a long, healthy sex life are driving businesses that offer these procedures, Contos says.

Contos made national headlines (Oprah!) 18 years ago when she was jilted at the alter at her own big greek wedding, but turned the paid-for reception into an actual party, instead of a pity party. Today she says she's happily married with two beautiful daughters, and helping women achieve physical and sexual health.

Contons talks about the new sexual revolution that fuels her business, the younger-man-older woman trend, and what it's like to have her husband looking at other women's vaginas all the live-long day.

"You have a younger face, you want a younger vagina," Contos says. "Why not have a vagina that matches your non-wrinkly face?"

Nicole Contos

Loving this podcast? Follow on RSS or  iTunes:

For several years now, we know the traditional, nuclear, two-parent, married hetero family is the minority. Instead, as many of us have suspected, the majority of kids in this country are being raised in households that are multigenerational, headed by gay parents, or -- in the majority of these non-traditional families -- single moms or dads.

We're talking hundreds of millions of kids and their parents who struggle to feel normal, even if the census bureau tells us that families like yours and mine are actually the normal ones.

This trend is so long coming, and affects so many people, that it is nearly amazing that we didn't already have a big website to document and celebrate it. Last year former top Canadian parenting magazine editor Brandie Weikle launched TheNewFamily.com, a website and podcast by the same name, that celebrates the myriad ways to define family.

Weikle, who lives next door to her ex-husband and his new wife, talks about the joys and challenges of navigating the no-man's land of reinventing family -- and how, in many ways, all the definitions and nuance don't always matter as much as the ties that bind. Her site and podcast celebrate divorced families, parenting a transgendered child, kids raised by grandparents, families where the wife earns more, a father who made giant sacrifices to make a European trip with his disabled child, and so many more. Her 1,000 Family Project aims to document 1,000 family stories -- celebrating and normalizing all of us. 

Loving this podcast? Follow on RSS or  iTunes:

Tammy Tibbetts, 29, bucks common assumption that millennials are a bunch of entitled brats.

Six years ago Tibbetts launched She's The First, a nonprofit that supports girls' education in developing countries. To-date, the charity has supported nearly 600 girls in 10 countries -- all thanks to Tibbetts fundraising, including her signature tie-die cupcake fundraisers and powerful command of social media and leveraging support on college campuses.

Named to Forbes' "5 Most Powerful Women Changing The World For Girls," and "30 Under 30," She's The First this year is on track to raise $1 million.

Have a listen to how Tibbetts' own high school experience, growing up in a blue-collar New Jersey family in which she was the first in her family to attend college -- just like the girls her organization supports. She shares with me her passion for teenage girls, which started with her own awkward high school years (voted "most shy"), through her experience as an editor at Seventeen magazine ("I didn't read Seventeen when I was in high school. I didn't think I was cool enough," she says), and to her remarkable work today.

Loving this podcast? Follow on RSS or  iTunes:

People, this is ridiculous. Women everywhere whine that there are no decent dudes out there. Men bitch there are no good women out there. Hogwash to all of it!

In this episode I chat with my friend Bruce Fretts (that's him above, cute, right?), who is such a nice guy, successful in his interesting career, great dad and is just burnt on dating. We talk about the two minutes we dated (and he suffered a panic attack at the burlesque show he took me to. Sigh.) and how online dating has changed the romance game forever.

I also chat with Katherine, a gorgeous single mom in Houston who is so successful in her career, an awesome mom and funny chick -- and she is just bitter about men! I help her get to the bottom of her hangups and we devise a Tinder prayer designed to help her find sexy love.

Love this show? Subscribe and leave a REVIEW on iTunes. Me love you long time xxx

Gay men are richer than everyone else, right? After all, they're men, so they automatically earn more than women, and they are less likely to have kids, which of course are the biggest bucks-suck of all time. Plus, just look at all the gay men you know. So, so fabulous. Right?

Not so fast, says today's guest.  

Ten years ago John Schnieder, 42, and David Auten, 45, found themselves, in many ways, typical of their peers. The Denver financial professionals were gay, young, hot, with solid incomes and a love of partying -- and were deeply in debt. 

With combined incomes of $70,000, they realized that clubbing, shopping and travel had landed them $51,000 in credit card debt and living in a basement apartment. 

The couple realized they had to make a change -- and over 2.5 years they not only paid off their debt, but bought a condo and started to build their financial future. They also realized that there was a huge need for financial education and support among their gay peers. The pair launched DebtFreeGuys, and wrote The Four Principles of a Debt Free Life and address the unique pressures and challenges gay men face when it comes to their money, including social isolation (hence, overspending on expensive clubs). 

In this episode , John shares their story about his and David's come-to-Jesus moment, their take on gay men and money, and their plans to be a unique voice in the personal finance space, speaking to their gay peers. 

Moms and money! In this episode I interview two amazing women: 

Mandi Woodruff, 27, is personal finance correspondent at Yahoo! and podcaster at Brown Ambition (with recent Like a Mother guest Tiffany 'The Budgetnista' Aliche). She also has an awesome boyfriend (they live in my neighborhood and have had dinner with my kids and me. Two words: A. Dorbs.) Why is she having such an existential crisis about when to have a baby? Mandi and talk through this very common challenge of women her age -- the pressure to have your career, finances and love life in perfect shape before bringing a little person into the world. 

I also interview Laura Vanderkam, mom of 4 and author of 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think, and I Know How She Does It: How Successful Women Make The Most of Their Time (in which she quotes moi). Laura is a student of America's time use-- especially families with professional mothers. She breaks down the myths about how much time we all think we spend with our kids, how much time we actually spend with our kids, and how much time our children actually need us. You'll be shocked and liberated to go live a better life!