Make the Shift

Do you ever feel confused by your relationship with alcohol?  

You may be thinking that you don't necessarily have a 'problem' per se, but curious as to why you keep reaching for something that you know deep down is keeping you from feeling the way you want to feel.   The truth is that alcohol in and of itself isn't necessarily a 'bad thing.'  We drink to have fun, be social, celebrate and connect with one another.  However, there can be a fine line between having fun and being social and recognizing that there might be a bigger issue at hand.   

Today's guest, Sherry B. Price, PharmD, MBA, APh, BCPS is a women’s empowerment coach, pharmacist, and creator of the Drink Less Lifestyle. She helps women kick the over-drinking habit and regain confidence and control around alcohol while creating a life they love.  I recognize that this can be a tender topic and I love the gentleness and grace that Dr. Sherry approaches something so touchy with.   In this episode I am chatting with Dr. Sherry about her own relationship with alcohol and what led her to realize that maybe she did need to re-examine how she was approaching it.   

Dr. Sherry breaks down 

If you're ready to explore your relationship with alcohol (or anything you might do in excess), you won't want to miss this episode.  

 "Life is about expressing our fullness and not having to rely on a substance to be able to do that for us." Sherry Price "I never thought my drinking was that severe, yet it was more than I wanted." Sherry Price 

"I was a gray area drinker. Meaning, I  wasn't so severe that I needed to do rehab or check in somewhere. But it was definitely impacting certain areas of my life." Sherry Price 

"I'm not quite an alcoholic. So these options (rehab, day treatment programs) don't work. But then what other help is there?" Sherry Price 

"I always thought it was a drinking problem. And the more I thought it was a drinking problem, the more I focused on the alcohol, and putting rules around my drinking like- I'm not going to have it Monday through Thursday, but I'll allow myself to have it Friday and Saturday. However, the truth was that I  wasn't doing the inner work.  I wasn't looking at what was causing the desire for my excessive drinking."  Sherry Price 

"If what's driving you to drink is a painful marriage or something else going on in your life. Let's work on that." Sherry Price "What's your go to? Check in  with yourself and evaluate.. when I become really triggered, stressed or overwhelmed. What do I reach for?" Krista Resnick 

"It's about your relationship with alcohol. Perhaps it's worth asking the question-Why I'm choosing to grab that glass?"  Krista Resnick 

Krista Resnick | Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Dr. Sherry Price | Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Elise Knox is a life and wellness coach, yoga teacher, and former middle school teacher who works with moms and teens. She is fascinated by brain development and the nervous system and believes that understanding these two things can make teen years so much easier for mamas and teens.

Elise offers mama centered and teen centered coaching packages. Her mission is to bring enjoyment back into family relationships by helping her clients connect with themselves so that they can stay connected to their loved ones.

In today's episode, we talk about all things boundaries, teens and so much more.  I have a passion for parents staying connected to their kids during those turbulent years (having raised 3 of them myself) so this episode is near and dear to my heart.  

Before listening to this episode consider:

"There's so many aspects to being a parent of a teen that are challenging." ~Elise Knox

"I think teens get a bad rap. When you meet with them one on one, the depth and the width in the knowledge and the capacity in these young people is amazing." ~Elise Knox

"When it comes to mom's of teens, one of the best thing a mother can do is to be connected to herself. So often we are busy fixing problems or worrying about our kids, but ultimately our own cup has to be full in order to meet our teen and her needs." ~Elise Knox

LINKS FROM EPISODE

Krista Resnick

Elise Knox | Instagram | 7 Days of Connection with your Teen

I can't think of a better time to release this episode than the New Year.  So many of us want to create beautiful things in this fresh season, yet we struggle with comparison, convincing ourselves that we don't have the right skill set to share our gifts.  Or we struggle with fear, believing that we aren't smart enough or qualified to share our opinions and our wisdom.  This doesn't move the needle forward on anything our hearts desire and it leaves us feeling hopeless, insecure and disappointed.

That's why this discussion with Susan Barber, Visibility Coach, author and podcaster is so imperative right now.

Susan and I chat about all things visibility whether it's being more visible in your marriage, friendships, community or corporation.  She has put together a simple  framework that people can use to begin being visible in their own style, and authenticity.  What I love about this dialogue is how honest and vulnerable Susan is with her own struggle to be visible.  I learned so much from this discussion and I have no doubt you will too.

Before listening consider:

Listen to Learn:

“Two words I have embraced for myself…imperfect action!” ~Susan Barber

“I never really knew how to trust myself. I didn't know how to trust that I was doing the right things, I would always wait for someone else to tell me.” ~Susan Barber

“The baby steps in between that actually get us from A to B.” ~Susan Barber

“Feedback can help you amplify your potential.”~Krista Resnick

CLEAR IS KIND VISION PLANNING PARTY-BOUNDARY STYLE

SUSAN BARBER

The Visibility Book

The Visibility Factor Podcast

2023...WHO are you going to become?  What are you going to create with your life?

This podcast is an absolute must listen for all of you wanting to cultivate something different in your life this year.

Listen to learn:

"Taking the feedback from our own life is a powerful tool-otherwise, we are carrying all that didn't work so well for us into 2023."~Krista Resnick

"In 2023, who are you going to become?" ~Krista Resnick

"Sometimes, the very first place we need to start is giving ourselves permission to stop trying to do it all.   To stop saying yes to everyone else, so that you can make your highest contribution towards the things that are essential....the things that actually matter to you." ~Krista Resnick

LINKS MENTIONED IN SHOW

Clear is Kind Vision Planning Party-Boundary Style

I created this process of reflection a few years ago because truthfully, it was exactly what I needed.  I spent so much time forging ahead into the New Year, ready to ditch the past and leave everything behind.  I watch many people do the same.  I want to encourage you to reconsider and try something different.  There is so much rich information in the feedback of your life.  And when we don't take the time to complete it, we limit our ability to move forward.  We continue into the new year gangbusters style, hoping and wishing for a new things, yet we don't realize that we are carrying with us old behaviors, habits and patterns from the past.  

Listen to Learn:

Clear Is Kind Vision Planning Party-Boundary Style

Have you ever set a goal or wanted something in life but 3 days later you found yourself "sabotaging" the very thing you say you are after?

Have you ever felt like you were stuck somewhere between wanting to lose weight and eating the oreos, wanting to be more connected with your kids yet staring into a device once again at the dinner table or wanting to commit to a spiritual practice, but never following through?

Welcome to being HUMAN!!!!  We live with these conflictual parts inside of us each and everyday.  We find ourselves often doing things we don't want to do and don't even like-especially when we are under stress.  

This takes a huge toll on our self worth and our life.

But these parts are not who we are.  Our true Self is our God Image-the part of us that is courageous, compassionate, curious and calm.  

In this episode I explain why I don't believe we actually self sabotage and why we really aren't stuck like we think we are.  

This is one episode you won't want to miss!

Listen to Learn:

"Vague vision equals vague results." ~Krista Resnick

"The idea of stuckness seems to almost be a part of the human condition." ~Krista Resnick

"We're really not sabotaging as much as we are protecting." ~Krista Resnick

"Asking for support is one of the most courageous, courageous, brave things you can do." ~Krista Resnick

LINKS IN EPISODE:

APPLY TO WORK WITH ME

CLEAR IS KIND VISION PLANNING-BOUNDARY STYLE

Today's podcast was inspired by a question I received from a podcast listener-"Hi Krista! I've been wondering how to deal with the guilt that comes from not wanting to meet and greet elders who I no longer look up to due to their harmful behavior." Here in India, in my family, we women ought to respect and tolerate elders (even if they are mean).  I'm wondering how I can slyly get through this without much heartburn or drama!

Sound familiar?  Do you struggle with guilt?  If so, you are not alone.  We are taught from an early age to take responsibility for how other people feel.

“Susan-how do you think that made that person feel?”  "Abby, go say your sorry."  "Sarah, just look at how Debbie feels-that's terrible that you said that!"

Many times, our caregivers and parents meant well, but if our younger childhood parts experienced mis-attunement, disconnection, or were not offered the core needs of safety, love, connection, belonging, and understanding by our caregivers in childhood, an inner child wound is formed. 

This can often shows up in adulthood as a deep feeling of guilt, fear of abandonment, lack of trust, and/or self-neglect.  Guilt drives our behavior to feeling a level of obligation-committing to things and people that we aren't necessarily excited about committing to and in essence creating lives that are mediocre rather than a life coming from a place of a FULL YES!!!

Listen to Learn:

"While we can’t physically go back in time and change the past, we can be present to how our past impacts us today and choose to show up for ourselves and heal the younger parts of us that are wounded. " ~Krista Resnick

"If your younger parts experienced mis-attunement, disconnection, or were not offered the core needs of safety, love, connection, belonging, and understanding by our caregivers in childhood, an inner child wound is formed."~ Krista Resnick

"We are taught from an early age to take responsibility for how other people feel."~Krista Resnick

"Guilt has a specific purpose-it has a specific job.  Just like fear.  Fear is designed to keep us safe-don’t run toward the bear, don’t run off that cliff." ~Krista Resnick

"Guilt is designed to re-route behavior."~Krista Resnick

Links from this Episode

Application to Work with Me

Today's podcast was inspired by a listener named Jan.  Here is what she wrote-"Hi Krista, I love the holidays, but feel I end up doing most of the work, cleaning, decorating, shopping, etc and get exhausted just even thinking about it!  I don't think I get to fully enjoy the holidays as those around me get to."

This is such a common issue not only at the holidays, but in everyday life.  Many of us over-help, manage and  strive to be useful and productive at our workplaces, our homes, and in our relationships often at our own detriment.  

As a result, our needs go unmet.  We try to hint by being dropping subtle hints or even becoming passive aggressive, but to no avail-other people often don't pick up on our vague requests.  We are terrified to be honest about what's not working in the relationship because we are trying to manage someone else's feelings.  

This episode I dive into the topic of choice, needs, staying regulated and allowing yourself to feel your feelings-all really important things to acknowledge when we are doing the hard work of mastering our boundaries.  

Listen to learn:

"When we don't acknowledge the fact that we've got choice, that is the exact moment that our life goes into chaos and we become a victim of life." ~Krista Resnick

"We want to create a space- a pause before we react.  Because in these situations, we get to ask the hard questions...do we HAVE to entertain?   And do I HAVE to do ALL of the work? Is that the way that it has to be just because that's the way that it's always been done? Or could there be another possibility here? Could there be some other choices? Could there be some other alternative options that we get to take a look at?" ~Krista Resnick

"Needs are not the same as being needy.  Needy is coming from that place of your unhealed wounds. It's that 'you complete me' type energy. It's I need you to do X, Y or Z or to show up as X, Y or Z so that I can be okay. Needs come from our leadership. They come from our autonomy. They come from our sovereignty which sounds like... 'Hey, I have a need. And because I am a sovereign human being, because I love and honor myself I am asking for this need to be met." ~Krista Resnick 

LINKS:

How to Not Be So Hard On Yourself

REPLAY-Holiday Triggers & Trip-Ups

HEALTHY HOLIDAY WORKBOOK

As the holidays approach, like many of you-I too can feel a level of angst.  

Sometimes it’s as if someone has taken a small pinhole to my balloon and slowly I am leaking out my life force and vitality.  It’s hard being around family members who don’t show up in a loving, kind and conscious manner. It’s hard to be around friends and family who take zero responsibility for their hurtful behaviors.  And it’s hard to be around friends and family who want to stay stuck on the victim triangle and expect you to jump on board with them.

There are times it almost doesn’t seem worth it-to speak up, to lean into risk, but when we continue to shove everything under the rug eventually we trip, we  stumble and hurt ourselves in the process.   I believe that it’s time to get serious about that.  It’s not my job (or yours) to shove my truth deep down just to manage other people’s feelings.

When we suppress our truth, it takes us right out of our sovereignty-our aliveness-our very lifeforce.

In this episode I am sharing two very powerful mindsets to empower you to take your sovereignty back into your own hands, to experience the holidays the way that YOU desire so that you don’t have to keep waiting for your external circumstances to change.

Listen to learn:

"When we suppress our truth, it takes us right out of our own sovereignty-aliveness- our very own lifeforce." ~Krista Resnick

"The minute we forget we have choice-is the minute our life goes into chaos and we become a victim of life." ~Krista Resnick

"When we are constantly reacting-avoiding, stuffing, suppressing-who or what owns you?" ~Krista Resnick

LINKS

Replay-Holiday Triggers & Trip Ups

Replay-Healthy Holiday Boundaries Workshop

What do you want your holidays to look like, feel like this year?

Ultimately how we do anything is how we do everything-so if you don't love how your holidays feel, we have to ask-"where else is that showing up in your life?"  Where have you given your power away and ultimately believe that you don't have choice.

When we forget that we have the power of choice-we live our lives un-intentionally.  And days becomes weeks, weeks become years and years become our whole entire life!  I believe we've got to get serious about this!  So while this episode is using the holiday season as an opportunity to get clear on what actually matters to you, we can use what I'm sharing here and apply it to our entire life.  

Are you choices of what you are giving your time, energy and resources to made consciously? When you say YES to something, is that actually what you want? When you say NO to something, it that actually what you want?  Are you giving your life force to things that make you feel alive? 

This episode is one that you will want to come back to again and again as I am sharing basic principles and ideas about how to create a life by design.  

We get caught up in believing it's the big flashy moments that we grow, but it's everything in between-it's the small daily choices, habits, decisions and conversations that produce the most fruit.  

I too am reminding myself that much of what I (we) do is wildly unimportant.  Using our discernment to align to what makes us feel alive is powerful and places us right back at the helm of our leadership.  

Listen to Learn:

"I was standing in the toy aisle at Target, crying, because ultimately I felt as if I didn't have the power of choice." ~Krista Resnick

"We have to start getting serious about the fact that our entire life will pass us by if we are not intentional about it." ~Krista Resnick

"We cannot do everything." ~Krista Resnick

"Most people have this invisible obligation to things, situations, and people, pushing us to believe that ultimately, we don't have a choice." ~Krista Resnick

LINKS MENTIONED

Healthy Holidays Workshop

Healthy Holidays Workbook

REPLAY-Holiday Triggers & Trip Ups