MVC&R did not storm the Capitol on Wednesday, but as a result 4 people are dead, and another 52 have been arrested. Antifa expert, Andy Ngo, says those were not Antifa members at the Capitol, while the guy who occupied Nancy Pelosi’s office left her a quarter. Joe Scarborough is holding the cops responsible for the Capitol breach, saying they “opened the door” for rioters because they were White. A woman that stormed the Capitol was a bit surprised when she caught a face full of mace, and “mostly peaceful” is not a phrase being used to describe yesterday’s protest. Facebook will ban and delete all photos and videos of the Capitol riots, and a Texas Republican just wants the “jackasses” prosecuted. Chuck Schumer compares the Capitol siege to Pearl Harbor, and the Jeopardy champ had something to say about the woman shot and killed at the Capitol.

The Boys are not counting Electoral College votes, but both houses of Congress are convening to do just that. Researchers are looking into whether or not vitamin D can help prevent COVID, and Kid Rock donates $100K to the Barstool Sports fund for small businesses. A mayor decides to be homeless for a week to understand what needs to be done, and the last documented widow of a Civil War veteran has died. A news anchor reports a news reporter did a good job, and Chris Cuomo calls Marco Rubio, “Bible Boy.” It seems that Kamala Harris gets a big kick out of telling her ‘fweedom’ story, and President Trump tells Vice President Pence to have courage. Joy Behar and Meghan McCain go at it on The View, and the Boston Red Sox hired baseball’s first Black female coach.

MVC&R do not own CNN, but the governor of Florida officially does. President Trump and Joe Biden got head-to-head for Georgia’s runoff election, while Kamala Harris seems to have plagiarized a Martin Luther King Jr. interview. The New York Times don’t seem to have a problem with China’s version of freedom, and Dominion Voting Systems are getting ready to sue. Democrat Tulsi Gabbard blasts her party over the gender language removal, but Tom Brady and Russell Wilson changed game plans to ensure their receivers got their bonuses. The mayor of New York City speaks the truth for once, while Antifa reportedly attacks the home of GOP Senator Josh Hawley. The majority of nursing home residents have not been vaccinated, and there is quite a holdup with vaccines in Oregon. Hank Johnson believes Trump supporters should be treated like “negroes,” and apparently the Best Children's Music Grammy category is racist.

The Boys have returned, but they’re not looking for votes. President Trump had a phone call with Georgia’s Secretary of State, and the mayor of Portland figures out ANTIFA is bad. A CNN host has had too much to drink, and too much of Bill de Blasio’s hypocrisy. The Chicago Teachers Union pledges to not return to work, while a high percentage of frontline workers are refusing to take the COVID-19 vaccine. Larry King, Lou Gossett Jr., and Dawn Wells are among the latest celebrities to contract the coronavirus. A study finds eating poop can help you become healthier, and if you eat an icicle you are eating bird poop. The San Francisco DA is facing recall after basically legalizing crime, but a town in Indiana is lifting its ban on hippies after 50 years. Governor Andrew Cuomo goes full super villain because the Bills are in the playoffs, while an 88-year-old landlord is being evicted while tenants live rent free.

MVC&R think the monstrous spending is a disgrace, and so does President Trump. When asked about his son, Joe Biden refers to a reporter as a, “One horse pony.” Pfizer and the federal government have reached a massive agreement on vaccines, and Florida animal rescuers save 20 dogs from a Chinese meat market. The DOJ is suing Walmart, claiming invalid opioid prescriptions fueled the epidemic, and a lawmaker apologizes for going to a funeral. Joe Biden offers his thoughts on the new Covid relief bill, and it’s basically all McGurkin. The mayor of San Francisco is upset Kamala Harris was replaced by a man, and we’re still waiting to hear any word on an AG pick from Biden. A North Carolina official says she’ll be traveling for Christmas, after she asks residents to stay home for Christmas. Squad members rush to take credit for Trump’s suggestion of $2K checks, Trump has some bad news for Sidney Powell, then cuts her off.

The Boys don’t hate you, but Congress does. The Trump administration deserves some credit, and this is according to Joe Biden. Ilhan Omar is not too happy with lawmakers like AOC getting the Covid vaccine first, and Dr. Fauci says not to overreact to the new variant of Covid-19. Rudy Giuliani distances himself and Trump’s legal team from Sidney Powell, even as she keeps appearing at the White House. A pricey New York City private school issues an “antiracism manifesto,” and you can guess as to the outcome in that situation. Governor Andrew Cuomo claims Santa is going to be very good to him this year, while Van Morrison points out politicians, “Haven’t missed a paycheck since lockdown began.” Dr. Deborah Birx defends herself over post-Thanksgiving trip during pandemic pushback, and more Americans are traveling to Mexico’s Riviera Maya than ever before. Dave Ramsey explains why they spent $10 million to pay off debt for 8,000 people, and most Americans plan on getting a second job in 2021.

MVC&R have the details regarding the COVID relief bill, and the latest COVID variant is causing “mayhem.” Dr. Deborah Birx apparently traveled for Thanksgiving, despite her advice not to, but Dr. Anthony Fauci says Santa Claus is good to go. The mayor of New York City comes out and says, the goal is to redistribute wealth. Public schools are losing their captive audiences of children, while a CNN anchor frets about “radicalized” Republicans. Millions of Americans are still waiting for their unemployment to kick in, and America’s largest ammo manufacturer talks about the ammo shortage. California is considering a wealth tax which would continue for residents who leave the state, and Barstool’s Dave Portnoy is doing more for small businesses than Congress. The Seattle Sounders FC relief fund raises $1 million for restaurants impacted by coronavirus, and Mollie Hemingway says voters have legitimate concerns about the “very sloppy” election.

The Boys have not yet been vaccinated, but the Moderna vaccine has cleared the FDA panel hearing, and is on pace to be approved. A nurse in Tennessee passes out after receiving the COVID-19 vaccine, and a high ranking democrat praises President Trump and Operation Warp Speed. Joe Biden says it’s foul play when he is asked about his son, and a list of people who should be embarrassed about Hunter Biden. The Fed predicts a faster decline in unemployment in 2021, while a California sheriff rejects a court order to reduce inmate population, and blasts the ACLU. After sending old people there to get infected and die, Governor Andrew Cuomo will now send 80K doses of vaccine to nursing homes. A Los Angeles County DA admits he values criminals more than their victims, and also from LA, Ryan Fujitani checks in to talk cinema news. Of course, there is also The Friday Five -- Best Christmas Songs Edition.

MVC&R are not throwing away any COVID vaccine, but apparently those administering the vaccines are. Another 135k people have fled California in the past year, and the World Health Organization is finally traveling to Wuhan next month. Hunter Biden was due a ‘significant’ pay from a China firm starting in 2019, and according to Vanity Fair he is working on an art show. President Trump is urged to veto the omnibus spending bill, as House GOP members refer to it as “swamp politics.” An MSNBC host is claiming Trump took the side of COVID, while “Revenge of the Nerds” is getting a reboot. A city is facing backlash for spending federal COVID relief money on a golf course clubhouse, but a judge has ruled two strip clubs can remain open, setting their own coronavirus rules.

The Boys are optimistic about the COVID relief bill and its possibility of passing. In the spirit of unity, Joe Biden’s Chief of Staff calls Republicans a bunch of, “F---ers,” and Tom Cruise used similar language with his production crew for Mission: Impossible 7. AOC says it’s time for Chuck Schumer and Nancy Pelosi to go, but then warns of a Democratic power vacuum in their absence. The media claim Pete Buttigieg would be the first openly gay cabinet appointment, apparently completely forgetting Richard Grenell. Nearly eight million people have been pushed into poverty, and a woke San Francisco school district decides Abraham Lincoln didn’t care about blacks. Joe Biden is considering a Disney chief for Chinese Ambassador, and Governor Andrew Cuomo signs a bill banning the sale of confederate flags. Also, a nine-year-old admits to Santa she’s been naughty, but still would like to receive a PS5, and a live panda.