· 00:25 – Background. Upbringing impacted family friendly church work.

· 06:35 – Impact of children not continuing in faith after leaving the church impacted thinking.

· 09:27 – Value of marriage and family in church and society have declined. Strong families are prerequisite for strong churches and communities.

· 17:29 – Churches impact on families can be good or bad. Provide place for family in church's ministry.

· 22:58 – Family discipleship starts with Christ-centered marriage. Wife and children are top priority after God.

· 27:00 – Faith formation comes out of parenting. Healthy, godly relationships. Faith lived out naturally.

· 30:35 – Elements of a family friendly church. Look at organization chart. Family necessary for sustainability of local church. Family is engine for exponential growth. Helping nontraditional families.

· 39:25 – Parents are primary youth ministers in a church. Part of church's ministry is being a trainer of parents. Example of intentional family ministry in a church.

· 46:06 – Partnership between church and parents. Different roles. Coaching congregations given their unique circumstances. Family friendly church is multi-faceted. Not just teaching faith at home.

· 48:57 – Being intentional, systematic in church's family ministry. Scope and sequence. Seasons of year. Four year process.

· 51:48 – Vital role of pastor in family ministry. Role of champion, enabler, equipper. Not doing it all.

· 55:30 – Practices of healthy marriages. 10/10/5 rule. Time for family matters. Having fun as couple. Invest in children.

· 1:01:25 – Recommendations for being good parents. Grow in knowledge, skills, and attitudes. Quality and quantity time with children. Have a plan. Be intentional.

· 1:03:27 – Advice for single parents. Ask for help. Embrace the new normal. Helping children have positive adult relationships.

· 1:06:53 – Recommended resources. Todd Berman's, “Handing out Life”. Rob Reno's “Visionary Parenting”. National Center for Biblical Parenting. Prepare/Enrich. Family Life's “Preparing for Marriage”. Ron Deal's resources on blended families. Family and Life Survey. Be intentional about using resources.

· 1:15:26 – Concordia Center for the Family's family and marriage work with 12 million member Ethiopian Lutheran Church and Compassion International in Asia.

· 1:17:24 – Contact info at www.concordiacenterforthefamily.org

· 00:36 – Background. First involvement with marriages. Helping young married couples. Pastor of family life. Marriage Counselor. Training marriage mentor couples in churches.

· 08:23 – Difference between a marriage mentor, coach, and counselor.

· 10:04 – Developing marriage mentoring program. Mentoring is two on two discipleship. Content of marriage mentoring. Ten Topics.

· 12:31 – Biggest problem in marriages. "Idol worship." Looking to spouse to give them fulfillment, make them happy.

· 17:07 – Couples addressing own issues first.  Helping them develop new habits, skills, and practices.  Do home assignment.  Lifelong process.

· 22:46 – Train others to be marriage mentors in churches. Finding mentoring couples. Pastoral leadership is key.

· 26:44 – Recruiting and identifying potential marriage mentors.

· 30:18 – Content of marriage mentor training. Education class to learn relationship skills then Prepare/Enrich training.

· 32:38 – Biggest challenge to starting marriage mentoring program - lack of couples to mentor. Changing culture of church to support marriage.

· 37:07 – Marriage ministry is foundational to the church and to community.

· 41:45 – Components of his marriage ministry: Valentine’s Day dinner, Parents’ Night Out, marriage education class, Marriage Olympics, retreats, marriage first responders course.

· 49:25 – Utilize marriage activities to reach people outside the church.

· 50:30 – Marriage Olympics - fun, relational event.

· 52:25 – Content of marriage "advance" retreats.

· 55:51 – Getting help from others to start a marriage ministry in one's church.

· 59:22 – Steps for starting marriage ministry in one's church.

· 1:01:52 – Healthy Marriages Coalition. Ministry to reach out to community and train marriage mentors.

· 1:05:19 – Resources for marriage. People. Books. Programs courses. Keller. Tripp. Eggerich. Marriage First Responders. Personal contact information.

· 00:00 – Background and family.

· 02:09 – State of marriage and consequences for society. GK Chesterton quote.

· 07:12 – Ubiquitous understanding of marriage throughout time and societies. Destruction of family.

· 12:35 – State of marriage in church. Failure to adequately communicate purpose and nature of marriage.

· 16:19 – Vital connection between marriage/family and Christian Cultural and Great Commissions.

· 23:07 – Importance of parents and families in evangelizing, transmitting faith to their children.

· 27:23 – Importance of parents fulfilling their design through having children.

· 28:20 – Importance of marriage and family to addressing other issues facing society, e.g. crime, loss of trust, meaninglessness, etc.

· 33:26 – Priority marriage and family should have in church. Teaching nature and purpose of marriage. Premarital and care for hurting marriages/families. Role of youth pastors. Celebrating lifelong, faithful marriages.

· 38:33 – Opportunity for church to meet relational needs of community.

· 41:59 – Communicating to church leaders the importance of marriage to God. Challenges facing parents.

· 44:24 – Teaching marriage/family worldview. Start with description of creation, Bible narrative. Then discuss the “how to’s” of doing marriage.

· 47:32 – Teaching about marriage. Psalm 135, model for teaching subject, e.g. what it is and isn’t. Helpful book is Genesis of Gender. Impact of feminism. Procreational is part of marital calling.

· 51:20 – Outward focus in marriage and family, their unique calling and mission in community, deepens relationships in family.

· 53:01 – More information. www.breakpoint.org  provides commentaries on culture and Christian worldview. www.colsoncenter.org Helpful resources – Books: "Genesis of Gender “and "Strange New World", "Same Sex Marriage: A Thoughtful Approach to God's Design for Marriage."

· 00:29 – Backgrounds of Jeeva and Sulojana Sam.

· 04:35 – Personal experience with arranged marriage. Thoughts on premarital process.

· 09:28 – Experience with marriage mentoring. Going through 40 Day Marriage Dare. Working with businessmen, entrepreneurs and their marriages.

· 19:04 – Approach - focusing on individual problems not marriage problems. Dealing with past hurts and problems.

· 24:22 – Approach to marriage mentoring. Helping troubled marriages. 12 sessions. Available 24/7. Money back guaranteed.

· 28:01 – Changing spiritual atmosphere of marriage. Marriage is like a greenhouse.

· 30:26 – Spiritual atmosphere habits - Praying together. Journaling. Bible study. Share gratitude for spouse. Developing habits over 63 days.

· 39:53 – Three months of follow up.

· 41:38 – Spiritual blockages. Use of HALT Method to control negative thoughts. Key importance of forgiveness of others and oneself. Stop judgments. Break ungodly ties.

· 49:28 – Proper alignment in marriage. Ephesians 5. Responsibility. Self-sacrificing example of Christ. Make decisions together.

· 57:14 – Communication. Listening skills. Transparency in relationship.

· 1:03:18 – Conflict resolution. Healthy conflict.  Forgiveness. Apologize. Reconciliation.

· 1:07:33 – Sexual relationship. Lack of intimacy is barometer of marriage relationship. Transparency. Emotional connection. Problem of pornography and harm to marriage relationship. Scheduling sexual intimacy time.

· 1:17:52 – Scheduling time together. Date time each week.

· 1:19:57 – Finances. Having a budget. Be transparent. Get out of debt. Go through Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University.

· 1:22:07 – Particular struggle areas - bad communication, conflict, conflict over finances, lack of affection. Symptoms of root problems. Build a good foundation, framework in marriage.

· 1:24:21 – Information on Unbreakable Marriage book by Sam’s. Available on Amazon. Website at www.sams.ca

· 1:25:25 – Bigger vision for marriage mentoring ministry - See 50,000 couples mentored. Train other mentors through online course. Advice - Put God at center of marriage and don't wait to get help.

· 00:30 –  Background. Interest in law. Path to marriage ministry.  

· 04:09 – Marriage ministry passions - counseling, events, and helping couples honor their marriages.

· 06:44 – Practical steps for helping other couples. Pray for specific couple. Reach out and befriend a couple. Take out for coffee. Babysit for younger couples.

· 11:11 –  Major challenges facing couples. Busyness. Disconnected. Remedy - daily check in times with spouse.

· 14:58 – Questions for connecting. Asking about highs and lows of day. How are relationships with friends and family members. Find conversation starter questions for spouse on Internet. Keep on phone.

· 19:03 – Daily practices to strengthen marriage - daily check in times. Greet with affection. Quick prayer times,

· 26:46 – Working on marriage when spouse isn't interested.

· 31:10 – Seeking help for marriage. Find couple you respect. Talk with them. Focus on Family has list of vetted marriage counselors.

· 34:57 – How to start a marriage ministry in church. Training up mentors to take burden off pastors. Cultivate openness about marriage struggles in church. Couples share marriage stories in church.

· 40:49 – How to approach pastor when offering to help with marriage ministry in church.

· 44:59 – Praying for a couple to support and invest in. Invite to home. Tell story. Be honest with struggles. Read marriage book as couples.

· 48:08 – Resources Greg recommends:  Tim Keller, Meaning of Marriage. Gary Chapman, Five Love Languages. Les and Leslie Parrott books. Julie Slattery ministry, “Authentic Intimacy”. Greg and Erin Smalley, Fight Your Way to a Better Marriage.

· 49:44 – Focus on the Family's free marriage assessment. Shows strengths and growth areas. Take and discuss with another couple. www.family.com, go to marriage section.

· 50:50 – Essence of honoring marriage as a couple.