This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot, I act like the famous, late fashion designer Karl Lagerfeld, by ruining what should be a nice quiet evening watching television.

This is Rob Long, and on today’s Martini Shot I present my ID to the guard at the studio gate and wait to be waved through, and when I am, I’m elated, but also a little disappointed because, well, now I gotta have the meeting.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I talk about what it must be like to be down a well and to look up and see the stars, and why a place I know in Hollywood is trying to do something like that for homeless youth.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I learn what a keynote speaker is, and I learn that it’s someone who can just talk about anything and make it seem like it’s about work. Sounds like my kind of job.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot although I am not technically a licensed pilot I do pilot a plane to takeoff. A real plane. Into the sky. But I do not land it, as my presence here proves.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I decide to pitch a show that I’m pretty sure won’t ever get made, but I do like the title: "Liza Minelli, Private Detective."

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I break the first rule of show business, which is "Nobody Pays for Homework". It’s basically a history lesson.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I wear a jacket to a party and someone tells me it looks good and then asks if it’s vintage. No, I say, I am vintage. The jacket is just the jacket.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I discover that there’s a place where slightly used but still sought-after brands can be bought for cheap. It’s the RealReal, the YouTube of retailers.

This is Rob Long and on today’s Martini Shot I remember a few weeks ago, when videos of unidentified aerial phenomena surfaced, and the Navy said, yeah, those were UFOs, and then we all went Huh and moved on, instead of freaking out like every single science fiction movie predicted.