The Circuit of Success Podcast with Brett Gilliland

Mastering Mental Performance with Kevin DeShazo


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Unlock the keys to success with Kevin DeShazo in this empowering episode of the Circuit of Success podcast. Join host Brett Gilliland as they delve into mental performance mastery, exploring pivotal topics like student-athletes transferring schools, decision-making grounded in knowledge, and the art of disciplined commitment. Discover the transformative impact of self-talk and the strategy of stacking small successes as Kevin shares insights into personal growth and development. “The power of self-talk is so important,” Kevin asserts, emphasizing its role as the language shaping our success. Kevin advocates for pushing beyond comfort zones to foster growth in this conversation. Gain valuable tips on learning from past leaders, making decisions without emotion, and preparing for adversity. Kevin’s wisdom extends to the significance of reading diverse perspectives, following engaging figures on social media, and immersing oneself in insightful books. This episode serves as a compelling reminder to reflect on your goals and dreams, taking actionable steps towards realizing them. By integrating practices like self-talk, stacking small successes, and embracing continuous learning, listeners can enhance their confidence and resilience, making tomorrow better than today. Tune in to this Circuit of Success podcast episode and embark on a journey of self-discovery, empowerment, and tangible strategies for achieving lasting success.

Mastering Mental Performance

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Welcome to the Circuit of Success.

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I’m your host Brett Gilliland in today.

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I’ve got Kevin DeShazo with me, Kevin. How

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you doing?

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Fantastic. How are you? I am good. How’s,

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Oklahoma City treating you today?

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It’s great.

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Not too wintery of weather yet. It’s actually

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pretty nice. So it’s a it’s good Monday.

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Awesome. It’s a little chilly and rainy here,

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but it it could be a lot worse.

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So that’s our item. I’m just outside of

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Saint Louis.

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And, so you are in Oklahoma City.

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You are the father of three boys. We

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both have something in common. We both have

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an asher.

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And you are married and running some businesses.

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Certified mental performance,

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mastery coach and founded, field house, media.

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And, we’ll talk about some other stuff as

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well. So, before we get started though, Kevin,

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could you just give us a little lay

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of the land? What’s made you the man

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you are today and what’s some of the

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backstory for you?

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Oh, what is that’s a big question. What

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has made me the man I am seeing?

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Probably who has made me the man I

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am seeing?

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You know, I’ve I’ve been really fortunate to

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have great mentors, great people,

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in my life from a a young age.

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And I think the the two things I’ve

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learned probably the most from from all those

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mentors combined is one, the power of speaking

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belief in the people. These are always people

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who believed something in me. Saw something in

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me, called those things up in me,

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treated me as if I I’ve I’ve already

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was those things

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and two, just the, their, the way they

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modeled their life. Right? They were people who

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were accountable. They were disciplined. They were consistent.

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What’s it was important to me. They were

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they were all rooted in faith.

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So they were good husbands, good dads, good

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business people, whatever their job was.

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And so I’ve always had had good mentors.

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And then over the years, you know, I

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went into the corporate world right out of

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college. Well, that’s not true.

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Don’t have to go down this down down

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this revolt, but I was I was an

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embalmer’s assistant for six months immediately out of

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college. Wow.

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Then then went into the corporate world. Then

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started my own business,

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and businesses. And so lots of ups and

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downs of peaks and valleys and failures and

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successes,

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think all those things, all those experiences, the

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wins and losses, you know, they they each

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kinda mold you into. If you allow them

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to, if you use them the right way,

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they mold you into,

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who you’re supposed to be. Yeah. And you

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grew up in Oklahoma?

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Mostly, I was in Missouri, until sixth grade.

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And so I moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma,

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right after I finished sixth grade, and dinner,

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Oklahoma since then. Nice. And doing some work

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with Oklahoma, the university. Right? That’s right. Yeah.

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We we do a lot with their athletic

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department, both from their administration, you know, jokes

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to Leon, their athletic director, their leadership team,

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their department,

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but also work with a lot of their

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sports teams,

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worked deeply with football team, travel with the

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football team. So it’s a it’s it’s a

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fun a fun client to have. Yeah. So

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speaking of football, so how did,

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how did you think it went last night?

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They picked the top four teams.

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Well, Florida State’s also a client. Yeah. Oh.

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So so so didn’t didn’t love them being

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left out.

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You know, it’s it’s a there’s probably a

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bigger societal perspective to take on it, but

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it was

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you know, the committee went, in my opinion,

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they went on feelings based on that I

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rather rather than based on facts.

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I just think it’s tough to leave,

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a Power five undefeated team

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out, you know,

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in in place of teams who have who

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have lost skin. Now for that fourth spot,

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I think there could be a lot of

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argument. Whether it’s Bamba or Georgia or Texas

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or

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even Ohio State, you know, they’re only lost

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being to Michigan. There’s a lot of argument

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for that fourth spot, but my opinion, Florida

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State should have been should have been a

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guarantee. Yep. Yeah. It’s tough. And I guess

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next year going to what? Ten teams or

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twelve teams, whatever they’re doing next year. Yeah.

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Twelve will change from that. But then you’ll

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still have the thirteenth team. That’ll be mad.

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That’s right. And, That’s right. That’s where I

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go because you’re right. It’s like the twelve

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team solves

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this discussion in terms of, like, okay. They

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would have all had a chance.

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And and I’ve been, you know, hoping and

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waiting for this this twelve team for a

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while because I my general opinion is if

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you’re in the top 08:10, maybe twelve,

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you probably have a good chance, like, to

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win a national, like, a national title. You’ve

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got some talent. You’re you’re pretty elite.

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There’s not always. Some years, there’s a massive

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difference, but typically that that one to eight,

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one to ten gap is not very wide.

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Once you get thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, say, okay,

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you’ve probably lost two or three games. It’s

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like you’ve had enough of a chance

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But it’ll be but there’s always gonna be

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someone who feels left out. Right? And whether

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there were thirty teams, right, someone’s gonna feel

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left out. Yep. Yeah. Well, you look at,

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like, Liberty, I saw the twelfth team, I

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think, liberty.

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And then you got, like, LSU on the

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thirteenth.

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Oh, wow.

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So the thirteenth team was LSUU. You look

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at the difference of who they’re all playing,

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you know, a little bit different deal there.

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So so, And and Liberty Liberty go to

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play Oregon. So that’ll be interesting. Yeah.

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Yeah. Who who are you guys playing?

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We’ve got Arizona. Will be a great I

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mean, Arizona, they’ve won, like, five straight, I

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believe.

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Mhmm. And then when you add all the

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transfer portal, so our quarterback just announced today,

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he’s leaving

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as a grad transfer, we’ve got a we’ve

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got a guy who’s who’s playing behind him,

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who was ready. And he this year was

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kind of a mentoring year for him. Talked

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about great leadership.

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But portal season,

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people transferring, coaches, moving around. So it’ll be

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interesting.

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Yeah. It’s crazy. I saw today the, so

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Ohio States play in Missouri,

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and they’ve already announced, like, their quarterbacks leaving

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Ohio State’s quarterback leaving. They had, like, I

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don’t know. Five or six guys already say

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they’re not playing in the game. It’s, like,

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it’s wild. It’s wild.

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Yeah. Yeah. So so how do we fix

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that? The societal problem of of this. Right?

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What I worry about with the, the transfer

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portal and all that stuff as accountability

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is kids these days can run from Right?

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Because if I hold you accountable Gilliland

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you don’t like that, well, then what are

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you gonna do? You’re just gonna take your

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bag and you’re gonna take the ball and

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go home. Right? So so what are your

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thoughts on and then how do we fix

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that issue?

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Yeah. It’s really interesting.

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I think transferring is fine.

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I liked the old way where you had

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to sit out for a season because that

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made you have to really think, like, okay.

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Am I do I really wanna go somewhere?

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Am I really that unhappy?

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That I’m willing to go sit for a

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year and lose development, lose playing time, lose

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putting myself on tape. If I think I’m

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good enough to go to the NFL, or

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MBA, whatever it may be.

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And so I I think there has to

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be some form of consequence,

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so to speak, transferring to cause them to

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to pause a little bit, which I think

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is is now come back. Now you can

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transfer

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once freely, but the second time I think

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now you have to sit out. Something along

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those lines. Okay.

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Or or some situation where you have to

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get a waiver. I mean, I think just

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allowing kids to transfer

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You know, when I was eighteen, I knew

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nothing. I should not have been making decisions

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for my life or my career at at

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eighteen because it would have all been based

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on how I the moment. And if someone

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does something I don’t like, well, this coach

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is against me. They’re being a jerk. Like,

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no, this is called discipline and accountability. And

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this is what growth looks like.

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So I think we’ve we’ve got a what’s

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interesting is the person who gets hurt the

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most in this are the student athletes. They

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think it’s helping the student athletes. They’re the

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ones who get hurt the worst. Because they

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all go on the Gilliland then, you know,

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whatever the number is, forty five, fifty percent

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have nowhere to go.

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There there’s no spot. So they think they’re

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going to greener pastures, and there’s nothing. And

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they go from a, you know, it could

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be an Oklahoma State to a division two

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or division three school or a low level,

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group of five, you know, division one school.

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It’s like, wait a minute. I was in

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the Big twelve. And now I’m

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at at, you know, the bottom of the

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pack in the sun belt or whatever it

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may be. Yeah.

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So I think that’s that’s part of it.

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I think we need to change the timing

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they they had a few portal windows, but

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doing it right now,

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when one coaches football coaches from December first

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to December sixteenth is an is an open

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period for recruiting. So they’re visiting all these

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high school kids,

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for the next two weeks while trying to

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keep their current roster here

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while trying to prepare for a bowl game.

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And signing day

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is in the next two to three weeks,

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like, the the main signing day. So then

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all this is happening in a matter of

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three weeks. And it’s just utter chaos,

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for everyone. And so to say, wait a

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minute. Like, we’ve gotta calm down with the

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opt outs of bowl games with being able

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to transfer

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there’s gotta be value in finishing what you

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started.

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And and if you wanna transfer, that’s okay.

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It might you might be in the wrong

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situation. Right? They may have fired your coach.

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You’re like, man, I don’t buy into the

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new coach. Like, this is not what I

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was here for. There’s always situations,

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but I do think there has to be

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a better process where it benefits everyone.

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Yeah. I’ve talked to coaches, you know, it’s

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it’s tough because now they’re having to recruit

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the same kids. They’ve already recruited Right? And

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so if it doesn’t get me easier. And

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that that whole accountability thing, like I mentioned,

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is what what worries me. And

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I don’t know. You worry about I worry

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about this. I mean, I’m just getting to

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be the old dad. You worry about, like,

00:08:57.000 –> 00:08:59.000

chat, GPT. I worry about that stuff. Like,

00:08:59.000 –> 00:09:01.000

is that gonna take away critical thinking from

00:09:01.000 –> 00:09:02.000

our kids?

00:09:02.000 –> 00:09:05.000

Right. Right. All that Gilliland so that’s probably

00:09:05.000 –> 00:09:06.000

a whole another podcast. But,

00:09:07.000 –> 00:09:09.000

so you are a big reader, I see.

00:09:09.000 –> 00:09:11.000

And so talk to me about that. So,

00:09:11.000 –> 00:09:11.000

obviously,

00:09:11.000 –> 00:09:14.000

I think it’s a a big important thing

00:09:14.000 –> 00:09:15.000

that people obviously need to do, but talk

00:09:15.000 –> 00:09:16.000

to me about what you get from it,

00:09:16.000 –> 00:09:18.000

what’s your process like, kind of books you

00:09:18.000 –> 00:09:19.000

recommend.

00:09:20.000 –> 00:09:21.000

I just think, you know, I fell in

00:09:21.000 –> 00:09:23.000

love with reading at a young age. I

00:09:23.000 –> 00:09:25.000

mean, in kindergarten, I was reading six grade

00:09:25.000 –> 00:09:27.000

level books and couldn’t couldn’t get enough. I

00:09:27.000 –> 00:09:28.000

just loved reading.

00:09:29.000 –> 00:09:31.000

And then you know, kinda as as school

00:09:31.000 –> 00:09:32.000

tends to do, I was forced to read.

00:09:32.000 –> 00:09:34.000

And so I lost kind of the love

00:09:34.000 –> 00:09:35.000

and and passion for it when I didn’t

00:09:35.000 –> 00:09:37.000

have a have a choice in when I

00:09:37.000 –> 00:09:38.000

was getting to read and when I read

00:09:38.000 –> 00:09:38.000

it.

00:09:39.000 –> 00:09:40.000

But I’d say in the last 10:15 years,

00:09:40.000 –> 00:09:42.000

I’ve just kinda rediscovered that passion.

00:09:43.000 –> 00:09:45.000

It sparks ideas. It’s a good way for

00:09:45.000 –> 00:09:47.000

me to to it’s it’s a weird combination

00:09:47.000 –> 00:09:49.000

of shutting off my brain, but also turning

00:09:49.000 –> 00:09:50.000

on my brain. Right? I can shut it

00:09:50.000 –> 00:09:52.000

off from my day to day and things

00:09:52.000 –> 00:09:52.000

that,

00:09:53.000 –> 00:09:55.000

cause stress or I’m building or need to

00:09:55.000 –> 00:09:57.000

think about, but it allows me think about

00:09:57.000 –> 00:09:59.000

new things, and think about the things I’m

00:09:59.000 –> 00:10:01.000

doing maybe in a in a different way.

00:10:01.000 –> 00:10:03.000

And I just I don’t know who who

00:10:03.000 –> 00:10:05.000

the original quote, where it’s from, but, you

00:10:05.000 –> 00:10:07.000

know, leaders are readers. And I just think

00:10:07.000 –> 00:10:09.000

that’s we we have to be reading. We

00:10:09.000 –> 00:10:11.000

can’t be stagnant just because I know what

00:10:11.000 –> 00:10:12.000

I’m doing in this lane today,

00:10:13.000 –> 00:10:15.000

doesn’t mean I know much about tomorrow or

00:10:15.000 –> 00:10:17.000

these other areas. And so I think trying

00:10:17.000 –> 00:10:19.000

to be well read, and trying to model

00:10:19.000 –> 00:10:20.000

that for my kids. Like, it’s just a

00:10:20.000 –> 00:10:23.000

good way to to slow down. Fortunately so

00:10:23.000 –> 00:10:25.000

far, my kids love reading. My fourteen year

00:10:25.000 –> 00:10:27.000

old, you know, we’ll go to Florida in

00:10:27.000 –> 00:10:28.000

the summer, and it’s probably, I don’t know,

00:10:28.000 –> 00:10:31.000

ten hour drive, twelve hour drive, and he’ll

00:10:31.000 –> 00:10:32.000

he’ll read an entire book, you know, just

00:10:32.000 –> 00:10:33.000

sit in the back of the car. We

00:10:33.000 –> 00:10:35.000

won’t hear from him the whole trip. He’s

00:10:35.000 –> 00:10:36.000

just got his his his head in the

00:10:36.000 –> 00:10:37.000

book. And,

00:10:37.000 –> 00:10:38.000

and, and he loves it. I mean, he

00:10:38.000 –> 00:10:39.000

read one year

00:10:40.000 –> 00:10:43.000

all the Harry Potter books from Christmas to

00:10:43.000 –> 00:10:43.000

February.

00:10:44.000 –> 00:10:47.000

Wow. Just just sat down and and yeah.

00:10:48.000 –> 00:10:49.000

And so I, yeah, I just think it’s

00:10:49.000 –> 00:10:51.000

such a valuable thing and and part of

00:10:51.000 –> 00:10:51.000

it.

00:10:52.000 –> 00:10:53.000

You know, I don’t know if I just

00:10:53.000 –> 00:10:54.000

think this or if this is true, but

00:10:54.000 –> 00:10:56.000

I think as a society in general, we

00:10:56.000 –> 00:10:56.000

don’t read enough.

00:10:57.000 –> 00:10:59.000

Social media doesn’t count. Right? Like, Twitter is

00:10:59.000 –> 00:11:00.000

not reading.

00:11:00.000 –> 00:11:02.000

And and so I think we we just

00:11:02.000 –> 00:11:05.000

kinda lost the the value that the books

00:11:05.000 –> 00:11:07.000

bring historical books, new books, And so I

00:11:07.000 –> 00:11:09.000

I like all topics. That’s probably not fair.

00:11:10.000 –> 00:11:12.000

I love reading leadership books. I love reading

00:11:12.000 –> 00:11:14.000

business books. I love history of getting getting

00:11:14.000 –> 00:11:16.000

more and more into older history books and

00:11:16.000 –> 00:11:19.000

seeing what leaders of the past did. Right?

00:11:19.000 –> 00:11:20.000

There there’s nothing new under the sun. So

00:11:20.000 –> 00:11:22.000

we can come up with with all these

00:11:22.000 –> 00:11:23.000

new leadership books today, but

00:11:24.000 –> 00:11:26.000

what did people do in the early nineteen

00:11:26.000 –> 00:11:28.000

hundreds and the eighteen hundred. Like, what were

00:11:28.000 –> 00:11:30.000

they thinking? Those those principles still matter, you

00:11:30.000 –> 00:11:31.000

know, so so learning from leaders of the

00:11:31.000 –> 00:11:32.000

past.

00:11:32.000 –> 00:11:34.000

Love it. Love it. You got a book

00:11:34.000 –> 00:11:35.000

right there behind you. I can see that

00:11:35.000 –> 00:11:38.000

one right there. Keep keep chopping wood.

00:11:38.000 –> 00:11:40.000

Yep. Right? So tell me about that.

00:11:41.000 –> 00:11:42.000

It was really interesting.

00:11:43.000 –> 00:11:45.000

So kind of the backstory on it. It

00:11:45.000 –> 00:11:48.000

was a Saturday night in January, and and

00:11:48.000 –> 00:11:50.000

it was freezing outside, like snow on the

00:11:50.000 –> 00:11:51.000

ground type freezing.

00:11:52.000 –> 00:11:54.000

And at the time, we lived in about

00:11:54.000 –> 00:11:55.000

a hundred and five year old house in

00:11:55.000 –> 00:11:57.000

downtown Oklahoma City.

00:11:57.000 –> 00:11:59.000

We’ve recently moved,

00:11:59.000 –> 00:12:02.000

just general life advice for anyone listening. Don’t

00:12:02.000 –> 00:12:04.000

move between Christmas and New Year’s. Like, that’s

00:12:04.000 –> 00:12:06.000

a great test of your marriage.

00:12:06.000 –> 00:12:08.000

We passed, thankfully.

00:12:08.000 –> 00:12:10.000

But so at the time we lived in

00:12:10.000 –> 00:12:11.000

a hundred and five year old home, and,

00:12:11.000 –> 00:12:13.000

you know, the windows were

00:12:13.000 –> 00:12:15.000

were less than paper thin.

00:12:15.000 –> 00:12:17.000

And my neighbor had a wood burning fireplace.

00:12:18.000 –> 00:12:19.000

And so we’re sitting there watching TV one

00:12:19.000 –> 00:12:21.000

night, and I can smell his fireplace burning.

00:12:22.000 –> 00:12:24.000

You know, my brain goes weird places, and

00:12:24.000 –> 00:12:27.000

I’m like, wonder? Like, wonder where firewood comes

00:12:27.000 –> 00:12:29.000

from? Like, what’s the process? Like, what how

00:12:29.000 –> 00:12:30.000

does that how does it get from tree

00:12:30.000 –> 00:12:32.000

to fireplace? Like, what does that look like?

00:12:32.000 –> 00:12:34.000

And and so I’ve googled it. Obviously, it’s

00:12:34.000 –> 00:12:37.000

not sound like secret process. I think government

00:12:37.000 –> 00:12:39.000

is not trying to prevent us from knowing

00:12:39.000 –> 00:12:41.000

what this looks like. And so I I

00:12:41.000 –> 00:12:43.000

what I found was

00:12:43.000 –> 00:12:43.000

that

00:12:44.000 –> 00:12:46.000

that the wood my neighbor was burning was

00:12:46.000 –> 00:12:48.000

not from that morning. It wasn’t from earlier

00:12:48.000 –> 00:12:50.000

in the week. That wood goes through this.

00:12:50.000 –> 00:12:52.000

It’s called seasoning, but it’s essentially just drying

00:12:52.000 –> 00:12:54.000

out. Wood has to dry out. It could

00:12:54.000 –> 00:12:56.000

be six, 09:12, fifteen months depending on the

00:12:56.000 –> 00:12:57.000

wood.

00:12:57.000 –> 00:12:59.000

In order for it to be ready for

00:12:59.000 –> 00:13:00.000

the fireplace in order for it to be

00:13:00.000 –> 00:13:03.000

be useful. Same thing if anyone listening, you

00:13:03.000 –> 00:13:04.000

know, you you go camping, well, if you

00:13:04.000 –> 00:13:05.000

try to light what

00:13:06.000 –> 00:13:08.000

firewood or your campsite, it’s not gonna work

00:13:08.000 –> 00:13:09.000

out. So same concept.

00:13:10.000 –> 00:13:11.000

And so I’m like, oh, interesting. Well, that

00:13:11.000 –> 00:13:13.000

means somebody had to be out in, like,

00:13:13.000 –> 00:13:16.000

March getting that firewood. You know, this wasn’t,

00:13:16.000 –> 00:13:17.000

like, earlier this week or earlier in the

00:13:17.000 –> 00:13:19.000

month, or this was months ago when they

00:13:19.000 –> 00:13:22.000

didn’t need it. That’s interesting. And so that

00:13:22.000 –> 00:13:24.000

made me think of culture and leadership and

00:13:24.000 –> 00:13:26.000

this process of of getting better.

00:13:26.000 –> 00:13:28.000

And so I just fired off a tweet

00:13:28.000 –> 00:13:29.000

as I typically do and,

00:13:30.000 –> 00:13:31.000

went to bed. Tell my wife’s, like, I

00:13:31.000 –> 00:13:33.000

think I found the idea of my next

00:13:33.000 –> 00:13:34.000

book. And she’s like, I’m sure you did

00:13:34.000 –> 00:13:36.000

because this is a seven times a week.

00:13:36.000 –> 00:13:38.000

I think I have an idea for a

00:13:38.000 –> 00:13:38.000

new book.

00:13:39.000 –> 00:13:40.000

And and so I woke up and it

00:13:40.000 –> 00:13:42.000

had kinda blown up a little bit. Like,

00:13:42.000 –> 00:13:44.000

okay. Interesting. That that resonated, which that’s a

00:13:44.000 –> 00:13:46.000

lot of what social media is for me

00:13:46.000 –> 00:13:48.000

is just putting out thoughts to see what

00:13:48.000 –> 00:13:49.000

resonates, what connects,

00:13:50.000 –> 00:13:52.000

and that one did. And so then I

00:13:52.000 –> 00:13:53.000

I have a a newsletter that I write

00:13:53.000 –> 00:13:55.000

for leaders every day.

00:13:55.000 –> 00:13:56.000

Used that story

00:13:56.000 –> 00:13:58.000

in my newsletter. So that was on a

00:13:58.000 –> 00:14:00.000

Saturday. Use this the story of my newsletter

00:14:00.000 –> 00:14:02.000

on a Monday. And I don’t usually get

00:14:02.000 –> 00:14:05.000

responses on the newsletter. It’s not designed to

00:14:05.000 –> 00:14:07.000

get responses. It’s just designed to serve people.

00:14:07.000 –> 00:14:09.000

Like, here’s a thought, here’s a thing. And

00:14:09.000 –> 00:14:12.000

I probably got fifty, sixty responses of, and

00:14:12.000 –> 00:14:13.000

I printed this off and gave it to

00:14:13.000 –> 00:14:14.000

my whole team. And I gave this to

00:14:14.000 –> 00:14:16.000

my son. I mean, like, okay. Two for

00:14:16.000 –> 00:14:17.000

two. There’s something there.

00:14:18.000 –> 00:14:20.000

And our office is above a coffee shop

00:14:20.000 –> 00:14:22.000

here in downtown Oklahoma City. And so that

00:14:22.000 –> 00:14:23.000

Tuesday morning came in,

00:14:24.000 –> 00:14:25.000

which the copy shop put some headphones in

00:14:25.000 –> 00:14:28.000

and four hours later, there it was. Wow.

00:14:28.000 –> 00:14:30.000

And that sounds impressive. It’s not it’s, like,

00:14:30.000 –> 00:14:32.000

nine thousand words. It’s not like I wrote

00:14:32.000 –> 00:14:34.000

a forty thousand word novel. It’s nine thousand

00:14:34.000 –> 00:14:36.000

words. You you can read it in about

00:14:36.000 –> 00:14:36.000

thirty minutes.

00:14:37.000 –> 00:14:39.000

But, yeah, still wrote it that that day

00:14:39.000 –> 00:14:41.000

and published it a few months later. That’s

00:14:41.000 –> 00:14:43.000

beautiful. So how many total books have you

00:14:43.000 –> 00:14:43.000

written?

00:14:45.000 –> 00:14:46.000

Three.

00:14:48.000 –> 00:14:50.000

I just finished the fourth. I’ve got a

00:14:50.000 –> 00:14:52.000

new one that I’m I’m working on. But

00:14:52.000 –> 00:14:53.000

I wrote one. So so one of my

00:14:53.000 –> 00:14:56.000

first businesses I started was called Fieldhouse Media,

00:14:56.000 –> 00:14:58.000

and it was doing social media training for

00:14:58.000 –> 00:14:59.000

college athletes and coaches

00:14:59.000 –> 00:15:01.000

And so I wrote a book called eye

00:15:01.000 –> 00:15:03.000

athlete, which is really about helping coaches understand

00:15:03.000 –> 00:15:05.000

this generation of of student athlete.

00:15:06.000 –> 00:15:08.000

Don’t recommend that one. It was more of

00:15:08.000 –> 00:15:10.000

one is terribly, rewritten. But it was more

00:15:10.000 –> 00:15:12.000

of, like, to establish myself as the thought

00:15:12.000 –> 00:15:14.000

leader kind of in that space.

00:15:14.000 –> 00:15:16.000

And then I wrote a book called Leadershipinterrupted,

00:15:17.000 –> 00:15:19.000

which took three hundred and sixty five of

00:15:19.000 –> 00:15:21.000

my daily emails and just kinda put them

00:15:21.000 –> 00:15:23.000

in. It’s almost like leadership devotional style. It’s

00:15:23.000 –> 00:15:24.000

like every day is a thought for for

00:15:24.000 –> 00:15:25.000

leaders.

00:15:25.000 –> 00:15:27.000

And then keep chopping wood. And then I’ve

00:15:27.000 –> 00:15:28.000

got a new one that I’m working on,

00:15:28.000 –> 00:15:30.000

called into the storm about how to deal

00:15:30.000 –> 00:15:31.000

with adversity.

00:15:32.000 –> 00:15:33.000

Love it. Love it. So let’s talk about

00:15:33.000 –> 00:15:35.000

that. How do we deal with adversity? What’s,

00:15:35.000 –> 00:15:37.000

what’s your game plan there? Cause there’s a

00:15:37.000 –> 00:15:38.000

lot of it right now.

00:15:39.000 –> 00:15:41.000

There is. And so I think

00:15:41.000 –> 00:15:44.000

so here, this story, it’s not original story,

00:15:44.000 –> 00:15:46.000

but how I’m how I’m framing is is

00:15:46.000 –> 00:15:48.000

in in an original way. But I was

00:15:48.000 –> 00:15:50.000

at Florida State, a year and a half

00:15:50.000 –> 00:15:50.000

ago,

00:15:51.000 –> 00:15:53.000

and they were introducing the new CEO

00:15:54.000 –> 00:15:56.000

of of seminal boosters. So it’s like their

00:15:56.000 –> 00:15:58.000

fundraising arm kind of for for athletics. It’s

00:15:58.000 –> 00:15:59.000

its own separate organization.

00:16:00.000 –> 00:16:00.000

And

00:16:01.000 –> 00:16:03.000

Steven Ponder, the CEO, he told the story

00:16:03.000 –> 00:16:04.000

of of,

00:16:05.000 –> 00:16:06.000

when storms come over the mountains, like in

00:16:06.000 –> 00:16:08.000

the rocky mountains, they come from the west

00:16:08.000 –> 00:16:10.000

to the east. And he said, what happens

00:16:10.000 –> 00:16:12.000

is cows, they sense storm. They know it’s

00:16:12.000 –> 00:16:14.000

coming and fear sets in. They say, we

00:16:14.000 –> 00:16:15.000

gotta get to safety. We gotta get out

00:16:15.000 –> 00:16:17.000

of here. And so cows turn and run

00:16:17.000 –> 00:16:19.000

east, away from the storm. They wanna get

00:16:19.000 –> 00:16:22.000

away from it. And cows are dumb and

00:16:22.000 –> 00:16:24.000

slow. And so what happens is they get

00:16:24.000 –> 00:16:26.000

stuck in the storm. The frustration,

00:16:27.000 –> 00:16:29.000

the obstacles, the anxiety, the

00:16:29.000 –> 00:16:31.000

fear, their frustration

00:16:31.000 –> 00:16:34.000

until eventually the storm runs out. Right? But

00:16:34.000 –> 00:16:36.000

they’re just going with the storm until eventually

00:16:36.000 –> 00:16:37.000

it passes them because every storm runs out

00:16:37.000 –> 00:16:38.000

of

00:16:38.000 –> 00:16:40.000

And so, but by the time they the

00:16:40.000 –> 00:16:43.000

storm passes, they’ve lost ground. It’s like, wait

00:16:43.000 –> 00:16:45.000

a minute. We were already over here. Now

00:16:45.000 –> 00:16:47.000

we’ve run away. We’ve gotta do all this

00:16:47.000 –> 00:16:49.000

work just to get back to where we

00:16:49.000 –> 00:16:50.000

were. We thought we were getting to safety.

00:16:50.000 –> 00:16:53.000

We actually made things worse, and we prolonged

00:16:53.000 –> 00:16:55.000

our suffering, prolong the frustration,

00:16:55.000 –> 00:16:57.000

prolong the adversity,

00:16:57.000 –> 00:16:59.000

Meanwhile, Bison,

00:16:59.000 –> 00:17:01.000

fun fact, there are no buffalo in North

00:17:01.000 –> 00:17:04.000

America. So Colorado needs a new mascot.

00:17:04.000 –> 00:17:07.000

But bison in in Colorado and in the

00:17:07.000 –> 00:17:09.000

mountains, when the storm comes over, they sense

00:17:09.000 –> 00:17:11.000

it as well. And they say, great. Let’s

00:17:11.000 –> 00:17:13.000

go through it. So instead of running away

00:17:13.000 –> 00:17:15.000

from it, Bison go into the storm. Head

00:17:15.000 –> 00:17:18.000

first, step after step, they make progress.

00:17:18.000 –> 00:17:21.000

They still experience it because you can’t avoid

00:17:21.000 –> 00:17:22.000

the storm. Right? I think most most of

00:17:22.000 –> 00:17:23.000

the issues in life is like we keep

00:17:23.000 –> 00:17:25.000

trying to avoid adversity, and you can’t. It’s

00:17:25.000 –> 00:17:26.000

guaranteed.

00:17:27.000 –> 00:17:29.000

And and when when we accept that, we

00:17:29.000 –> 00:17:31.000

say, okay. If adversity’s gonna hit, I can’t

00:17:31.000 –> 00:17:33.000

choose what it is. I can’t choose, like,

00:17:33.000 –> 00:17:35.000

I don’t know if I’m gonna get sick.

00:17:35.000 –> 00:17:36.000

I don’t know if I’m gonna lose a

00:17:36.000 –> 00:17:38.000

loved one, but I know that adversity is

00:17:38.000 –> 00:17:39.000

gonna come at some point. So if I

00:17:39.000 –> 00:17:42.000

if I expect it, I can mentally be

00:17:42.000 –> 00:17:43.000

prepared for. And I can choose to do

00:17:43.000 –> 00:17:45.000

some hard things along the way in life

00:17:45.000 –> 00:17:46.000

to actually prepare me for the the the

00:17:46.000 –> 00:17:49.000

adversity that shows up. And so they realize,

00:17:49.000 –> 00:17:50.000

like, one, we can’t avoid the adversity and

00:17:50.000 –> 00:17:53.000

two, only way through it is through it.

00:17:53.000 –> 00:17:54.000

And when you just go through it, you

00:17:54.000 –> 00:17:56.000

still experience it. Right? There’s still frustration and

00:17:56.000 –> 00:17:58.000

anxiety and fear and frustration,

00:17:58.000 –> 00:18:00.000

but there’s less of it. Right? The cows

00:18:00.000 –> 00:18:01.000

have this prolonged,

00:18:02.000 –> 00:18:03.000

frustrating experience in adversity.

00:18:04.000 –> 00:18:05.000

The bison just simply get through it because

00:18:05.000 –> 00:18:07.000

they go into it, they get through it.

00:18:07.000 –> 00:18:08.000

And then on the other side of it,

00:18:08.000 –> 00:18:11.000

they’ve made progress. Mhmm. There’d have to be

00:18:11.000 –> 00:18:12.000

a lot of progress.

00:18:12.000 –> 00:18:14.000

Like, baby steps are still progress, but they

00:18:14.000 –> 00:18:16.000

they went through it. And they got better

00:18:16.000 –> 00:18:17.000

in the midst of it. And so that’s

00:18:17.000 –> 00:18:19.000

the general idea. It’s like adversity is gonna

00:18:19.000 –> 00:18:20.000

land on your doorstep at some point, and

00:18:20.000 –> 00:18:23.000

at multiple points in your life. Right? And

00:18:23.000 –> 00:18:24.000

and there could be there’s levels to it.

00:18:24.000 –> 00:18:26.000

It could be very small adversity. It could

00:18:26.000 –> 00:18:27.000

be a major live thing.

00:18:28.000 –> 00:18:30.000

The we have the choice in that moment.

00:18:30.000 –> 00:18:31.000

What do we do with it? We gonna

00:18:31.000 –> 00:18:33.000

let fear take over, run away from it,

00:18:33.000 –> 00:18:35.000

or we say, no. No. The only way

00:18:35.000 –> 00:18:36.000

through this, it’s not gonna be fun. It

00:18:36.000 –> 00:18:38.000

could be messy. It’s gonna be difficult. Like,

00:18:38.000 –> 00:18:39.000

it’s not it’s not saying there’s an easy

00:18:39.000 –> 00:18:42.000

path. But it’s the best path. Yeah. Yeah.

00:18:42.000 –> 00:18:43.000

It’s it’s to your point, I was it

00:18:43.000 –> 00:18:45.000

is gonna show up. Right? And I think

00:18:45.000 –> 00:18:47.000

so many times as we’re growing as leaders.

00:18:47.000 –> 00:18:48.000

We we want it just to be the

00:18:48.000 –> 00:18:51.000

straight line, but, obviously, success doesn’t work that

00:18:51.000 –> 00:18:52.000

way. Right? It’s a really squiggly market, and

00:18:52.000 –> 00:18:54.000

hopefully it ends up higher than where we

00:18:54.000 –> 00:18:56.000

started. But talk about, I I I can

00:18:56.000 –> 00:18:57.000

for me when I was, you know, I

00:18:57.000 –> 00:18:59.000

have a defining moments in my life, you

00:18:59.000 –> 00:19:01.000

know, like my second year as a financial

00:19:01.000 –> 00:19:03.000

advisor, the, you know, these different things that

00:19:03.000 –> 00:19:04.000

happen.

00:19:04.000 –> 00:19:07.000

What what moment for you was this light

00:19:07.000 –> 00:19:09.000

bulb moment? Maybe, like, in tough times, something

00:19:09.000 –> 00:19:10.000

you learned

00:19:11.000 –> 00:19:12.000

that, man, you’re just like, how did I

00:19:12.000 –> 00:19:14.000

not know that before? Any moments like that

00:19:14.000 –> 00:19:16.000

for you to stick out?

00:19:16.000 –> 00:19:18.000

Yeah. There was so year

00:19:20.000 –> 00:19:21.000

probably one, maybe two.

00:19:22.000 –> 00:19:24.000

When I was first starting Fieldhouse Media. So

00:19:24.000 –> 00:19:26.000

I had started another company. It failed miserably.

00:19:26.000 –> 00:19:27.000

It was in the health care world, which

00:19:27.000 –> 00:19:29.000

was my previous background.

00:19:30.000 –> 00:19:32.000

Like, zero dollars in a year failed like,

00:19:32.000 –> 00:19:34.000

so if there’s any any students listening or

00:19:34.000 –> 00:19:36.000

people starting business, like, the goal is to

00:19:36.000 –> 00:19:38.000

make more than zero dollars. Yes. You’ve got

00:19:38.000 –> 00:19:40.000

you’ve got bills to pay. Right? And so

00:19:40.000 –> 00:19:41.000

I I was at zero.

00:19:41.000 –> 00:19:43.000

Like, it was bad enough. Like, I had

00:19:43.000 –> 00:19:45.000

to sell a bicycle to pay a mortgage.

00:19:45.000 –> 00:19:46.000

Like, it was it was not good.

00:19:47.000 –> 00:19:49.000

And then I had this idea for field

00:19:49.000 –> 00:19:50.000

house media. And

00:19:51.000 –> 00:19:52.000

and I went to my wife and, like,

00:19:52.000 –> 00:19:54.000

you know, clearly I’m great at business.

00:19:55.000 –> 00:19:56.000

I think I should start another one. And

00:19:56.000 –> 00:19:58.000

for some reason, she was like, let’s go

00:19:58.000 –> 00:19:59.000

for it. And and we both felt like

00:19:59.000 –> 00:20:01.000

it was the right move But it was

00:20:01.000 –> 00:20:03.000

another year of

00:20:03.000 –> 00:20:04.000

no’s.

00:20:04.000 –> 00:20:06.000

Right? Every day was a no. Every day

00:20:06.000 –> 00:20:08.000

was a failure if if that’s the the

00:20:08.000 –> 00:20:09.000

definition of success if I’m trying to if

00:20:09.000 –> 00:20:10.000

if I’m trying to get a yes, I

00:20:10.000 –> 00:20:11.000

just got no’s.

00:20:12.000 –> 00:20:14.000

And it was I mean, I was depressed.

00:20:14.000 –> 00:20:16.000

I was anxious. I was, like, I’m not

00:20:16.000 –> 00:20:18.000

a huge person. Like, I was losing a

00:20:18.000 –> 00:20:19.000

ton of weight. I wasn’t sleeping.

00:20:20.000 –> 00:20:21.000

It was, like, we found out we were

00:20:21.000 –> 00:20:24.000

pregnant with our second son in that season.

00:20:24.000 –> 00:20:26.000

And my wife cried when we found out

00:20:26.000 –> 00:20:27.000

and not tears of joy. It was like,

00:20:27.000 –> 00:20:29.000

how are we gonna do this? Like,

00:20:29.000 –> 00:20:31.000

and but there was this we we had

00:20:31.000 –> 00:20:34.000

thankfully, you know, some poor mentors around us,

00:20:34.000 –> 00:20:36.000

a community around us, people around us,

00:20:37.000 –> 00:20:39.000

who believed in us, but also believed in

00:20:39.000 –> 00:20:41.000

what we were doing. And so, like, we

00:20:41.000 –> 00:20:43.000

we were having a weekly conversation with my

00:20:43.000 –> 00:20:45.000

wife, and I was like, hey, is this

00:20:45.000 –> 00:20:46.000

still the right path? Do we actually believe

00:20:47.000 –> 00:20:49.000

that this is the right path? Is this

00:20:49.000 –> 00:20:50.000

suffering worth it?

00:20:51.000 –> 00:20:52.000

And so we had to make a choice

00:20:52.000 –> 00:20:54.000

pretty much every week. Is this suffering worth

00:20:54.000 –> 00:20:55.000

it? And,

00:20:56.000 –> 00:20:58.000

what I wish I had known back in,

00:20:58.000 –> 00:21:00.000

and it and it certainly it it worked

00:21:00.000 –> 00:21:01.000

out. What I wish I had known,

00:21:03.000 –> 00:21:04.000

is that even in the midst of choosing

00:21:04.000 –> 00:21:07.000

to continue to enter into it, I wish

00:21:07.000 –> 00:21:09.000

I would have had a better attitude

00:21:09.000 –> 00:21:11.000

when I was, like, when I was actually

00:21:11.000 –> 00:21:13.000

in it. Because there was a lot of,

00:21:13.000 –> 00:21:14.000

like, we’d have the conversation, like, yeah, I

00:21:14.000 –> 00:21:16.000

feel like this is the right thing. Great.

00:21:16.000 –> 00:21:17.000

So I’d go back to work the next

00:21:17.000 –> 00:21:19.000

day and try to keep building. But my

00:21:19.000 –> 00:21:20.000

attitude the whole time was, like, this isn’t

00:21:21.000 –> 00:21:22.000

I was I was actually thinking this isn’t

00:21:22.000 –> 00:21:23.000

worth it. It’s not gonna work. I just

00:21:24.000 –> 00:21:26.000

I’ve I’ve come so negative,

00:21:27.000 –> 00:21:29.000

and so beaten down, I just didn’t I

00:21:29.000 –> 00:21:30.000

didn’t think it was gonna work even though

00:21:30.000 –> 00:21:32.000

I’ve I was trying to convince myself

00:21:32.000 –> 00:21:35.000

I wish I would’ve, had a better attitude,

00:21:35.000 –> 00:21:36.000

and I wish I would’ve,

00:21:36.000 –> 00:21:38.000

we had good community around us, but I

00:21:38.000 –> 00:21:40.000

wish I would’ve leaned more into that community.

00:21:41.000 –> 00:21:43.000

That’s part of the the new books, like,

00:21:43.000 –> 00:21:45.000

the power of your herd. Like, the people

00:21:45.000 –> 00:21:46.000

around you dictate your future.

00:21:47.000 –> 00:21:49.000

And I had the people around me,

00:21:49.000 –> 00:21:52.000

in my future, worked out okay, probably accidentally,

00:21:52.000 –> 00:21:54.000

which is just not how you want it

00:21:54.000 –> 00:21:55.000

to work out.

00:21:55.000 –> 00:21:57.000

It could have been better faster if I

00:21:57.000 –> 00:21:58.000

had actually leaned into the power of the

00:21:58.000 –> 00:22:01.000

people around me, because they were they wanted

00:22:01.000 –> 00:22:03.000

to pour in. They wanted to do whatever.

00:22:03.000 –> 00:22:05.000

And I was prideful in the midst of

00:22:05.000 –> 00:22:07.000

it saying, you know, I can I can

00:22:07.000 –> 00:22:08.000

do this on my own? And I and

00:22:08.000 –> 00:22:10.000

I didn’t because you never do it alone,

00:22:10.000 –> 00:22:12.000

but I wish I’d I wish I understood

00:22:12.000 –> 00:22:14.000

the power of the herd earlier on. Yep.

00:22:14.000 –> 00:22:17.000

It is so powerful, so powerful. And so

00:22:17.000 –> 00:22:19.000

thinking about that, I

00:22:20.000 –> 00:22:22.000

I read this quote recently that really hit

00:22:22.000 –> 00:22:24.000

me, and it was it said, you know,

00:22:24.000 –> 00:22:26.000

make decisions based on your knowledge,

00:22:26.000 –> 00:22:28.000

not on your emotion.

00:22:28.000 –> 00:22:30.000

Right? Yep. So it’s easy to say I

00:22:30.000 –> 00:22:32.000

wanna go to the gym and base it

00:22:32.000 –> 00:22:33.000

on knowledge, but there’s days you don’t wanna

00:22:33.000 –> 00:22:35.000

do it. Right? So what have you found

00:22:35.000 –> 00:22:37.000

yourself Gilliland, you know, these other leaders and

00:22:37.000 –> 00:22:40.000

these coaches and athletic directors and all the

00:22:40.000 –> 00:22:41.000

people you’re around,

00:22:41.000 –> 00:22:42.000

what do you find

00:22:42.000 –> 00:22:45.000

is is that thing, right, that gets them

00:22:45.000 –> 00:22:47.000

going to the, quote, unquote, gym, what it

00:22:47.000 –> 00:22:49.000

may be. What is that thing that helps

00:22:49.000 –> 00:22:52.000

them base their decision on knowledge?

00:22:53.000 –> 00:22:54.000

Yeah. I think for me,

00:22:55.000 –> 00:22:56.000

it’s honoring your commitments.

00:22:57.000 –> 00:22:59.000

Meaning if I committed to doing it yesterday,

00:23:00.000 –> 00:23:01.000

it doesn’t matter how I feel today.

00:23:02.000 –> 00:23:04.000

So I I’ve lately, I’ve been phrasing it

00:23:04.000 –> 00:23:05.000

kind of that way. It’s like, I wanna

00:23:05.000 –> 00:23:07.000

honor yesterday’s commit not today’s feelings.

00:23:08.000 –> 00:23:10.000

Because I it’s your point. I’m not gonna

00:23:10.000 –> 00:23:11.000

feel like it all the time, and nobody

00:23:11.000 –> 00:23:13.000

does. And I and I think that’s the

00:23:13.000 –> 00:23:15.000

biggest thing is is when I when I

00:23:15.000 –> 00:23:17.000

talk to young people today, whether that’s college

00:23:17.000 –> 00:23:19.000

students or or young professionals,

00:23:20.000 –> 00:23:21.000

a lot of it is how they feel.

00:23:22.000 –> 00:23:24.000

I’m like Yep. I’m not trying to be

00:23:24.000 –> 00:23:26.000

dismissive, but I just don’t really care. How

00:23:26.000 –> 00:23:28.000

you feel like we all have days. We

00:23:28.000 –> 00:23:29.000

don’t feel like it. This is part of

00:23:29.000 –> 00:23:31.000

life doesn’t mean you have a bad boss,

00:23:31.000 –> 00:23:32.000

doesn’t mean you have a bad team, doesn’t

00:23:32.000 –> 00:23:34.000

mean you’re in the wrong job. It just

00:23:34.000 –> 00:23:36.000

means that life is hard some days, and

00:23:36.000 –> 00:23:38.000

we don’t always feel like it. And and

00:23:38.000 –> 00:23:40.000

who you actually are, is determined by how

00:23:40.000 –> 00:23:42.000

you show up when you don’t feel like

00:23:42.000 –> 00:23:43.000

it. Because if if we all just showed

00:23:43.000 –> 00:23:44.000

up when we when we felt like it,

00:23:44.000 –> 00:23:46.000

we would make zero progress.

00:23:46.000 –> 00:23:48.000

Right. And but if I can, you know,

00:23:48.000 –> 00:23:51.000

I’ve I’ve been really consistent, and I’m not

00:23:51.000 –> 00:23:52.000

a disciplined person,

00:23:52.000 –> 00:23:54.000

but I’ve trained myself to be disciplined. Right?

00:23:54.000 –> 00:23:56.000

It’s not a personality trait. It’s it’s a

00:23:56.000 –> 00:23:58.000

Gilliland

00:23:58.000 –> 00:24:00.000

so I’ve I found that when I when

00:24:00.000 –> 00:24:00.000

I

00:24:01.000 –> 00:24:02.000

live my live my commitments,

00:24:04.000 –> 00:24:05.000

the the more I choose it the easier

00:24:05.000 –> 00:24:06.000

it gets.

00:24:07.000 –> 00:24:07.000

Meaning,

00:24:08.000 –> 00:24:09.000

so I’ve I’ve worked out,

00:24:10.000 –> 00:24:12.000

every day now for over three hundred and

00:24:12.000 –> 00:24:13.000

sixty five days.

00:24:14.000 –> 00:24:15.000

And and I just do it at my

00:24:15.000 –> 00:24:18.000

house. Like Yep. I’m I’m big on eliminating

00:24:18.000 –> 00:24:20.000

as many barriers as possible. It’s like, man,

00:24:20.000 –> 00:24:21.000

I don’t wanna wake up and get on

00:24:21.000 –> 00:24:22.000

gym clothes and drive to the gym and

00:24:22.000 –> 00:24:24.000

deal that and drive home. Okay. Can you

00:24:24.000 –> 00:24:26.000

do something in your house?

00:24:26.000 –> 00:24:27.000

You know, what can you do it? Like,

00:24:27.000 –> 00:24:29.000

go start simple, then you can then you

00:24:29.000 –> 00:24:30.000

can add to it if you want to.

00:24:31.000 –> 00:24:34.000

Yeah. But early on, it was not fun

00:24:34.000 –> 00:24:36.000

always. I didn’t always look forward to it.

00:24:36.000 –> 00:24:37.000

Some days, I wake up, and I’m sore

00:24:37.000 –> 00:24:40.000

from the previous day. Or I’ve traveled or

00:24:40.000 –> 00:24:42.000

there’s all sorts of excuses I can make.

00:24:42.000 –> 00:24:43.000

Well, I’ll just take the day off. And

00:24:43.000 –> 00:24:45.000

rest is great. Like, it’s okay to take

00:24:45.000 –> 00:24:45.000

days off.

00:24:46.000 –> 00:24:47.000

But

00:24:47.000 –> 00:24:48.000

I just had to say no. No. I

00:24:48.000 –> 00:24:50.000

yesterday, I said I was gonna do it

00:24:50.000 –> 00:24:51.000

today. So I’m gonna I’m gonna honor that

00:24:51.000 –> 00:24:52.000

commitment. And the more I choose it, the

00:24:52.000 –> 00:24:54.000

less I have to choose it. Right? The

00:24:54.000 –> 00:24:56.000

more I choose it, the more it starts

00:24:56.000 –> 00:24:58.000

to become automatic. And so now I don’t

00:24:58.000 –> 00:25:00.000

wake up and negotiate with myself. It’s like,

00:25:00.000 –> 00:25:02.000

alright. And I walk walk to the room

00:25:02.000 –> 00:25:03.000

where I get my workin’ in. It’s like,

00:25:03.000 –> 00:25:05.000

it’s just just what I do. And so

00:25:05.000 –> 00:25:06.000

I think

00:25:06.000 –> 00:25:08.000

for leaders, it’s it’s one, it’s choosing to

00:25:08.000 –> 00:25:09.000

live your commitments.

00:25:10.000 –> 00:25:12.000

But two, also having a reason for why

00:25:12.000 –> 00:25:14.000

you’re doing it. Like, I’m not I’m not

00:25:14.000 –> 00:25:15.000

working out to be a body builder.

00:25:16.000 –> 00:25:17.000

To climb mount everest, to run a like,

00:25:17.000 –> 00:25:19.000

I’m working out to be healthy as a

00:25:19.000 –> 00:25:21.000

leader, as an entrepreneur,

00:25:21.000 –> 00:25:23.000

as a dad, as a husband, Like, there’s

00:25:23.000 –> 00:25:25.000

a there’s a why that makes me want

00:25:25.000 –> 00:25:26.000

to get up every morning and do those

00:25:26.000 –> 00:25:28.000

things. And I don’t always remember that why.

00:25:29.000 –> 00:25:30.000

And and somebody said, and I do the

00:25:30.000 –> 00:25:32.000

same thing. And faith is a big deal

00:25:32.000 –> 00:25:33.000

for me. Youversion is an app that I

00:25:33.000 –> 00:25:34.000

use.

00:25:35.000 –> 00:25:37.000

I’ve been in it every day

00:25:38.000 –> 00:25:40.000

for one thousand three hundred and seventy four

00:25:40.000 –> 00:25:42.000

straight days. And so we’d like to start

00:25:42.000 –> 00:25:44.000

just going through the motions some days. Yep.

00:25:44.000 –> 00:25:45.000

Just a Bible app.

00:25:46.000 –> 00:25:47.000

Oh, yeah. Yeah. And they’ve got these little,

00:25:47.000 –> 00:25:48.000

you know, short short devotionals.

00:25:49.000 –> 00:25:51.000

But people are like, why don’t you just

00:25:51.000 –> 00:25:53.000

go through the motions some days? Yep. But

00:25:53.000 –> 00:25:54.000

I’d rather go through the motions the on

00:25:54.000 –> 00:25:56.000

doing the right things than do nothing. You

00:25:56.000 –> 00:25:57.000

know? So I’m okay with just going through

00:25:57.000 –> 00:25:59.000

the motions someday. That that’s okay.

00:26:00.000 –> 00:26:01.000

But I’ve just found the more

00:26:02.000 –> 00:26:04.000

I think the two things I’ll I’ll try

00:26:04.000 –> 00:26:06.000

to create is confidence and momentum.

00:26:07.000 –> 00:26:09.000

Meaning, if I do it today,

00:26:09.000 –> 00:26:11.000

that fear is gonna kick in tomorrow. You

00:26:11.000 –> 00:26:12.000

can’t do this today. You can’t work out

00:26:12.000 –> 00:26:14.000

today. You’re tired. You travel me. No. No.

00:26:14.000 –> 00:26:16.000

I did it yesterday. I actually know that

00:26:16.000 –> 00:26:17.000

I can do it. I have proof that

00:26:17.000 –> 00:26:18.000

I can do it. I have confidence because

00:26:18.000 –> 00:26:20.000

I did it yesterday. Which allows me to

00:26:20.000 –> 00:26:22.000

do it today. Once you get to stack

00:26:22.000 –> 00:26:23.000

two or three, four, five days in a

00:26:23.000 –> 00:26:25.000

row, I know you have confidence. Now you

00:26:25.000 –> 00:26:27.000

also have momentum. And those things can carry

00:26:27.000 –> 00:26:29.000

you through to some powerful places. Yep. So

00:26:29.000 –> 00:26:31.000

what kind of exercises are you doing these

00:26:31.000 –> 00:26:32.000

days?

00:26:32.000 –> 00:26:33.000

So I’ve shifted.

00:26:34.000 –> 00:26:36.000

So for most of the last year, it

00:26:36.000 –> 00:26:38.000

was some variation. Like, I’d just get up

00:26:38.000 –> 00:26:39.000

and I would do, like,

00:26:40.000 –> 00:26:42.000

push ups. I’d do curls. I’d do some

00:26:42.000 –> 00:26:45.000

tricep stuff. I’d do some some, crunches, some

00:26:45.000 –> 00:26:47.000

ab work. Just very basic.

00:26:47.000 –> 00:26:50.000

The last fifty days I think I’m actually

00:26:50.000 –> 00:26:52.000

fifty days in. Let me check my phone

00:26:52.000 –> 00:26:53.000

to make sure this I’m not lying to

00:26:53.000 –> 00:26:55.000

you. But I I

00:26:55.000 –> 00:26:57.000

signed up for an app called,

00:26:58.000 –> 00:26:59.000

ladder.

00:27:00.000 –> 00:27:01.000

Fifty

00:27:01.000 –> 00:27:04.000

one days. Sorry. Fifty fifty one days.

00:27:05.000 –> 00:27:05.000

And

00:27:06.000 –> 00:27:08.000

so you go in, and I I wanna

00:27:08.000 –> 00:27:10.000

say it’s twenty, maybe thirty bucks a month.

00:27:10.000 –> 00:27:11.000

I hate going to the gym. Like, I

00:27:11.000 –> 00:27:13.000

love working out. I hate going to the

00:27:13.000 –> 00:27:16.000

gym. It’s just not alright. I hate the

00:27:16.000 –> 00:27:17.000

process. I actually like being at the gym,

00:27:17.000 –> 00:27:19.000

but the whole process of it is just

00:27:19.000 –> 00:27:19.000

not convenient.

00:27:20.000 –> 00:27:23.000

For for my life. And so ladder, you

00:27:23.000 –> 00:27:24.000

go in and you say, what kind of

00:27:24.000 –> 00:27:26.000

workouts do you like to do, or what

00:27:26.000 –> 00:27:27.000

type of equipment do you like to use

00:27:28.000 –> 00:27:29.000

Where do you like to work out? How

00:27:29.000 –> 00:27:31.000

long do you like to work out? What

00:27:31.000 –> 00:27:31.000

are your goals?

00:27:32.000 –> 00:27:34.000

And it assigns you a coach or it’s

00:27:34.000 –> 00:27:36.000

a here here’s two or three coaches who

00:27:36.000 –> 00:27:37.000

could who could work for you. And you

00:27:37.000 –> 00:27:39.000

look at their program and you sign up

00:27:39.000 –> 00:27:41.000

and they drop in every Sunday night, they

00:27:41.000 –> 00:27:43.000

drop in seven workouts. So a workout for

00:27:43.000 –> 00:27:45.000

every day of the week. So I am

00:27:45.000 –> 00:27:47.000

really big right now on kettlebells.

00:27:48.000 –> 00:27:50.000

And so forty five usually it’s about forty

00:27:50.000 –> 00:27:52.000

to forty five minutes, each morning.

00:27:52.000 –> 00:27:54.000

And I just go in and they’ve got

00:27:54.000 –> 00:27:55.000

the plan right there. Like, I don’t have

00:27:55.000 –> 00:27:57.000

to leave my house. I’ve I bought, you

00:27:57.000 –> 00:27:58.000

know, have her mini kettle bells.

00:27:59.000 –> 00:28:00.000

My wife’s, like, we we got more. I’m

00:28:00.000 –> 00:28:02.000

like, sorry. I got stronger. I have to

00:28:02.000 –> 00:28:03.000

I have to get some more. How can

00:28:03.000 –> 00:28:04.000

I keep upgrading?

00:28:05.000 –> 00:28:07.000

It’s like, I have, like, every few weeks,

00:28:07.000 –> 00:28:09.000

like, a that another cap? Yeah. It is.

00:28:09.000 –> 00:28:10.000

It is.

00:28:10.000 –> 00:28:12.000

But it’s but I love it. It’s, like,

00:28:12.000 –> 00:28:12.000

it’s really challenging.

00:28:13.000 –> 00:28:14.000

It’s

00:28:15.000 –> 00:28:18.000

notice a difference in my energy and confidence.

00:28:18.000 –> 00:28:20.000

So I I love it. It’s a it’s

00:28:20.000 –> 00:28:22.000

a essentially a coaching platform that keeps you

00:28:22.000 –> 00:28:24.000

again, and I love tracking things.

00:28:24.000 –> 00:28:26.000

I’ve learned that keeps me accountable. So there’s

00:28:26.000 –> 00:28:28.000

a tracker, like, your workouts and all this

00:28:28.000 –> 00:28:29.000

stuff.

00:28:29.000 –> 00:28:31.000

But it’s great. Just that and I can

00:28:31.000 –> 00:28:33.000

do I can add a speaking engagement in

00:28:33.000 –> 00:28:34.000

Dallas a few weeks I load it up,

00:28:34.000 –> 00:28:36.000

and it’s three hour drive. So I just

00:28:36.000 –> 00:28:38.000

drove, took a kettlebell with me in the

00:28:38.000 –> 00:28:39.000

hotel room. You know, I can I can

00:28:39.000 –> 00:28:41.000

do it? And so that’s why I like

00:28:41.000 –> 00:28:43.000

to create systems and things that I can

00:28:43.000 –> 00:28:45.000

do at home or on the road. Yep.

00:28:45.000 –> 00:28:47.000

Love it. Yeah. It’s it’s nice to have

00:28:47.000 –> 00:28:49.000

the apps, and it because for me, I

00:28:49.000 –> 00:28:50.000

don’t know what to do when I get

00:28:50.000 –> 00:28:51.000

into the gym. You know, it’s like, okay.

00:28:51.000 –> 00:28:53.000

Let’s work on this thing. I’m like, well,

00:28:53.000 –> 00:28:55.000

I don’t know what all that actually does.

00:28:55.000 –> 00:28:57.000

So firm myself than just not doing it.

00:28:57.000 –> 00:28:59.000

But so I used the Peloton app, and

00:28:59.000 –> 00:29:01.000

then they’re, you know, rower and tread and

00:29:01.000 –> 00:29:03.000

all that stuff, the bike. And then, and

00:29:03.000 –> 00:29:05.000

then an app called Better Me I just

00:29:05.000 –> 00:29:07.000

found. It’s, same kind of thing. They ask

00:29:07.000 –> 00:29:08.000

you a lot of goals. I’ve seen that.

00:29:08.000 –> 00:29:10.000

Yeah. Yeah. It was one of those that

00:29:10.000 –> 00:29:12.000

shows up on my Instagram feed nonstop, and

00:29:12.000 –> 00:29:14.000

they don’t finally, I’ll tap out and buy

00:29:14.000 –> 00:29:15.000

it for That’s right. That’s right. Yeah. It

00:29:15.000 –> 00:29:17.000

was a hundred dollars. That’s exactly a letter.

00:29:17.000 –> 00:29:19.000

I said no. And the next thing you

00:29:19.000 –> 00:29:20.000

know, then like fifty dollars. And then it

00:29:20.000 –> 00:29:23.000

was twelve dollars for, you know, twelve weeks

00:29:23.000 –> 00:29:25.000

or whatever. I’m like, alright, whatever. Just a

00:29:25.000 –> 00:29:26.000

buy for twelve bucks just to not see

00:29:26.000 –> 00:29:29.000

the damn feature. One. Yeah. That’s right. Exactly

00:29:29.000 –> 00:29:30.000

right. That was exactly the same thing with

00:29:30.000 –> 00:29:32.000

ladder. Like, fine. Yeah.

00:29:32.000 –> 00:29:34.000

I’ll I’ll give in. I did that with

00:29:34.000 –> 00:29:35.000

ladder. I did it with athletic greens. It’s

00:29:35.000 –> 00:29:38.000

like trying to be healthier wasting food stuff

00:29:38.000 –> 00:29:38.000

and,

00:29:39.000 –> 00:29:40.000

with the diet part as well. And it’s

00:29:40.000 –> 00:29:42.000

just, yeah, I’m social media man. Get this

00:29:42.000 –> 00:29:43.000

every time.

00:29:43.000 –> 00:29:45.000

Well, athletic greens is showing up all the

00:29:45.000 –> 00:29:46.000

time too. Do you like it?

00:29:47.000 –> 00:29:49.000

So here’s my take on athletic greens.

00:29:50.000 –> 00:29:51.000

One, it’s good.

00:29:52.000 –> 00:29:54.000

I will just say, for the sake of

00:29:54.000 –> 00:29:56.000

people listening, it just destroyed my stomach

00:29:56.000 –> 00:29:58.000

Okay. I mean, like, I felt like I

00:29:58.000 –> 00:30:00.000

was under threat all the all day every

00:30:00.000 –> 00:30:02.000

day that anything could go wrong at at

00:30:02.000 –> 00:30:03.000

any given point. Yeah.

00:30:04.000 –> 00:30:06.000

And which part that’s of it, like, it’s

00:30:06.000 –> 00:30:07.000

a part of it as a probiotic. And

00:30:07.000 –> 00:30:09.000

so it’s it’s messing with you a little

00:30:09.000 –> 00:30:09.000

bit.

00:30:10.000 –> 00:30:13.000

I went to the head nutritionist at o

00:30:13.000 –> 00:30:15.000

u. Said, hey, I’m taking this. Do you

00:30:15.000 –> 00:30:17.000

is is it good? Do you recommend anything

00:30:17.000 –> 00:30:17.000

else?

00:30:18.000 –> 00:30:20.000

She directed me to something called Heart Greens

00:30:20.000 –> 00:30:22.000

by a company called Human, h u m

00:30:22.000 –> 00:30:23.000

a n n.

00:30:24.000 –> 00:30:26.000

And it’s, like, a third of the price

00:30:26.000 –> 00:30:28.000

about that at greens. Yeah. And it’s great.

00:30:28.000 –> 00:30:29.000

And I’ve had had no issues.

00:30:30.000 –> 00:30:32.000

Yeah, heart greens by human.

00:30:32.000 –> 00:30:34.000

Okay. I’ll write that one down. I gotta

00:30:34.000 –> 00:30:36.000

punch that. Yeah. I do green juice from

00:30:36.000 –> 00:30:38.000

our local grocery store every day. So we’ll

00:30:38.000 –> 00:30:40.000

get the kale and parsley and all that

00:30:40.000 –> 00:30:41.000

stuff. So it’s good for you.

00:30:42.000 –> 00:30:43.000

Yeah. So how do you stay a student

00:30:43.000 –> 00:30:45.000

of the game? And, obviously, you know, people

00:30:45.000 –> 00:30:46.000

are coming to you for advice. So you

00:30:46.000 –> 00:30:48.000

gotta keep learning and keep training and keep

00:30:48.000 –> 00:30:50.000

your mind So how do you personally stay

00:30:50.000 –> 00:30:52.000

a student in the game?

00:30:53.000 –> 00:30:54.000

Try to read and observe as much as

00:30:54.000 –> 00:30:57.000

possible. Like, I’m I’ve had to train myself

00:30:57.000 –> 00:30:59.000

because I used to wonder probably 10:15 years

00:30:59.000 –> 00:31:01.000

ago, and I’d follow other speakers

00:31:01.000 –> 00:31:04.000

or experts or authorities on whatever topic. Like,

00:31:04.000 –> 00:31:05.000

where did they come up with these stories?

00:31:05.000 –> 00:31:07.000

Like, what in the and I just realized

00:31:07.000 –> 00:31:09.000

they’re just paying attention to life. They just

00:31:09.000 –> 00:31:11.000

choose to be observant about whether it’s their

00:31:11.000 –> 00:31:14.000

kid’s basketball game or a road trip,

00:31:14.000 –> 00:31:16.000

or something with their friends or at the

00:31:16.000 –> 00:31:19.000

grocery store. They’re observing human behavior.

00:31:20.000 –> 00:31:21.000

And so I’ve it’s it it was a

00:31:21.000 –> 00:31:23.000

a challenge to me because my my mind

00:31:23.000 –> 00:31:25.000

is usually always in the clouds. Like, it’s

00:31:25.000 –> 00:31:27.000

it’s I’m always thinking of different things, and

00:31:27.000 –> 00:31:29.000

I’m not I’m usually I struggle to be

00:31:29.000 –> 00:31:30.000

wherever I am, right, to be present.

00:31:31.000 –> 00:31:33.000

And so I’ve tried to train myself to

00:31:33.000 –> 00:31:33.000

just be aware

00:31:34.000 –> 00:31:36.000

of what’s happening in the day to day

00:31:36.000 –> 00:31:38.000

moments, which is doing that daily newsletter has

00:31:38.000 –> 00:31:39.000

been a really good.

00:31:40.000 –> 00:31:42.000

It’s forced me to be aware because I’ve

00:31:42.000 –> 00:31:44.000

gotta have a story every day from from

00:31:44.000 –> 00:31:46.000

somewhere, you know. Yep. So I think just

00:31:46.000 –> 00:31:48.000

observing people, trying to be present,

00:31:48.000 –> 00:31:50.000

trying to ask a lot of questions of

00:31:50.000 –> 00:31:52.000

people. And I think I try to follow,

00:31:53.000 –> 00:31:55.000

say the right people, but interesting people on

00:31:55.000 –> 00:31:57.000

social media. So, yeah, I’ve got my sports

00:31:57.000 –> 00:31:59.000

feed, but I also wanna follow leaders from

00:31:59.000 –> 00:32:01.000

a variety of areas

00:32:02.000 –> 00:32:03.000

because that that’s the beauty of me for

00:32:03.000 –> 00:32:04.000

social media. It’s like, I can learn from

00:32:04.000 –> 00:32:06.000

some of the best leaders on the planet

00:32:06.000 –> 00:32:08.000

because they’re sharing their stories, their wisdom for

00:32:08.000 –> 00:32:10.000

free. You know, you’re getting a master class

00:32:10.000 –> 00:32:12.000

from these people. I think trying to trying

00:32:12.000 –> 00:32:13.000

to follow business leaders,

00:32:14.000 –> 00:32:16.000

certain industry leaders on social media, not honestly,

00:32:16.000 –> 00:32:18.000

read the right books, but but read books

00:32:18.000 –> 00:32:19.000

that are,

00:32:20.000 –> 00:32:22.000

that that provide unique perspective.

00:32:22.000 –> 00:32:25.000

Yeah. Who any go to leaders you’d recommend

00:32:25.000 –> 00:32:27.000

following and put out some good content?

00:32:27.000 –> 00:32:29.000

Oh gosh. I knew you were gonna ask

00:32:29.000 –> 00:32:29.000

that.

00:32:30.000 –> 00:32:33.000

I think besides you, of course. Yeah.

00:32:33.000 –> 00:32:36.000

I think Mark Cuban is a fascinating follow.

00:32:37.000 –> 00:32:38.000

On We think we think his deal. What’s

00:32:38.000 –> 00:32:40.000

his next play? So if I’m I’m getting

00:32:40.000 –> 00:32:42.000

off Shark Tank. I’m selling part of the

00:32:42.000 –> 00:32:44.000

was it fifty seven percent of the Mavericks.

00:32:45.000 –> 00:32:47.000

What’s the next play?

00:32:47.000 –> 00:32:49.000

And I I saw where he told someone

00:32:49.000 –> 00:32:52.000

he’s not gonna run for political office,

00:32:52.000 –> 00:32:54.000

but I bet he runs for political office.

00:32:54.000 –> 00:32:56.000

Yeah. That’s I’ve said that too. Or or

00:32:56.000 –> 00:32:59.000

something something in that realm because it just

00:32:59.000 –> 00:33:00.000

doesn’t make sense. I mean,

00:33:01.000 –> 00:33:03.000

you know, guys like that could always start

00:33:03.000 –> 00:33:05.000

any kind of, you know, they could start

00:33:05.000 –> 00:33:06.000

a business tomorrow, do whatever they want. But

00:33:06.000 –> 00:33:08.000

he’s because he’s got that,

00:33:08.000 –> 00:33:10.000

some kind of health care prescription thing that

00:33:10.000 –> 00:33:12.000

he’s doing as well, trying to create low

00:33:12.000 –> 00:33:14.000

cost prescriptions for people.

00:33:15.000 –> 00:33:16.000

But I would I would guess that that

00:33:16.000 –> 00:33:19.000

he’s he’s gonna run for something or get

00:33:19.000 –> 00:33:22.000

involved and in politics in in some way,

00:33:22.000 –> 00:33:23.000

shape, or form. Yeah.

00:33:24.000 –> 00:33:27.000

Yeah. He’s always an interesting one. I love

00:33:27.000 –> 00:33:28.000

following tech entrepreneurs.

00:33:30.000 –> 00:33:31.000

Like, I named David Sachs that I that

00:33:31.000 –> 00:33:32.000

I enjoy following.

00:33:35.000 –> 00:33:37.000

I love I love following journalists. Like, the

00:33:37.000 –> 00:33:40.000

media is just a fascinating industry. For me.

00:33:41.000 –> 00:33:43.000

I shouldn’t say journalists. I should say media

00:33:43.000 –> 00:33:45.000

personalities, like people who comment on the media.

00:33:46.000 –> 00:33:47.000

Maybe they’re a part of it, but they’re

00:33:47.000 –> 00:33:49.000

not just writing journalism pieces, but they like

00:33:49.000 –> 00:33:50.000

to comment on the state of of the

00:33:50.000 –> 00:33:51.000

media.

00:33:51.000 –> 00:33:53.000

I think the world’s just it’s an interesting

00:33:53.000 –> 00:33:54.000

place, you know.

00:33:55.000 –> 00:33:57.000

There’s there’s a lot. And I and I

00:33:57.000 –> 00:33:59.000

try to follow people I don’t agree with.

00:34:00.000 –> 00:34:02.000

And just to get to always have a

00:34:02.000 –> 00:34:04.000

different perspective. I think part of social media

00:34:04.000 –> 00:34:04.000

is they can easily be an echo chamber

00:34:04.000 –> 00:34:04.000

of, people reinforcing what you already

00:34:07.000 –> 00:34:09.000

think. As long as people are respectful,

00:34:10.000 –> 00:34:12.000

I always wanna follow-up with people who have

00:34:12.000 –> 00:34:14.000

a different opinion, different perspective, come at it

00:34:14.000 –> 00:34:15.000

from a different side.

00:34:16.000 –> 00:34:17.000

Now if they’re gonna, you know, scream and

00:34:17.000 –> 00:34:18.000

yell call people names, like, well, that’s not

00:34:18.000 –> 00:34:20.000

necessary. But I like to I like to

00:34:20.000 –> 00:34:22.000

follow people that I don’t necessarily agree with

00:34:22.000 –> 00:34:24.000

as well. You know, get a little get

00:34:24.000 –> 00:34:25.000

a counter intuitive,

00:34:26.000 –> 00:34:27.000

stuff here that we’re we’re one of the

00:34:27.000 –> 00:34:29.000

questions I was gonna ask you is what

00:34:29.000 –> 00:34:32.000

is something that’s counter intuitive to anybody else

00:34:32.000 –> 00:34:34.000

would believe, but you know that it works,

00:34:34.000 –> 00:34:36.000

and you and you believe it to your

00:34:36.000 –> 00:34:37.000

core. Is there anything that comes to mind

00:34:37.000 –> 00:34:38.000

for you?

00:34:41.000 –> 00:34:43.000

That was a great question. How do I

00:34:43.000 –> 00:34:45.000

actually wanna answer that?

00:34:49.000 –> 00:34:51.000

This shouldn’t be an answer to that question,

00:34:51.000 –> 00:34:53.000

but I think in twenty twenty three, twenty

00:34:53.000 –> 00:34:54.000

twenty four, it is, is

00:34:55.000 –> 00:34:56.000

that

00:34:57.000 –> 00:34:58.000

hard work will get you most of what

00:34:58.000 –> 00:34:59.000

you want.

00:34:59.000 –> 00:35:00.000

I’ve

00:35:00.000 –> 00:35:02.000

I think in today’s world, we just think

00:35:02.000 –> 00:35:03.000

things are gonna be handed to us and

00:35:03.000 –> 00:35:05.000

that we can do average work.

00:35:05.000 –> 00:35:08.000

And I give average effort and expect great

00:35:08.000 –> 00:35:11.000

things. And I think if if you want

00:35:11.000 –> 00:35:13.000

more, you actually have to do more. And

00:35:13.000 –> 00:35:13.000

that’s not

00:35:14.000 –> 00:35:16.000

you know, I’m not saying to buy into

00:35:16.000 –> 00:35:17.000

the hustle culture. I’m not saying you gotta

00:35:17.000 –> 00:35:19.000

do seventy, eighty hours a week. That’s, you

00:35:19.000 –> 00:35:21.000

know, that’s a great great way to to

00:35:21.000 –> 00:35:23.000

live a life of burnout. But, you know,

00:35:23.000 –> 00:35:24.000

if you if you think of, you know,

00:35:24.000 –> 00:35:26.000

my fourteen year old

00:35:26.000 –> 00:35:27.000

freshman basketball team,

00:35:28.000 –> 00:35:30.000

like, hey, if if you wanna get better,

00:35:30.000 –> 00:35:32.000

you have to practice when other people don’t.

00:35:33.000 –> 00:35:35.000

You practice every day when the team practices.

00:35:35.000 –> 00:35:37.000

That means you’re getting better at the same

00:35:37.000 –> 00:35:39.000

rate, generally speaking, the same rate of improvement

00:35:39.000 –> 00:35:41.000

as everybody else on the team. Well, if

00:35:41.000 –> 00:35:43.000

this guy is better than you and you’re

00:35:43.000 –> 00:35:45.000

practicing the same amount, he’s always gonna be

00:35:45.000 –> 00:35:46.000

better than you. But what if you came

00:35:46.000 –> 00:35:49.000

home and got in fifteen minutes? Fifteen minutes

00:35:49.000 –> 00:35:49.000

a day.

00:35:50.000 –> 00:35:52.000

Yep. That’s ninety one hours a year. How

00:35:53.000 –> 00:35:54.000

what what kind of difference would that make

00:35:54.000 –> 00:35:56.000

in your skill set? And so the same

00:35:56.000 –> 00:35:57.000

thing for a leader, same thing for an

00:35:57.000 –> 00:35:59.000

entrepreneur, same thing for whatever it may be,

00:35:59.000 –> 00:36:01.000

like, you actually have to do more. I

00:36:01.000 –> 00:36:01.000

think we’ve

00:36:02.000 –> 00:36:05.000

be because that kind of mindset was abused

00:36:05.000 –> 00:36:07.000

for for most of time, like, to to

00:36:07.000 –> 00:36:08.000

to burn people out and force people to

00:36:08.000 –> 00:36:10.000

work forty, fifty, sixty, eighty hour weeks, whatever.

00:36:11.000 –> 00:36:13.000

People push back the pendulum went all the

00:36:13.000 –> 00:36:15.000

way over here. They’re like, no. No. You

00:36:15.000 –> 00:36:16.000

just work thirty hours a week. It’ll be

00:36:16.000 –> 00:36:18.000

okay. Just hope for Like, no, I hope

00:36:18.000 –> 00:36:19.000

it’s a it’s a great fuel, but a

00:36:19.000 –> 00:36:21.000

terrible strategy. You actually have to work your

00:36:21.000 –> 00:36:23.000

tail off. If you if you wanna get

00:36:23.000 –> 00:36:25.000

things, you’ve gotta be willing to sacrifice

00:36:26.000 –> 00:36:28.000

And I think at some times, some seasons,

00:36:28.000 –> 00:36:30.000

that means you’re actually out of balance.

00:36:31.000 –> 00:36:33.000

You don’t want a life that’s out So

00:36:33.000 –> 00:36:34.000

I think for a season, if you wanna

00:36:34.000 –> 00:36:36.000

get to certain areas, you’ve gotta say, you’ve

00:36:36.000 –> 00:36:38.000

gotta shut out not everything, but almost everything,

00:36:38.000 –> 00:36:40.000

say, I’m going all in after this thing.

00:36:40.000 –> 00:36:41.000

And people are gonna say, you’re crazy. And

00:36:41.000 –> 00:36:43.000

then a year later, say, well, Maybe I

00:36:43.000 –> 00:36:45.000

was, but look what I accomplished because of

00:36:45.000 –> 00:36:45.000

that.

00:36:46.000 –> 00:36:47.000

Yeah. I agree, man. It does it goes

00:36:47.000 –> 00:36:49.000

in waves, doesn’t it? It just it’s sometimes

00:36:49.000 –> 00:36:51.000

you’re gonna be working family life more, sometimes

00:36:51.000 –> 00:36:54.000

you’re working at working. So but it’s gotta

00:36:54.000 –> 00:36:56.000

be somewhat balanced if if there is such

00:36:56.000 –> 00:36:56.000

a thing.

00:36:57.000 –> 00:36:59.000

If if I were to ask your team

00:36:59.000 –> 00:36:59.000

right now,

00:37:00.000 –> 00:37:02.000

you know, people that work for you. What

00:37:02.000 –> 00:37:03.000

what would they say

00:37:04.000 –> 00:37:06.000

you do well that helps build culture for

00:37:06.000 –> 00:37:07.000

your company?

00:37:08.000 –> 00:37:09.000

I think energy.

00:37:10.000 –> 00:37:13.000

I I think by nature, I’ve just always

00:37:13.000 –> 00:37:13.000

been,

00:37:15.000 –> 00:37:16.000

I don’t know, but by nature. Like, I’ve

00:37:16.000 –> 00:37:18.000

just always been a positive energy person. I’m

00:37:18.000 –> 00:37:20.000

an optimist. I tend to believe things are

00:37:20.000 –> 00:37:21.000

gonna work out.

00:37:22.000 –> 00:37:23.000

I’m not super serious.

00:37:24.000 –> 00:37:25.000

It’s interesting because I’ve I’ve

00:37:26.000 –> 00:37:28.000

just kinda go a different direction. But,

00:37:28.000 –> 00:37:29.000

you know, when I when I was in

00:37:29.000 –> 00:37:31.000

the corporate world, I was a goofy guy.

00:37:31.000 –> 00:37:33.000

We’d close a deal, and I’d run-in, like,

00:37:33.000 –> 00:37:35.000

fist pumping and yelling and just being goofy.

00:37:35.000 –> 00:37:37.000

Like, I just never took things super super

00:37:37.000 –> 00:37:38.000

serious,

00:37:38.000 –> 00:37:40.000

and we were unbelievably successful. Like, I was

00:37:40.000 –> 00:37:42.000

number two in the company in sales, like,

00:37:42.000 –> 00:37:44.000

and I wasn’t your typical,

00:37:44.000 –> 00:37:47.000

you know, buttoned up, super serious business minded

00:37:47.000 –> 00:37:49.000

salesperson. I just had fun and loved people.

00:37:50.000 –> 00:37:52.000

When I started in business, I don’t know

00:37:52.000 –> 00:37:54.000

if anybody said it to me or if

00:37:54.000 –> 00:37:56.000

I assumed they said it to me or

00:37:56.000 –> 00:37:57.000

if I just took on this belief,

00:37:58.000 –> 00:38:00.000

because people always say, man, you know, Kevin,

00:38:00.000 –> 00:38:02.000

he’s just not super serious, and he’s not

00:38:02.000 –> 00:38:03.000

that organized, and he’s not that into the

00:38:03.000 –> 00:38:04.000

details.

00:38:04.000 –> 00:38:07.000

And I I wore that as people don’t

00:38:07.000 –> 00:38:08.000

think I can be successful. Don’t think I

00:38:08.000 –> 00:38:09.000

can do this on my own. They don’t

00:38:09.000 –> 00:38:11.000

think I can build a business. And so

00:38:11.000 –> 00:38:14.000

I shut down kind of the goofy part

00:38:14.000 –> 00:38:15.000

of me for a long time.

00:38:16.000 –> 00:38:18.000

And that it’s called the quote unquote, unserious

00:38:18.000 –> 00:38:19.000

part of me to the point that people

00:38:20.000 –> 00:38:21.000

we do a lot with personality in our

00:38:21.000 –> 00:38:23.000

businesses. People are like, oh, I don’t actually

00:38:23.000 –> 00:38:24.000

think you are this personality. I’m like, no.

00:38:24.000 –> 00:38:25.000

No. No. I just want. I’ve been under

00:38:25.000 –> 00:38:27.000

stress for a decade trying to build. And

00:38:27.000 –> 00:38:30.000

then, two, I’ve just recently realized I believed

00:38:30.000 –> 00:38:31.000

to lie or whatever,

00:38:31.000 –> 00:38:33.000

a limiting belief that I had to be

00:38:33.000 –> 00:38:35.000

this way to be successful.

00:38:35.000 –> 00:38:36.000

And so I’ve just kinda been coming out

00:38:36.000 –> 00:38:39.000

of that shell again the last year or

00:38:39.000 –> 00:38:39.000

two.

00:38:40.000 –> 00:38:41.000

I’m like, no. No. No. Like, I love

00:38:41.000 –> 00:38:43.000

to have fun. Like, you can have fun.

00:38:43.000 –> 00:38:44.000

You don’t have to be

00:38:45.000 –> 00:38:47.000

serious and and all these things to be

00:38:47.000 –> 00:38:49.000

successful. Like, you can you can have big

00:38:49.000 –> 00:38:51.000

dreams, and you can be goofy, and you

00:38:51.000 –> 00:38:52.000

can make people laugh, and

00:38:53.000 –> 00:38:55.000

You can inject comedy in certain situations, and

00:38:55.000 –> 00:38:56.000

maybe it’s not you don’t always need to

00:38:56.000 –> 00:38:58.000

inject. Like, there’s a time to be serious,

00:38:58.000 –> 00:38:58.000

but,

00:38:59.000 –> 00:39:01.000

I think people just say, like, generally, I

00:39:01.000 –> 00:39:02.000

bring I bring fun.

00:39:02.000 –> 00:39:04.000

Yeah. So that was one of my biggest

00:39:04.000 –> 00:39:06.000

learnings when I looked back at my career,

00:39:06.000 –> 00:39:08.000

you know, twenty two years in the wealth

00:39:08.000 –> 00:39:10.000

management space. And so

00:39:11.000 –> 00:39:13.000

when I was this young the young Brett

00:39:13.000 –> 00:39:14.000

would go take some of the older guys

00:39:14.000 –> 00:39:16.000

with him to meetings to try to learn.

00:39:16.000 –> 00:39:17.000

Right? And then I would just I thought

00:39:17.000 –> 00:39:19.000

I had to live in this just like

00:39:19.000 –> 00:39:21.000

what you were just saying. And and as

00:39:21.000 –> 00:39:23.000

soon as I found out or I guess

00:39:23.000 –> 00:39:24.000

I shouldn’t say found out. As soon as

00:39:24.000 –> 00:39:26.000

I believed that I could be Brett and

00:39:26.000 –> 00:39:28.000

to your point, have fun and and laugh

00:39:28.000 –> 00:39:29.000

a lot at work. It hadn’t been that’d

00:39:29.000 –> 00:39:30.000

be so damn serious.

00:39:31.000 –> 00:39:32.000

It’s an amazing. That’s when I started to

00:39:32.000 –> 00:39:34.000

find myself becoming more and more successful.

00:39:35.000 –> 00:39:37.000

Yeah. You well, you you find yourself being

00:39:37.000 –> 00:39:39.000

more successful Gilliland then you actually have fun

00:39:39.000 –> 00:39:41.000

being successful. Right?

00:39:41.000 –> 00:39:42.000

Wait a hell of a lot more. Like,

00:39:42.000 –> 00:39:43.000

because you can have six you can have

00:39:43.000 –> 00:39:45.000

success the other way or or a limited

00:39:45.000 –> 00:39:47.000

version of success, but you’re miserable all the

00:39:47.000 –> 00:39:48.000

time because you’re always feel like you’re trying

00:39:48.000 –> 00:39:49.000

to be someone you’re not. I was like,

00:39:49.000 –> 00:39:50.000

wait a minute. No. I can be me.

00:39:50.000 –> 00:39:52.000

And succeed. I don’t need to beat the

00:39:52.000 –> 00:39:53.000

and I, you know, again, we talk a

00:39:53.000 –> 00:39:55.000

lot about personality. Like, we’ve got kind of

00:39:55.000 –> 00:39:57.000

a right hand and left hand. I’m typically

00:39:57.000 –> 00:39:59.000

this part, you know, goofy, loud, fun, whatever.

00:40:00.000 –> 00:40:01.000

But there’s a part of me that can

00:40:01.000 –> 00:40:03.000

be serious that can be locked in that

00:40:03.000 –> 00:40:05.000

can be quote unquote professional, whatever that means.

00:40:05.000 –> 00:40:07.000

But for me to live there means I

00:40:07.000 –> 00:40:10.000

lose who I act actually am. And so

00:40:10.000 –> 00:40:12.000

trying to find that balance of, like, okay.

00:40:12.000 –> 00:40:13.000

When can I be me and when do

00:40:13.000 –> 00:40:15.000

I not need to be me? And how

00:40:15.000 –> 00:40:16.000

do I make that operate so that that

00:40:16.000 –> 00:40:20.000

everyone around me actually wins. Yep. Yep. So

00:40:20.000 –> 00:40:21.000

you can see this sticker right here, this

00:40:21.000 –> 00:40:23.000

f greater than p. I do. Yeah. Yeah.

00:40:24.000 –> 00:40:26.000

Our our mission is helping people achieve a

00:40:26.000 –> 00:40:28.000

future great in your past. And so it

00:40:28.000 –> 00:40:30.000

doesn’t mean that, you know, you had a

00:40:30.000 –> 00:40:31.000

bad past.

00:40:31.000 –> 00:40:33.000

But when you hear that, achieving a future

00:40:33.000 –> 00:40:35.000

greater than your past, what comes to mind

00:40:35.000 –> 00:40:36.000

for you?

00:40:38.000 –> 00:40:39.000

Oh, man. Well, I love it because I

00:40:39.000 –> 00:40:41.000

was actually wondering, like, I haven’t seen that

00:40:41.000 –> 00:40:43.000

on any of email, like, the soft company.

00:40:43.000 –> 00:40:45.000

I’m like, okay.

00:40:45.000 –> 00:40:47.000

Some so I am glad you brought that

00:40:47.000 –> 00:40:48.000

up because that’s good because that’s actually bothered

00:40:48.000 –> 00:40:49.000

me for a long time.

00:40:50.000 –> 00:40:52.000

No. That’s that’s good. Future greater than your

00:40:52.000 –> 00:40:53.000

past.

00:40:53.000 –> 00:40:56.000

I think for me that speaks hope to

00:40:56.000 –> 00:40:57.000

Gilliland

00:40:57.000 –> 00:40:59.000

I said earlier, right, hope is is is

00:40:59.000 –> 00:41:01.000

not a strategy, but it is great fuel.

00:41:02.000 –> 00:41:04.000

And I think if people are fueled by

00:41:04.000 –> 00:41:06.000

hope that it like you said, Does today

00:41:06.000 –> 00:41:08.000

could be good, but tomorrow could be even

00:41:08.000 –> 00:41:10.000

better. Mhmm. Doesn’t mean you have to have

00:41:10.000 –> 00:41:11.000

a terrible pass that you’re going through some

00:41:11.000 –> 00:41:14.000

stuff today, like, maybe you are. It certainly

00:41:14.000 –> 00:41:15.000

helps in those seasons. Right? If if things

00:41:15.000 –> 00:41:17.000

are difficult, like, hey, things can be better

00:41:17.000 –> 00:41:19.000

tomorrow. Whatever today is, things can be better

00:41:19.000 –> 00:41:19.000

tomorrow.

00:41:20.000 –> 00:41:22.000

But I think whatever season are in good

00:41:22.000 –> 00:41:23.000

season, tough season,

00:41:24.000 –> 00:41:27.000

seasons of, of abundance seasons where things are

00:41:27.000 –> 00:41:29.000

a little bit scarce. It’s like, hey, whatever

00:41:29.000 –> 00:41:30.000

season

00:41:30.000 –> 00:41:32.000

your future can is actually unlimited if you

00:41:32.000 –> 00:41:35.000

wanna create it. And and not in, you

00:41:35.000 –> 00:41:36.000

know, necessarily materialistic

00:41:36.000 –> 00:41:38.000

type sense, but, like, you can have a

00:41:38.000 –> 00:41:40.000

better tomorrow if you actually want to. And

00:41:40.000 –> 00:41:41.000

I think most people,

00:41:42.000 –> 00:41:44.000

I think most people have lost that. I

00:41:44.000 –> 00:41:47.000

don’t think people believe generally speaking anymore.

00:41:47.000 –> 00:41:49.000

They don’t believe that tomorrow can be better

00:41:49.000 –> 00:41:51.000

than today. I think people are stuck, and

00:41:51.000 –> 00:41:53.000

they feel like they’re always going to be

00:41:53.000 –> 00:41:55.000

stuck. Yeah. And they just get on this

00:41:55.000 –> 00:41:57.000

hamster wheel frustration and say, I don’t know.

00:41:57.000 –> 00:42:00.000

When you actually have so we have this

00:42:00.000 –> 00:42:01.000

to was this tool we use. We didn’t

00:42:01.000 –> 00:42:03.000

create it, but it’s called the the the

00:42:03.000 –> 00:42:03.000

change equation.

00:42:04.000 –> 00:42:05.000

And part of it is saying,

00:42:06.000 –> 00:42:08.000

you know, where what where’s your dissatisfaction

00:42:09.000 –> 00:42:11.000

in life? What are you dissatisfied with? Could

00:42:11.000 –> 00:42:12.000

be your finances, could be your family, could

00:42:12.000 –> 00:42:14.000

be your career, could be your health,

00:42:15.000 –> 00:42:16.000

could be relationships,

00:42:16.000 –> 00:42:18.000

could be a number of things. And and

00:42:18.000 –> 00:42:20.000

how dissatisfied are you, like, one to ten

00:42:20.000 –> 00:42:21.000

it’s like a one or a two, it’s

00:42:21.000 –> 00:42:24.000

like, okay. You’re not dissatisfied. You’re annoyed. You

00:42:24.000 –> 00:42:25.000

know, just get it stop complaining and move

00:42:25.000 –> 00:42:27.000

on. It’s an eight or a nine. It’s

00:42:27.000 –> 00:42:29.000

like, okay. We gotta do some surgery. Like,

00:42:29.000 –> 00:42:31.000

there’s some there’s some actual pain. So if

00:42:31.000 –> 00:42:34.000

you’re dissatisfaction, let’s say let’s say finances or

00:42:34.000 –> 00:42:35.000

your health, you’re an eight,

00:42:36.000 –> 00:42:38.000

What’s your vision? What’s your specific vision for

00:42:38.000 –> 00:42:38.000

that area? For for finances, your health, relationship,

00:42:38.000 –> 00:42:38.000

career? Most people, when when your vision is

00:42:38.000 –> 00:42:39.000

lower than

00:42:45.000 –> 00:42:46.000

your satisfaction,

00:42:47.000 –> 00:42:49.000

you get frustration, you get bitterness, you get

00:42:49.000 –> 00:42:51.000

discontent, you get anxiety, and that’s where most

00:42:51.000 –> 00:42:53.000

people are. You look around. Most people are

00:42:53.000 –> 00:42:54.000

are dissatisfied

00:42:54.000 –> 00:42:56.000

but they don’t have a vision of what

00:42:56.000 –> 00:42:58.000

could be. And so they’re stuck. Well, when

00:42:58.000 –> 00:43:00.000

your vision is higher than your dissatisfaction, well,

00:43:00.000 –> 00:43:02.000

then you have ambition, you have motivation,

00:43:03.000 –> 00:43:04.000

it’s saying like, hey, I’m at base camp

00:43:04.000 –> 00:43:06.000

at Mount Everest. I’m trying to get to

00:43:06.000 –> 00:43:07.000

the top. I’m not there yet,

00:43:08.000 –> 00:43:09.000

but I at least know where I’m going.

00:43:09.000 –> 00:43:11.000

And so you wake up every day with

00:43:11.000 –> 00:43:13.000

a direction that you wanna Gilliland

00:43:13.000 –> 00:43:15.000

so that that’s what I hear, what I

00:43:15.000 –> 00:43:16.000

see, when I see see future over your

00:43:16.000 –> 00:43:17.000

past, like,

00:43:17.000 –> 00:43:19.000

yeah, you’ve gotta have a Gilliland and a

00:43:19.000 –> 00:43:21.000

vision and a hope. And when you have

00:43:21.000 –> 00:43:23.000

that, anything’s possible. Yep. And I love that

00:43:23.000 –> 00:43:25.000

because it makes me think when we started

00:43:25.000 –> 00:43:28.000

our firm visionary wealth advisors that that so

00:43:28.000 –> 00:43:31.000

it’ll be ten years, in March. And

00:43:32.000 –> 00:43:35.000

that previous spot, as I was becoming more

00:43:35.000 –> 00:43:36.000

successful,

00:43:36.000 –> 00:43:38.000

right? Mhmm. My job satisfaction

00:43:38.000 –> 00:43:41.000

was going down. And Yeah. And then but

00:43:41.000 –> 00:43:43.000

we made this change to your point.

00:43:43.000 –> 00:43:46.000

Is it the Gilliland division was greater, right,

00:43:46.000 –> 00:43:47.000

than where we And so,

00:43:48.000 –> 00:43:50.000

it did. It fueled fire. It fueled energy.

00:43:50.000 –> 00:43:53.000

It fueled passion. But also, for me, personally,

00:43:53.000 –> 00:43:55.000

it it is basically

00:43:55.000 –> 00:43:58.000

you know, minimized to almost hardly anything, my

00:43:58.000 –> 00:44:00.000

anxiety, and my stress, and and Right. And

00:44:00.000 –> 00:44:02.000

so that happiness. And so it doesn’t ever

00:44:02.000 –> 00:44:04.000

mean it’s the right time because it wasn’t

00:44:04.000 –> 00:44:06.000

time. We were my wife was pregnant with

00:44:06.000 –> 00:44:09.000

our fourth child, built a new home. And

00:44:09.000 –> 00:44:10.000

so people have to

00:44:10.000 –> 00:44:13.000

think about those things, but take risks sometimes.

00:44:13.000 –> 00:44:14.000

Man, and you gotta bet on yourself, and

00:44:14.000 –> 00:44:16.000

you gotta go do it. So so I’m

00:44:16.000 –> 00:44:18.000

curious. I I’ve never done this before, but

00:44:18.000 –> 00:44:19.000

I’m gonna start doing this. I think I

00:44:19.000 –> 00:44:21.000

had this, pop in my mind. So the

00:44:21.000 –> 00:44:23.000

circuit of success, hence the podcast you’re on

00:44:23.000 –> 00:44:25.000

here. Yeah. The circuits of success are attitude,

00:44:26.000 –> 00:44:26.000

your beliefs,

00:44:27.000 –> 00:44:28.000

action,

00:44:28.000 –> 00:44:31.000

results. Right? So your attitude, your belief system,

00:44:31.000 –> 00:44:33.000

the action take, get your results. So when

00:44:33.000 –> 00:44:35.000

you hear those four, which one of those

00:44:35.000 –> 00:44:37.000

does dive deep into one of? Which word

00:44:37.000 –> 00:44:39.000

do you like? Attitude, beliefs, action, results?

00:44:40.000 –> 00:44:43.000

I think belief for me is the most

00:44:43.000 –> 00:44:44.000

powerful force in the world.

00:44:45.000 –> 00:44:47.000

You know, like that one for me trumps

00:44:47.000 –> 00:44:49.000

all of it.

00:44:49.000 –> 00:44:51.000

Meaning if if

00:44:52.000 –> 00:44:54.000

So you started the company because you believed

00:44:54.000 –> 00:44:56.000

success was possible. Mhmm. If you didn’t believe

00:44:56.000 –> 00:44:58.000

in it, you wouldn’t have done it. And

00:44:58.000 –> 00:44:59.000

that doesn’t mean you believed in it every

00:44:59.000 –> 00:45:01.000

single day. Right? We’re we’re human. We we

00:45:01.000 –> 00:45:03.000

have those moments of doubt and fear.

00:45:04.000 –> 00:45:07.000

But, like, the the car you drive that

00:45:07.000 –> 00:45:10.000

car exists because somebody believed it was possible.

00:45:10.000 –> 00:45:12.000

That car manufacturer exists because somebody thought I’m

00:45:12.000 –> 00:45:15.000

gonna I’m gonna create this. And the the

00:45:15.000 –> 00:45:17.000

school you went to, the town you’re from,

00:45:17.000 –> 00:45:19.000

All these things exist because somebody believed in

00:45:19.000 –> 00:45:21.000

it enough to take action. There may have

00:45:21.000 –> 00:45:23.000

been been several. It may have been hundreds

00:45:23.000 –> 00:45:24.000

of people who believed.

00:45:24.000 –> 00:45:25.000

I think it’s possible.

00:45:25.000 –> 00:45:27.000

But doubt eventually went out, and they didn’t

00:45:27.000 –> 00:45:29.000

figure out a way to create a university,

00:45:29.000 –> 00:45:31.000

to create a business, to create a car,

00:45:31.000 –> 00:45:33.000

to create a clothing brand, whatever it may

00:45:33.000 –> 00:45:33.000

be.

00:45:34.000 –> 00:45:36.000

Everything around us is created because somebody believed

00:45:36.000 –> 00:45:39.000

in it enough to actually take action on

00:45:39.000 –> 00:45:40.000

on those beliefs.

00:45:41.000 –> 00:45:43.000

And so I would say belief belief drives

00:45:43.000 –> 00:45:43.000

behavior.

00:45:44.000 –> 00:45:46.000

And belief will look for a way forward

00:45:46.000 –> 00:45:48.000

where doubt will look for a way out.

00:45:48.000 –> 00:45:50.000

And I think most people in life, right,

00:45:50.000 –> 00:45:52.000

we get on this path, early on, we

00:45:52.000 –> 00:45:54.000

believe our belief is high. Starting business, whatever

00:45:54.000 –> 00:45:55.000

it is. Like, man, this can be awesome.

00:45:55.000 –> 00:45:56.000

We can do it because we have no

00:45:56.000 –> 00:45:58.000

clue what that road’s gonna look like. We

00:45:58.000 –> 00:45:59.000

just think, like, Sarah, we think success is

00:45:59.000 –> 00:46:02.000

gonna go this way. We don’t anticipate all

00:46:02.000 –> 00:46:04.000

this this roundabout and chaos in in the

00:46:04.000 –> 00:46:05.000

middle of it.

00:46:05.000 –> 00:46:07.000

But for the people who who in the

00:46:07.000 –> 00:46:09.000

midst of that standard, I still I still

00:46:09.000 –> 00:46:10.000

believe in this thing that chose to run

00:46:10.000 –> 00:46:12.000

after. I still believe it’s possible. For me,

00:46:12.000 –> 00:46:13.000

it’s like

00:46:13.000 –> 00:46:15.000

going down, the highway,

00:46:16.000 –> 00:46:18.000

and there’s all these off ramps it’s gonna

00:46:18.000 –> 00:46:20.000

be hard, you might fail. They’re gonna laugh

00:46:20.000 –> 00:46:22.000

at you. You’re gonna lose everything. Like, whatever

00:46:22.000 –> 00:46:24.000

all the excuses the fears are, and if

00:46:24.000 –> 00:46:27.000

you if doubt is greater, as soon as

00:46:27.000 –> 00:46:28.000

you face a little bit of adversity,

00:46:29.000 –> 00:46:31.000

doubts, like, you’re right. I might fail. See

00:46:31.000 –> 00:46:33.000

you. I’m out. I’m gonna quit before I

00:46:33.000 –> 00:46:35.000

fail. And most people, they just they they

00:46:35.000 –> 00:46:37.000

have a life it’s almost like they’re just

00:46:37.000 –> 00:46:38.000

driving in a circle. Right? They get on

00:46:38.000 –> 00:46:40.000

be on the highway. Like, I believe it’s

00:46:40.000 –> 00:46:41.000

gonna be great.

00:46:41.000 –> 00:46:43.000

It gets hard. Oh, my might fail, and

00:46:43.000 –> 00:46:45.000

they get off. In the circle right back

00:46:45.000 –> 00:46:46.000

around and get on the next path. Oh,

00:46:46.000 –> 00:46:48.000

this is gonna be great. This is the

00:46:48.000 –> 00:46:49.000

one. It gets hard, and they take the

00:46:49.000 –> 00:46:51.000

next off ramp, and they just keep circling

00:46:51.000 –> 00:46:51.000

around.

00:46:52.000 –> 00:46:54.000

There’s people who believe, like, might be hard.

00:46:54.000 –> 00:46:56.000

That’s okay. I might fail. That’s okay. They

00:46:56.000 –> 00:46:58.000

might laugh at me. That’s okay. Because that

00:46:58.000 –> 00:47:00.000

belief is greater than their doubt, and, like,

00:47:00.000 –> 00:47:02.000

I’m gonna go figure out what’s possible. You

00:47:02.000 –> 00:47:03.000

know, and so I for me, I just

00:47:03.000 –> 00:47:06.000

think belief is such a powerful force. Yeah.

00:47:06.000 –> 00:47:08.000

Amen into that. So my final question on

00:47:08.000 –> 00:47:11.000

that, and, would be then belief in self,

00:47:11.000 –> 00:47:12.000

you know, I believe in a higher powers.

00:47:12.000 –> 00:47:14.000

Well, I believe in god. I believe in

00:47:14.000 –> 00:47:16.000

self. I believe in goal management or goal

00:47:16.000 –> 00:47:16.000

planning.

00:47:17.000 –> 00:47:19.000

Mhmm. Go achievement. All these things. Right? But

00:47:19.000 –> 00:47:20.000

The belief in yourself,

00:47:21.000 –> 00:47:23.000

how what would you recommend for people right

00:47:23.000 –> 00:47:25.000

now is to continue to grow that as

00:47:25.000 –> 00:47:25.000

much as possible. And there’s a fine line

00:47:25.000 –> 00:47:25.000

between arrogance

00:47:28.000 –> 00:47:30.000

and right? So how do we grow,

00:47:30.000 –> 00:47:31.000

in our belief in ourself?

00:47:33.000 –> 00:47:35.000

I think two things coming to mind. One,

00:47:35.000 –> 00:47:37.000

and then I know this gonna sound cheesy.

00:47:37.000 –> 00:47:40.000

So apologies to anyone listening, but cheesy works.

00:47:40.000 –> 00:47:42.000

One, I think, like, self affirmations.

00:47:43.000 –> 00:47:45.000

Like, I think think of the doubts that

00:47:45.000 –> 00:47:47.000

come in your mind. Like, write them down.

00:47:47.000 –> 00:47:48.000

I’m not good enough. I don’t have what

00:47:48.000 –> 00:47:49.000

it takes.

00:47:49.000 –> 00:47:52.000

People don’t believe in me. Whatever. All these

00:47:52.000 –> 00:47:53.000

lies that fill our brain

00:47:54.000 –> 00:47:56.000

that keep us from taking action. If you

00:47:56.000 –> 00:47:57.000

would write them down and write a truth

00:47:57.000 –> 00:48:00.000

next to it, like and or even write

00:48:00.000 –> 00:48:02.000

another column, of, like, who said that? Oh,

00:48:02.000 –> 00:48:03.000

nobody.

00:48:04.000 –> 00:48:06.000

Nobody said I would not get enough. Nobody

00:48:06.000 –> 00:48:07.000

said I can’t do it. Like, now maybe

00:48:07.000 –> 00:48:08.000

someone actually in your life, you know, you

00:48:08.000 –> 00:48:11.000

had some some jerk who put some negativity

00:48:11.000 –> 00:48:13.000

in in your mind, like Right. Most of

00:48:13.000 –> 00:48:14.000

the time, the person is us.

00:48:15.000 –> 00:48:18.000

And it’s like, oh, Well, okay. I’m the

00:48:18.000 –> 00:48:19.000

only person who said that, which means it’s

00:48:19.000 –> 00:48:21.000

not true. Well, what’s the truth of that?

00:48:21.000 –> 00:48:22.000

I am good enough. I do have what

00:48:22.000 –> 00:48:23.000

it takes.

00:48:23.000 –> 00:48:25.000

Whatever it may be, and so to to

00:48:25.000 –> 00:48:25.000

counter

00:48:26.000 –> 00:48:29.000

the lies with truth, and and that’s why

00:48:29.000 –> 00:48:30.000

I love, like, the power of belief in

00:48:30.000 –> 00:48:32.000

the brain. I’ve I’ve become just obsessed with

00:48:32.000 –> 00:48:34.000

the mind over the last, like, two years,

00:48:34.000 –> 00:48:35.000

three years,

00:48:35.000 –> 00:48:38.000

What what happens when you have a negative

00:48:38.000 –> 00:48:40.000

thought, it does actual brain damage.

00:48:41.000 –> 00:48:43.000

And so it weakens your brain. It weakens

00:48:43.000 –> 00:48:45.000

your brain’s ability to be innovative, to be

00:48:45.000 –> 00:48:47.000

creative, to be confident, to be focused, to

00:48:47.000 –> 00:48:50.000

be clear, to be calm. And so negativity

00:48:50.000 –> 00:48:52.000

does brain damage, which means you’re more likely

00:48:52.000 –> 00:48:54.000

to have more negative thoughts and does more

00:48:54.000 –> 00:48:55.000

brain damage. So,

00:48:56.000 –> 00:48:56.000

and when you have a positive thought, it

00:48:56.000 –> 00:48:57.000

it it strengthens your brain.

00:48:59.000 –> 00:49:02.000

Right? Positive thoughts re regenerate. They rebuild your

00:49:02.000 –> 00:49:04.000

brain to make you more confident, more clear,

00:49:04.000 –> 00:49:05.000

more creative, more innovative, more

00:49:07.000 –> 00:49:07.000

focused

00:49:07.000 –> 00:49:09.000

And so this idea of positive versus negative

00:49:09.000 –> 00:49:12.000

thinking, like, it’s actually changing. Your brain is

00:49:12.000 –> 00:49:12.000

not a,

00:49:13.000 –> 00:49:15.000

it’s not a a static thing. Right? It’s

00:49:15.000 –> 00:49:17.000

not fixed. It changes, and every thought is

00:49:17.000 –> 00:49:19.000

changing it. Your brain is it’s crazy. It’s

00:49:19.000 –> 00:49:21.000

like your our brain is

00:49:21.000 –> 00:49:23.000

a it it’s Gilliland.

00:49:23.000 –> 00:49:26.000

And fascinating, but it’s also very stupid. Your

00:49:26.000 –> 00:49:28.000

brain will believe whatever you tell it. Dings

00:49:28.000 –> 00:49:29.000

fast. That’s right.

00:49:30.000 –> 00:49:31.000

I think one, and you get to choose

00:49:31.000 –> 00:49:33.000

what you tell it. And so the more

00:49:33.000 –> 00:49:34.000

you practice, like and and so part of

00:49:34.000 –> 00:49:35.000

my morning routine,

00:49:36.000 –> 00:49:37.000

I’ve got mind body and soul. So I’ve

00:49:37.000 –> 00:49:39.000

got the the faith deal. I’ve got the

00:49:39.000 –> 00:49:40.000

workout.

00:49:40.000 –> 00:49:42.000

And then every day I write down ten

00:49:42.000 –> 00:49:43.000

things that I’m grateful for.

00:49:44.000 –> 00:49:45.000

And I started doing that during COVID when

00:49:45.000 –> 00:49:47.000

anxiety started to kick in a little bit.

00:49:48.000 –> 00:49:49.000

So I think number one is just some

00:49:49.000 –> 00:49:50.000

form of affirmations.

00:49:51.000 –> 00:49:53.000

You could even call these I’m statements. I

00:49:53.000 –> 00:49:54.000

I have a friend who she she works

00:49:54.000 –> 00:49:56.000

with the Air Force doing leadership training, and

00:49:56.000 –> 00:49:58.000

she was real nervous and insecure about it.

00:49:58.000 –> 00:50:00.000

She was real, like, sweet, quiet. So the

00:50:00.000 –> 00:50:01.000

moment, she’s like, what do I have to

00:50:01.000 –> 00:50:02.000

offer? She’s powerhouse.

00:50:03.000 –> 00:50:04.000

And so she put in her in her

00:50:04.000 –> 00:50:06.000

bone, like, every three hours, I’m confident.

00:50:07.000 –> 00:50:09.000

I’m a great leader. I have what it

00:50:09.000 –> 00:50:09.000

takes.

00:50:10.000 –> 00:50:12.000

And so it was just these reminders to

00:50:12.000 –> 00:50:13.000

her. And it started to reshape her brain

00:50:13.000 –> 00:50:15.000

to where she started to believe those things,

00:50:15.000 –> 00:50:17.000

then live those things. So number one, I

00:50:17.000 –> 00:50:19.000

think some form of self talk

00:50:19.000 –> 00:50:21.000

is really important. And I think number two

00:50:21.000 –> 00:50:24.000

is go go stack as many small successes

00:50:24.000 –> 00:50:26.000

as you possibly can. That could be going

00:50:26.000 –> 00:50:27.000

on a ten minute walk. That can be

00:50:27.000 –> 00:50:28.000

a success.

00:50:29.000 –> 00:50:31.000

It could be, what, like, having a difficult

00:50:31.000 –> 00:50:33.000

conversation. But but that builds confidence when you

00:50:33.000 –> 00:50:35.000

when you, you know, the other thing your

00:50:35.000 –> 00:50:37.000

brain does, If you have a hard task

00:50:37.000 –> 00:50:38.000

in front of you and you quit,

00:50:40.000 –> 00:50:42.000

it’s like railroad tracks are being laid in

00:50:42.000 –> 00:50:44.000

your brain. And when you quit, there’s a

00:50:44.000 –> 00:50:46.000

gap. The railroad tracks don’t finish.

00:50:46.000 –> 00:50:48.000

And so the next time you’re in a

00:50:48.000 –> 00:50:50.000

difficult situation, your brain doesn’t know how to

00:50:50.000 –> 00:50:51.000

finish the hard task. It’s like all it

00:50:51.000 –> 00:50:53.000

knows what to do is is to quit

00:50:54.000 –> 00:50:56.000

When you complete it, it it’s like it

00:50:56.000 –> 00:50:58.000

lays that railroad track and it finishes it.

00:50:58.000 –> 00:50:59.000

It completes the track. And so the next

00:50:59.000 –> 00:51:01.000

time you’re in a hard situation, your brain’s

00:51:01.000 –> 00:51:02.000

like, oh, I know what to do here.

00:51:02.000 –> 00:51:03.000

I know how to finish. I know how

00:51:03.000 –> 00:51:05.000

to do hard things, which is part of

00:51:05.000 –> 00:51:07.000

why, like, just the value of working out

00:51:07.000 –> 00:51:10.000

every day. It’s hard. It’s not fun. Most

00:51:10.000 –> 00:51:11.000

days I don’t wanna finish it. Like, this

00:51:11.000 –> 00:51:13.000

is killing me. I wanna Oh, I’m like,

00:51:13.000 –> 00:51:14.000

I’ve got five more minutes. I can do

00:51:14.000 –> 00:51:16.000

anything for five more minutes, whatever it is.

00:51:16.000 –> 00:51:18.000

But part of part of me doing that

00:51:18.000 –> 00:51:19.000

one is my own just physical health, but

00:51:19.000 –> 00:51:21.000

two training your brain to to deal with

00:51:21.000 –> 00:51:23.000

adversity to do hard things. And so those

00:51:23.000 –> 00:51:25.000

things build confidence when you need confidence.

00:51:26.000 –> 00:51:28.000

Yeah. So strong. I I think about that

00:51:28.000 –> 00:51:30.000

made me think about what I call comfort

00:51:30.000 –> 00:51:32.000

zone callus. Right? Your comfort zone is so

00:51:32.000 –> 00:51:34.000

small when we start out. Right? But then

00:51:34.000 –> 00:51:35.000

if you do something,

00:51:35.000 –> 00:51:37.000

it gets it just keeps getting a little

00:51:37.000 –> 00:51:39.000

bit bigger. Right? So then your hand, if

00:51:39.000 –> 00:51:40.000

it’s if you have a callus from, you

00:51:40.000 –> 00:51:41.000

know, work or whatever it may be, you

00:51:41.000 –> 00:51:43.000

just you gotta go around the callus, right,

00:51:43.000 –> 00:51:45.000

and figure out a way out to get

00:51:45.000 –> 00:51:47.000

out of your comfort zone. So well, Kevin,

00:51:47.000 –> 00:51:48.000

this has been awesome. And where do our

00:51:48.000 –> 00:51:51.000

listeners find more of, Kevin DeShazo?

00:51:52.000 –> 00:51:54.000

Yeah. So I’m on every social media platform,

00:51:54.000 –> 00:51:56.000

just at Kevin DeShazo,

00:51:56.000 –> 00:51:58.000

Twitter or X and and Instagram, probably the

00:51:58.000 –> 00:52:01.000

two that I’m most active on, LinkedIn fairly

00:52:01.000 –> 00:52:01.000

active as well.

00:52:02.000 –> 00:52:04.000

You’re welcome to just go to the website.

00:52:04.000 –> 00:52:05.000

DeShazo dot me.

00:52:06.000 –> 00:52:07.000

If you’re in sports,

00:52:07.000 –> 00:52:10.000

our sports leadership company is be better leaders

00:52:10.000 –> 00:52:12.000

dot com. So those are those are the

00:52:12.000 –> 00:52:13.000

easiest places to find me. It’s so great

00:52:13.000 –> 00:52:14.000

to have you on the circuit success, man.

00:52:14.000 –> 00:52:16.000

Appreciate your time. Absolutely. I honor to be

00:52:16.000 –> 00:52:17.000

with you.

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The Circuit of Success Podcast with Brett GillilandBy BEYOND Media Group

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