You work hard. You show up. You’ve stopped doing the wrong things and started doing the right ones. But somehow, your wife still says she doesn’t feel loved.
She says you’re robotic. Emotionless. That you only care about work or money.

So why doesn’t all your effort seem to count?

In Part 3 of this powerful series, we break down one of the biggest misunderstandings in rebuilding emotional intimacy: how men think they’re showing love vs. how their wives experience it.

Inside this episode:

• Why doing the “right” things isn’t enough if you’re not narrating your thoughts

• How a man’s silence can make him look careless—even when he’s deeply invested

• A masculine way to show emotional investment without forcing tears

• Why unspoken effort often feels invisible to your wife

• How setting a 5-minute timer can completely shift how connected she feels to you

Rebuilding intimacy doesn’t require emotional theatrics. It requires visible, verbal care. Learn how to speak what you’re already thinking—and finally let her feel what you’ve always meant.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/circus-mirrors-and-feedback-sessions/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiWm9KuATGM

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You’re saying the right things. You’re apologizing. You’ve changed your behavior.
So why does your wife still say she “doesn’t feel anything from you”? Why does she say you seem like a robot, even when you’re doing everything right?

In Part 2 of this emotional intimacy series, we unpack the difference between words and presence, between logic and emotional safety. You'll learn:

• Why emotional intimacy isn’t about crying—it’s about proving you care

• The hidden emotional gaps you might not realize you're still leaving

• Why your wife keeps bringing up “old stuff” (and why that’s not the problem)

• How to map out and preempt her concerns like an engineer rebuilding trust

• Why your ability to predict and own the emotional impact of your past builds more trust than “fixing” anything

This isn’t just a conversation about feelings—it’s a guide for rebuilding emotional safety with precision, clarity, and masculine strength.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/the-warrior-code/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ZNpCyQ1ISY

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You want emotional intimacy. You want your wife to trust you again. But every time you try to rebuild connection, it falls apart.

Why?

Because most men try to skip Season Four—the hard, private work of rebuilding their identity, refining their values, and proving consistency before emotional closeness can return.

In this episode, we walk through:

• What “Season Four” really is—and why jumping ahead destroys trust

• Why your wife still pulls away, even when you “feel ready”

• How your emotional clumsiness may be coming off as spiritual danger

• The difference between verbal, cognitive, and emotional intimacy—and why each one builds on the last

• What it really takes to become a trustworthy, emotionally safe husband again

If you’ve been “working on yourself” but your wife isn’t responding, it may be because you’re still skipping the most important prep work. This episode breaks it down in practical, direct steps—no fluff, no pretending.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/the-4-seasons-of-a-healthy-and-happy-marriage/

Rather Watch Something? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CD4VvBPz5fo

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Why does your progress feel like a betrayal to your wife… even when you're doing the right thing?

In Part 4 of this series, we unpack one of the most painful (and hidden) myths sabotaging emotional intimacy: the belief that “my addiction only hurt me” and “she doesn’t get to share the story.”

This episode confronts:

• The emotional whiplash your wife feels when your private healing becomes a public pain

• Why “you can’t tell anyone” is often a cover for shame, not privacy

• The difference between protecting her trust vs. controlling the narrative

• How authentic wives live one story—and why husbands living a “dual life” creates chaos

• What it really means to support her growth, even when it’s painful for you

• How to know if you're secure enough to empathize with her pain more than your own

If your wife keeps hurting—and you don’t know why—this episode might give you answers no one else has dared to say out loud.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/the-story-of-my-deliverance-from-the-shackles-of-satan/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3iDRvMIqms

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Why does your wife still feel distant—even when you’re finally getting it right?

In this episode, we dive into one of the most frustrating (and overlooked) moments in recovery and reconciliation: the emotional whiplash your wife experiences when you grow in silence and then suddenly announce your progress.

In Part 3 of this powerful series, we explore:

• Why simply “sharing your growth” can still feel painful to your wife

• The secret to communicating progress in a way that actually builds trust

• A step-by-step phrase to lower her anxiety at the start of any hard conversation

• How to share your journey without making her feel left behind or judged

• Why “beginning with the end in mind” and “seeking miracles” changes everything

• The myth that “she’s not allowed to talk about my mistakes” — and how that belief damages emotional intimacy

If you’ve ever thought, “I’m improving… so why does she still feel unsafe?” — this episode is for you.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/letter-to-my-returned-missionary-self/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ks65eS6bJIs&t=1s

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You’ve made a breakthrough. You’ve figured out what went wrong and you’re finally on the right path. So why does your wife still seem disconnected… or even upset?

In Part 2 of this powerful conversation, we unpack the often-missed truth behind emotional whiplash: when men share the destination of their growth without taking their wife along for the journey.

We discuss:

• Why your wife may not trust your progress unless she sees how you got there

• The iceberg analogy: why she can’t see your internal work

• How to bring her into your reflection without being dragged into shame

• Why slowing the process down might save the relationship, not sabotage it

• How your excitement can unintentionally leave her behind

• The power of starting with “I was reflecting…”

• What it really means to “walk her through” your progress instead of dumping it on her

This episode is for husbands who are trying, but keep hearing:

“You still don’t get it.”
Even when you thought you did.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/the-warrior-code/⁠

Rather Watch Something? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lw-KuldXksI

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You’ve been grinding. You’ve made real progress. You’re excited to share the breakthroughs you’ve had—only to watch your wife shut down, get emotional, or pull away. Why does it feel like every time you move forward, it throws her off balance?

In this episode, we explore the unexpected emotional whiplash that can happen when men start improving, but don’t realize they’ve left their wives out of the journey.

You’ll learn:

• Why your growth can feel like abandonment to your wife

• The mistake of “arriving home” in task-mode instead of connection-mode

• Why she interprets your excitement as disconnection

• How to signal the difference between accomplishment and emotional engagement

• The “locomotive mode” mistake—and how to slow it down before causing harm

• How to approach shared experiences without knocking her off the track

This episode is for the man who’s trying hard, but keeps hearing:

“You’re still not really here with me.”

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/the-advanced-reflective-listening-tool/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5wPvF8YD0w&t=1s

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You’ve been quietly working on yourself. You're reviewing the past, building stronger habits, and doing the deep work—but the moment your wife senses progress, she wants emotional intimacy now.

And you’re not ready.

This episode dives into one of the most overlooked struggles in marriage repair: how to lead the relationship forward when you're still in the middle of your personal growth—and she's already asking for more than you can give.

Learn:

• Why emotional intimacy requires a tested, not rushed, structure

• How to communicate “I’m not ready yet” in a way that builds trust

• The biggest mistake wives often make in rebuilding, and how to respond with grace

• What it means to build an “invisible airplane”—and why she won’t believe it’s real until she sees it fly

• How to show your inner work when she can’t see the results (yet)

• Why paper practice (like D-PARs) prepares your mouth for real conversations

If you’ve ever felt like your wife is asking for connection before your internal system is stable enough to support it—this episode is for you.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/french-fry-machine-metaphor/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H4xkLIW4zM4&t=1s

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

“I’ve changed. I’ve worked hard. So why doesn’t she trust me yet?”

In Part 4 of this essential series, we unpack the real reason why your wife may still carry pain—even after you’ve put in months of work. Emotional intimacy isn’t about looking strong. It’s about being reliable when tested. Just like a bridge under pressure, trust is built not by appearance but by how much it holds up when life hits hard.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why your wife’s pain doesn’t vanish just because you’ve improved

• How real trust is built by sledgehammer-tested systems, not pretty words

• The purpose of emotional intimacy and what not to expect in return

• How to walk her through your growth without needing her approval

• The crucial difference between a “full disclosure” and real emotional rebuilding

• What it looks like to lead without shortcuts—even when you're tired

If you’re a man trying to rebuild trust with a woman who’s been hurt, this is your roadmap.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/the-battle-of-perspectives-laman-nephi-and-the-power-of-faith/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9kqP6p5Qw0

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You’ve put in six months of work. You’ve grown. You’ve changed. But it still feels like she looks at you like the same guy who messed up. Why?

In Part 3 of this powerful series, we confront the painful disconnect that happens when you're doing deep inner work—but your spouse doesn’t acknowledge it. You want trust, connection, and a fresh start... but you’re stuck in the shadows of who you used to be.

This episode covers:

• Why emotional intimacy feels like hitting the Rocky Mountains of marriage repair

• How to handle it when she doesn’t believe you’ve changed—even if you have

• What it really means to “go first” in rebuilding trust

• Why you must treat her like she’s grown, too—even when you can’t see it

• The hidden weight of connection that most couples overlook

• And how to stop waiting for validation and start standing confidently in your growth

This is not about waiting to be rewarded. It’s about becoming the kind of man who leads with patience, strength, and emotional skill—even when it feels thankless.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/adhd-blog-comorbidities/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5S67HKpKUaA&t=3s

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠