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We're back! This week I sit down with Dr. Joshua Gebhardt — a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in mixed-orientation couples — to explore what really happens when guys come out to their wives as queer. Drawing from his doctoral research and years of clinical experience, Joshua breaks down the most common challenges couples face after disclosure, why shame and panic often dominate the early stages, and how counselors can either help or unintentionally harm these vulnerable relationships. We unpack the most common relationship outcomes (and how to know which is most likely...), the role of sexual identity (bi v. gay v. something else), how couples navigate opening up their relationship (or not), the best and worst therapy models, and what it takes to navigate authenticity, safety, and connection when everything feels at stake.
Stay tuned for Part 2, coming next week, where we go deeper into Joshua's personal queer journey. You won't want to miss it.
The Gebhardt Group: https://www.thegebhardtgroup.co/home
Email Joshua directly: [email protected]
Sign up for Dr. Gebhardt’s Group, “Women Navigating Marriages with Gay or Bisexual Men”: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe-0jju_kpELwu9HPnwP6LA720NcnkYR7UR3lGRcdedqrWqgg/viewform
Support for people in Mixed-Orientation Marriages:
HOW (Husbands Out to Wives): https://how-support.org/
GAMMA: https://www.gammasupport.org/
MOR (Mixed-Orientation Marriages) & More: https://www.morandmore.org/
Mixed Orientation Marriage: Pathways to Success (Free E-Book): https://mixedorientation.com/
AlternatePath (for women who have discovered their husbands are bi or gay): https://groups.io/g/AlternatePath
(Note: these show notes previously and erroneously mentioned "OurPath", which is not my recommendation and which has been traumatic for people I've spoken to.)
More from Rob & Two Bi Guys:
Support Two Bi Guys on Patreon! (Bonus content, early access, and more) https://www.patreon.com/robertbrookscohen
Two Bi Guys on YouTube: youtube.com/@twobiguys
Subscribe to my newsletter (for updates on group coaching and more): https://www.robertbrookscohen.com/newsletter
Book a free intro call with me (re: individual coaching): https://calendly.com/robertbrookscohen/25-minute-free-intro-call
Attend “Fluid Conversations”: https://calendly.com/robertbrookscohen/fluid-conversations
Visit my website: https://www.robertbrookscohen.com/
Follow TBG on IG (and message me for direct correspondence): https://www.instagram.com/twobiguys/
By Robert Cohen4.8
187187 ratings
We're back! This week I sit down with Dr. Joshua Gebhardt — a licensed marriage and family therapist who specializes in mixed-orientation couples — to explore what really happens when guys come out to their wives as queer. Drawing from his doctoral research and years of clinical experience, Joshua breaks down the most common challenges couples face after disclosure, why shame and panic often dominate the early stages, and how counselors can either help or unintentionally harm these vulnerable relationships. We unpack the most common relationship outcomes (and how to know which is most likely...), the role of sexual identity (bi v. gay v. something else), how couples navigate opening up their relationship (or not), the best and worst therapy models, and what it takes to navigate authenticity, safety, and connection when everything feels at stake.
Stay tuned for Part 2, coming next week, where we go deeper into Joshua's personal queer journey. You won't want to miss it.
The Gebhardt Group: https://www.thegebhardtgroup.co/home
Email Joshua directly: [email protected]
Sign up for Dr. Gebhardt’s Group, “Women Navigating Marriages with Gay or Bisexual Men”: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe-0jju_kpELwu9HPnwP6LA720NcnkYR7UR3lGRcdedqrWqgg/viewform
Support for people in Mixed-Orientation Marriages:
HOW (Husbands Out to Wives): https://how-support.org/
GAMMA: https://www.gammasupport.org/
MOR (Mixed-Orientation Marriages) & More: https://www.morandmore.org/
Mixed Orientation Marriage: Pathways to Success (Free E-Book): https://mixedorientation.com/
AlternatePath (for women who have discovered their husbands are bi or gay): https://groups.io/g/AlternatePath
(Note: these show notes previously and erroneously mentioned "OurPath", which is not my recommendation and which has been traumatic for people I've spoken to.)
More from Rob & Two Bi Guys:
Support Two Bi Guys on Patreon! (Bonus content, early access, and more) https://www.patreon.com/robertbrookscohen
Two Bi Guys on YouTube: youtube.com/@twobiguys
Subscribe to my newsletter (for updates on group coaching and more): https://www.robertbrookscohen.com/newsletter
Book a free intro call with me (re: individual coaching): https://calendly.com/robertbrookscohen/25-minute-free-intro-call
Attend “Fluid Conversations”: https://calendly.com/robertbrookscohen/fluid-conversations
Visit my website: https://www.robertbrookscohen.com/
Follow TBG on IG (and message me for direct correspondence): https://www.instagram.com/twobiguys/

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