More Happy Life with Andy Proctor

There was once a girl 

With a hole in her heart.

Little Love was her name.

Where was she to start?

It was not of her doing. 

She was not to blame.

But the hole in her heart

Was there just the same.

In this interview, Rose and I talk about how easy it is to get caught up in allowing other people to tell us what our worth is. However, we never should forget that it is ultimately the love we have for ourselves that is most important. This beautiful truth is illustrated in a new children's book called Little Love. 

More about the book:

Join Little Love on her path to self-discovery where she meets Beauty and Fame, and learns the true value of her self-worth. Written for children, but with a timeless message for the child in all of us, Little Love reaffirms the importance of self-acceptance in life's journey toward love, joy, and friendship.

Rose Stanek is an award winning graphic designer, interior designer, and now children's book author who is actually a full-time Amazonian (she works for Amazon). She is the mother of two cowcats, Monty and Tyson, and calls the Pacific Northwest home. She loves creative storytelling, and empowering others to live their dreams.

To find Rose's book, click here: https://amzn.to/2PEGyKu

See her website here: https://rosestanek.com

Have you ever experienced something difficult or traumatic? If you're listening to this, the answer is probably yes. I believe that a huge part of happiness is the skillset we have built up that enables us to bounce back from the difficult things that happen to us. A few weeks ago, I went to the TEDxSLC event and saw Em Capito speak about what she calls "resiliency field trips." These are adventurous experiences that encourage us to get out of our comfort zone and do something intentional to challenge ourselves. It includes curiosity, fun and adventure. As a psychotherapist, Em has been helping people to have these experiences and has found that with those who have done them, a sharp decline in fear occurs. In order to qualify as a resiliency field trip, it has to have the following:

1. New - when we introduce novelty, our brain will be more likely to remember it. This is why travel is often so memorable.

2. Slightly scary - Step out of your comfort zone to push the limits of what you currently believe you are capable of.

3. Intentional - This must be something you value or something that excites you. 

Intentional discomfort is important to engage in if we want to overcome anxiety or make progress toward goals that we deeply value, but we are afraid to accomplish.

In this interview we talk about why it is so hard to get outside of our comfort zone and why it is so important. 

More about Em Capito:

Em Capito is an unconventional psychotherapist obsessed with the widespread loss of resilience in the face of overwhelming comfort. While studying her own trauma from the inside out, Em embarked on a series of experiments that led to a prescription of intentional discomfort. Em blends these experiential interventions with meditation and yoga therapy to build the holistic mind-body resilience that carries us through our darkest moments. She completed a master’s degree in social work at the University of Utah in 2007 and a masters in business administration at the University of Phoenix in 2011. Em is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, a certified LifePower yoga teacher, and a Dharma Method meditation teacher with a private practice in Salt Lake City, Utah.

Find and follow Em here:

https://emcapito.com/

https://www.instagram.com/emcapito/

https://emcapito.com/fridays

Today I interview the very knowledgable Dr. Adam Moore. We talk about how we go about making a change happen in our life. He relates changing to launching a rocket into space to escape the world's gravity. The elements are:

He also gives some key advice on how to be happier today:

This is a great episode. Don't miss it!

Find Adam here: 

https://adammmoore.com/

https://www.instagram.com/dradammoore/

Today I just wanted to share something one of my therapists shared with me years ago that has helped me. It was what they called my "Personal Bill of Rights". It has helped me over the years to remember that I have permission to be human. Often we don't give ourselves this permission and we need to remember this more. So this is me giving you permission today, to be happier. 

How do you empower people to empower other people? The more I talk to people about positive psychology, the more I realize that the thing that most people want to know is how they can become a change agent themselves. In this episode, I interview Louis Alloro, an shining star in applied positive psychology who I had the honor of learning from for 7 months during my time studying at The Flourishing Center in Los Angeles. 

Louis and I talk about how to really create sustainable positive change in an organization through systems. We also talk about the following topics:

So much goodness came from this episode. It was an amazing conversation that I wish could have only been longer. Please listen and share with your friends!

Do you want to boost your energy without having to pound another RedBull or go for the afternoon cup of Joe? This episode is for you. 

A lot of people struggle with fatigue, or are just sapped of energy on a regular basis. I believe that increasing energy is one of the most powerful ways to have a more happy life and I want to share things that can help you boost your energy without caffeine.

First, a word on caffeine. I don’t have anything against caffeine other than that it was the stimulant that triggered my first panic attack ever. So ever since then, I have chosen not to consume caffeine to boost my energy and I have had to find other ways to keep me awake when I’m having a tired day. The other thing is that caffeine doesn’t actually produce energy in your body. It is a stimulant. It basically tricks your brain into thinking that you have energy, but it doesn’t actually have the building blocks of energy that your body needs.

So here are some ways to boost energy without having to rely on that cup of Joe every day.

1. Hydration

2. Move more

3. Eat smaller meals more often

4. Optimize your Breathing

5. Sleep better

6. Eat things that boost your energy

7. Decrease your Allostatic Load

8. Connect to Your Purpose and Values

9. Rock Out to Your Favorite Songs

10. Connect to People You Love

11. Look Forward to Something

Studies show that our wellbeing can be greatly impacted by our commute, but that it's what we believe about our commute that makes the difference. Here are 8 tips that can help you tell the right story and make your commute the best part of your day. 

Mindfulness -

Education-

Dealing with road ragers-

What’s your story of the commute?

Savor the good stuff

Change it up

Dance party

Connect

Use it as a transition to boost energy

Here is where I found the studies: https://www.forbes.com/sites/amymorin/2014/12/07/want-to-be-happier-change-your-commute-or-change-your-attitude/#7daa21e77417

When was the last time you felt overwhelmingly happy? When I have asked this to people in the past, it has almost always paired with a time when they were having fun. We have talked about play before (episode 105), and in this episode Mike differentiates play from fun and shares some great tips on how we can fit more fun into our every day life. 

He tells the story of how he got into researching fun in the first place and talks about how fun can really have an impact on our wellbeing. He expounds on his play model (found here: https://michaelrucker.com/having-fun/optimize-having-fun-play-model/) and shows us how we can optimize the fun that we are already having. 

Find Mike here: 

https://michaelrucker.com

https://twitter.com/performbetter

https://www.facebook.com/mike.rucker.phd

https://www.instagram.com/thewonderoffun/

Dr. Mike Rucker is a charter member of the International Positive Psychology Association, as well as a member of the American Psychological Association. Mike is a frequent contributor to national press such as Forbes, the Wall Street Journal, and CIO on topics related to well-being. Mike has spent the last few years studying the construct of fun and is coming out with a book on the subject in the summer of 2020. He has also published in peer-reviewed journals covering topics from employee well-being to ethics.

In this episode we talk about all things sleep and much more!

More about Julie:

Julie Flygare, J.D. is an internationally recognized patient-perspective leader, an accomplished advocate, and the award-winning author of Wide Awake and Dreaming: A Memoir of Narcolepsy. Since receiving a diagnosis of narcolepsy with cataplexy in 2007, Flygare advanced her leadership in the sleep and healthcare space through speaking engagements, publications, earned media, collaborations, and advocacy and awareness initiatives. Currently, she serves as President & CEO of Project Sleep, a non-profit organization raising awareness about sleep health and sleep disorders. Prior to accepting this role, Flygare served as President of Project Sleep’s Board of Directors, while also gaining invaluable experience in marketing and philanthropy at the Pancreatic Cancer Action Network and City of Hope. Additionally, she served on the National Institutes of Health’s Sleep Disorders Research Advisory Board from 2012 – 2015. Flygare received her B.A. from Brown University in 2005 and her J.D. from Boston College Law School in 2009, focusing on health law, policy, and rare disease drug development.

Where to find Julie:

Have you walked down the street and seen a homeless person and thought: "they just need to get a job"? You're not alone. Bob Dalton also thought this before his well-educated, hard-working mother became homeless in 2013. It was at this time that Bob decided he needed to do something not just to help his mom, but to help the homeless. This episode is the story of how Bob founded his company Sackcloth and Ashes that gives away tens of thousands of blankets to the homeless each month. Bob is an inspiration because he has used his strengths of creativity and entrepreneurship to fighting against an injustice in the world. 

We talk about how he was contacted by Instagram - YES Instagram - to feature his Instagram account, gaining them 20,000 followers overnight. This launched his business to the next level. For Bob it was bigger than just selling blankets or giving blankets to shelters. It was about building a legacy of something bigger than himself. 

What can you do to build a legacy bigger than yourself? Listen to this episode to be inspired to grow, to work hard for something you believe in and to make the world a better place. 

Find Bob here:

https://www.instagram.com/sackclothxashes/

https://www.instagram.com/bobxdalton/

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuBiQYL1aIWqdTkk0NBcG2g

https://sackclothandashes.com/