Mornings with Morty

Matt's grandma plays matchmaker (he requested trashy hookers and she delivered. He paid them in Bitcoin). Carl & Matt are team Pedialyte over Gatorade. And Matt got sexually harassed in the Metaverse at work. No, the workplace sexual harassment training did not cover this. Be sure to follow us on IG @TheDailyMort, email your stories to [email protected], tell a friend about us, and follow Matt's latest venture @NYCTinySinks. L'chaim. Stay Frosty. Slava Ukraini.

It's late. I'm tired. You're not reading this anyway. It's the second episode of the second year of Mornings with Morty, published on 2/22/2022. Big 2 energy. That means nothing in Judaism but it's a thing on everyone's calendar right now and by the time you hear this episode, the excitement will have passed. What would the hosts do for a million dollars? Find out somewhere at like the 3/4 mark of the episode I think. It gets very inappropriate and I hope you enjoy (isn't that why you c*m for us--I mean come to us). Anyway, @TheDailyMort on IG, [email protected]. Listen, share, subscribe. And be sure to follow Matt's new account, @NYCTinySinks! We'll talk about that another time.

It's the (very delayed) first episode of 2022, habibis. YEAR TWO OF MORNINGS WITH MORTY! And it is THE YEAR OF CHUTZPAH. We recorded a while ago so I can't remember everything, but I know we talked Jewish representation/"Jew-face"/Jewish stereotypes, names, and images; the hostage situation at a Dallas-Fort Worth synagogue, and combating antisemitism. Don't worry, there are funny parts too. Anyway, check out the ADL and AJC. Follow us on IG @TheDailyMort, email us at [email protected]. Listen, review, share. It is a year of GROWTH. 

We recorded this so long ago I can't even remember what we talked about. You have no idea what I went through to get this episode out to you guys. We've got one more coming before the end of the year. Listen, share, subscribe. Tell everyone at your New Year's Eve party about us. Give us a follow on IG @TheDailyMort and email your holiday conundrums to [email protected]. Thanks for listening, happy new year, and we'll see you in our next episode before 2022.

WE'RE BACK, BABY! Reunited and it feels so good. Carl & Matt, the most iconic podcast duo since Springsteen & Obama, with 0% as many DUIs. Matt's dating life is up for debate. Lotta matches, zero girlfriends. Is he too picky or simply undateable? ¿Porqué no los dos? Follow us on IG @TheDailyMort and email [email protected] to let us know what you think. Listen, share, review us on Apple Podcasts. Thanks for being part of the cult as our first year comes to a close.

Grown men on electric scooters. A ride in the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. OnlyFans trying to be less HOLEsome and more WHOLEsome. We've got it all in episode 22. This episode is brought to you by Rudy Giuliani's OnlyFans--use code MELTINGG1ULIANI for 69% off. Listen. Share. Subscribe. Submit to the cult. Tell everyone at your Rosh Hashanah dinner to check us out and leave us a SWEET review on Apple Podcasts for a sweet start to the new year. Shana tova & l'chaim & stay frosty. (Follow on IG @TheDailyMort, email [email protected])

A wet and wild one for episode 21. Air travel is too accessible, we have inappropriate conversations with our families, and we're secretly both white trash. Give us a follow on IG @TheDailyMort and let us know the most white trash thing about YOU in our comments or in an email to [email protected]. Listen, share, repeat until our Cult de Mort has taken over the world (it's a better option than the Taliban). L'chaim.

Carl is BACK, baby! We're reunited and it feels so good. We even meet a new character, Klaus the Klutz. As always, this episode is brought to you by Levine's Kosher Lasers--WHEN YOU NEED PRECISION, GET A SPACE CIRCUMCISION! Today, we drink vodka with our comrades and talk about how nauseating social media is. Still need some fan feedback on the Allen v. Spacey, Antz v. A Bug's Life, Termites v. Grasshoppers debate. Be sure to follow us on IG @TheDailyMort so you can DM us or send your email [email protected] to cast your vote. As always, please share with a friend and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts!