"God gives us our children to heal and transform us." - Kyle Wester

 

Summary

In many ways, being a parent is less about our kids and more about our own formation!  When we lean into the vocation of parenthood, God can use every experience with our children to show us His love and to form us into the person He has created us to be.  In this podcast, we talk to Kyle and Sara Wester, counselors and hosts of the podcast The Art of Raising Humans. During our conversation, they explained four different parenting styles that we move in and out of depending on our life circumstances, how our marriage is actually the most important parenting tool we have, and how our understanding of who we are in the eyes of God affects how we relate to our kids.  This podcast is full of great insights for parents and we know you will gain from the Wester’s wisdom.  

 

Key Takeaways

• Children need to be taught relationship skills and correct behavior.  The most powerful way they learn is by watching how you relate to your spouse. 

• God gives us our children to heal and transform us.  To love our children effectively, we need to first receive God’s love for us personally. 

• Every conflict with our spouse or children is about expectations.  

• When our child exhibits behavior that is inappropriate for a situation, we need to ask ourselves, “What is this behavior telling me about this child?”

• Discipline comes from discipleship and the foundation of discipleship is relationship.  We all must work on having a deep and rich relationship with our children to form them.  

• There are 4 different parenting styles that we move through depending on our life circumstances.  We don’t always choose what is best, but we can keep in mind the goal of Loving Guidance and move towards that. 

• Recommended books from the Westers:

• Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids by Dr. Laura Markham

• Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by by Rebecca Bailey

• Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen

• No Drama Discipline by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson

 

Couple Discussion Questions

1. Are we happy with how we are modeling conflict resolution for our children? How can we do this better? 

2. What in our children do we see in ourselves?  Write these things down.  Do we love these things in ourselves? Why or why not?  

Resources:

 

The Art of Raising Humans Podcast Link 

 

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