NOTE: No Season intro this time. The file fell into the wrong hands. We're doing Undergrounders this season, try to keep up!

While you're distracted by the pile of precious gems, we're reaching for the real treasure: compassionate knowledge - and the Amulet, of course. On the first episode of the season, we're talking about your unknowable, shapeless neighbor to the south, Grootslang. This thing has characteristics AND behaviors.

Please stop telling all your friends about the podcast. We really wanted this to be more of a niche, Velvet Underground-type thing.

We will answer questions, yes! But, we will also leave the soil of your mind fertile and ready for new and exciting inquiries of your own. Plant them now and soon you will be ready to harvest your mind crops. But beware of brain gophers. They will burrow in and then you can't get them out except by telling all your sister's secrets. Don't have a sister? Well, now you've got something almost as good: brain gophers!

Fido, shake... Wait - Not like that! Ouchie!

What's that sound; Is it an underwater baby? No, Mujeres, it's a new episode of Mr. Foot. And, we're talking about an Aztec monster who knows how to make that azz tec, you know what I'm saying?

They're a-swirling and a-swooping, and you better believe they're a-pooping. On all the statues! They're called flying humanoids and they're causing problems for cities across Mexico. 

Promise me you'll never fall in love with a man who doesn't take his supper on the dry earth - and take a listen to our podcast to learn all the weak points of a sky-surfing demon.

Do you have faith of the heart to love a witchay woman? On the second episode of the season, we're talking about Mexico's greatest heroes of unpaid social labor: Brujas. What is that? click the play button you big dummy.

Some call it the land of 1000 lakes. I don't care if this place has 2000 lakes, it's on something called the Tropic of Cancer. What the? That's something I love plus something I hate. I feel like I'm watching an epic Jedi battle.

Mexico.

We are doing seasons now B. T. W. Bush.

The tragic and beautiful tale of one powerful primate that strived to become more than just a monkey. I guess in a lot of ways he was an ex-monkey. Sometimes we have to cast off our old selves to be born anew in a tank of amniotic fluid. Don't believe me? Read the blueprints. They aren't always blue in real life, though. Don't let that freak you out.

Sincerely,

Laboratory Man

It's our first episode in a shorter format we're calling Little Tootsies. Longer episodes will still continue, but this allows us talk about some topics more briefly.

On this episode we asked the timeless question, "What are you doing with that fish bone comb?" And, we changed into something a little more comfortable with Selkies - or as I like to call them - Selks. My Merm Selk brings all the boats to the yard.

Can you believe the size of these things? They're what my great grandfather would call "large". We spoke in ancient tongues about the mysteries of god's tallest children, and I wouldn't trade our discussion for five magical beans. 

Toodles.

The spectre we tried to understand in this episode was the elusive concept of time, itself. Both Randy and Dawson tried to write a song explaining time travel, but ran out of time. I want you to just sit there and think about that for a minute.

You're HG Welcome for a very good episode. Special thank you to our listener, Deremy.