In this amazingly incredible episode, we tackle racism, the issue of kneeling in the NFL, how to make football safer and more exciting, inquire about the status of clothing sales during the afterlife, Detroit (in general, also repeatedly), and so much more that I cannot possibly even begin to remember half of it all. You'd have to be a real grade-A jerk to miss this one!

Well, this one was uploaded just a little late. Topics include the impending Florida hurricane, me making fun of Baked Alaska on Twitter (which ultimately resulted in my account being suspended), It, clowns, meat from pickup trucks, suicide, birds, and all sorts of everything else.

I nearly DIE when my brain breaks down (yes, again) and I begin suffering from the incurable disease: MUMMIES ON MY MIND! Then we move to TV show theme songs and talk about various insane bullcrud neither of us had absolutely ANY intention of originally doing.

The Lifetime Network! Cancer! Gluing eyeballs on top of your eyeballs! Abusing women! Abusing men! Getting sick! Building a Mexican wall from tombstones! So much more!

Supermarket Sweeps, Nickelodeon GUTS, Who Doesn't Want to be a MIllionaire, "Oh God, I Lost: The Game Show," "Who Wants to Marry an Elf King?", how to not tread on snakes, Garden Hoes, Game of Thrones, Sean Hannity, Star Wars, T-Mobile sucks, "Daddy's Poopin' Jewels." Also make sure you get to the end, because I start laughing so hard that I literally begin openly weeping.

How to win every argument on the internet. Also Go-Bots, Transformers, racism, sexism in video games, Jonathan killing his own children, rebuilding Confederate statues, and WALLY GEORGE! Also sorry about my croaky voice, I was sick as a bucket of hair.

Carnies, eating funnel cakes with your ass, aging, Bill Cosby, baseballs made of human faces that can turn invisible or into leaves, having the right ideas.

An in-depth, riveting look at all your favorite fast food mascots from the 80s! Mac Tonight! Spuds MacKenzie! The Noid! A Sentient Talking Glove That Knows All Your Secret Fetishes! Cool Spot! Also throwing coathangers at women and removing your teeth on the way to the mall. This episode has it all and then some!

War! Death! Crime! Battles! Um, skirmishes! We cover the history of war, assuming the history of war starts at the Revolutionary War and ends at 9/11, which we CONCLUSIVELY prove was done by Al Roker and Woody Harrelson. Also 700 obligatory references to Hitler, Jesus, and Lincoln, like every one of our podcasts. A+++ must listen!!!

Everything you EVER wanted to know about Dr. Who! Also Critters, Ghoulies, falling down the stairs, Britishvania, Catholicism, and racists! Also some other stuff but I already forgot it, sorry