We're All Insane

My Mother Married My Rapist


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For 14 years, Cynthia endured unimaginable abuse at the hands of the man she believed was her father.

From the age of five until she escaped at 19, she was groomed, manipulated, and repeatedly sexually abused by her stepfather…all while living in what appeared to be the perfect family. When she finally found the courage to tell someone at 16, she expected protection. Instead, she was met with disbelief, shame, and pressure from the very people who should have stood by her.

Resources: 

https://rainn.org/ 

https://paar.net/

Check Out Cynthia: 

https://www.instagram.com/cynthiaadelgado?utm_source=qr

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On This Episode We Cover: 

→ 00:00:00 - Introduction 

→ 00:00:00 - What was her family dynamic? 

→ 00:01:48 - What was her first memory of sexual abuse? 

→ 00:02:51 - What was her next memory of abuse? 

→ 00:05:51 - What feelings dominated her childhood? 

→ 00:07:37 - Why didn't she know her stepfather wasn't her biological father?

→ 00:08:56 - How did she feel when she found out he wasn’t her father? 

→ 00:09:49 - How often was she abused? 

→ 00:10:13 - What happened when she became seriously ill?

→ 00:13:08 - How did everyone react when they found out?

→ 00:14:17 - Did her mom know what was happening?

→ 00:16:51 - Who else did he sexually abuse? 

→ 00:19:01 - How did the abuse escalate as she got older?

→ 00:24:26 - How did the abuse change when she was 14?

→ 00:26:06 - How did her high school girlfriend change everything?

→ 00:27:32 - What happened after the school reported the abuse?

→ 00:29:26 - Why was the police investigation so traumatizing?

→ 00:30:22 - How did her stepfather manipulate her from jail?

→ 00:33:19 - How did her family convince her to protect her abuser?

→ 00:36:09 - How was she manipulated into staying silent?

→ 00:38:48 - Why did the abuse begin again after he returned home?

→ 00:43:51 - How did her mother treat her differently from her sister?

→ 00:46:03 - What is a mother wound?

→ 00:48:38 - How did her mother also groom her? 

→ 00:51:56 - How does her family treat her abuser to this day?

→ 00:53:29 - Why does she still struggle to cut off her mother?

→ 00:57:17 - Why is it so difficult to understand her mother's choices?

→ 00:59:29 - How did her mother respond to the allegations?

→ 01:02:55 - What happened when he got out of jail?

→ 01:05:01 - How did her stepfather regain her trust?

→ 01:08:01 - What happened after he slapped her?

→ 01:14:37 - How did he continue manipulating her emotionally?

→ 01:17:19 - Why did she finally leave home?

→ 01:20:01 - When did she leave the city? 

→ 01:23:53 - What happened during the court proceedings?

→ 01:27:09 - How has family betrayal impacted her adulthood?

→ 01:30:20 - When did they get married?

→ 01:31:22 - How did the assault affect her mental health?

→ 01:34:05 - How is she breaking cycles moving forward?

→ 01:37:41 - How is she struggling with people pleasing? 

→ 01:40:02 - What is her relationship with her family like now?

→ 01:42:48 - Why do so many survivors feel guilty? 

→ 01:46:02 - How has becoming a stepmother changed her perspective?

→ 01:48:35 - How do you live your life with trauma?

→ 01:51:02 - Why does she feel obligated to share her story? 

→ 01:54:38 - Why is it so important for survivors to speak out? 

Further Listening: 

My Father Was a Pastor and a Predator

More We Are All Insane: 

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Join We’re All Insane Mailing List for EXCLUSIVE Content + Discounts 

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We're All InsaneBy Devorah Roloff

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