My Spouse Died Too

Widower poet Barry Johnson returns!

I first met Barry when we recorded about a year ago. Just four months before we recorded, Barry was almost dead. Three months before that recording, Barry's life was saved by a liver transplant.

In this episode,

Barry makes a confession—I urge you to listen with compassion and empathy.

Barry bares his heart about his depression-where it comes from-rough stuff.

Is Barry still pissed at God?

How work helps Barry cope. Barry reads his poem.

And Barry's personal demon: being unworthy of love.

And lots more.

Bullets

• Feeling Good, Finally
• New Pony Tail
• Still Pissed at God?
• Don't Waste This Gift
• Depression Strikes Back
• Confession
• The Thai Judgment-Free Chat Room
• Quarantined: I Hated Being Alone
• Sex Worker Ted Talk
• How Work Helps
• Poem Reading: Grief Never Changes

Thanks for listening.

Links:

Barry's past episodes with his Once-Upon-A-Time story:

The Phoenix is a Poet - Parts 1,2, and 3.

https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-35-the-phoenix-is-a-poet

https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-36-the-phoenix-is-a-poet-2-of-3

https://myspousediedtoo.libsyn.com/episode-37-the-phoenix-is-a-poet-3-of-3

Ted Talk: What a sex worker can teach us about human connection--Nicole Emma.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7xLfeTytns

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

What I've learned by doing more than fifty My Spouse Died Too podcast episodes. Not all-inclusive, just a taste of what I've discovered by talking for hours and hours with courageous widowed guest co-hosts.

You'll hear my self-accusations, personality quirks, views on life and death.

How I make deeper connections with just about anybody.

How to find gold in a conversation. How to listen better.

And I'll suggest a resource, if you take simple action, quickly changes your life in a profound way. And more.

Bulletos

• What I Learned
• My Spouse's Death Seems So Long Ago
• People Die Everyday (Neville Longbottom)
• How To Create Deeper Connections
• Sometimes I'm Wrong
• How I Get Value From Every Guest
• Judgmental-Me-Yikes!
• How To Listen Better
• Learn To Uncover The Unknown
• How To Liberate Yourself

Thanks for listening. Links to mentioned episodes and resources are below.

Book: Never Split The Difference--Chris Voss

Sister Vickey Episode 11 "Three Weddings"

Barb Flynn Episode 13 "I Love You Too, Babe"

Emeric Solo Episode 39 "Macho Man Truth About Crying"

Autumn Toelle-Jackson Episode 43 "Boldly Into The Darkness"

Jill Johnson-Young Episode 51 "The Rebellious Widow"

Tawny Platis Episode 54 "Comedian Widow: How Dark Humor Eases The Pain"

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Widowed at twenty-eight, Tawny Platis is the queen of dead husband jokes.

Tawny is a comedian, voice actor, and host of the podcast Death Is Hilarious.

Tawny's podcast explores how comedians and creatives use comedy and dark humor to cope with grief and trauma through storytelling and jokes.

In this episode, Tawny discusses her botched suicide plan. Why laughter is like her heroin. PSDD--Post Spousal Death Disorder.

Pennsylvania Serah (she's a lifesaver). Covid isolation perils. Bumble and honest dating profile advice.

Tawny thinks something is wrong with her because the same evening her husband George died, Tawny was—horny. You'll hear what each therapist said when Tawny asked "what's wrong with me?"

And so much more in Tawny's hope and laughter-filled journey.

Here are the Bullets!

• Once-Upon-A-Time
• Heart Palpitations
• Death Is Hilarious
• Sleeping With The Hottest Guy
• Twenty-Eight And Widowed
• Why The EMTs Laughed
• Laughter Is Heroin To Me
• Why I Need to Make People Laugh
• I Planned My Suicide
• Is Babs (our dog) Going to Die Too?
• Pennslyvania Serah
• My Husband Just Died. Why Am I So Horny?
• Dick-Dash and the Revolving Doors
• Tawny's Dating Profile Advice
• Nothing Replaces Physical Touch
• Hope-Filled Tawny
• Sticking Around to See How The Movie Ends

Thanks for listening. Tawny's links are all below.

Death Is Hilarious Podcast

TikTok

Instagram

Twitter

https://www.tawnyvoice.com

Facebook

YouTube

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

The Rebellious Widow Jill Johnson-Young packs this final episode with personal experience and generous professional advice.

What you'll discover…

Stacie the Mortician—Jill's new (and current) love connection.

The reticent minister who refused to officiate Jill's next wedding, and the baseless reasons why.

Jill has a stroke on tax day—A real one.

Will you grieve forever? What I was wrong about (it has to do with grieving forever).

How to be like ninety-nine-year-old actress Betty White (she was widowed 40 years ago and hasn't remarried)—or how to be like Jill with the courage, after being widowed, to marry again and again.

Trust your gut—but make sure you have this one thing in place so you don't ruin your life.

Getting naked again—with another person. Jill recommends the book Getting Naked Again by Judith Sills, Ph.D. I ordered the book from Amazon. Link here.

How to handle criticism using the Charlie Brown Criticism Defense Tactic.

Why you need a good wing person.

Is this your chance to recreate yourself?

The grief paradigm change. The five tenets of rebellious widowhood.

Boundary setting. Use this powerful skill so others don't sabotage you.

Feeling more alive when there's intimacy in your life. I talk about me asking someone out on a date, and how it made me feel just to ask.

Why you should avoid a clone of your dead spouse.

And so much more.

Thanks for listening to the final episode of The Rebellious Widow with Jill Johnson-Young. If you haven't listened to parts 1 and 2, here are the links: Part 1, Part 2.

Buy The Rebellious Widow book almost everywhere you buy books.

A great place to start is The Rebellious Widow book website: https://www.therebelliouswidow.com

Links are below to Jill's websites and social media accounts.

https://www.jilljohnsonyoung.com

https://www.centralcounselingservices.com

Twitter @grieftalker

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/grieftalker

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/jilljohnsonyoung

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/therebelliouswidow

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Part 2 of The Rebellious Widow with guest co-host, twice-widowed author, therapist, Mom, and entrepreneur Jill Johnson-Young, LCSW.

Taste Part 2:

How Casper comes back into the scene and what she asked Jill's Mom.

How to break the widow rules so you can live life on your terms without guilt and shame. The three-page bucket List.

Introducing your dead spouse. Finishing relationships—how a therapist helps you.

People uncomfortable with death: which friends or family suddenly disappeared? The Snow Goose Dress—the things you'll wear for a dying loved one. Anticipatory Grief—when your grief starts before death. Why Jill Avoids the Frozen Pea Aisle.

The awesome rebirth Jill never imagined. To avoid unnecessary cruelty: use a Fiblet. What's a fiblet?

The secret romance alias: changing names to protect the innocent.

The real reason Robin Williams took his own life.

How to get 300 gay men to sing Happy Birthday To You, and so much more.

Lots 'O Bullets

• The Widow Rules--How to Break Them
• She Left Me a Three Page Bucket List
• She Died a Good Death
• After The Funeral Everyone's Gone
• Introducing Your Dead Spouse
• Finishing Relationships--Therapy Challenge
• Discomfort With Death? Who Suddenly Disappeared?
• Secret Romance Alias To Protect The Innocent
• I'm Smiling Again--It's What Momma Wanted
• JillandLinda (not a typo)
• What's a Fiblet?
• Casper Asked My Mom for This
• Lewy Body Dementia--Holy Shyt!
• Robin Williams R.I.P.
• Like Sandra Day O'Connor
• The Starbucks Kiss
• Two Before Fifty (Dead Wives)
• Why Jill Avoids The Frozen Pea Aisle
• The Snow Goose Dress
• 300 Gay Men Sing Happy Birthday

Thanks for listening to part 2 of The Rebellious Widow with Jill Johnson-Young. If you haven't listened to part 1, here's the link. Part 1 The Rebellious Widow (1 of 3)

Buy The Rebellious Widow book almost everywhere you buy books.

A great place to start is The Rebellious Widow book website: https://www.therebelliouswidow.com

Links are below to Jill's websites and social media accounts.

https://www.jilljohnsonyoung.com

https://www.centralcounselingservices.com

Twitter @grieftalker

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/grieftalker

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/jilljohnsonyoung

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/therebelliouswidow

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Jill Johnson-Young guest co-hosts. Jill is an internationally known grief therapist, Mom, author, entrepreneur, and LCSW (Licensed Clinical Social Worker).

While in her 40's, Jill lost her first wife Linda. Then, Jill lost her second wife Casper. Casper was first wife Linda's hospice nurse. And now, Jill is married to her third wife Stacie. Stacie is the mortician who cared for both Linda and Casper. Reread and wrap your mind around that!

But that's not all…

Jill is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. In her own trial by fire, what surprised Jill is how popular conventional grief therapy training didn't fit her own experience!

What was offered as the "right way" to do grief left Jill feeling ashamed and a failure at grief. How do you fail at grief?

And that's why in her book, The Rebellious Widow, Jill rewrites the expectations of dying, death, and grief. And like a boss, Jill takes the unwritten shame-filled rules of widowhood—and shreds them.

If you're a male, don't let the title fool you. I read Jill's book twice. I finally found answers to my own questions along with a practical way to forge a fulfilled future.

Jill, The Rebellious Widow, gives you strategy, tools, and actionable tactics so you can face death, grief, and if you choose, recreate a beautiful life.

The Bullets

• Once Upon a Time
• Not Just for Widows!
• Let Yourself Grow from the Grief
• Permission to Do It Your Way
• JillandLinda--NOT a Typo
• Same-Sex Challenge
• Our Kids
• How 55 MPH Triggers Death
• Disturbed Sense of Humor
• Pushing Up Daisies Soon
• Momma's Gonna Die
• The Mission Inn Riverside, California
• She Wanted to Die Her Way
• Casper the Friendly Ghost
• She Was So Butch
• In-N-Out Burger
• I Turned Her Oxygen Off
• Unforgettable Silence
• I Hope You Dance - Lee Ann Womack
• The "Arranged" Marriage
• Stacie the Mortician

Thanks for listening to part 1 of The Rebellious Widow with Jill Johnson-Young. Buy The Rebellious Widow book almost everywhere you buy books.

A great place to start is The Rebellious Widow book website: https://www.therebelliouswidow.com

Links are below to Jill's websites and social media accounts.

https://www.jilljohnsonyoung.com

https://www.centralcounselingservices.com

Twitter @grieftalker

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/grieftalker

LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/jilljohnsonyoung

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/therebelliouswidow

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Got psychotherapy? Freud's field day on the couch. Tim revisits a childhood memory. Over and over and over.

The last time we made love. Tim recollects.

Covid loneliness. Emeric struggles.

The first thing you should do each morning, no matter what. Prescribed by a world-renowned clinical psychologist and a Navy Seal.

Let's talk codependence. Cooking for One, Eating for Two. Emeric lives alone now, and it's not so easy, yet.

Tim's late spouse Donna's last written word, and more.

If you haven't listened to parts 1, 2, and 3, listen to those first. Links:

Part 1 Three and a Half Years Since

Part 2 Three and a Half Years Since

Part 3 Three and a Half Years Since

Tim's prior guest host episode links. Click highlighted text:

Episode 3 Two Widowers Talk (1 of 3)

Episode 4 Two Widowers Talk (2 of 3)

Episode 5 Two Widowers Talk (3 of 3)

Episode 25 Want to Feel Normal?

Bullets

• Freud's Field Day on the Couch
• The Last Time We Made Love
• Let's Talk Codependence
• Cooking for One, Eating for Two
• Her Last Written Word
• Covid Loneliness
• Top Down-Bottom Up
• Bathroom Window Blinds--Just In Case
• Here Kitty Kitty

Thanks for listening.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Three and a Half Years Since (3 of 4).

The marriage question—are you all in? I wonder why my widowed friends say they'll never marry again. And does that mean they'll never be 100% "all-in" on any relationship?

Who was sleeping with the librarian?

Three and a half years since Donna died, what's Tim's identity now? After your spouse died you're invited to a wedding. But now the invitation says You and guest. Gut punch?

Is Tim still pissed at God?

Woo Woo? Tim explains how he senses his late spouse Donna's presence.

Tim examines why it makes more sense—he should have died instead. Plus more.

If you haven't listened to parts 1 and 2 listen to those first. Links:

Part 1 Three and a Half Years Since

Part 2 Three and a Half Years Since

Tim's prior guest host episode links. Click highlighted text:

Episode 3 Two Widowers Talk (1 of 3)

Episode 4 Two Widowers Talk (2 of 3)

Episode 5 Two Widowers Talk (3 of 3)

Episode 25 Want to Feel Normal?

Bull Ettes

• The Marriage Question
• Are You All In?
• Sleeping with the Librarian
• What's Your Identity Now?
• You and Guest--Wedding Invite
• What's a Paw Paw?
• Still Pissed at God?
• Feeling Her Presence
• Why I Should Have Died Instead

Thanks for listening. Join us for part 4 of Three and a Half Years Since.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Three and a Half Years Since (2 of 4).

How not to end a relationship—Never do this chicken shyt thing. Was I right to be judgy? Why Tim mourned after his very first date.

SCIENCE! The science of dating: Got chemistry? When will your family be ready to see you with another woman or man? Tim's 30-year-old adult kid says she's not ready. Hear what Tim says about this.

Are you afraid to die? Not enough words from my Indian tribe—am I talking on borrowed time?

Why are you here? (on Earth)

Plus more. If you haven't listened to part 1, listen to that first. Here's the link: Part 1 Three and a Half Years Since

Tim's prior guest host episode links. Click on highlighted text:

Episode 3 Two Widowers Talk (1 of 3)

Episode 4 Two Widowers Talk (2 of 3)

Episode 5 Two Widowers Talk (3 of 3)

Episode 25 Want to Feel Normal?

Belluts

• Never Do This Chicken Shyt Thing
• I'm Judgy--Because I'm Right?
• How Not to End a Relationship
• E.S.A.D. a Slow Death
• Mourning After My First Date
• SCIENCE! of Dating: Got Chemistry?
• Dad, I'm Not Ready Yet (to See You with Another)
• Why Are You Here? (on Earth)
• How Bolus Almost Killed Me
• Are You Afraid to Die?
• My Indian Tribe
• Familiarity Breeds Contempt

Thanks for listening. Join us for part 3 of Three and a Half Years Since.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary

Previous widowed-guest co-host Tim Schneider returns and updates us. What life is like now—three and a half years since his spouse Donna died.

How Covid-19 relieved Tim.

Introducing Ziggy and Georgia, the two naked ladies in the basement.

Tim gets set up on a blind date by an obvious Yenta—Tim's first date since Donna died. Listen to this head trash avalanche.

Facebook stalker. Might you be one too? Hear the evidence.

What to do when dating feels like work.

What's in your eulogy? And a whole lot more.

Tim's prior guest host episode links. Click on highlighted text:

Episode 3 Two Widowers Talk (1 of 3)

Episode 4 Two Widowers Talk (2 of 3)

Episode 5 Two Widowers Talk (3 of 3)

Episode 25 Want to Feel Normal?

Bullets

• Three and a Half Years Since
• Two Naked Ladies in The Basement
• Covid Brings Relief
• First Date is Blind
• Head Trash Avalanche
• She Was Just Seventeen
• Four Kids before Thirty
• Facebook Stalker
• The Yenta

Thanks for listening. Join us for part 2 of Three and a Half Years Since.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone, join me in the My Spouse Died Too community email list for members-only benefits:

• Behind-the-scenes commentary gives you deeper insight--helps you heal.
• Episode alerts so you'll know when a new episode is ready.
• Updates on past podcast guests because their journeys continue too.
• Plus more thoughts, resources, and random widowed journey stuff I discover.
• And it's the best way to contact me.

Because you shouldn't have to journey alone.

Sign-up now at https://www.myspousediedtoo.com.

Hope. Heal. Find love again.

~ Emeric

My Spouse Died Too podcast, images, logos, artwork copyright © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary. Music and lyrics © 2019-2021 by Emeric McCleary and Elena McCleary