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Co-hosts Jared Yates Sexton and Nick Hauselman break down a national address from Donald Trump that played out like a second-grader trying to fake his way through a book report. Between the threats to bomb Iran back to the Stone Age and the bizarre claim that the Strait of Hormuz will just "naturally" reopen, the performance was a desperate attempt to stall for time as market futures cratered.

The conversation digs into the grim reality behind the rhetoric, featuring an administration paralyzed by the choice between a catastrophic ground war and a global economic depression. We also look at the exit of Pam Bondi from the DOJ. Whether it’s a mutual destruction pact over the Epstein files or a move to bring in a more aggressive interim AG like Todd Blanche, the corruption is out in the open.

The episode also covers the Supreme Court battle over birthright citizenship, the Chinese hack of the FBI's surveillance systems, and the psychosexual disaster of the modern GOP—specifically the "bimbo-ification" and roleplay scandals surrounding Brian and Kristi Noem. To wrap things up, the guys share their Weekender recommendations, including a look at the chaotic documentary chronicling the disaster of Francis Ford Coppola's Megalopolis.