NatAndChat

What do you do when your religion feeds your particular mental illness, making it worse? How do you navigate that to find some level of sanity while maintaining "belief"?

After trying a number of things, including feeding the illness by doing everything she felt compelled to do (and then some) Andee is finally concentrating on both physical and mental health like never before. BUT, at the expense of much judgement from within her faith...because she is not taking the route most DO; and getting on medication. She tried that too, and it made her feel physically terrible.

Andee is tackling her Scrupulosity by looking at her life, mind, and body as something to cherish and take care of. She's decided to TAKE CHARGE, NOT ADVICE like what Betty Jo down the street would be comfortable with. Instead Andee is going to the gym, she's building her self esteem, she's refusing to allow the old mental patterns to "have a say" (which includes opinions like Betty Jo's), she's eating healthier than ever before, and drinking coffee. Some of these aren't things her religion stands behind, but they are things that keep her from going to the dark places when she was feeling like ending her life.

My hero's aren't well known people. My hero's are people like Andee who are able to Take Charge, Exercise Freedom, Make New Choices, and RISE ABOVE where they have been in the past by acknowledging the "unhealthy things".

Because I'm not religious, I want be a cheerleader to everyone interested in working on themselves, and encourage them to ignore the small-minded people who can't see beyond "rules" they insist are coming from the mouth of god. Live your life, make your choices, worry about yourself, understand we ALL have freedom. Find respect, irrespective of your BELIEFS.

Getting to know one's self is a process, just as getting to wholeness is. I found a couple coping mechanisms that keep me sane through the process. You probably do them too.

When your insides radiate to your outsides, and your inner beauty shows; you sparkle. You don't get to control it, people will SEE you, even if you are the opposite of Sparkly.

Working on one's self seems to be one of the best paths to a smoother life. Ignoring your feelings sounds pretty smooth, but the reality is THAT'S the rough road and the rough ride. We seem to have a lot of things backwards, and looking at your "stuff" is actually easier than you think. In fact, it's the easiest...since not looking, is a long term problem creator.

To say I was naive at 19 is an understatement. With no internet, it's possible today's 7 year old knows more than I did back then. One thing I was sure of...furthering my education after high school wasn't as important as babies needing to be held. I kind of feel the same all these years later, because education happens when you are paying attention. The main difference now as an adult is that I can see how awful the world can be, and how inconsequential I feel. Ultimate "difference" is really mostly mine and in my head.

Romania brought me a brother and sister. Something I don't share in this is that 100% of the children in my orphanage abandoned before the age of 4 were autistic. This "type" of autism created by being abandoned and then ignored is like a fatal form of autism that destroys the human. Which is another reason I call this "the short story". The reality; the long story -is pretty intense. My book is titled The Face of an Angel. Maybe one day it will be in print. It's more of an interesting story than one with a happy ending, because countless lives never got to be lived.

I spent a year in Romania volunteering in an Orphanage. My life and my "who" are different because of the perspective that year gave me. We don't get away from anything without being touched by others.

I sat down with my friend Jacob to explain my obsession with intonation. 

In his work as a Photographer and working for wingatewildernesstherapy.com he sees the importance of intonation better than ever after our chat. 

With his encouragement I'm creating a course on it. It will be available through me: [email protected]

I hope you too find this useful!

Sometimes you think you know something or someone, and you are WRONG!

What you do with a relationship is more choice than you'd like to admit. Being conscious, choosing perspective, and acting -all in reciprocity is vital.