Everything is difficult right now, and if we want our sanity to survive, we need to make the conscious choice to be more flexible. I realize nobody wants to be more flexible because we are busy bitching about how frustrating everything is.

But because life is so difficult, you know less right now than you ever have about the struggles of the people around you. This means turning on the light that illuminates the space in your mind for empathy while being blind as to the why.

Reasons don't matter anymore, and there are too many of them.

Everybody wants their normal back, and since nobody can hand-over normal, let's find new flexibility for ourselves and others.

How much do you know about Cortisol? Do you know that it can control all the systems in your body?  It is the fight or flight hormone that should only come into play when we need to stay alive because it shuts everything down in order for you to defend or run.

Do you know that cortisol directly impacts your pain, your sleep, your blood pressure, your muscle, your fat, your collagen, your organs, your everything, and cortisol is the stress hormone we flood our bodies with every day as we insist on getting things done.

Dr Michael Jones has written a book called World of Alpha's, and explains what we are doing to our bodies when we consistently put ourselves "in alpha mode".

We have become so proficient at "alpha mode" we think of stress and its effects on our body as inevitable and normal. It's very not normal;  we are breaking down our bodies by not understanding the problems we are creating by continuing to operate with too much cortisol.

Maybe you can relate...some people have the ability to make you feel more real, more whole, more solid...valid is one way to explain it, but it's really hard to find words because it's such a deep feeling. I call it the validation equation since it's like a formula of Mind x Heart 2 + Years x Genuineness = Validation.

What I share here is my best attempt to explain this feeling.

We can change the world, but we can't do it through hateful or violent means. If we truly care about mattering, and we do, the way to show that is through peace, love, and kindness. Adding to the violence is how we make THAT our norm. Unacceptable. Let's change the climate so all violence and harm stands out as what is intolerable. This was a hard one...my heart is heavy with sadness and extra love so necessary right now.

We affect every living thing…and each other. What we prioritize, what we do, and what we say, is the life we build.

What are you building?

What are you making?

Around you, to you, and for others?

Can you do one less thing to cause stress, harm? Can you do one more thing to create benefit? I realized recently when having so much taken away through “quarantine”, that I am but a tiny thing with little power. What will I do with that little power? And most importantly, what will I do when I see others use their little power for detriment? How will I respond?

Will my actions or words move toward or away from the choices I’ve made in the life I’m building and making?

I have been spending my year working on recording an audiobook that I wrote quite a few years ago. With that story, the events, and the person on my mind lately, I had a poem appear. I don't usually share poems, but with so much writing in my notebook going on, and so few things getting uploaded, why not share the random poem? I've also decided recently I should gather my poems...and maybe record them as a collection. Who knows. Could be a good idea. Feels a little extra personal, but I will think on it anyway. I'm trying to work on being more open and having less fear. Stretching these muscles. Once my audiobook is "out there" fear will have to be put aside. That's a huge cliff jump. :)

A local podcast: Down in the Valley with Carissa and Kali --wanted to hear about the variety of experiences people are having with quarantine, isolating, and getting or not getting the virus. This is a different listen than what I usually share. :)

Finding balance, understanding balance, feeling...balance is such a pipe dream for me and my friends. I recently thought of a way to break it down and immediately have perspective. As usual, I'm a little surprised by how simple a solution this is. I'm forever finding, the little things are the big things.

Being Open-Minded is the freedom to learn about a million different things. Then it's the freedom to grow from or attach to anything you are drawn to.

Being open is contrary to the way most people are told they SHOULD think and WHAT they should believe. Even FEARING learning about things that are "foreign" or "different".

The willingness to be open has enhanced my life in ways that have me without being bound to judgement, control, or fear that I could make god mad at me for learning. 

In my twenties I realized, that when I die, god is not going to say to me "I wish you hadn't done any thinking or learning for yourself. Why didn't you just do what you were told?"

I allowed myself to believe that if god is almighty, he/she/it doesn't need me to be one of the sheep. An almighty god is strong enough for me to question everything. The existence of a creator is not conditional upon my level of "being sold". So OPEN I am.

When I suggested sitting down with my friend Amanda who is a writer, I totally though she would choose a topic "writing related" and she didn't. She wanted to talk about her first passion, which is being a mother. She has three little kids, and although I don't have kids and there is 20 years between us, we both have so much to say on the topic.

Interestingly, since we have not been spending lots of time together, it was a surprise to realize, this was a topic where we both didn't know the stories of the other relating to Motherhood. Both of us made choices young...and Choosing Motherhood (or not) was important to both of us.