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Nightly News Roundup
Nightly News Roundup episodes
- Nightly News Roundup for May 28, 2026
The U.S. and Iran are negotiating a cease-fire memorandum that Donald Trump hasn't approved, Iran hasn't confirmed, and diplomats admit may not share a common draft. Iran's supreme leader is directing nuclear negotiations by courier from a bunker. Two juries found Trump sexually abused E. Jean Carroll and lied about knowing her — he owes her $88.3 million, so he sicced the Justice Department on her instead. Trump's 250th anniversary concert booked Vanilla Ice, Milli Vanilli, and C+C Music Factory — then lost them within 24 hours. Milli Vanilli said they were never even asked. Benjamin Netanyahu ordered the Israeli army to seize 70% of Gaza, up from the 53% his ceasefire already gave him, while fighting criminal charges at home. Trump wants his face on a $250 bill, which would require overturning a law Congress passed in 1866 after the last guy who tried it got caught in a sex scandal. Samuel Alito's son held a secret Treasury job while his father ruled on Treasury cases from the Supreme Court bench and never recused himself. Terry Pitchford didn't pull the trigger, but Mississippi put him on death row anyway — with a jury missing four of its five Black candidates. The Supreme Court noticed, barely. Tape rolls.
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6 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 27, 2026Donald Trump's Board of Peace raised $17 billion in pledges and deposited zero in its official account — the rest sits in a JPMorgan hole that answers to nobody. Trump threatened to blow up Oman, a U.S. ally brokering Iran talks, and the State Department posted it like a press release. Markwayne Mullin wants to shut down international flights at sanctuary city airports and is calling it a plan. Operation Epic Fury is cannibalizing military training — $292 million cut from Army programs, medical courses canceled, Navy recruits stranded at boot camp. Ken Paxton crushed John Cornyn in the Texas primary. His office let a child rapist walk in 30 days, no sex offender registration required. Tesla bled hexavalent chromium into a Texas waterway and questioned the methodology of the people who found it. The Kennedy Center filed court papers arguing it cannot exist without Trump's name on the building. Tape rolls.
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6 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 26, 2026Donald Trump declared the Iran ceasefire going "nicely" — hours before US bombs fell on southern Iran. ICE pepper sprayed a sitting senator outside a detention center where migrants are starving. The New York Times counted Cabinet sentences: one in six is flattery. Trump visited Walter Reed for the fourth time and declared himself PERFECT in all caps. Two million federal employees may soon sign NDAs for crimes the administration hasn't named yet. The USDA fired the bee scientists, gagged the rest, delayed their findings six months, and is now closing the 130-year-old lab keeping American food alive. Ken Paxton, impeached by his own state's legislature, is Donald Trump's pick to primary a sitting Republican senator. Tape rolls.
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5 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 21, 2026
Two officers who bled on January 6th sued to block their attackers from a $1.8 billion taxpayer payout. Donald Trump tried to attach a personal ballroom fund to the same bill. Mitch McConnell called it "utterly stupid and morally wrong." Iran spent the ceasefire rebuilding everything the U.S. bombed and now threatens to go global. Trump says he's in no hurry. He's golfed seven times since the war started. His son is getting married this weekend; the president's attendance is unclear. The EPA cleared coal plants to dump heavy metals into American rivers because AI data centers need the power. Five thousand troops deployed to Poland via a Truth Social post that surprised the Pentagon — reversing its own cancellation from one week prior. A 250-foot arch bearing a sitting president's name cleared a hand-picked commission on a century-old technicality for a structure never built. An Ebola outbreak killed 130 people before detection; an aid group attributes the delay to Trump health cuts. Tape rolls.
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6 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 20, 2026Two cops who bled defending the Capitol sued to stop their attackers from collecting a $1.8 billion taxpayer payout. Donald Trump is in no hurry to end a war with a country threatening to go global. Vladimir Putin and Xi Jinping condemned irresponsible foreign policy, agreed on pandas, and couldn't close a pipeline. Thomas Massie lost the most expensive House primary in history for asking about Epstein. A Tennessee county owed $835,000 after jailing a retired cop 37 days for a Facebook post. Cyanide bombs returned to 245 million acres of public land. Meta fired 8,000 people to build AI, then used AI to watch the ones it kept. Minimum wage will kill jobs. Taxing the rich will kill jobs. AI taking your job is just the market. Tape rolls.
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6 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 19, 2026The reason confidence artists are rarely prosecuted for their crimes is that their victims are often too embarrassed to admit they’ve been conned.
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5 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 18, 2026
Donald Trump went to Beijing and came home empty — no trade deals, no Iran progress, just a Taiwan lecture from Xi Jinping. His acting attorney general, formerly Trump's personal defense lawyer, unveiled a $1.7 billion taxpayer slush fund for presidential allies. Gulf royals talked Trump off a bombing run with a courtesy call. A jury dismissed Elon Musk's OpenAI lawsuit in under two hours. Trump's own ethics filing revealed 3,600 stock trades worth up to $750 million. Mike Johnson called congressional trading an "extreme sacrifice" on a $174,000 salary. Kristi Noem secretly freed 19 prisoners without review; twelve reoffended. In Oklahoma, a teen convicted of rape received community service while his victims sat beside him in class. The bill is yours. Tape rolls.
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6 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 12, 2026Donald Trump flew to Beijing for a lavish state dinner while telling Americans he doesn't think about their financial situation. Iran threatened to choke the Strait of Hormuz. Vladimir Putin test-fired a Sarmat nuclear ICBM and scheduled its combat deployment by year's end — while Washington offered him sanctions relief to pursue peace. The top one percent hit a 36-year wealth record; working-class wages didn't move. Trump Mobile charged $100 for a phone that might never ship. Jeffrey Epstein survivors testified steps from Mar-a-Lago and got the answer they always get: nothing. The Supreme Court gutted the Voting Rights Act. Tennessee erased its one Black-majority district. South Carolina almost did too. The FDA commissioner resigned over fruit-flavored vapes. A $1.2 trillion missile shield still has no specifications. Courts keep ruling Trump's tariffs illegal and then pausing those rulings. The letter never came. The war continues. The bill is yours. Tape rolls.
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8 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 7, 2026Trump gave Iran a one-pager and called it diplomacy. Markets called the ceasefire a buying opportunity. A kindergarten in Kyiv called it morning. This episode moves fast because the week did — from a UFC fighter's foreign policy assessment ("fantastic shape") to the dollar's worst six-month slide in half a century; from bipartisan harassment settlements being shredded on Capitol Hill to E. Jean Carroll submitting a $7.4 million interest invoice to the Supreme Court; from a Fort Worth jury and a seven-year-old girl who told her killer her mom said no, to a ceasefire that lasted until Russia found a kindergarten. Forty minutes. No filler. The memo is pending. The math isn't. Tape rolls.
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5 min - Nightly News Roundup for May 6, 2026
Donald Trump threatened to resume bombing Iran if they didn't sign a one-page war-ending memo, oil crashed to $89, and markets celebrated; he then asked UFC fighter Justin Gaethje whether the war effort was in good shape and accepted "fantastic shape" as official foreign policy assessment; the dollar logged its worst six-month slide in fifty years — Trump called it a competitive advantage, economists called it a hidden tax, Americans called it rent; Rep. Nancy Mace subpoenaed a decade's worth of taxpayer-funded congressional harassment settlements, found bipartisan shame and shredded records, and confirmed the fund remains active; Trump asked the Supreme Court to determine whether presidents can defame sexual assault accusers for free while E. Jean Carroll submitted a bill for $7,462,492.74 in interest; a Fort Worth jury sentenced Tanner Horner to death for murdering 7-year-old Athena Strand — she told him her mom said he couldn't; Ukraine declared a ceasefire at midnight and Russia struck a kindergarten by morning. The memo is pending. The math isn't. The kindergarten is gone. Tape rolls.
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6 min
About Nightly News Roundup
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A news headline show for people who love to hate the news and hate to love the news.
Art by Cory Drake.
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