No-Budget Nightmares

You're a winner! HA HA HA! Michael Fitzgerald STUFFED the ballot box for our recent NO-BUDGET NIGHTMARE poll and now he has to BEND OVER and receive his reward: a review of his 2009 no-budget horror (?) satire VICTOR JULIET'S DIRECTOR'S CUT! Enjoy Lili Taylor-esque actresses in HARDY BOYZ wrestling gear? How about superfluous documentary sequences? Goofy sword fights? It's all here! You'll even get to hear Moe get flustered by having the promise of boobs cruelly stolen away. All this and a BRAND NEW song by the AMAZING Roo!

There's a bodacious herd of Redneck Zombies back there and they're coming this way! It's EPISODE 42 of No-Budget Nightmares, and Moe and Doug are continuing the trend of SOV classics with Pericles Lewnes Troma-distributed zombie-comedy classic REDNECK ZOMBIES. If you like zombies, moonshine, VIOLENCE, ironic t-shirts, spray deodorant and PLENTY of horrible stereotypes you are in for a WHOLE LOT of luck. It's a gut-munching good time! JOIN US.

Our house! In the middle of our street! Our BOARDINGHOUSE! It's the ORIGINATOR of SOV horror, and Moe Porne and Doug Tilley find themselves perplexed while trying to unwrap the mysteries of John Wintergate's ode to hedonism/psychokinesis. If you like tiger-print banana hammocks, impenetrable timelines, dead cats, and topless nudity, you're going to want to lap up all of this delicious podcast MILK. Yum yum!

It's a NEW BEGINNING on the NO-BUDGET NIGHTMARES podcast! Sure, it's Moe and Doug breaking down your favorite microbudget wonders, but we have a *new* theme song! A *new* website! A *new* RSS feed! And to kick off our new beginning we're dipping into Gary P. Cohen's SOV VHS-era classic VIDEO VIOLENCE - a film that's been requested since we first started breaking down episodes. This one is HIGH ENERGY and there's sound drops galore, so strap yourself in, pay your late-fees and rewind your tapes. It's time for a little VIDEO VIOLENCE.

Sweet sassy molasssy! The NO-BUDGET NIGHTMARES PODCAST is *BACK*! And it's packing HEAT! And for their triumphant return, Moe Porne and Doug "Sweetback" Tilley are covering an all time nutball classic from 1994: KINDERGARTEN NINJA. Featuring NFL legend Dwight Clark as a drunken, womanizing douchebag who turns his life around thanks to MARTIAL ARTS, kids(!) and the ghost of Bruce Lee. Seriously! Clark gets a chance to fight, sing, eat french-fries, cozy up to bimbos, hilariously promote his restaurant and ACT! Sort of! And the episode ends with another INCREDIBLE song by Roo, and the promise of many, many more episodes to come. STOP READING AND START LISTENING!

Wait! WHAT?! No-Budget Nightmares is BACK?!! Why didn't anyone tell me?! Actually, the return of the NBN Podcast is imminent, but while you're waiting why not check out this LONG LOST bonus episode! Recorded way back in June, Moe and Doug tackle the wonderfully bizarre Canadian martial arts flick ORDER OF ONE: KUNG-FU KILLING SPREE, which is chocablock full of heart-ripping, head-smashings, NUNCHUCKS and heaps of wonderful Grade-A Canuck cheese.

We're CRAZY FROM THE HEAT! It's the 1988 Jon McBride/Tom Fisher SHOT-ON-VIDEO classic CANNIBAL CAMPOUT, and Moe and Doug get FIRED UP by the meaty bloodletting. This episode has it all: profane sound clips, celebrity impressions, and another brand-new song from Roo, based on the film! Head to the smokehouse, slice up some "teenagers" and dig in.

It's the classic love story. Boy meets girl. Boy shares corpse with girl. Boy loses girl to corpse. Boy... does some stuff that is difficult to describe. It's episode 36 of the NO-BUDGET NIGHTMARES podcast and we're talking about some CORPSE F**CKING ART! It's 1988's sleaze-art-German classic NEKROMANTIK directed by twisted auteur Jörg Buttgereit, and while some poor souls would only dare dip the tip in, hosts Moe Porne and Doug "SWEETBACK" Tilley have gone whole hog into this ode to dead love. Join us in the murky pool of blood, urine, goo and other bodily fluids, and stick around till the end for a very special treat!

No-Budget Nightmares is back! Back in black! Due to a certain host’s incompetence, we’ve had to call an audible this week and feature another film by SUBURBAN SASQUATCH auteur Dave Wascavage. But this glaring error turns out to be a BEAUTIFUL GIFT as we’re treated to a glorious cavalcade of incompetence, green screen-a-plenty and more stilted, awkward acting than you can shake a Sasquatch at. It’s ELEVATOR-A-GO-GO in 2010′s MALEVOLENT ASCENT and you can actually hear the point in the episode where Moe’s brain snaps in two. It’s all a bit sloppy, but that’s to be expected. BLESS THIS MESS.

Microbudget films can be EDUCATIONAL! For instance, in Bobby Keller's DEATHERMAN we learn that a combination of radiation and acid rain can cause a recently buried weatherman to return to life and CRAVE BLOOD. SCIENCE! So grab your BAROMETER as there's a WARM PRESSURE SYSTEM of murder coming your way. Thankfully, you have meteorological mad-men Moe Porne and Doug "Sweetback" Tilley to guide you through the highs and lows of this no-budget throwback on the latest episode of NO-BUDGET NIGHTMARES!