NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

Kate Meaney spent most of the night huddled over a keyboard leaving comments on yesterday’s NLO show, and she has now blocked Patrick after many accusations. It’s sad when a young comedian has no idea how the internet works, but apparently Kate is in the DANGER ZONE! Kevin Brennan is obsessed with Shuli and his viewers, but thinks Patrick is obsessed with his viewers. He bites the troll bait HARD! What a nut! Ray Devito seems to be more confused than ever. It’ a tumultuous time and I ask that you bear with us during this personal ordeal.

It’s another week of MLC drama, and Kevin is at the peak of his obsession with Shuli and Bob and their viewers. What is the prize that whoever wins this corner of the internet gets? Is there a plaque or some sort of certificate? What is Kate Meaney trying to protect, anyway? Did Geno have anything to do with a privacy complaint on one of Patrick’s videos? Do we ever need another show with this sorcerer psychiatrist again? I’ve got some yelling to do!

It’s Monday, and it’s the start of a new month, and we couldn’t be happier that you’ve decided to join us here at The Onions. Patrick went to see Adam Sandler over the weekend and aside from having to watch his daughter sing a Taylor Swift cover song for nine minutes while the Sandman wept and played guitar, it was ok. We found out one of our favorite fatties has a dirty clips site and you can download a lot of gore that is sure to turn the bits and bytes on your hard drive rotten in no time. Opie Radio really is a delusional guy. Michael Ray Bower killed a cat in his dream and he thinks it’s something he needs to memorialize from a toilet vlog. Steel Toe is so far ahead of making their goals that you’re going to be sorry. Our favorite dumb financial advisor is back with a new podcast where she interviews other dumb girls about their financial mistakes and we learn nothing.

Happy Friday! Patrick is extending November for one more day- at least on paper. What a volatile week it’s been for the whatever this is. Chad Zumock has turned out to be one of the worst actors, liars, and comedians of all time. The LOLs don’t stop when Chad uses his imagination to wow his audience with dumb. Heather Gillispie is finding out about Chicago winter while being pregnant and homeless, and it’s going to go bad. Bower has started his walking tours, and you won’t believe the loophole this time! Josh Denny goes to Florida and doesn’t have time to stop by Publix for a sandwich. Summer Sinclair really wants the part. Why don’t you like her? Ray Devito is moving to his mom’s friends house even those his mom is dead and he’s a fifty-year-old man with absolutely nothing going on in life. Strap in, because the phones don’t work again today!

Chad Zumock is desperate for attention. He’s an unloved alcoholic with no income, no prospects for a career, and no friends or relationships to lean on as a support system. After being arrested over and over for victimizing veterans and the elderly, stealing identities and credit cards, stealing from stores, driving drunk in to trees, losing jobs at radio stations, and lying about career credits and highlights, what’s a loser from Cleveland in subsidized housing to do? Chad’s latest Thanksgiving grift is afoot! Watch as we dive in to Chad’s lies and Chad’s cope on the latest EMERGENCY EDITION of Nobody Likes Onions. Who is dumber? Chad Zumock or the person he thinks you are? The startling criminal history and the journey of cascading mistakes by a dummy at the end of his rope are in this crucial episode!

It’s Tuesday morning, and the plebs are frothing in the aisles for a new NLO. What will Patrick be mad about this morning? Will there be a classic rant against one of the fans for some minuscule reason? You can almost guarantee! We check in with some of our favorite nuts to see how they’re gearing up for the holidays. Is the loneliness enough to break some of our favorites, or will the holiday spirit prevail and allow happiness to shine forth? There’s no telling, but we are definitely here to watch it all. Mchael Ray Bower is at his lowest and his blurriest on the latest stream about his health and future plans. Steel Toe is terrified of medical news and has a cool new blackface story to tell you. Chad still has no idea what he is doing and his snipe streams are becoming less and less impressive. If you’re looking for a killer banana pudding recipe and need something to do with your gross boiled eggs. we have a woman with a few tricks up her sleeveless shirt.

Just a reminder than nobody owes you anything and Patrick isn’t your real dad. You should probably find a new life with a new family. Patrick is doing a quick show to give his thoughts on the past week and the events of the day, and we are going to try to resume our regularly scheduled programming tomorrow. Why is Chad pretending to be in some sort of peril? Kevin Brennan is very concerned with everyone else and their productivity schedules. Ray Devito is getting weirder and weirder by the moment. Tookie is in trouble or something. I hope you had a nice time with your friends and family. Let’s get back to the nuts!

Patrick isn’t the only one making a splash in the world of Big Beautiful Podcasters. Josh Denny, currently on his nineteenth attempt at a show someone will care about and/or watch, has ballooned to proportions that must be examined. Watch as over a decade of podcast experience culminates in more meh than you can imagine. Chad Zumock is in hiding after running away from his own show Thursday afternoon when Patrick surprised him with a snipe session. We catch up with some of our favorite nutty ladies, including Planet with a Palate and her rotund gal pals. They’re making dip or pasta or eggs or pickle juice. It’s hard to tell, really. But they are very, very fat and very, very chill about it all. This has gotta be good!

Can you believe Kevin Brennan spends his Friday nights with a tallboy of red wine and a grin across his face as his listens to Melton in the Evenings? Tonight Patrick attempts to do a Kevin Brennan style program where he just rants and talks ish about people and plays no clips. Jk jk there will definitely be clips. Just because Kevin's computer can't handle video playback doesn't mean the rest of us can't have a little fun watching the mistakes and blunders of others! Phil Elmore calls in to talk about his brother and his taboo tendencies. It gets weird! Kevin Brennan calls in to complain about The Shuli Network. Replayables is still doing great. Chad Zumock can spin anything in to a win, despite overwhelming evidence and thousdands of eyeball witnesses.

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Patrick’s show rundown sheet overfloweth with many much more mopes to make mirth about! Sorry about that, but it’s hard to write a description for a show that hasn’t happened yet! Steel Toe is in dire straits, and they are putting out the early feelers to get their favorite benefactor Captain Chandler to send in piles of cash. Will he oblige them? Josh Denny is bigger than ever and has never had more podcast experience, but he still has no idea what he’s doing. Kevin Brennan has become too easy to impress in his old age and Patrick has some thoughts about it. There’s a new rap group sweeping the northeast and you’re going to want to grab your earplugs about it, fam. We out here on these streets!