NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

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NOBODY LIKES ONIONS episodes

  • NLO 1383: Umm, Bothered
    Thai Rivera is back at it again, trying to explain away the same altercations for the third show in a row. This one is a LOLlercoaster of emotion, as Thai can't decide whether or not he wants to make up with people from one minute to the next. He waffles from indifferent to incensed with the manic energy of a teen girl. He also cannot stop texting Patrick throughout the show, which becomes annoying by the end. Patrick reveals how he trapped Thai into all-but proving his vanity by getting him to buy YouTube views. Thai starts new fights with comics Spiro and Jozalyn Sharp, while doubling down on old beefs with Matt Markman, Gooch, Bobby and Krystle, Big Irish Jay, Trixx, and so many more. It's uncomfortable, edited to shit, and lack focus and a cohesive point.
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    1 hr 40 min
  • NLO 1382: Getting Gooky

    Patrick is joined in the studio by comedian Matt Markman, who has the honor of being the first guest in our new studio. Matt is vaccinated, and Patrick recently had his first shot of the Pfizer shot. The guys discuss vaccination and conspiracies, along with what might be in it for Bill Gates if he is, in fact, microchipping all of us. Patrick wants to get a puppy, and is overwhelmed by the number of “doodle” breeds available. Rick’s Wings N’ Rings has some new dishes they’d like to promote during the show. Matt prefers comic book movies to things like Godzilla vs. Kong, but Patrick appreciates the latter for it’s authenticity. A Tampa Bay Buccaneer us under fire for using a racial slur in a tweet. Patrick is suspicious of YouTube relaxing it’s rules for monetizing videos. The guys really try to wrap their heads around an external catheter-pump thing for ladies. Patrick performs a cursory wellness check on our old friend Daddy Derek Savage and Cool Cat, and we find out why rage rooms might just be the latest scam by big box stores to sell more televisions.




    2 hr 1 min
  • NLO 1381: THAI RIVERA vs. TRIXX Full Breakdown

    Joke thievery is no laughing matter! The Las Vegas comedy scene is spicy, and most of the bickering centers around everybody’s favorite drama donut, Thai Rivera, accusing Canadian comedian Trixx of joke theft – the most unforgivable of comedy crimes. Who’s lying? Who did what? Is there more to the story? Let’s listen to what Thai has to say, and hold his attempted joke theft exposure up to what we know about his past behavior. Let’s see what proof and substance Thai provides to try to ruin the reputation of a Canadian comedian he used to call “friend.” Is time running out for Thai in Las Vegas? Can Thai produce anything that remotely proves he had a joke stolen, much less prove he ever wrote one to begin with? The chat gets really UNBOTHERED with this one!
    3 hr 46 min
  • NLO 1380: Recalibrate Your Crazy

    It’s another weekend in Las Vegas, and the streets are sizzling with sweet, sweet comedy drama. In this show, Patrick share some great news from his HOA. He grapples with the prospect of getting the vaccine soon and asks for listener feedback. Artist Lane has some new demands from Patrick before we commence the NFT project. The show might switch to YouTube for live shows soon, because Twitch is too woke. Patrick has taken to selling graphics cards on eBay during the shortage, and has some unkind words for Craigslist shoppers. Patrick recaps all the history with Butch Bradley, as it’s become a topic of discussion again recently. Two individuals on Facebook have caught Patrick’s eye for their short fuses and inability to self-soothe. Catherine Maloney is mad at men, herself and the world, and want’s everyone to know about it. Rumor has it Josh Denny’s latest show was cancelled due to lack of sales. Brian Scolaro accepts Patrick’s invitation to do the show, and then cancels just hours later. What’s going on? Thai Rivera is accusing Trixx of stealing his R Kelly jokes. Thai Rivera gets in to a fight with Jill Kimmel, who happens to be Jimmy Kimmel’s sister. Everyone at LA Comedy Club hates Thai and takes shots when he leaves.




    2 hr 40 min
  • NLO 1379: Pure Hate

    Patrick continues bitching about the woes of home ownership, including a recent faucet repair and more HOA drama. He also recently found himself furniture shopping and purchasing some sofas from a company called Lovesac. I hope you enjoy fifteen minute rants about customer service and how not to dress your employees. NLO wants to jump on the NFT hypetrain and issue a limited set of NLO trading cards. Stay tuned for more. After a small political rant, Patrick expresses concerns for the mental health of some people on his Facebook news feed, including a comedic peer, Brian Scolaro. Please calibrate your crazy. Flappers Comedy Club is still scamming comics. Comedians are becoming more and more desperate to perform and get attention, and online shows and festivals are ripping them off. Thai Rivera is oppressing local comics in Las Vegas with lies and pressure. We get a peek at Thai’s apartment on his latest video, while we listen to him give advice to comics as if he is a comedy god.




    2 hr 25 min
  • NLO 1378: Ban Basil
    Patrick begins the show with anger about a pizza he ordered that got delivered with a bushel of basil, and he's not really a basil man. But seriously, take a bite out of this hot gardening talk. There's drama brewing in the comedy community, and while Patrick is refusing to say much, he also says quite a bit. He just wishes people would understand he's a fair man. Josh Denny is doing the podcast rounds recently, and speaking of round, check out those cheeks! Josh says he is going back on tour, but we didn't knew he was ever on tour. Also, this new tour seems to consist of one show in rural Pennsylvania bar. Dustin Diamond, aka Screech, is dead now, but the dream of owning his home could live on, if you like dumps in the middle of nowhere.
    This content is for OVERDOSE MEMBERS only. Visit the site and login or register to access this content.
    54 min
  • NLO 1377: Build a Bubble

    Patrick starts the show out with a mini rant about Twitch and their weird mechanisms for creators. A string of rapid subscription triggers something called a hypetrain, and that seems inappropriate. There seems to be some memory of Golden Corral that has triggered a very emotional rant from Patrick about chocolate fondue. Patrick doesn’t understand why conservative YouTube nuts like Steven Crowder are so interested in arguing about gender. A lesbian fan in Germany has some strong opinions. The show had the best of intentions, but an off-handed line intended to support an argument triggers a tangent of conversation, aggravation and consternation that eventually leads to a fan getting upset at a chat bot, spinning out, and quitting the show. We basically try to decide if Trump is racist, or a nazi or something else. Other strong opinions emerge and the chat room begins to eat itself. There’s no hope. Kiss your children goodnight.




    2 hr 16 min
  • NLO 1376: Phantoms & Feet

    Patrick has been working hard on rearranging the studio, hanging lights and other show paraphernalia from the rafters. With only a trusty drill, sorry, impact driver, in one hand and the other one gorilla glued to itself, it’s all sure to turn out well. The US Postal Service is getting new vehicles, and somehow they’re worse. Patrick is on the hunt for both a ghost that might be tapping or slamming things in the night, as well as what may or may not be a pack of pigeons inside a computer. Have you ever wanted to have a drag queen deliver your dinner? Us either. Do you have ADHD? It’s time we found out through a simple test. Patrick is getting a swim spa and there’s not a damn thing the HOA can do about it. Nvidia doesn’t want cryptocurrency miners buying up all it’s graphics cards. Amazon needs to figure out how to send packages without making a mess. Enough with dark mode – we get it; your eyes hurt. We get an email tip that a certain comedian in Las Vegas is super in to feet, and there’s receipts!




    1 hr 47 min
  • NLO 1375: Stonky Kong

    Patrick is settling in to the new studio, and while there’s still a lot of adjustments to make, there’s even more crap to talk about that’s happened in the past couple of months. Patrick has finally gotten a haircut, and he wants you to know about it. We talk about all the recent market moves, from the recent GameStop peaking to the latest developments in Bitcoin. Patrick wants to get a Tesla, and he thinks Bill Gates is jealous of Elon Musk. We skim the top of some political stuff, and Patrick gets outraged at the though of others having opinions, as usual. The Super Bowl was a massacre, but Patrick loved it. Patrick bought a new iPad but can’t remember why. Are we ever going to see Donda and is Kanye even okay? This question and more go unanswered in this show.




    2 hr
  • NLO 1374: What’s Poppin’?

    Patrick goes over the drama that has unfolded over the past day regarding Thai Rivera and the Savage A.F. podcast. Black Pedro blocks the NLO instagram account for no reason and refuses to answer a tweet. Patrick opens the show telling people to enlist in his new ANT army. We discuss our new sponsor and then dive in to a dissection of the Savage A.F. show, where we find out that Shang really wants you to subscribe, nobody has time for chroma keying, and so much more. The questions about this show outweighs the answers, and the chat room can’t get enough. So grab some popcorn, don’t be Shangry, and let’s see what’s poppin’! You know what it is!




    2 hr 35 min

About NOBODY LIKES ONIONS

From the publisher's feed

For over FIFTEEN YEARS, Nobody Likes Onions has been making audiences laugh at the absurd, the obvious, and the wrong. Comedian Patrick Melton, along with other entertainers from around the world,…

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