Old Souls and Seekers

“If you are looking for someone to tell you what to do, then I would offer that what you are looking for is not a coach. What you are looking for is a crutch.”

- Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)  

So many of us waste so much time staying intimidated by what life could have in store for us. Some of us have career dreams, relationship dreams or financial dreams but we always tell ourselves “someday” because we’re waiting for the right time. Well what if we stopped waiting for someday arrive? What if we finally started to move in harmony with our lives towards the growth we really want? Well we offer coaching on just that!

On today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, join us as we discuss guidance questions from some of our listeners. We’ll be going in-depth into the different parts of us that, as human beings, hold us back from the growth that so many of us desire.

If you constantly find yourself wondering why you haven’t made the progress you’d hoped to make in life, or why it feels like you keep cycling back to the same space you started at, no matter what you do to try changing your life, then this is the episode for you. Tune in to this conversation to digest some invaluable nuggets of wisdom which are just morsels of what you could gain by signing up to join our coaching program!

“It’s not about having the right decision forever.”

- Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:

Our job is not to give you the answers of what you “should do.”When you look for people to tell you what you should do, you are really looking to place the responsibilities of your actions on someone else.What’s more important than knowing whether a tradition is “right” is knowing whether it’s right for us.You are capable of things beyond your wildest dreams.The punishment you give yourself after a mistake is usually the same type of punishment you used to receive as a child.Simply understanding the source of your obstacles does not automatically solve your obstacles.Stop letting your life be dictated by your fears.Take a risk of saying yes to an opportunity that can make the difference you truly want.Stop waiting for “someday” because that day never comes. Take the risk now.

“The only thing standing in the way of your greatness is you.”

- Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet) 

 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“It’s all so temporal. Nothing is here to stick forever. It will stick forever if you are the one holding it in place.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)  Going through changes, pain and discomfort are all just parts of life. Everyone experiences them and everyone relates to them. Some have more significant effects on us than others. But what if we could look at it all from a bigger picture?

If nothing else, there’s one thing that we can take away from every uncomfortable experience that we have, and it’s that those moments are trying to get our attention. But the type of attention we give it is what makes all the difference! We can either fight it, or we can receive it as an opportunity to gain knowledge of our circumstances.

On today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we’ll be discussing the way in which we often are inclined to be impatient with our discomfort rather than sitting with it and asking an important question, “What is this experience trying to tell me?” Tune in to this conversation to learn how to look deeper into your experiences and integrate them into your growth rather than fight them.

“Structures work for a period of time, and then as we evolve, the structure stops having any validity.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:

Meet every experience of pain, joy and everything in between with a loving embrace of peace.Focusing on expectations from others can detract from our growth process.Sometimes old structures need to be dismantled and rebuilt.If we get stuck on the momentary discomfort, we miss the bigger picture.Like modern technology, our systems go through upgrades. It’s not instant and it takes time and patience.How can you give love, patience and grace to somebody if you're not giving it to yourself?Tiredness can come from trying too hard to manage and your system to feel a certain way.Transformation is unique for each person and there is no right way for it to happen. Pain isn't there to tell you to fix it, it's there to let you know that something requires your attention.

“Every single cell in your body is constantly regenerating, so if you come from that mindset around your body, you also do that with the emotional stuff as well.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)

“You’re never gonna be sad forever, you’re never gonna be frustrated forever, you’re never gonna be happy forever.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“I'm always figuring it out. I never feel like I have the ultimate answer.” - Guy & Ilan Feldman(click to tweet)  

Parenting is HARD. It’s a continuous journey of growth and development for all parties involved. But most of you already know that sometimes it’s lovely and sometimes it’s messy.

Imagine if there were ways we could effectively help our relationships flow more harmoniously with our children. We are so caught up in the act of “parenting” that we feel the need to always tell our kids what to do, how to behave and who they should be as a person. But what if that isn’t what it’s really meant to be about?

What if it’s really all about energy?

Well on today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we’ll be diving into the ways in which our energy affects our kids. Ultimately, parenting is an invaluable personal development feedback system that often gets completely overlooked. Tune in to this conversation to learn how you can turn your parenthood into a partnership with your children rather than a war.

“How can we actually start to have a vision of our kids as the greatest guides for us?”

- Guy & Ilan Feldman(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:

Your children are your greatest asset to personal growth.Our triggers are always from the same core of us, no matter where or when they happen.Discipline the child from a vantage point of 10 years from now, not just for the present moment. An overbearing parent is usually a fear-driven parent.There's usually a "conscious parent" and an "autopilot parent" at war within each individual.It's very human to occasionally feel shame or remorse for your style of parenting.If we allow ourselves to feel safe and at ease, we involuntarily help our kids feel safe and at ease. We have such a limited time with our children before they move on and grow up, so why waste so much time being upset with them?

“A teacher doesn't tell you what to do or how to think, they tell you where to look.” - Guy & Ilan Feldman

(click to tweet) 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“There’s an endless number of ways to make money, but there’s not an endless number of ways to make money that will make you really happy.” - Frankie Fihn

(click to tweet)

Life is always a journey no matter where you are, what you do, or who you know. Sadly, we often lose sight of our journey because we are conditioned to focus on the dollar.

It’s no secret that money doesn’t buy happiness. But as Robert Kanell said in a previous episode, “Having money helps, but it’s just a tool.”

That’s why on today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we are joined by Frankie Fihn to talk about finding the journey that is meant for you. Frankie is the entrepreneur behind many businesses like Sacred Plant Retreat—and in today’s episode, he unpacks the lifestyle that keeps you aligned with your purpose rather than a lifestyle overly focused on monetary gain. Tune in to this conversation to go deeper within and gain tools and knowledge that will help you figure out what you really want out of life.

You can learn more about Frankie and Sacred Plant Retreats here

“When work feels like work you’re going to have such a hard time moving the boulder. When work feels like play, you’re going to be so much better off.” - Frankie Fihn

(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:

Knowing your purpose in your career is so much more important than just making a lot of money.Find what you are actually good at. Find what you enjoy. Find who you can serve and what they need.Look at business as a collaborative effort rather than a capitalist mindset.If we find the right questions to ask, we’ll know how to find the right answers.Your plan B career can fail just as much as plan A so you may as well invest in plan A.Recognize that some entrepreneurs can succeed by risking it all and putting all eggs in one basket, and other may succeed by slowly developing their business on the side of their day job. Having a voice of doubt is natural. Rather than trying so hard to resist and silence it, just learn to sit with it. Let it pass and know that they are just thoughts and you don’t have to agree with them.

“What the world really needs is for you to innovate your gifts in a new way.” - Frankie Fihn

(click to tweet) 

 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“In full divine union with myself, I could therefore see divine union beloveds everywhere.” - Marci Lock(click to tweet)

It’s common for us to struggle with identity, self image, and life experience. We get caught up in our imperfections and become uneasy in situations that are unfamiliar.

One of the things many of us are missing is presence. It’s not taught to us in our childhood—that we are allowed to love the parts of ourselves that may seem like they are not yet deserving.

Instead, we are taught that we must work and strive and fight to “get there.” Not the opposite—just to be.

On today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we are joined by Marci Lock to discuss what being fully human is really about. Marci Lock is a sought-after mentor and change agent to global influencers, worldwide game-changing business owners and high producing leaders in living an epic life in all aspects. Tune in to this conversation to learn how you can begin your own journey!

You can learn more about Marci Lock here

“You can say you’ve experienced love throughout your life, but it’s been love based on human experience…with attachments, expectations, conditionality…” - Marci Lock(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:It’s not about “having it all” but rather being at peace in every experience.We often serve those around us because we feel the need to look like a “good person” in somebody’s eyes.We spend so much time trying to find our identity in a practice, profession or people group. Instead, we should find our identity within ourselves that is independent of external things.Being in complete wholeness and self-acceptance is a form of service to the world. There is no need to “get there.” What we need is to realize we are already “there” and focus on being fully with ourselves.Love yourself from such a place of self acceptance that you can receive support and accept the times you need it.Do you/can you allow yourself to love the parts of your being that make you uncomfortable?

“When we just [be] in our fullest love in light of who we are, you’re not affected by the environment you go into, you bring the light and illumination to the environment.” - Marci Lock(click to tweet)  

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“How can you love others if you’re not truly loving yourself?” - Robert Kandell (click to tweet)  Do you feel unhappy with your life right now?

Despite others telling you that you’ve achieved success in your career, finances, relationships and other areas, do you still somehow feel unfulfilled?

If so, perhaps you aren’t living in YOUR success. You may possess the fortune that society tells you is the dream—but deep down, is it actually YOUR dream? Maybe you know that there is something truly ingrained in you that you desire—but it has been neglected for the sake of achieving the status quo.

That’s why on today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we are joined by bestselling author, entrepreneur, philanthropist, and life coach—Robert Kandell—to talk about what might cause us to feel empty despite our “success.”  Tune in to this conversation to learn a few tools that will help you discover whether you are really living the authentic life that you seek out to live.  

You can learn more about Robert Kandell here: robertkandell.com

“How can you fully be on service to the universe if you’re not taking care of your own needs?.” - Robert Kandell(click to tweet)

The Cliff Notes:Ask yourself: What does it really mean to be a man today?Men need to wake up and pay attention to realize what they need to do to be better partners.Due to the dynamic of societal privilege, it’s common for men to feel like they aren’t allowed to feel unfulfilled with their careers and fortune even if they really are.CONFRONT yourself and honestly ask, “Am I really happy with myself in life right now?”INVESTIGATE the issues in your life. We all have some unhealthy behaviors in our life. What is causing them and how can we address them?COMMIT to a change in your lifestyle. Commit to self improvement.It is almost impossible to solve the deeper issues driving our unhealthy behaviors without the help of others.When you truly discover and declare what it really is that brings you fulfillment, nobody will be able to successfully argue against you,.

“Invest in yourself first to build your foundation, and then have your life expand around it.” - Robert Kandell 

(click to tweet) 

 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“The way you do one thing is the way you do everything.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)  It’s safe to say that the majority of us have an ideal life that we would like to achieve. Some people want better physical health, some have career goals, and others may have mental and emotional health goals. 

Well, these all have one thing in common:

They require COMMITMENT.They require TIME.They require PATIENCE.

The problem is—there are so many of us that run away from those words. We want it here and now. We want it yesterday. We don’t have time for the research, the routines, the goal-setting, the nuance. We only have time for the results. Right? Well, good luck. That’s not going to last.

That’s why on today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we are discussing the CRUCIAL importance of getting rid of the “I want it now” mindset. It creates unhealthy patterns that don’t help us sustain healthy goals. To get the life you truly want, you must really learn to love and commit to the long-term journey of getting there. Tune in to this conversation to learn why you NEED to stop trying to find shortcuts to mastery and really develop the healthy habit of looking at your dreams and goals from a long term perspective. Be committed to the process rather than the product.

“Nothing is about finding the ‘right pill’. It’s about finding a lifestyle that works for you and continues to make you feel good.”- Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:Master cleansing is a 10-day regimen of taking in only water, lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper.A master cleanse is NOT a weight-loss cheat code.Society is too stuck in a short-cut mindset. There is no shortcut to mastery.Honest ask yourself: “Have I ever really found a shortcut to mastery?” Most likely not.When you want to change your patterns, you aren’t only making a conscious decision, you are battling with years of subconscious development. Working with a coach is imperative to becoming aware of habits that are a byproduct of your subconscious. Habits that you cannot see yourself.

“There are no ****ing shortcuts.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)  

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“Relax so that you’re really at your best and you can really feel what’s aligned for you so you can take the best action.” - Eric James

(click to tweet)  It’s not uncommon for us to experience our lives and even our physical bodies in dissonance.

We wonder why circumstances in life seem to work against us, or we feel like our body isn’t operating in its best state for us to perform well at our tasks. Well all of that could actually be a consequence of the way we are used to approaching life.

Perhaps our actions aren’t in alignment with the path we have set before us. Perhaps, our body is misbehaving on a cellular & molecular level that way are oblivious of?

Today on Personal Development Without The Fluff, we are joined by the wonderful entrepreneur Eric James. We discuss mindsets and practices that can help us get more out of our lives. One of which being red light therapy which studies have shown help our bodies interact more accurately and efficiently with the energy that surrounds us. Tune in to this conversation to learn about approaching life from a spiritually and biologically more balanced state of being.

“I really understand that it does not change how I feel at all. It does not make me more fulfilled or happier to have more money.” - Eric James

(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:

We should live life and take risks as if we are certain that things will eventually work out.   The universe is ultimately always performing a balancing act within itself.When we act from a neutral place rather than a place of resistance, we can allow life’s opportunities to unfold.Sometimes taking the right actions aligned with your path will cause your logical mind to push back and tell you that it’s foolish.Red light therapy allows mitochondria to be cleansed and function more efficiently.Light deficiency is a problem in today’s society that causes the body’s cell function to be compromised. Rather than spending all of our energy trying to feel better, we should focus on getting better at feeling. 

 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“You can be in a room with hundreds of people and still feel alone.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)  One of the most common issues in relationships is communication.

Often, during heated disagreements, we have a tendency to start behaving in patterns that our system has developed as a defense mechanism over time. Some of us use anger as our outlet, while others use withdrawal or silence. But all of these defense patterns come from an internal need that feels neglected.

Our hurtful reactions to one another are a result of not knowing how to check in with ourselves during heightened emotions.

That’s why on today's episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we are sharing a coaching call with one of our clients—a couple going through the very familiar struggle of being a harmonious, coexisting unit.  Tune in to this conversation to hear Guy & Ilan’s tips and tricks for navigating relationship dissonance.

 

“The first thing to realize is that everyone’s just trying to get their needs met.” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)

The Cliff Notes:

Combat aggression and anger with soft-spoken passivity. Trying to communicate in the midst of reactionary behavioral patterns is almost a waste of time.Only allow yourselves to discuss disagreements when both of you are rested and centered.Make a commitment in your relationship to designate self-care days.Get in touch with what part of your inner childhood-self is hurting during trigger moments.At the end of the day, all we are seeking is to connect with each other.When do you feel love, acceptance and support in your relationship? When do you not?Check in with your system with compassion when you find yourself beginning to react in your unhealthy patterns.

“People come together to heal their parts because, inevitably, what we are attracted to is what didn’t get completed with our parents” - Guy & Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet) 

 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

“The energy of resistance is the second most powerful energy to manifest something.” - Guy &  Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet)  It’s human nature to worry.

And typically, it has nothing to do whether our situation feels good or bad. When we’re stressed, we worry that we’re stressed. And when we experience happiness, we worry that we’re not experiencing it more.

Our tendency to respond with negative emotions carries energy behind it that we need to deeply understand before we can overcome it effectively.

That’s why on today’s episode of Personal Development Without The Fluff, we’re jumping on a live call to discuss why we self-sabotage and what we can do to understand the energy behind it. We all know self-sabotage is ultimately unhealthy, so why do we keep doing it? Tune in to this conversation to learn ways to navigate our negative response patterns to the reality that continues to unfold around us.

“Your opinion does not matter about how reality is unfolding. It’s just gonna keep on unfolding.” - Guy &  Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet) 

The Cliff Notes:Changing “I have to” to “I get to” allows us to open up.When you put your head down at night, do you feel complete with your day?When situations are going too well, your system is triggered to believe it won’t last.Understand that your old patterns don’t want to disappear.Enjoy the show of reality unfolding, rather than trying to develop opinions about it. Become the parents your parents never were for your inner child.Our problems are rooted in childhood traumas rising up seeking resolution. 

“It’s not about the action that you take in this world, it’s about the quality of the energy behind the action.” - Guy &  Ilan Ferdman

(click to tweet) 

 

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices