Old Wives

We're back and we're celebrating in Iceland, where a peasant befriends a small man with a penchant for pilfering. The little guy gets into a stealing competition that escalates into absurdity, and when the queen hears about it, she wants in. But first, she'll have to get around her husband. Come for the Monty Hall Problem, stay for the litter of kittens.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Today we have a Croatian story about a hero who is basically a serial killer. After awkwardly deriving powers from a fairy, he sets out to get some weapons, but the smiths won't like their payment. From there, it's a series of escalating battles until he decides on an early retirement. One thing he'll never forget: breast is best.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Today we've got a Norse tale involving a third son who stumbles upon adventure after his brothers leave him high and dry. A crone points him and his donkey in the right direction, but he'll have to get past hungry dragons and pointy unicorns on his way to the castle that hangs from the sky. Fortunately they're keto, and nothing beats his meat.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Today we're in India to hear a love story for the ages. God tells Lailí there's only one man for her, and it's her job to get out there and find him—but there's only one fish who can get her to his kingdom. She finds it and hitches a ride, but the process has wasted her youth, and also she smells like a fish now. Can love prevail?

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Today we're in North America to hear about a poor Pawnee son who gets lost in a grizzly bear den. The bears razz him for a while, but ultimately let him go with some cool new superpowers. He can only live as long as the bear lives, and so he'll have to find a way to cut his BFF in on the animal powers deal. Adventure AND friendship? Everybody wins.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

We're in Martinique to hear about Madame Kéleman, an old witch whose name you'd better not forget. If you do forget, however, the crabs might know it, so you could try asking them. Head down to the spring and look for the little clutch of straw boater hats—all the cool crabs wear them. Don't miss the floor show, and please remember the two drink minimum.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Today in Yugoslavia, a manic pixie dream princess is trying to spend ten thousand hours practicing embroidery, but her parents keep bugging her to marry. She falls in love with a pigeon-man who flies into her window and into the milk bowl of her heart. After he ghosts her, she concocts an elaborate scheme to find him. But will she ever be Main Character beautiful again?

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Welcome back to Russia, where one Ivan pulls ahead of the pack. He has to kill some pretty standard-issue monsters, but the monsters' parents find out and that's when Ivan's journey really takes off. He'll head to the Invisible Kingdom in the Unknown Land with the help of some old men who enjoy beer and steam baths and they'll have a lovely time. Really.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

Today we're in New Zealand to hear a tale of two wizards, both of them jerks. What starts with a lost fish hook rapidly escalates into a wizard vs wizard war. When one of them breaks some obscure rule of wizarding and gets turned permanently into a fish, the other one is happy to take the W. After that, it's time to net his nemesis, and you'd better stay out of his way.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.

This episode marks the conclusion of our lil vacation, and of our raid on the patron-exclusives vault. If you like it, consider joining the club for fresh anthology eps every month. Until then, here's how we described this throwback to November 2020 when it was fresh:

We're back for another episode of mini stories from around the world exclusively for Patrons. This crop features kings in disguise, magic shape-shifters, an awesome party, and even a classic evil stepmother, so put on your dancin' shoes, and let's party.

For sources and links, check out our Patreon, or follow on Twitter. Our theme music is from Carnaval des Animaux, performed by Aitua.