Older Women & Friends: Real Women. Real Experts. Real Talk About Aging

When I think about moving from a home that my husband and I have shared for 32 years, I break out in a cold sweat. There's the kitchen with its overabundance of antique bowls and gadgets, my great-grandmother's china, my office with decades worth of my books, research materials, and file folders. And then there's my husband's studio with . . . Well, don't get me started. So this is where Jeannine Bryant can help save the day. She's a senior move manager who owns her own company and knows all about helping seniors or their sons and daughters. Well, let's face it, we're talking daughters. She helps find that place between too much and too little, and how we can keep the memories and not the stuff. 

Takeaways

Moving can be an emotional experience, especially after many years in one home.

Women often take on the responsibility of organizing family belongings.

Right-sizing is a more positive approach than downsizing.

It's never too late to start decluttering and organizing.

Discussing death and planning ahead can ease the burden on loved ones.

Family experiences can motivate proactive planning for one's own belongings.

Start decluttering with easy items to build momentum.

Keepsakes should be displayed or used to bring joy.

Gifting items to loved ones can create meaningful memories.

Resources like senior move managers can provide valuable assistance. 

Chapters

00:00 Navigating the Emotional Landscape of Moving

02:57 The Role of Women in Family Organization

05:45 Understanding Right-Sizing vs. Downsizing

08:43 The Importance of Early Planning

11:38 Confronting the Topic of Death

14:41 The Value of Proactive Planning

17:36 Practical Steps to Declutter

20:40 Making Decisions on Keepsakes

23:42 Gifting and Sharing Memories

26:43 Planning for a Move

29:47 Connecting with Seniors

32:53 Resources for Moving and Decluttering

https://easyrightsizing.com

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UChNA775OFJQif29NHbfuovw

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeanninebryant/

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=jeannine+bryant&crid=13KK34II4WFGS&sprefix=Jeannine+Bry%2Caps%2C91&ref=nb_sb_ss_fb_1_12_p13n-expert-pd-ops-ranker

Kelly Jackson, 73, and Sally, 75, are sisters who have lived together without husbands or children for almost 20 years. They reconnected as live-in caregivers for their mother, and during the four years they cared for her, they turned to blogging and short videos to keep their spirits up. They used the handle, "Midlife Gal's Gone Gray," and their mission was to ensure that women in their 60s, 70s, 80s, and beyond never stop laughing. After a decade living in Honolulu, the sisters are back on the mainland, intending to become senior social media influencers.

With over 300,000 viewers on their platforms and thousands of likes, shares, and subscribers, I'm betting on their success.

Chapters

00:25 Introduction and First Impressions

00:48 Sisters Reunited: A Journey Begins

10:25 Childhood Memories and Family Dynamics

17:16 Caring for Mom: A New Chapter

23:06 Finding Laughter in Life's Challenges

28:40 Political Humor and Social Media Aspirations

30:26 Words of Wisdom for Older Women

Takeaways

The sisters had a non-traditional upbringing with a mother who was not very maternal.

They decided to care for their mother when they realized she needed help.

Laughter and humor are essential for coping with life's challenges.

Moving to Hawaii was a significant turning point in their lives.

They found creative outlets to express themselves and cope with caregiving.

The importance of sibling relationships and shared experiences is highlighted.

Aging can be navigated with humor and creativity.

They reflect on their childhood memories and how they shaped their lives.

The sisters emphasize the importance of finding joy in everyday life.

Wisdom gained from experiences can be shared with others, especially older women.

https://www.youtube.com/@TheMidlifeGalsGoneGrayINF/shorts

  https://www.youtube.com/@TheMidlifeGalsGoneGrayINF/shorts

https://www.tiktok.com/@themidlifegalsgonegray

https://www.instagram.com/sallyjackson5848/?hl=en

I'm now up on YouTube.

You can watch this episode at  https://youtu.be/72wGKcF6m4U

In this conversation, Patricia Madson, a drama professor emeritus and author, shares her journey from a curious and adventurous child to a seasoned educator in improvisation.

She discusses the importance of embracing mistakes, the transformative power of improvisation in personal and professional life, and the significance of finding

purpose and gratitude in everyday experiences. Patricia also introduces Eastern philosophies that emphasize self-reflection and proactive living, encouraging listeners to appreciate

the interconnectedness of their lives and the people who have influenced them.

You can go to her website:

https://improvwisdom.com/bio.html

Order "Improv Wisdom" on that site or go to Amazon and all other online book stores

My friend and fellow podcaster, Wendy Green, is the host of "Boomer Banter."

heyboomer.biz/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendy-green-heyboomerpodcast/

https://heyboomer.biz/podcast/

Haven't made a trip to your local cannabis dispensary? Haven't talked to your physician about a medical marijuana card? Don't have a clue how cannabis may help with all kinds of health issues, from insomnia to anxiety, from certain serious diseases to focus/concentration? Or, what the hell? Maybe for relaxation and fun.

How did cannabis get a bad rep in so many circles? What role has racism played? Greed? And why the heck is alcohol seen as somehow okay when cannabis is not?

My guest today is Kelly Goldberg, a cannabis educator and advocate, about the health benefits of cannabis, particularly for women as they age. Kelly shares her personal journey into cannabis advocacy, the historical context of cannabis legality, and the various medical benefits of cannabis. The discussion also covers how to navigate cannabis use, dosage, and the importance of understanding THC and CBD. Kelly emphasizes the need for education and advocacy in the cannabis space, especially for older women seeking alternative health solutions. It's important to find an RN, MD, or a "budtender" who is knowledgeable and can answer questions and suggest or prescribe.

I assume that many of us have smoked "pot" in college and beyond. Or, at least took a "hit" or two at a raucous party. One woman I spoke to said all she knew how to do was "roll" a "joint," but had no idea about the best way to consume cannabis today.

Stick around. You'll learn a lot!

https://scps.depaul.edu/faculty-and-staff/faculty-a-z/Pages/kelly-goldberg.aspx

https://www.linkedin.com/in/kellyjudgegoldberg/

https://www.facebook.com/kelly.j.goldberg.3/

For Questions About Cannabis (or any of the other topics we've covered) [email protected]

Sally Duplantier

[email protected]

This episode, "Likeable Badass" with author/PhD Alison Fagale, covers so many bases that I've chosen more of a summary or an outline.

As I wrote on another site, Alison is a Dynamo who knows her stuff inside and out because she's lived it, taught it, and written about it.

What is it? It is a woman who studies people, the science of people. It is a toolbox that women (and men) can use to hone their communication skills and succeed at what's most important to them.

What does that mean?

Well, here you go with some examples:

The Two Dimensions of Status

The Art of Self-Promotion

The Power of Compliments

Authenticity in Reputation Management

It's always great to get feedback from listeners. You can go to my website at janeleder.net, subscribe to my site for podcast episodes, my blog 80 & Me, information about upcoming guests, and more.

Here is Alison's website:

https://alisonfragale.com/about/

And here is the link to Wellness Wednesday, hosted by Sally Duplantier. This is a free

monthly webinar series that brings practical, evidence-based strategies for healthy aging to hundreds of people each week. Each program is also recorded, so no one misses out on the inspiration and tools to live well. Learn more at www.myzinglife.com.

At 60, Denise Taylor began again: downsized, got a divorce, embraced single living, and set off on a journey that included a vision quest, game ranger training, and time living with a Maasai tribe. At 64, she completed her doctorate exploring how people find meaning after full-time work. That research became the seed for ThriveSpan, one of nine books, a model, a philosophy, and a way of living more consciously in later life.

"I could see the future," Denise said. "If I were going to make any changes, I'd better make them now."

Single living was difficult. She realized that she had no friends. Denise and her ex-husband had done everything together. There'd been no room, time, or convenience of friends. But she put in the time and energy and developed enough social contact to make her happy.

But the beauty of being single allowed Denise to make her own decisions. She no longer had to placate her ex. "There was such freedom," she said. "Every decision is mine."

You'll want to listen to Denise talk about her experiences as a vision quester (Is there such a thing?), her time spent with a Masai tribe, and the owner of four acres of woodland. "Nature has influenced me in so many ways; it certainly influences my writing and the connection I feel to Mother Nature."

https://denisetaylor.co.uk/

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/retirement-relevance-question-who-we-without-doing-dr-denise-taylor-9vn1e/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/denisetaylor/?originalSubdomain=uk

"We don't want to be younger versions of ourselves: We've worked too hard to get where we are today."

"Aging is a process of living." Guest Tracey Gendron, professor, author, and activist, reminds listeners that we don't want to be younger versions of ourselves: We've worked too hard to get where we are today. However, the way we learn about aging is filled with misconceptions. We've never learned the truth; instead, we think of aging as a process of physical decline and don't look at the "growth part." Yes, Tracey says, loss and decline are real. There's no getting around that. But so is change and growth. Research shows that as we age, we tend to focus on things that make us feel better, and we are much more able to "prune" the relationships and things that are not working for us. It's part of the wisdom we gain. We understand that we've wasted a lot of time on people who don't give us joy. "The world gets smaller but richer because it is filled with people and things we love.""Older Women & Friends" is richer with Tracey as this episode's guest.Her book, Ageism Unmasked, has garnered oodles of praise like this:“This book is a must-read for anyone who is aging — and that is every one of us! "Jill Vitale-Aussem, author of Disrupting the Status Quo of Senior Livinghttps://www.traceygendron.com/homeAgeism Unmasked: Exploring Age Bias and How to End It-  https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/700435/ageism-unmasked-by-tracey-gendron/9781586423223/OR wherever you buy books

It's a new trend, well, maybe not that new. Couples in committed relationships are choosing to live apart. Interesting, eh? The couple might be married, maybe not. Perhaps they are divorced; maybe a partner/spouse has passed away. Whatever the circumstances, these couples agree that they don't have to share the same space to have a happy, healthy relationship.

Vicki Larson, today's guest, has written LATitude: How You Can Make A Live Apart Together Relationship Work. "It seems as if women 50-plus are the movers and shakers," she says. "Many women (and men) are uninterested in replicating past marriages or long-term commitments."

While the statistics don't tell the whole story, it is estimated that ten percent of American couples and those in other countries are living together apart. "It's becoming much more common than we thought," says Vicki.

Vicki tells the story of her own parents, who lived apart for ten years. "It didn't faze me," she says. Her mother left New York City and moved to Florida. She had had enough. (They eventually lived together again.)

Vicki points out that there are no rules when it comes to LAT relationships. Couples fashion whatever works for them. For some, the idea is terrifying. For others, it is a grand creative adventure.

What are some of the benefits of living apart together, according to those who've embraced the arrangement? It gives some breathing space, a "room of one's own." For others, it brings a sexual novelty to the relationship. Still others subscribe to the sentiment that "absence makes the heart grow fonder."

There are, of course, downsides. The romantic partner may not be accepted by the other partner's children. The negative response from some ("Why even get married or commit when you're not living together?") can cause tension between friends and acquaintances. And there are feelings of jealousy/a lack of trust between some couples.

Again, Vicki stresses that living apart together is not for everyone and is not better than traditional relationships, just different. Deciding to live separately requires a lot of discussion, decision-making, and change. But for some, the setup is exactly how they want to live, what for many is a second or third shot at a long-term romantic relationship that works.

https://www.vicki-larson.com/

https://www.facebook.com/vlarson/

https://www.vicki-larson.com/books

https://www.linkedin.com/in/vickilarson/

How to contact Wendy Battles, host of Reinvntion Rebels

https://reinventionrebels.com/about/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/wendyabattles/

Maria Leonard Olsen is a civil litigation lawyer, a journalist, and an author. When she turned 50, she got divorced, got sober, and became an empty nester. For the first time in her life, she was living alone. And for the first time after 15 years as a full-time mom, she had to find a law firm that would hire her.

Many women would have folded under the pressure, the loneliness, the Herculean task of putting a life back together. Not Maria. On the suggestion of a friend, Maria decided to try 50 new things in her 50th year. And some of those things were big, real big. Teaser: She bought a motorcycle with a sidecar for her dog. (All these years later, [Maria is 64], she rides on the back of her partner's motorcycle and experiences the freedom that helped her heal.)

Her two-month stay as a volunteer in the poorest section of Nepal made her realize that it's not the number of things you have, but the friends, family, and shared experiences that make us happy. She began to understand that the life of gratitude is so much more precious than trying to be something she was not. A self-described "people pleaser," Maria set out to work on pleasing and loving herself.

Today, one of Maria's greatest joys is helping others. Her experiences with alcoholism, sexual abuse, physical abuse, and racism have given her first-hand knowledge of the suffering and the joys of healing.

Maria is a woman you'll want to get to know.

https://www.marialeonardolsen.com/

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nR3cM9aRjes

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07B4PPYJW/?bestFormat=true&k=50%20after%2050%20book&ref_=nb_sb_ss_w_scx-ent-pd-bk-d_k0_1_8_de&crid=1LZ6M942D3A5U&sprefix=50%20after

Join me in this enlightening episode as I sit down with Gina Vild, author of The Two Most Important Days: How to Find Your Purpose and Live a Happier and Healthier Life.

I don't know about you, but I've been in a constant state of fight or flight. It feels as if the United States and the rest of the world are upside down and that there is very little we can do to find joy and awe.

Enter Gina Vild and the wisdom she brings to the table, essential wisdom if we are to survive and thrive.

Gina shares her journey from political activist to communication director, from associate dean at Harvard Medical School, to author.

She talks about how poetry, personal purpose, and setting emotional boundaries can transform your life and find joy and awe in everyday moments. It is these moments and moments that we relive from our past that can change our brain waves and levels of "feel good" chemicals like serotonin.

Tune in to learn how to navigate life's challenges with grace and strength. Habits that help us stay sane in tumultuous times.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/gina-vild-908a648/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/contributors/gina-vild

https://www.instagram.com/ginavild/

https://www.facebook.com/gina.vild/

https://www.amazon.com/stores/author/B075FFS7NM?ccs_id=71032ad2-f47c-48f8-8518-35e72e6f4d84

POETRY

William Stafford, "Yes"

https://reflections.yale.edu/article/reformation-writing-next-chapter/poem-yes

William Stafford, "Thread"

https://www.slowmuse.com/2019/06/16/the-thread/

Ilana Landsberg-Lewis

https://www.wizwork.net/sign-up

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ilanalandsberglewis/

https://ilanalandsberglewis.com/elementor-1000/