I’d just conducted a performance of the Broadway musical Hamilton in San Francisco in 2017 when I experienced a heart attack on my way home. Tests proved that my right coronary artery was 90% blocked, and two stents were placed to get me on the road to recovery.

I was 43 years old.

Work with a psychologist would later identify stress as the main cause of the attack. It would also uncover perfectionism as its silent partner. My own endless demands (and dubious lifestyle choices) driven by my bullying inner critic and fear of professional failure had finally taken their toll.

Thankfully, I’d cleaned up my lifestyle several years earlier, but I needed a different approach to my work, one that would enable me to find a healthier balance between my perfectionism and the incredibly high standards that came with being the music director of the world’s most popular musical!

My psychologist introduced me to self-compassion, a proven technique that moderates the link between perfectionism and depression and helps perfectionists manage their traits in healthier ways. It proved to be a game changer.

Here’s what I learned:

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Read by Marie T Russell. Publisher InnerSelf

Music By Caffeine Creek Band, Pixabay

JULIAN REEVE is a former music director of the Broadway musical Hamilton turned perfectionism contributor, and speaker.

He recently published his first book, Captain Perfection & the Secret of Self-Compassion, a self-help book for young perfectionists that empowers children to develop healthy management techniques for their maladaptive perfectionism through self-compassion.